Title: My Severus, My Love

Author: Nimohtar

Pairing: Harry/Severus

Rating: PG

Warning: Character Death

Summary: OS. CHARACTER DEATH. A dream becomes a nightmare. A nightmare has only one end.

-

I can only watch helpless as you go to your death. He has called, and like the good little Death Eater you pretend to be, you obey, come to kneel at his feet. But it is too late. He knows.

Malfoy recounts with glee what he has seen. They jeer and laugh and spit on the one they once called comrade, now branded a traitor in their eyes. You were a traitor, yes, but never to me, never to what we were.

They will punish you, make you suffer for deserting their cause. I will suffer along with you, feel your pain as if it were my own. I will writhe with you, I will cry with you, beg and scream and die with you.

My Severus, My love.

It should not have come to this.

He stands, and all fall silent as he gazes down at you, thin lips twisted into a grimace of hate. He will take pleasure from your death, just as he will take pleasure from my pain.

You struggle to your feet, your face lined with hurt, pain, and sorrow at what you cannot stop, and at what you will lose. Defiant you stand and await your sentence, your black eyes burning. You will not weep; you consider it beneath you at this time. You never said, but I know you always thought it would end like this. You just never counted on me. I always did manage to sweep away your carefully conceived plans, just as I managed to chip through the walls you surround yourself with, to protect your aching heart. I made you feel, and even now I cannot bring myself to regret any of it.

I love you.

I hear your words, whispered though they are, and my eyes fill with the tears I know you wouldn't approve of, if you could but see them.

Avada Kedavra.

The green light flashes, one that has haunted me for sixteen years, and I see you fall lifeless to the ground.

Oh Severus…

He laughs, high and cold, hissing like the snake he so much resembles, his demonic eyes glowing red in the darkness.

Inside I howl in grief; shout, swear and rage against the injustice of it all. My heart bleeds, and I scream and scream and scream.

The door to my room bursts open, bright lamps flare and flicker at the sudden intrusion of sound and flurried movement. They are all there – Remus, Dumbledore, McGonagall, Ron, Hermione… and the only one I want is you, but I've just seen you die. You are never coming back.

I can hear them talking loudly, asking questions, demanding answers that I will not give. I dress quickly in simple clothes, take my wand in my hand, and the dagger of Salazar Slytherin that you gave me on my last birthday.

I ignore them as I walk out of the room, down the stairs, into the hallway. Remus tries to stop me. I run. They give chase. What I am doing, what I am planning to do, is foolishness, but we established long ago that the Gryffindor in me far outweighed the Slytherin in you.

I Apparate with a crack as soon as I reach the gates, and land with a soft thud on dewy grass, metres from where you lie. I only spare a glance, as for the moment my mind is focussed on another.

He knew I would come, and was waiting for me. He is alone, confident that at long last he will succeed. He won't.

It is over in mere moments. He never stood a chance. It was you who taught me to channel my emotions into my magick, my power. I never knew just how strong anger, hate and grief could be.

I turn from his smoking corpse and walk back to you. Slytherin's dagger is clutched in my hand, my wand dropped to the ground, as I have no need of it any more. I have done my duty, and all I want now is rest.

It hurts briefly when the dagger slashes through my wrists, but that soon fades. I lay on my side next to you, and run a trembling and blood-soaked hand over your battered face. It wasn't meant to be like this. Heroes are meant to live happily ever after…

I remember all the times we spent together as my body goes cold and my mind begins to drift.

Your face is the last thing I see.

Oh Severus, my love, I will be with you soon.

- FIN -

Words: 761

24.05.06