Alternate Universe. Setting: The "After-Life", so to speak.
Pairings (Not the biggest part of the story... yet): Kakuzu x Hidan, Kisame x Itachi, Sasori x Deidara, Zetsu x Tobi.
Warnings: Slight Gore, Profanities. (It's Kakuzu and Hidan, peoples. HIDAN)
A man of twenty-two scowled, wrenching open his apartment door. His nineteen year old roommate looked up from the couch where he was painting his nails, blue eyes alight with curiosity. The bathroom door slammed shut behind the gray-haired man and the blond sighed, returning back to his nails. He could be patient and wait for an explanation. Even if it will never come...
Inside the bathroom, the man scowled in the mirror, magenta eyes looking back at him. He grabbed his pocket knife and brought it to his wrists. He made a small cut and used blood to draw a symbol, matching the rosary around his neck, on the mirror. He muttered a prayer under his breath and continued to cut himself, cursing when the blade went deeper than intended. He made a motion to shout to his roommate but the teen had gone out for groceries.
The man fell to the floor, clutching his bleeding wrist, trying to make it stop. His world began to fade to black just as the front door to the apartment opened. However it was a large, heavily cloaked man that entered, carefully shutting and re-locking the door behind him. He headed straight to the bathroom and stood over the bleeding man. He glanced at a nearby clock and waited for a bit before crouching down, feeling for a pulse.
There was none and the man stood staring right into wide, startled magenta eyes. The man looked at his corpse and started shouting profanities. The other man was ignored and watched the other throw a tantrum. He saw the symbol on the mirror and scoffed. This got the other to stop and glare at the other.
"Who the fuck are you and what the hell are you doing in my bathroom?" He snapped.
"I was waiting for you to die... Is that really the first thing you intended to ask upon dying? Most unusual. Most ask if they are indeed dead..." He mused with slight amusement.
"Tch. Staring at my corpse is enough to tell me I'm dead, bastard."
"Stop swearing." The other growled.
"Fuck no. This is my house and I can do as I please." He retorted.
"... You just killed yourself. You know this, right?" The man arched an eyebrow. "I really hate suicidal morons." He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.
"Hey I'll have you know this was an-"
"Hidan!" Both of the men started as the roommate's voice called out. He had seen the blood pooled at the bathroom door—far more than usual.
"Shit..." The paler male slapped his face. "Now he comes."
"Let's go. Out the window." The larger shoved Hidan to the window and out of it.
"Hidan!" Hidan winced as he hit the ground and heard his friend's agonized cry.
"See what you did, dumb shit?" The stranger landed besides him—only on his feet, not his face. "You just hurt someone who cared about you."
"I told you; It. Was. An. Accident." He enunciated, rubbing his nose, confused as to why it hurt so much if he was dead.
"Either way, you are truly an idiot." He snorted.
"Oi! Just who the fuck are you anyways, bastard?" Hidan snapped.
"My name is Kakuzu and I am a... reaper... of sorts." He replied. "I am supposed to guide people to their destination after they die. If they refuse, I kill them." He shrugged. "Now come with me."
Hidan frowned and wanted to protest but after a moment's thought, he shrugged and followed Kakuzu to a run down and abandoned apartment building that was down the street from his apartment. He wrinkled his nose in distaste but Kakuzu walked right in, giving Hidan no choice but to go in as well. He was immensely shocked to find the inside resembled a hotel lobby of sorts. There were two long lines, of what Hidan assumed were the dead like himself, leading to two elevators. Kakuzu ignored these and headed for the desk where a blue-haired woman with a paper rose fastened in it was sitting.
The reaper motioned for Hidan to wait and went to the desk, signing the clipboard offered to him. An envelope floated onto the desk the moment he was finished and she handed it to him after eying Hidan. Kakuzu dipped his head to the woman in respect and then motioned Hidan to follow him. They went to stairs rather than elevators, something that aggravated Hidan. Especially since they had to climb to the fifth floor. He was exhausted by the time Kakuzu stepped up to the door, revealing the entire floor to be the house. On a rugged sofa, two masked creatures were waiting—they looked like cats.
"You'll want to get behind me." Kakuzu grumbled as a dog's bark sounded.
"It's just a—what the fuck is that?" Hidan jumped when three masked, dog-like creatures appeared.
"These are my pet hell-hounds." He replied, crouching to pet them. "They hate people—especially dead ones."
"You're an exception?" Hidan scoffed.
"Yes. I pretty much gave birth to them." He replied. "Naturally, the ruler of the Underworld is an exception as well."
"You mean there is a hell?" Hidan grinned.
"Hmph. I'm an atheist, kid." Kakuzu scoffed.
"Jashinist and I am not a kid." He huffed.
"You are to me. Your room in next to mine." He pointed out a door and sent the dogs away.
He led Hidan to the room and told him to rest and that tomorrow would be busy. Hidan nodded, still wondering why he needed to sleep if he was dead. After Hidan had gone inside his room, Kakuzu had vanished into his own. The room was dark with only a bed, desk, shelf, and closet. The blanket on the bed was black decorated with red clouds outlined with white. He crawled under them after a long yawn. Moments later, the two feline-like creatures—hell-cats, he assumed—curled up beside him.
Hidan woke up late in the afternoon the next day after two weights lay on him. He gasped for breath, yelped, and shoved the two hounds off of him. Not before one licked him though. Hidan scowled, furiously wiping his face. He heard Kakuzu's voice coming from the living room where the three beasts were heading. He followed after a little hesitation and saw his new roommate was talking with a large, ugly man with a hunched back.
"Damnit. That bitch is still sleeping." Kakuzu growled. "He's going to be dead by tomorrow."
"Now, now, Kakuzu. No need to jinx him." The man drawled. "Konan said he had potential."
"That's what she said about my last five partners." Kakuzu snorted.
"I thought you had eight!" Another male sounded from the kitchen.
"Only five had potential." Kakuzu corrected.
"Oi, what the fuck is going on and who is that?" Hidan decided to make his presence known and the dogs sat at his heels.
"About time you wake up, Hidan." The tan man rolled his eyes and turned to the hunched man. "This is Sasori, another reaper. The one in the kitchen is Kisame... also a reaper." He explained as a blue man showed himself.
"Hey shrimp." He grinned, revealing sharp teeth. "I feel sorry for you, getting stuck with Kakuzu for a master."
"'Master'?" Hidan echoed.
"Don't listen to that idiot." Kakuzu glowered at the man. "As of today, you will be my assistant—my partner."
"Assist with what? Killing people and leading their poor heathen souls or whatever?" Hidan inquired.
"Pretty much." He replied, leading everyone to the kitchen table. "Time to explain a few things." He played with his food. "As reapers, we have special powers after death. In exchange, we are given a new life. We can die if we aren't careful."
"But-"
"Only by other spirits or souls though. There's also the hell beasts I have—they can kill you. There are lots of other creature that prey on souls too. That's why we're here." Kakuzu pet his hell hound.
"We have to guide them safely to those elevators down there." Kisame added.
"Where do they lead?" Hidan inquired, surprised at how good the food was.
"You haven't figured it out yet? One leads up and the other leads down." Sasori said.
"You mean heaven and hell?"
"The Lower-world and the Upper-world." Kakuzu corrected. "Those are their common names for reapers so as not to offend atheists or zealots."
"Don't see how it would or wouldn't offend." Hidan scoffed. "Anyways... you mentioned something about special powers..."
"Yeah. Sasori is able to control things and the living. He can even communicate with them through his puppets and pose as a live being." He explained. "Kisame is extremely strong and has high endurance. He's also an exquisite swordsman and specializes in water-related deaths."
"What about you?" Hidan asked.
"Aside from being able to create and control hell-beasts?" He held up his arm and pulled up his sleeve to reveal twin black tattooed bands and a scar all the way around his arm—threads leaked from the cut and writhed of their own accord.
"Cool." He grinned, reaching over the table to touch them, only for Kakuzu to retreat. "What about me?"
"We're going to find that out on today's mission." He said, glancing up at the clock. "Shit. We're gonna be late. You two, out." He stood and shooed his friends out, dogs nipping at their heels.
"Hey Kakuzu... can I feed them table scraps?" Hidan asked as the hell-cats gathered at his seat. Two of the dogs followed their example.
"Yeah, I do it all the time to avoid wasting food." He replied with a shrug, leading the third dog to the kitchen. It wore the mask that most resembled a human. "Believe it or not, money is actually needed even after death. Something I am grateful for."
"Tch. Money breeds corruption and death..." Hidan grumbled, feeding the four pets that approached him.
"Yet it never dies." Kakuzu replied, pulling on his shoes.
"It never lives either." Hidan retorted, accepting a cloak offered to him—it matched his bed.
"Touche."
–
Hidan followed Kakuzu back down the stairs, wishing they could use an elevator. They stopped at the woman's desk and Kakuzu introduced her as Konan, one of the gods' personal secretaries. She is often referred to as the paper angel for this. She handed them an envelope with their mission details and they were off. They roamed the streets and Hidan paused outside his old apartment, looking up at his window. He could not locate his window by the time Kakuzu noticed and pulled him away.
After a brief scolding, they were back on track and headed straight for a temple on the outskirts of the city. Hidan scowled, cursing about heathens as they approached the temple. Kakuzu felt his eye twitch and lashed out without warning, startling Hidan whom intercepted just as easily. Kakuzu's eyes widened but he said nothing, returning to a casual stance.
"What the hell Kakuzu?" Hidan snapped, pointing a finger in accusation.
"You were getting on my nerves. Do you ever shut up?" Kakuzu growled, pinching the bridge of his nose.
"Bastard! You don't just attack me because I'm talking!" Hidan whined.
"Well you blocked. Now shut up." They reached the temple doors and Hidan fell silent. "We're looking for Monk Chiriku."
"That bald monk back there." Hidan pointed their target out. "He's pretty high in the rankings." He noted.
Kakuzu nodded and led Hidan to the man. They waited for him to start coughing and Kakuzu explained he was having a heart attack. The others panicked and ran to call for help. Kakuzu beckoned for Hidan to crouch with him by the body and checked his pulse. It was very faint and he cursed.
"Still alive. We'll have to do the job before the living take him from us."
"Eh? I thought we just had to lead their souls back home or whatever." Hidan scowled.
"No, if they aren't willing to die and we happen to be around, we're allowed to crush their will to live." Kakuzu explained. "After all, monk souls are pretty high on the black market..." He coughed and backtracked. "I mean... Religion is pretty crucial after death—very valuable. Konan will be pleased."
"... So how are you gonna kill him?" Hidan inquired.
"I'm not... you are." He replied, stepping back. "You wanted to find out your abilities."
Hidan was about to protest but he was reminded of their short time span as he heard more living stir. He looked at the man hard and long until he felt a sudden weight in his inner cloak pocket. He reached for the object and withdrew a cylinder that revealed itself to be a retractable pike when he tilted it. He glanced back at Kakuzu but the man was eying him with a mask of indifference. He was just as stumped as Hidan.
"Do the ritual, child." A voice echoed in his head.
Hidan immediately identified him as his deity, Jashin and obeyed. He stabbed himself, hearing Kakuzu make a small sound of protest. He ignored it and let his blood drip, creating the symbol. He paused then recalled a part of the scripture. The story of Jashin's prized disciple, the details of the ritual which he had studied on lonely nights. He took the pike and drew blood from the victim, licking it. Both were shocked when his skin turned black save skeletal markings. Hidan shook his head and experimented, stabbing his leg.
"What the fuck are you doing, idiot!" Kakuzu exclaimed as a pained cry came from the monk and his 'assistant'.
"Fuck. It feels good to hear him cry." Hidan moaned, making Kakuzu take a step back.
Kakuzu watched in amazement as Hidan stabbed himself again in the arm. More cries of pain and pleasure. Hidan paused to watch Chiriku's face, contorted in pain. He then held the tip of his weapon to his heart and started to push. Kakuzu rushed forward just as the tip appeared through Hidan's back. Kakuzu cursed as he fell to his knees and rolled onto his back, clasping his hands together in a silent prayer. Kakuzu was shocked as the monk's soul began to appear, slowly being pulled from his body from the painfully slow death.
Once the soul was out, Kakuzu approached him, waiting for it to sink in that he was dead. He had a look of horror and stared down at his somewhat translucent body. He glanced back at his partner to find him unconscious. He cursed and then walked over to him, nudging his side with his toes.
"Fuck off, I'm praying." Hidan grumbled, eyes still closed.
"You're already dead. No need to pray. You are where you are and apparently you'll stay since you're immortal." Kakuzu replied in agitation. "Now get your lazy ass up and help me with the new dead."
"Sirs, please, help!" Chiriku approached them, still with a startled expression on his face. "Am I dead?"
"Obviously." Hidan scoffed, ripping the pike out his chest with a pained cry. "Fuck... you hurt." He grinned eerily and stood at Kakuzu's side.
"W-Who are you?" The monk had been horrified further by Hidan's self-mutilation.
"No one in particular. We will be taking you to your afterlife." Kakuzu replied indifferently. "Just follow us."
"How do I know I can trust you?" He replied warily.
"You can't." He shrugged. "Although I'm sure the devil's minions would offer me a high price to take you off our hands."
"Kakuzu-?" Hidan was silenced by a quick look.
"... I'll go with you..." He sighed after awhile. "I have no idea of where else to go."
Hidan was surprised but kept silent, following the monk out of the temple as Kakuzu led the way home. Along the way, however, a group of shady figures appeared, blocking their path. Kakuzu stopped and stepped in front of the monk, cursing under his breath. Hidan's view was blocked so he walked around the others, ignoring Kakuzu's warning. When the shades saw the man covered in blood, they fled, leaving Hidan to roll his eyes at Kakuzu.
They continued to the apartment in silence and Konan greeted them with a wave and smile. She handed Chiriku some paperwork and then Kakuzu signed the same clipboard from earlier. He made Hidan sign his name right beside his this time. They headed up to their floor, passing Kisame on the way. He was looking intently at a paper, not noticing their passing.
"Hm... he must be getting an assistant soon..." Kakuzu noted.
"Hm?" Hidan stopped with Kakuzu at their floor's door.
"He's been without a partner for awhile. Always scared them off..." He replied. "It was his skin and shark-like appearance that did it." He sighed.
"What about Sasori?" Hidan asked.
"... His partner... didn't work out." Kakuzu frowned and finally opened the door, letting Hidan in.
"What do you mean?" Hidan blinked.
"It's none of your business..." He grumbled, heading into the kitchen. "After dinner, we're going to bed. We'll have a mission or two every day, getting more as you remain in the organization."
–
Kisame sighed, watching his new partner from a chair by the hospital bed. It seemed ridiculous that he, the strong and large, should be paired with the frail and small. The boy simply lay there, gasping for breath. Every now and then, he would cough up blood. After a few more hours of watching, Kisame began to pity him and stood, raising his sword. He froze at the twenty-one year old looked straight at him. His irises, once black, were now red and Kisame knew the boy could see him.
"Please... save me..." He gasped, closing his eyes. "My brother... Sasuke... I'm sorry I couldn't protect you..."
"Hmph. You're becoming delirious, kid." Kisame scoffed before slicing through him with his large shark-skin sword. "Welcome to the after life, Itachi." He grinned sadistically upon hearing his dying gasp—the line went flat and Itachi gazed at his corpse with indifference.
"It is about time I passed on."
–
Kakuzu laid back on his bed, his three pets laying with him, acting as a chilling heater. His top dog—the alpha—rested its head in his lap, wagging his tail as Kakuzu absentmindedly stroked his head. Soon the hound growled, glaring at the door as Hidan appeared, growling back at the hound. Kakuzu snapped his fingers and the dog lunged. Hidan dodged, locking it out of the room with a curse.
"What do you want, Hidan?" He grumbled.
"Sasori wanted us to accompany him today... said something about treating us to some fucking dinner." He shrugged.
"Probably needs to find his new partner." Kakuzu sighed. "One thing's for certain... I hope his partner is better then that damned Uchiha."
"He's not that bad if you ignore him. Besides," Hidan grinned widely, "he makes Kisame happy."
"You have a point." Kakuzu nodded, closing his book and sending his pets to the floor.
He led Hidan out of his room, making his pets heel. Not that it was necessary as the felines twined themselves around his roommate's legs. It impressed him how Hidan, the small idiot, could tame his hell beasts. Never before had they warmed up to anyone besides Kakuzu as Kakuzu warmed up to no one. They were connected—he and the beasts. He was brought from his thoughts as they passed Kisame and Itachi on the steps. The quiet boy glanced right past them, indifferent as always. Then, Kisame tripped slightly. Soon the young raven was giggling, offering his hand to the shark-like reaper. He smiled sharply and got to his feet, blushing and rubbing the back of his head. Itachi's expression returned to one of indifference and he led his blue partner to their home on the fourth floor.
"That was..."
"Wierd..." Hidan finished Kakuzu's sentence, laughing.
"Are you talking about how Kisame's become more of a bumbling idiot since Itachi came?" Zetsu, a fellow reaper that was better at picking out future reapers, appeared from the wall, startling Hidan to cling to Kakuzu. "Kisame is a kind man. Don't be mean." His other personality added.
"What do you want, Zetsu?" Kakuzu inquired.
"Just wanted to say hi. When was the last time you walked your beasts? They're real rowdy lately..." He grumbled.
"That's cause this fucker keeps sicking that damned 'alpha' on me!" Hidan snapped. "Then Raikou and Houka jump in and fight off Yochi and then Mizu and Uindo, the poor darlings, take cover in my room!" He whined.
"... You named those beasts? Kakuzu let you name them?" Zetsu gaped.
"Shut up. Don't you have a recruit to be training?" Kakuzu grouched.
Zetsu rolled his eyes and then sank into the floor. The duo continued their trek to the third floor where Sasori was waiting, toying with one of his puppets—the hunched back Hidan had met on his first day as a reaper. Sasori was a short, young looking boy with messy red hair and muddy brown eyes. He glanced up at them but continued working until finished before actually acknowledging them. He led them outside and looked around for a restaurant. Hidan was excited to see the special diner, practically skipping alongside Kakuzu. Sasori entered a rundown diner and Hidan froze just at the door. Kakuzu stopped, looking at him in curiosity.
"D-Deidara works here..." He uttered.
Kakuzu nodded in understanding, taking his hand. He assured Hidan there was no way for the blond to see them. They entered together, joining the impatient redhead at a booth in a back room. Menus appeared before them and a demonic waiter in a puff of smoke soon after. Hidan grinned at the blackened and deformed creature while the elders ordered their usual. Hidan ordered something as well once Kakuzu jabbed him in the ribs. The waiter vanished as he came and the trio sat in silence, observing their surroundings.
"My partner is going to die here soon... I have been trailing him for awhile now. I think I can trust this one. He recently lost his closest friend and still shows loyalty." Sasori closed his eyes, leaning back in his booth. "I will leave the money with you Kakuzu and if I do not return right away, please bring the food to my place." He stood and left after a nod from Kakuzu.
"Kakuzu... how did you die?" Hidan inquired once the redhead had gone into an alley.
"I was captured and tortured to death." He replied tersely.
"Why?"
"It's none of your business."
"But-"
"I said no, Hidan." He looked to Hidan, his green eyes showing a sad and remorseful expression, "I am not ready to revisit my past life. It is fading anyways."
"How long have you been here...?" Hidan asked quietly, face uncharacteristically sympathetic.
"Ninety-one years."
–
Sasori waited impatiently for his future partner to appear. He had no idea how he was to die but the location gave him a sickening idea of how. His head snapped up when a blond left through the side door and headed deeper into the alley. The long blond hair still mesmerized Sasori and he followed the 'beauty'. He could sense at least three living beings ahead, none of them giving him an easy feeling. The blond continued indifferently, wiping tears. One of the men pushed off his wall, signalling to his 'buddy' to do the same.
"Hey sweet thing. You want us to cheer you up?" The boss snickered.
"I see your boyfriend isn't here to protect you. He bite off more than he could chew?" The younger laughed, making the blond grit his teeth in anger.
"Fuck you, hm!" He screeched, throwing a punch at the younger.
In a flash he was on the ground, clutching his gut. The teen had neglected to pay attention to the leader of the duo. They closed in on him, one stepping on his back. They discussed what the blond's fate should be. His punishment. They agreed he was pretty for a boy and believed him to be gay. Sasori came to the same outcome they did and sprung forward the moment they laid a hand on the blond. Haruko was clearly visible to the living and the men backed off, disgusted by the disfigured puppet. He killed them quickly, condemning their souls to the lower world. Unfortunately, they had injured the teen before Sasori gutted them. He waited as the blond started to die painfully slow.
He quickly put an end to his suffering, unable to bear the sight. The blond's spirit drifted from its container, staring down with a horrified expression. Sasori waited a bit for his death to sink in before gently placing a hand on his shoulder. The boy flinched then spun around, dealing a punch to the redhead's chest. Sasori gasped as breath left him and held up his hands.
"Wait, wait, I am here to help you. I stopped those thugs from doing the unforgivable, you should hear me out." He said.
"... Are you also dead, hm?" He inquired.
"Yes. I am here to guide you to your final destination." He explained.
"I am not ready to go there, hm." He frowned. "Unless someone is there waiting."
"We can look up their name at the hotel. Who do you seek?"
"Fukyuu, Hidan."
–
"Hey Kakuzu, did Sasori already leave to find his partner?"
Kisame had come to visit Kakuzu and Hidan a few minutes after they had returned from their dinner. At his side was the Uchiha, leaning tiredly on his partner on the couch. Kakuzu was feeding his hell hounds while Hidan played with the cats.
"Yeah. He should be back soon." Kakuzu answered, locking his dogs in the kitchen so they would not attack the guests.
"Who is his new partner? Did he say?" Itachi asked.
"No but he's probably been observing his partner for awhile before deciding." Kakuzu replied.
"Because of the Orochimaru incident?" Kisame sighed.
Kakuzu nodded, leaving the newest reapers confused. Hidan was soon easily distracted by his playmates, headed into his room. He followed them, pretending to stalk them. Kakuzu rolled his eyes at his partner's childishness but a knock at the door brought him to his feet. Kisame rubbed his sleeping partner's shoulder, kissing his forehead when no one was looking. Sasori was at the door, a hesitant blond behind him. Kakuzu let them in, closing the door once his guests reached the living room. Hidan and the cats were nowhere in sight as the newcomers went to the couch armchairs.
"You always get partnered with the chicks, huh Sasori?" Kisame laughed.
"I'm a boy, hm." The new-dead replied dully as though used to the mistake.
"He knows that. But your partner looks more like Orochimaru than you do." The older males blinked, surprised their puppeteer had mentioned his former partner's name. "Is your partner here, Kakuzu?" Sasori changed subject, looking around for the immortal.
"MREOW!"
"CRASH!"
"HISS!"
"Shit!"
"DAMNIT HIDAN!" Kakuzu roared, storming into his partner's room. "What did you break now?"
"I didn't do shit!" He whined, "It was Uindo!"
"Mew!"
The two cats darted into the living room and into the kitchen where their fellow animals were. A moment later, Hidan's head flew into the living room, landing at the blond's feet. He turned pale and let out a startled cry, jumping on Itachi as he lay innocently on the couch. Kakuzu dragged Hidan's body back from the room and picked up the detached head. Itachi shoved the other young male off of him, crawling further into Kisame's lap.
"Fucking prick, put my head back on." Hidan whined.
"Give me one good reason." He growled back.
"Because he has a guest." Sasori drawled.
"Who?" The duo echoed.
"Hi-Hidan, un?" Sasori's partner was still pale in the face, staring at his friend's head in the scarred man's hand.
"Deidara!" Hidan gaped as his head was reattached.
The moment he was able to move, he got to his feet, hugging his old roommate enthusiastically. Deidara hugged back after recovering from shock, even going as far as to cry. Hidan smiled slightly, stroking his hair, oblivious to the audience. Kakuzu inched over to Sasori, eying the two with a mixture of emotions. Sasori seemed a little miffed at the attention his handsome partner was giving to the loud mouthed zealot. Then, an alarm split through the building, startling everyone to their feet. Hidan covered his ears, going straight to Kakuzu's side at the kitchen, quieting the dogs. Deidara moved back towards Sasori, ears covered and eyes closed tight. Kisame was covering Itachi's ears, sighing with Sasori.
"What is this, hm?"
"It's an alert that there is a big meeting coming up." Zetsu answered, appearing from the floor. "You all need to head to the basement." He then vanished along with the bell.
"Who was that, hm?"
"Zetsu. Stop asking so many questions." Itachi grumbled, removing Kisame's hands from his ears.
"Ease up, Uchiha." Hidan laughed, patting Deidara's back.
"Hidan, grab the leashes and harnesses." Kakuzu demanded from the kitchen.
"Why?" He inquired, grabbing the items.
"If it's a meeting, the ruler of the lower world would want to see his babies." Kisame grinned, leading Itachi out. "See you guys there."
"Come, Deidara." Sasori added, also heading for the door.
Deidara hesitated, looking to Hidan but he was bracing himself. The hell pets rushed out, one lunging at Hidan while the others eyed him and Sasori, mouths watering. Deidara gulped then ran out the door ahead of his partner. Kakuzu quickly leashed the alpha and the other dogs, leaving Hidan to harness the felines. Hidan wiped the blood from his face and followed Kakuzu to the large underground room. At the bottom of the stairs waited Konan and a pierced man. Kakuzu dipped his head to the man as he passed, urging Hidan to do the same. They joined the others by a wall decorated with the red clouds decorating their bed. Deidara moved closer to Sasori when he saw the 'pets'.
"Hidan, hand me the cats. You need to go over there." Kakuzu whispered, holding his hand out for the harnesses.
"Why?" He asked, following Kakuzu's gaze to wear a few people were surrounding a large cloaked figure that Hidan recognized immediately. "Jashin-sama."
Hidan handed over the leashes then made his way to the wall bearing his god's symbol. None of the others were particularly religious so they remained together under the cloud. Konan and the pierced man soon joined them along with five other pierced males.
"Hidan, my faithful child, it is a shame that you had to meet your death so soon." The hooded figure purred, stroking Hidan's cheek with a grotesque hand.
"Jashin-sama, it is a pleasure and honor to serve and meet you." Hidan beamed, leaning into the hand.
"I am sure you are wondering what is going on here." He droned, pulling his hand away to point towards where his fellow reapers were. "Over there are reapers under the god, Pain. They go by the Akatsuki. You are currently one of them, no?" He explained then moved to another. "Over there are Buddhists, Christians are there, and there are Hindus. Many others of different beliefs are here... Here come the Satanists."
He motioned to a devil-like male surrounded by skeletons and hell hounds. The devil stopped at the Akatsuki, beckoning for Kakuzu. Kakuzu dipped his head and then merged into the group. His face held its usual emotionless mask, except when he passed Hidan. The pets turned their heads to Hidan and he offered a small smile. The alpha nipped at them and they fell back into place at Kakuzu's side.
"Most who die are atheists and they are given a last chance to convert. Pain takes only the best. That one that joined the Satanists was an atheist. Either way he is a heathen fool."
"He's the one I am partnered with..." Hidan murmured, slightly put off by hearing his god speak of Kakuzu in such a tone.
"Yes, and Pain planned it this way so he wouldn't kill yet another partner. You cannot be killed unless you or I allow it." He sighed. "The things that man has done gives him the highest seat under Satan. He is selfish, greedy, materialistic. A godless heathen that kills just to kill." Hidan felt a pleasant shiver run down his spine.
"Alright, welcome all to this gathering. It has been brought to attention that people are dying more slowly. We aren't as populated as we once were." A voice boomed through the room. "To top it off, there is a threat out there. Work of the lower level—but not you, Satan, that much is clear. The only clue is the serpent." The Akatsuki visibly tensed and Sasori's hand shot up.
"It is the work of Orochimaru, former reaper of the Akatsuki." He said.
"Snakes, along with the hell animals, are under my jurisdiction. Only he was able to control the snakes." Satan mused, glancing at Kakuzu.
"What does Orochimaru want?" Deidara shouted, surprising Hidan.
"He wants control and immortality. What else?" Sasori scoffed.
"He'll go to any lengths to achieve it." One of the Jashinists murmured.
"In order to protect both the dead and living, Orochimaru will have to be stopped." Pain shouted.
"Does anyone have plans on how? No one has been able to lure him out nor kill him." The voice that started the meeting boomed.
"I think I might have an idea. I was his partner, after all." Sasori offered. "I believe I know how to lure him out and kill him but I will need cooperation from other godly figures."
"The gods aren't meant to interfere with the reapers' fights, no matter what the threat." One god argued.
"All I will need is their best reapers... A Jashinist, and a Satanist as the bait."
"What?" Satan and Jashin shouted in unison.
"It makes sense." Pain mused, stroking his pierced chin. "A Jashinist is immortal and Satanist have strong powers of control. Orochimaru will be drawn to them as they are perfect test specimen."
"Exactly!" Sasori grinned, "And then the Akatsuki can capture and kill him. After all, he was one of us and," he paused, looking at the ground, "it's my fault he's doing all this."
"Does Satan or Jashin have any objections?" The voice inquired.
"I have no problem with it. That snake is giving me a bad name!" Satan snarled.
"And it would be bad for me if he did find the secret to immortality." Jashin mused, "It's the only way I can secure enough followers to live."
"Very well. Who do you nominate as the bait?"
"Kakuzu." Satan shouted, motioning to the stitched reaper with the unreadable expression.
"Hidan." Jashin smiled, looking to his stunned disciple and holding out his hand.
"Very well. I now end this meeting and wish you luck in destroying the menace, Orochimaru."
URGHAFHKJDGHLFG I ONLY WANTED THIS TO BE A ONESHOT!
BUT NOOOOOO! I JUST COULDN'T STOP TYPING AND ADDING THINGS!
I JUST HAD TO GIVE IT AN ACTUAL PLOT!
Urgh. I. Hate. How. I. Can't. End. Things!
Here's how it will go:
This is the beginning.
The next chapter is a background story. (Pain & Konan's)
Chapter following that will be a background story. (Kakuzu & Kisame's)
The chapter after will be a background story. (Zetsu & Tobi's)
Then after that another background story. (Sasori & Orochimaru's)
And another... (Deidara & Hidan's)
And another... (Itachi's)
And then the final of the story.
Does that sound good?
GOOD!
Also: Is anyone willing to tell me what a Beta is/does and how I can get one? Would one of you be interested?