Author's Note/Disclaimer: I have been meaning to write this story ever since I wrote "The Gift of a Nightmare" years ago as one of several TNBC Christmas parodies. I didn't get around to it until recent interest in the idea (and some odd inspiration) got me going again. I'd like to thank the people that voted on my profile poll for this story. For the umpteenth time, I do not own "The Nightmare Before Christmas" or any characters from the amazing film. Thank you, happy holidays, and enjoy this tale as it unfolds!
*S. Snowflake
It's a Wonderful Nightmare
Part One: The Unluckiest Halloween
A long time ago in the land of Halloween, a curious thing occurred. The wind howled strangely one Halloween, and on that day the town was in a fuss. Out of sheer bad luck, the celebrations for all the monsters' and ghouls' hard work of thrills and chills were not going well, and all the creatures turned to their king to solve the problems.
"Jack! Jack!" croaked a group of ghosts to the skeleton king, "We've lost our voices and can't go 'boo!'"
"Then please, drink some specter tea and try to not shriek until nightfall," Jack, the tired Pumpkin King said, trying to be kind.
"Listen, Jack!" pleaded the mayor, "The haunted acrobats can't find their equipment, and they're the opening act!"
"I know, Mayor, I know," Jack answered before he lifted a large jack-o-lantern, placed it in its proper spot on the town fence and ignited the flame inside it with his Pumpkin King magic. "Just keep looking around and we'll find another opening act for tonight's festival."
The Mayor's mechanically moving head spun around as he thought about whether Jack's idea was a good or bad one. At last, he settled on the unhappy face. "But Jack, there's nothing like that show in the lineup!"
Jack tried his best to be friendly, but with all the dysfunction of the day, he was quite an upset king. "Then please, try to find something. I…I don't know what to do."
The Mayor nodded and hopped in his car. Poor Jack thought he was off the hook before he heard the two-faced Mayor cry out, "Attention everyone, Jack doesn't know what to do for Halloween! I repeat, Jack-has-no-idea what to do!"
Jack sighed and returned to his duties. Thank you, Mayor. What would I ever do without you? he thought to himself.
A few more ghouls asked Jack questions. The witches inquired if he had more toadstools for their toxic celebration brew, and Jack had to explain that the town had a shortage of them. A flock of bats had escaped from the vampires' home, and Jack had to rally a bat search team to find them all. Behemoth needed someone to help cart the huge Pumpkin into town, and with the bat party out, only Jack was around to do so. The poor king, now nearly into the next life from carrying the huge squash, was still pestered by monsters asking him questions about the celebration.
"Jack?" a soft voice greeted him from behind after a few more ghouls had spoken to him.
"What? What? I'm very busy!" Jack shrieked, not realizing that the voice belonged to his fiancée, Sally, until he turned around.
Sally's wide, rag doll eyes sunk a little as he snapped at her. "Oh…I'm sorry, Jack. I thought I might ask you how my scare-stare has improved for tonight."
Sally was not a very scary monster at all. Jack had been teaching her some new tricks and treats since they became a couple, but her big, sweet eyes and lovely red hair made her more beautiful than frightening.
"Sally, I told you that you're terrifying. Now please leave me be. I'm having a lot of trouble right now," Jack said with exasperation.
"I knew that too," she said.
"Oh really? Was it the Mayor's announcement?" Jack asked, trying to hide his irritation with the Mayor.
"Well, yes, but I also could just tell," she said.
Jack understood then. Sometimes Sally could sense things that no one else could, and she certainly knew him well–in some ways better than he knew himself. Occasionally it was almost unnerving how well she knew him.
"Please Sally," Jack said, "I'd rather figure this out for myself. We can meet up again after the celebration."
Sally frowned, her hopes that Jack might spend more time with her completely crushed. "Oh. All right, love. But if you need me, I'll be around."
Jack nodded and continued working on decorating the town square. He and a squad of citizens set out haystacks and harvest décor. Jack planned for his act to set one haystack aflame, though the lucky haystack had accidentally fallen into the dark lagoon and wouldn't ignite. It seemed as if nothing was going right this Halloween.
Then Lock, Shock, and Barrel, the top trick-or-treaters in town, knocked into a pillar of pumpkins inside a wagon. Barrel tried to stabilize the squash tower, but all the pumpkins crashed down anyway, sending shells, fast rolling pumpkins, and orange goo everywhere. Jack finally lost his temper when he took in the damages. His stern, skeleton expression terrified the trick-or-treaters as well as the citizens of Halloween that were watching the scene.
"And just what did you think you were doing parading into town before the show had started?" Jack hollered at the trio. "Don't you realize that we're trying to put on a holiday here?"
"W-we're sorry, Jack," Lock said.
"We just wanted to get ready for tonight," said Shock.
"-I-it was an accident," Barrel stuttered.
"That accident could have been prevented if you three had just been a bit more careful," Jack reprimanded. "This Halloween has been difficult enough as it is. I don't need you three around to make it worse!"
Some of the citizens of Halloween muttered amongst themselves at Jack's outburst. No one really liked the three tricksters Lock, Shock, and Barrel, but Jack was being downright harsh on them. Usually the king was such a pleasant ghoul, but right now he was certainly not acting his boney self. They hoped that he wasn't about to scare the kids too badly.
"Wait a minute, Jack," a voice said in the crowd before Sally emerged.
The ghouls smiled, for if anyone could help Jack, it was Sally.
"Jack, please don't punish them like this," she pleaded. "They didn't mean it."
Jack turned around to her, anger written all over his skull. "You know how they are, Sally. And besides," he growled. "You should know that today's been one of the worst Halloweens I've ever–"
"It's no excuse, Jack!" Sally interrupted, her voice rising. "You've been a regular scrooge all day because of a little bad luck and all we've been doing is trying to help you."
"What's a scrooge?" the Mayor whispered for an answer.
The werewolf turned and shrugged. "-Must be a Christmas thing."
"I'm not being scrooge!" Jack yelled back. "And maybe if everyone actually helped instead of trying to help then things would go more smoothly!"
Sally no longer had patience with Jack and yelped, "You're the Pumpkin King! You have a responsibility to all of them!"
Jack pointed a boney finger to answer her, but found no words. She was right, of course, but he did not want to let her have the last word. He looked around and saw his people still staring at him expectantly, surprised to see their king and future queen–who were, by most accounts, very much in love–fighting.
"Well, I suppose there's nothing I can do about that," Jack replied and turned away from a saddened Sally. "I'm going on break for a while before I clean up this mess."
And then Jack walked out to the town gate that led to the graveyard, not once looking back at the ghoulish eyes that all watched him with sadness.
The angry Pumpkin King paced around the graveyard. Each tombstone seemed to remind him of his Halloween kingdom that he was letting down, and every ghostly sigh from the graves below brought back his guilt. Finally spent in his frustration, Jack settled down next to a large tombstone near a hemlock bush and held his skull in his skeleton hands.
"It's on days like this I wish I'd never become the Pumpkin King," he said to himself, then looked up to the sky. "I hope someone heard that! I wish I'd never been the Pumpkin King!"
Then Jack shook his head and looked to the ground again. He never expected to hear the voice he heard next.
"Ho, ho, ho! Are you sure about that, Jack?" said the jolly voice of an old man.
"Sandy Claws?" Jack asked with disbelief as he lifted his head. Sure enough, the jolly yuletide elf was standing beside him in the graveyard, looking down into his eye sockets.
"Ho, ho," Santa laughed. "Still calling me Sandy, are you?"
"I…why are you here? How did you even get here, Mr. Claws?" Jack asked.
"I heard about your trouble over in Christmas Town. And if I can fly around the human world in one night, I can certainly come to Halloween Town when I need to," Santa said, "but, Jack, you don't really want that wish to come true, now do you?"
Jack scratched the back of his skull. "I don't know, Mr. Claws. It just seems that I'm not cut out for this job. And this Halloween has been a trial."
Santa chuckled. "It's not easy to be king."
"I wish it were," Jack said, "You know, I wasn't always a king."
"Really?" asked Santa, intently.
"Yes. When I was a boy, I was just a poor pumpkin grower. I became king for being the most terrifying creature in town and for scaring off that monster Oogie." Jack frowned. "Sometimes I wish I could go back to those simple days of being the pumpkin farmer, not the Pumpkin King, again."
Santa gave Jack a curious look. "You'd want to see what Halloween Town would be like without you as their king?"
Jack laughed. "Sure, I suppose. I'll bet they'd be better off, but I suppose there's no way to know."
Santa sighed. "Well, I might know a way to find out, but…"
Jack turned around slowly, in wonder of the idea. "You could, Mr. Claws? You could give me just one day to be the old Jack again?"
"Well, I suppose I could use some of my Christmas magic to show you, but I have to warn you, you might not like what you see," Santa said. "You know what they say. Be careful what you wish for."
"Mr. Claws, I wish–strike that, I very carefully wish that I had never been the Pumpkin King," Jack said enthusiastically.
Santa Claus sighed and removed his red cap, taking out a handful of magic Christmas snow. He blew the snowflakes into the air, sending them flying all around in a dazzling flurry of light and snowfall that made Jack have to close his eye sockets. After a few minutes, the spell stopped, and Jack slowly opened his eyes again.
"Welcome back to town," Santa's voice greeted him.