Notes: Code Geass is an anime that was done by the studio Sunrise. This story is a parody and is not meant to be taken seriously.

Lelouch Lamperouge was a young man, who used to be a Britannian prince. However, he left the kingdom behind, because of the differences he had with his father, Emperor Charles. Charles was a rude, grumpy old-man, who had dangerous an evil plans. Also, Charles had really weird, corny-looking white hair and Lelouch didn't like that. After all, Lelouch had a slick, eloquent black hair, so he left the kingdom behind and became a student at Ashford Academy. Lelouch didn't know what he wanted to do with his life, so he often did petty things, like skip school and gamble.

After gambling, Lelouch rid on Rivalz's motorbike. Lelouch and his friend looked down and saw a truck parked in the middle of the road. Lelouch put his hand on his chin and said, "I wonder what that's about. I better go help the driver."

Rivalz asked, "Should I help you?"

Lelouch looked at his friend and said, "No offense, but you never do anything important."

Rivalz replied, "Fair point."

Lelouch looked at the truck and started playing on-top of it. He accidentally fell into the truck, which started driving. Lelouch said, "Oh no." He looked around and saw Kallen Stadtfeld. He whispered, "Her hair's pretty. Pink's my favorite color, other than black." He got out a mirror and admired his hair, while the truck kept going.

Meanwhile, Prince Clovis, one of Lelouch's corrupt half-brothers, was in his lair. Clovis had a smug smile on his face, while saying, "I'm going to accomplish big things around here. I'm going to dominate all of Britannia!" He laughed.

General Bartley walked to Clovis, while clearly looking nervous. Bartley said, "Your highness, I'm afraid I don't have good news."

Clovis asked, "What is it?"

Bartley nervously started sweating, while saying, "I'm afraid you're not going to be a regular character."

Clovis punched a nearby table and asked, "What are you talking about?"

Bartley said, "The Britannians are predicting you'll only be in three episodes, before getting defeated."

Clovis' ego was hurt by that piece of news. He was stubborn to remain a prominent character, so he said, "I'm not going to let that happen. I'm going to have a random people destroyed, just to show evil I am. I'm not going to let my family take the spotlight away from me. I'm going to be the main villain." He did an evil laugh.

Meanwhile, Lelouch got out of the truck and realized he was in a building, that was in rough-shape. He didn't see anybody at first, so he thought he was alone. However, a bunch of guys came by and pointed their guns at Lelouch. Lelouch stuck his arms in the air and asked, "What's going on?"

A military general said, "It's all over. Instead of just shooting you right now, I'm going to keep rambling on. This'll probably lead to my downfall, but I really love the sound of my own voice."

Suddenly, a mysterious woman, who had green hair and was named C. C., appeared. She stood in front of Lelouch. The military general tried to shoot her, but it didn't impact her.

Lelouch had a surprised look on his face, while asking, "Who are you?"

C. C. said, "I am C. C. These men are probably going to shoot you, if their general ever stops talking. I'm assuming you don't want to get shot, so I propose a deal."

Lelouch asked, "What's the deal?"

C. C. said, "I'm not going to tell you any of the details, until several episodes. That way, I get to rip you off and I get to have a mysterious, secretive personality that fans will love."

It was a pretty shady offer, but Lelouch was known for accepting lots of questionable deals. He said, "Very well then. Even though I don't know what I'll have to do in return, I accept the terms of your contract."

C. C. replied, "Wow, you're arrogant and brash." She gave Lelouch a power, for saving his life.

Lelouch felt a tingling feeling in his eye. He asked, "What's going on?"

C. C. explained, "It's a geass. It can be used to hypnotize people. Go ahead and try it out."

Lelouch looked back at the military general. The general and his men could of shot Lelouch at any time. However, they had been just standing around, because they weren't very bright. Lelouch said, "General, do you remember when you said it's all over? You turned out to be right. It's all over, for you." He used his geass on the general and his men and said, "Become professional ballerinas!"

The general smiled and replied, "Happily, your majesty. Alright, soldiers. Get on your tights." The general and his men started dancing, while wearing ballerina costumes.

C. C. looked at Lelouch and asked, "Why didn't you use your geass, to make them surrender or something like that?"

Lelouch said, "I've never used a geass before. I assumed you were lying about me having a new power, so I joked about making them become ballerinas. It turns out that I actually do have a power."

C. C. replied, "It also turns out that you have an immature sense of humor."

Lelouch smirked and responded, "Indeed I do."

The next day, Suzaku Kururugi was moping around Lloyd Asplund's laboratory. Cecile Croomy looked at him, with a smile on her face, while gently asking, "Why do you look so gloomy?"

Suzaku answered, "I'm trying to look overdramatic, so people will take me seriously."

Lloyd pranced by and said, "That plan has no chance of success."

Suzaku ran by Lloyd, because he wanted a chance to do something big and important. Suzaku seemed like a friendly, calm guy, but deep down, he was a condescending hypocrite. Because of that, he was a desperate to do heroic stuff, so he could feel better about himself. Suzaku wanted to stop the wars of Britannia and protect the country of Japan. His job was being a part of the Britannian military. You're probably wondering why a hater of Britannia would join the Britannian military. Suzaku thought that working on the team he hates was a good way to protect the people he loved. In other words, he was a confusing, poor-decision maker and a lousy hero. He tapped Lloyd's shoulder and said, "I've been sitting around and doing homework for too long. I want field work. I'll need something to fight in."

Lloyd smiled and replied, "Very well then." He pulled down a curtain and presented a new mech. It was white and yellow and was taller than any person. Lloyd said, "I call it the Lancelot."

Suzaku looked confused, while asking, "Why?"

Lloyd had a nerdy smile on his face, while saying, "Because I'm a Sir Lancelot fanboy."

Suzaku started driving the Lancelot and he intended on stopping the Black Knights. The Black Knights were a team of punks, who wanted to stop the evil Britannians and save Japan. Although their goals were noble, they weren't very experienced or clever. Instead of brainstorming a clever plan, they just went around and picked fights with random Britannian officials. They weren't very bright and their lacks of cleverness was putting their operation in danger. The team's leader was Kaname Ohgi, a well-intentioned, but clueless guy, who struggled to make any important decisions. Another team member was Tamaki, a loud, immature, pointless team member, who was employed by Ohgi, despite not adding anything of value. Then there was Kallen, who's actually pretty awesome and would be a much better leader than Ohgi could ever be. There were a few other members, but they hardly ever talked or did anything. Despite that, they were still more useful than Tamaki.

Suzaku started using the Lancelot, so he could scare the Black Knights. He was joined by the gothic Villetta Nu and the overly-confident Jeremiah Gottwald. Suzaku angrily started beating up random members of the Black Knights, while saying, "I'm going to attack semi-innocent people, so I can feel better about myself."

Jeremiah had a smug smile on his face, while saying, "Those Black Knights are despicable pests. How dare they not be loyal to the Emperor."

Kallen angrily replied, "But the Emperor is an offensive, evil man."

Jeremiah responded, "Even though that's painfully obvious, it's rude to not respect the guy in charge." He started attacking the Black Knights, while saying, "I'm going to bring you all down!"

Villetta looked concerned, while saying, "Jeremiah, don't push your limits."

Jeremiah smiled, while replying, "I'm too awesome and corny to have any limits!"

Kallen looked at the leader, Kaname Ohgi, and nervously asked, "What are we supposed to do?"

Ohgi shrugged his shoulders and said, "I'm not sure."

Kallen replied, "Ohgi, our lives at risk and you can't think of anything to protect your team?"

Ohgi felt guilty, while saying, "Gosh, I truly am sorry, but I woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Plus, I'm not a very witty person, in general."

Suddenly Ohgi got a call on his phone. Lelouch was calling him, while hiding-out in a mech of his own. He said, "Attention punks, if you want to start doing something useful with your life, I suggest following my orders."

Ohgi asked, "Who are you?"

Lelouch answered, "That hardly matters right now. Just call me Zero. You're so bad at leading your team, that even a stranger could do a better job. That's why I'm taking over. Follow my instructions."

Tamaki screamed, "We're not going to do that!"

Ohgi sighed and said, "We'll do whatever you say."

Kallen looked at her leader and asked, "You're willing to listen to a stranger's commands?"

Ohgi sighed and said, "I suck at being the leader. It's about time this team has a leader, who has good ideas and common sense." Lelouch gave the Black Knights instructions, which they used to avoid being attacked by Suzaku and the others. They managed to get away. They were thankful to Lelouch. They didn't know his name, but they knew he was far smarter and wiser than they were.

A few minutes later, Prince Clovis was pacing around his lair. He was feeling paranoid about his mission. He sat back on his throne, while trying to relax. He said, "I shouldn't worry about this, at least not too much. A lot of people think I won't be a prominent character, but I'm proving them wrong. I'll last through the entire show."

Lelouch stepped out of the shadows and replied, "I don't think so."

Clovis smiled and said, "It's good to see you, little-bro."

Lelouch pointed a weapon at him and replied, "You shouldn't be too glad about my visit."

Clovis frowned at him and asked, "What are you doing here?"

Lelouch had a sneaky smile on his face, while saying, "I'm here to make sure you don't become a supporting character."

Clovis nervously replied, "Lelouch, please spare me. I think I'd make a good villain."

Lelouch responded, "Sorry Clovis, but you're not compelling enough." Lelouch defeated Clovis. Clovis failed his mission of becoming the show's main villain.

The next day, Lelouch was in a Student Council meeting. The Student Council were a bunch of slackers, who were led by the eccentric, goofy Milly Ashford. Milly started jumping with energy, while saying, "Come on, my partners in chaos. Let's do goofy stuff, because we're comedy reliefs!" She put on a party hat and started jumping around the other students.

Shirley Fenette was a sweet, lovesick girl, who had a crush on Lelouch. She looked at Lelouch, while blushing. Milly looked excited, while saying, "Shirley has a crush on Lelouch."

Shirley stubbornly said, "I don't have a crush on Lulu."

Milly asked, "Lulu?"

Shirley explained, "It's my affectionate nickname for him." She paused and said, "Despite me obviously having a crush on Lulu, I'm going to act like I don't." Lelouch didn't notice Shirley saying, because he was distracted by a self-portrait of himself.

After Lelouch to class, he saw that Kallen had returned to class. Kallen hadn't been attending class for a month, because she was helping the Black Knights. However, that was a secret, so she pretended she was sick, in order to explain her absence. One of Kallen's classmates asked, "What kind of sickness did you have?"

Kallen calmly answered, "A cough."

The classmate asked, "You missed a month of school, because of a cough?"

Kallen answered, "It was a powerful cough."

Lelouch thought Kallen was a childish weakling, for missing a month of school just because of a few coughs. He suddenly remembered that she was a part of the Black Knights, which was the real reason she'd been absent. He used a folder to hit himself, because he felt he was being dumb.

Lelouch walked outside and saw Kallen. He was suspicious about her and what she was planning on doing. He walked up to her and said, "We need to talk."

Kallen sighed and asked, "What is it?"

Lelouch used his geass on her and said, "Tell me everything about the Black Knights." Kallen went into great detail, about the Black Knight's goals and history. Lelouch started writing her words down, before getting bored and yawning.

After Kallen finished talking, Lelouch tried to use his geass on her a second time, while saying, "By the way, don't notice that Zero and I have the same voice."

Kallen glared at him and replied, "Hey, you've brought up an interesting point. You and Zero sound extremely similar."

Lelouch tried to use his geass on her again, while saying, "Forget you heard that."

Kallen replied, "Don't boss me around."

Lelouch started walking away, while whispering, "The geass can only be used once, per person. That won't be a problem, as long as each villain is a one-hit wonder."

Kallen also started walking away, while whispering, "That Lelouch guy is probably Zero."

After school, Lelouch and Kallen went into the Student Council room and saw the students partying. Kallen looked worn-out, while asking, "What's going on?"

Milly hopped around the room, while saying, "We're having a party, to celebrate you joining the Student Council."

Kallen replied, "That's not necessary, but I appreciate the sentiment." Milly and Rivalz barely paid attention to her, while they goofed around.

Rivalz got out a bottle of champagne and said, "Let's all have a drink."

Shirley looked concerned, while replying, "Rivalz, we're not old enough for that crap. Put the bottle away."

Rivalz responded, "Nah, if I'm going to be a useless character, I might as well be a pest."

Lelouch took the bottle away from Rivalz, while not realizing the cork had been taken off. He tried to look prim and proper, while saying, "Since you kids are so lacking in the maturity department, I'll dispose of this nasty bottle." He looked down and realized that he accidentally poured the entire bottle on Kallen. He nervously laughed and said, "My apologies."

A few minutes later, Kallen was taking a shower, to get the champagne off of her. Lelouch was hoping he could talk to Kallen and convince her he's not Zero. He opened the door, while carrying a stack of clothes, and said, "I have some clean clothes for you, when you're ready. By the way, I'm not Zero."

Kallen hid behind the shower curtain, while saying, "Get out of here."

Lelouch stood around, while saying, "Hold on, Ms. Stadtfeld. You were under the assumption that I'm Zero, during our previous conversation." He grabbed the bathroom's phone and said, "How about I call Zero, so you'll believe that he and I aren't the same person?"

Kallen asked, "How about I'll believe you, if you just get out and leave me alone?"

Lelouch thought that would take less time, so he said, "Okay then. By the way, you have pretty hair."

Kallen angrily replied, "You're going to have a black eye, if you don't get out."

Lelouch responded, "Okay then." He ran out.

After Lelouch was gone, Kallen said, "There's no way he could be Zero. He's too clueless and immature."

Meanwhile, Guilford, Princess Cornelia's knight and a frequent member of the friendship-zone, walked up to Cornelia and said "My waifu." He paused and nervously said, "Your majesty, Prince Clovis has been shot."

Cornelia replied, "That's sad and all, but do you know what this means?" Guilford shrugged her shoulders. Cornelia smirked and said, "This means I can become the main villain." She did an evil laugh.