Arnold walked into the boarding house's TV room where several of the boarders were watching the mayoral debate between incumbent Mayor Dixie and first-time candidates Councilman Marty Green and Ex-Councilman Gladhand.
"Clearly an issue here is the influx of illegal immigrants coming into Hillwood City," said Gladhand. "We have all these illegal immigrants ruining our fair city, with alien surnames like 'Kokoshka' and 'Hyunh!' They're all two-bit petty crooks and thieves, or worse…"
Marty Green cut Gladhand off. "I don't think keeping out immigrants should be a priority. This city was founded on diversity, and has been a melting pot for centuries. My great-grandfather Morris Green came to Hillwood with nothing but the butcher's apron on his back, and founded the first kosher butcher shop in Hillwood history."
Mr. Hyunh looked disturbed by Gladhand's remarks. "Oskar, did you notice that he said our names?" he asked Oskar.
"Eh,sorry, I wasn't listening," Oskar said, and took off his walkman. "I was listening to 'Pet the Kitty' on audiobook, uh heh heh heh!"
"Oskar, this is very serious!" said Mr. Hyunh. "We are both illegal immigrants! Councilman Gladhand is very scary! I do not want to go back to Vietnam! I do not think you want to go back to Czechoslovakia!"
"I barely even remember being there anymore," said Oskar. "I was drinking so many smoothies back then."
Arnold butted in. "Oskar, Mr. Hyunh, if you are so worried, why don't you take a citizenship test to become citizens of the United States?"
"That is crazy talk! I have never taken a test in my life!" said Oskar.
"I will take the test! I will become an American citizen!" said Mr. Hyunh.
"Great, I'll go with the two of you to the citizenship office tomorrow," said Arnold.
The next day, Arnold went to the citizenship office with Oskar and Mr. Hyunh.
"What are you here for?" asked the bored office worker.
"These are my friends Mr. Kokoshka and Mr. Hyunh. They're immigrants and wish to take the American citizenship test."
"Here you go," said the office worker, and handed citizenship tests to the two men. Arnold waited patiently for them, and within an hour, they were done.
"Well, let's look over your scores," said the office worker. "It seems here that Mr. Hyunh is now an American citizen. But Mr. Kokoshka has the lowest score in the history of the American citizenship test, and I'm afraid he will not be an American citizen any time soon."
"Oh, Arnold! You have to help me!" said Oskar. "I don't know anything about this country! Not that I knew anything about my home country either, uh heh heh heh!"
"Oskar, maybe you need to read books about American history and government," said Arnold. "There are plenty of informative books at the public library."
"The public library?" asked Oskar. "I thought that once I learned how to read, I'd never have to set foot in there again!"
"Well, it's your choice," said Arnold. "You can read books at the library and pass your citizenship test, or you can remain an illegal immigrant and have to worry about ex-Councilman Gladhand becoming mayor."
"I am glad that I will not have to worry about Gladhand! That man is very scary!" said Mr. Hyunh.
"Okay, I will try to learn more about this country if it means I don't have to go back to Czechoslovakia," said Oskar.
"You do know Czechoslovakia isn't a country anymore, right, Oskar?" asked Arnold.
"If it isn't going to be on the test, I don't need to know it!" said Oskar.
"You sound like some of my classmates," said Arnold.