Brave
Marks on my skin and lines on my face, they tell the story of my life. You can follow the milky-white of a scar with a fingertip and find all the unspoken words to some bloody tale. But you know this, don't you? You know of these escapades and you name them 'bravery'. You call them 'hero' and you create someone far better than the woman just sitting here... the woman just sitting here, trying to figure out how to fight this slow poison that is taking you from me... just a woman, who does not feel that much like a savior right now.
I am a woman, being asked to let you go. And I don't feel brave now.
Xena
wants to ignore the voice, the wounded phrase coming from those dying
lips. The greater good wins again, in this one deed from a village
girl foolish enough to follow a broken warrior. But it is not enough,
not this time. No recriminations work their familiar magic upon
Xena's mind.
She
is just a woman, watching the dearest friend and the greatest love...
slip out of her grasp.
All
for the greater good. All for the reasons that brought them together.
All for everything that has led them to this place, to this
moment."You
always said I was the brave one... look at you now..."And
Xena nearly chokes on the words, the truth and the sorrow and the
acceptance like a jagged stone within her heart.
This will be the deepest cut on my body, the one that will speak of your passing. It will forever stand out from the others, with no one around to turn it into some kind of fiction... This wound will wear your name.
And
I don't feel courageous now, Gabrielle, as I watch you disappear
before my eyes.
I
am just a woman who is losing everything.
And
I am not the teacher now, always two steps ahead. I am your student
this time, being asked to learn the hardest lesson of all.
And I am not the brave one today, Gabrielle. Not this day. Not in this hour. Not now...
END