sooner or later it comes to down to faith

The Virtue AU no one asked for.

There was a prompt on the old Misfits kink meme asking for a virtue AU in which Nathan got turned. ( . ?thread=187414)

Then I did some overly long meta in which I really wanted to see Alisha slashed (and got super smug when I read the script book after and found out they cut a scene in which Alisha thinks Sally the probation worker's hitting on her.)

So it became an Alisha/Rachel (implied - hdu, Virtue are chaste as the day is long, or something) fic, with some minor Nathan/Simon.

Chapter Management

hapter Text

So...the power thing works on girls.

She saw a few girls staring at her at the clubs, guessed she must have brushed past them or up against their boyfriends, but she's not bothered about it, to be honest.

When she was at school, all the girls wanted to be her friend anyway, so they could meet the older guys who used to stare at her.
Chloe and Lucy used to compete over who brushed out Alisha's hair, or put on her makeup for her, who got to sleep top-tails with her and who got the twin bed, who sat shotgun in her car.

Chloe's kissed her a few times, mostly when they want to particularly impress the boys, like the drinks are really overpriced or her dad's taken the car away, but then Chloe nearly fucked her brother, so she's not exactly choosy.

The weird parole officer tried giving her her number, telling her how pretty she was, to call any time if she needed to talk.
Alisha doesn't know if it's down to the powers or she's just a lezzy, but she's not willing to take the risk finding out.

She doesn't throw the number away, though. She might not be able to persuade a copper not to press charges, but there's no point in pissing off someone who's in charge of how long she has to spend picking up dogshit and cleaning sewers. Maybe she can at least get off a few days for period pains or something, maybe even some tears over the nasty policeman and his truncheon.

She texts Sally a few times, nothing big - once is to pick her up after she throws up in the cab, another on Simon, of all people's suggestion, telling her about some crazy policeman.
She doesn't know how the little freak even knew Sally had was her number.

He's the one who's been sucking up to her, anyway, he was in her office twice as long as anyone else.
She thought maybe he was just being creepy - he seems like the type who'd get off on having a mummy figure there to spoil him, but he tells her he has an idea he wants to investigate - puts it just like that, as if he's Inspector fucking Morse, probably with a pair of knickers in the briefcase instead of a magnifying glass.

So she does her best sobbing and catapults into Sally's twiggy little arms for their interview, snotting all over her cardigan about this scary cop in the club the other night who got a bit rough checking her ankle bracelet.
In her mind she's picturing the prick who caught her with a wrap a few months back, the one who seems to think he's going to bring down Thamesmead's answer to Scarface or something, instead of just being a twat with a badge.

She describes him, and Sally takes unexpected interest, asking for details. 'Was he talking to anyone?'

'I dunno', Alisha stalls.

She doesn't know what Simon's up to, but if he won't share his master plan, she's always been good at improvisation.

'He was talking to a big bloke, grey t-shirt. He was in his civvies, so I didn't know til he showed me his badge who he even was!'

She ends the last syllable on a whine for no other reason than drama, this is already getting boring.

Sally's more rapt than ever, though, so Simon should be happy, she's already been in here half an hour. 'Did you get his name?'

'Yeah, Pete Josephs. Detective Pete.'

She's had it for now, a bit fucked off with Sally for so obviously pumping her, forgetting for a moment that her story was fake. So she tells her that Nathan needs to speak to her.

This naturally dominates the rest of the day, leaving her and Curtis an afternoon in the stock cupboard.

It's alright. Curtis checks himself out as much as her, but she gets that. Sometimes she gets off more afterwards, thinking about it, then when it's happening. The more blokes you fuck, the more you realise how few blokes can fuck well.
Now she's not fucking anyone, she doesn't miss the sex as much as she'd thought, but she feels a bit sad sometimes after wanking.

She was always good at it, even taught Chloe where the clit was, but she does miss the non-coming parts of sex - slow tongues sliding against each other. Her arse being grabbed. Sometimes even her neck being kissed, which is so pathetic.

At leaving time, Simon's rematerialised, perched quietly on the locker room bench eating a sandwich, like some sort of gnome. Kelly's still pissed off about Jodie. Nathan's smug, watching Sally's car tear out as if her house is burning down.

'I almost feel sorry for her', mutters Curtis. 'Can you imagine having to help that prick?'

'Hey!' interjects Nathan, who has some kind of attention whore radar behind his stupid hair. 'I just made some serious progress, man, scraping the depths of my soul! This is why she got into this job!'

'You told her you got touched up, didn't you?' Alisha says tiredly.

Nathan rolls his eyes. 'I'm not that predictable.'

Even Simon raises a sceptical eyebrow.

'Okay, fine, but the classics are hard to beat for a reason, she'll be all day on the paperwork alone! That's an official disclosure, it'll cunt up at least the next 48 hours. You're just lucky I didn't tell her about you, Barry, you've definitely victimised my poor anus.'

Curtis looks horrified, but Simon seems less moody than a few weeks ago. He gives a fairly good attempt at a sneer, but doesn't allow Nathan to start showing off like usual, clearly intent on telling them something.

'We need to be careful what we say to Sally. I went to her house today.'

'Alright, weird kid!' Nathan cheers. 'Did you sniff her knickers? That's like, half way to popping your cherry, now you've just gotta do it when she's in them!'

'Shut up, alright? Fook!' explodes Kelly. 'I just failed my restorative justice thing, they could give me another six weeks here! This is serious, if she knows about Tony, we could be fooked! The flyover's only been up a week, they could still be looking for him!'

'He was dating Sally. Tony, I mean. They were together. At her house I found photos of them. That's why she's been hanging around here, trying to get us to trust her. She knows we had something to do with it.'

Shy Simon finally has all the attention in the room.

'Someone was instant messaging me on my computer. It started after we...after Tony. She's got Alisha's number. All our addresses. And she's friends with a policeman. He'd left a message on her machine.'

Everyone suddenly explodes into chatter. 'She's got your number?' asks Curtis.

Alisha questions his priorities, a little, personally. He'd alright in the nick, people know his name, but there's no way she's being some bull dyke's lipstick lover, which is a lot more pressing than who's got her number, which, by the way, is hardly a state secret.

'She wanted to talk to me, if she thinks I'm her little friend like him, she could let me out early or something!'

'What did you tell her, Alisha?' Simon asks in his serious way, intensely eyeballing her like some kind of tropical fish.

'Nothing! I just said I saw that twat, Detective Josephs, talking to someone at the club.'

'Someone who? A man or a woman?'

'A man! Just a bloke, I kept thinking about that twat', she nods her head in Nathan's direction, 'saying Tony ran off with Gary.'

'Maybe the cop's banging Tony!' Nathan suggests excitedly. 'Love across the divide, behind everyone's backs!'

'Tony's the dead one, you fucktard! And I didn't tell her they were fucking, I just said Pete was talking to a bloke who looked like Tony.'

Simon looks thoughtful.