Keneric Cartters(buttman), hint of tweekman. Oneshot, maybe. Felt the urge to write and decided to post this snippet. One-sided crushing from my favorite blonds towards one of my favorite characters.

Warning: Light amount of swearing, male relationships, no beta

He felt like he'd been hit by a freight train...quite literally might he add.

'I don't think i'll ever get used to this.' He thought, digging his palm into sleep swollen eyes.

Sighing, his hand dropped to his lap as he gazed lazily around his unkempt room.

'Still the same as always...'

Nothing ever seemed to change from his childhood. Even now at seventeen he still lived in the same shitty house, went to the same shitty school, in the same shitty town.

Oh and he still died like five times a week.

It seemed like he was on a nonstop roller coaster that kept going around the same bend over and over and over and ov...

Well almost. He smirked, swinging his legs onto the floor. Feeling strangely energized.

An hour later...bus stop

There was just something about him. Either love him or hate him, the latter more often than not; But Eric Cartman was definitely something else.

Annoying, arrogant, narcissistic, and an all around psychopathic social-path were words to describe him.

...and one Kenny McCormick was hopelessly and endlessly in love with him.

Here he was actually enjoying a nice conversation with Cartman.

'His Eric.'

He adored these moments, when he got to see this side of the teen. A side few other have had the privilege to witness. When no one else existed but them.

The brunette was far more open and rarely felt the need to tease without an audience. Eric could be just Eric and Kenny could be Kenny. After all wasn't that how best friends forever were supposed to be.

All in all it had started off as a perfect day. Stan and Kyle hadn't arrived at the bus stop yet. The sun was actually out for once and he wasn't freezing his butt off.

However, like many things in his life. Things just didn't seem to go his way.

Within minutes one Leopold "Butters" Stotch decided to show his face.

Once again their private moment together was ruined, interrupted for who ever knows how many times.

He just couldn't get a break could he.

He could see those walls going up again. He knows, years of being so close to the brunette has allowed him to read the teen. See the signs, learn what makes him tick, and avoid the worst of his blowouts. He probably knows Eric better than he knows himself.

That doesn't help him this time however.

He grunts as the blond bimbo squeezes between them and he swears he sees a small smirk of triumph shot his way from the other blond.

'How dare he.' He thinks, feeling his eye twitch.

Butters is rambling a mile a minute and he's not listening to a word of it. His gaze meets Eric and he can tell the brunette looks as annoyed as he feels. It brings him some small amount of solace.

It doesn't stop his jealousy as he witness's Butters wrap his arms around a red sleeve. It takes all of his self control not to rip the lighter haired blond off.

He curses not for the first time Eric's new patience level. If there was one thing that grew bigger over the years it was that. As the brunette's weight shrunk, his tolerance for things and people grew larger.

He still had anger issues and a sadistic streak a mile wide. It was just harder to set him off...well...somethings at least...and a whole lot less than his childhood self...for the most part anyway.

Eric was by no means thin but more of a pleasantly plump type now. Personally the dirty blond liked him either way. Made for the best hugs, rare that they may be.

And boy did the brunette have an attractive face to boot. Apparently he took after his mother in more ways than one.

Too bad others had noticed. Although he's pretty sure Butters has liked Eric even before that.

And he knows that the fairer haired blond has wormed his way into brunette's heart, nearly where Eric keeps him. It hurts. Even if he knows Eric won't return it. Even if he feels confident about his BFF status with the bigger teen.

It still shakes him. Both chasing after something just out of reach. They are far too much alike. Their similar features don't escape him either.

It only adds fuel to the fire. He catches himself wondering if Eric has a thing for blonds. The brunette definitely seems to surround himself with the fairer haired. Or at least has some uncanny ability to draw them to him.

Of course they were still friends with Stan and Kyle but more often than not the brunette is hanging out with him or butters. He's pretty sure that that's why Eric has Tweek spend time with them sometimes too.

The brunette will always make some kinda show, get all huffy and puffy. Explain why he can't stand the twitchy blond's messy appearance. Tweek will usually respond with something like its the coffee's fault again.

Bullshit. He knows the messy haired teen hasn't had coffee in weeks or at least not anything his parents have made. He's seen Tweek look completely presentable one minute, only for Eric to turn the corner and him to look a mess. Running up to the brunette to have him fuss over him. Button up button, smooth wild hair, ask him why he's drinking his parent's coffee again.

In Eric's own dramatic angry way with lots of swearing and yelling of course. But fussing none the less.

Its brought the McCormick an endless amount of anger on more than one occasion.

Sometimes he thinks about doing things like that. Drawing the brunette's attention to him by acting helpless like Tweek or clingy like Butters. But no, he can't. His pride won't allow it. He's pretty sure Eric wouldn't either. The brunette knows him too well.

He sighs in relief as Stan and Kyle walk up. For once happy to have them interrupt. Eric throws his arms up in exasperation, effectively releasing Butter's hold.

The platinum blond pouts and he can't stop himself from grinning behind his jacket. Victory.

"What took you so long Jew?"

"Hey shut up fat-ass, I was helping my dad find his keys." Kyle fires back.

"I'm not fat, i'm big boned!" The brunette fumes as their bus arrives. The doors opens and as Eric walks on the McCormick wastes no time cutting off the smaller blond to stea- er claim his rightful place next to the bigger teen.

He bites back a laugh at the dark glint in otherwise sky blue eyes as the platinum blond is forced to sit a few seats away.

Perhaps somethings really can go his way.

I'm writing this as sleep is trying to overtake me. Hope you liked it and let me know what you think!