The Thing Gives Someone Strength
This is my first Degrassi fiction and please give me feedback.
Author: Chlarkrocks
Pairings: Craig/Ellie, Jimmy/Ashley, Emma/Sean, Manny/ implied Manny/Craig, implied Jesse/Ellie, implied Craig/Ashley
Craig's Pov
Here I sit in a chair with a circle of people just like me. I must get through this. I choose not be that person who screws up the people he loves life.
"So what's your name" asks the guy standing in the middle. The people around the circle had listed their name, addict title, and what makes them want to be here to fix their problem.
"Hi, I'm Craig. I'm a cocaine addict" I say standing up.
"Hi Craig" say all the people around me. It reminds me of a time when I was sitting a circle much like this and life was almost perfect. I had sworn of women, but I had the most beautiful girl sitting across from me smiling as I told the group of people about the problems in my life.
I should have never taken that first shot of coke, but I did and there is no one but me that can change that. There are a lot of a never should haves in my life some more then others. The first happened three years ago I cheated on my current girlfriend then Ashley with Manny. I can never understand why exactly, but in the end I got neither one of them. I dated both, but one broke up with me for going off my bipolar medicine. The other because I said something stupid while I was on coco and in some ways I don't regret it because maybe everything with Manny was just what Marco said a way to put off these intense feelings for Ellie, that I've always had since the beginning of that summer. In some sense Ashley pushed us together when she left on purpose because I think even though I loved her she knew that I need some that understands me better then she could. Manny wasn't that person at all in the end she helped to bring out that person that wanted to something crazy instead of the person that wants to succeed and become something, like Ellie who was the person that first pushed me to try and become a true musician and go try and get the record deal in Vancouver . I may never me the musician again, but I want to be able to go to college and be something.
"So, Craig what has motivated you to be here to fix this problem?" asks Dr. Limerick.
"Well there is this girl, who has always been there for me and she pushed me to me here and I hope some day in the future I can go back to her and tell her my true feelings" I say. I use to feel ashamed to say something like that to complete strangers, but it is the truth.
Ellie's Pov
It has been over six months since that faithful day at the airport when I told him goodbye.
Things around here have changed since then. I'm still the music critic at The Core, but now Jesse and I barely talk unless we have to. Marco and Dylan have been very supportive since then. Living with two gay guys has it advantages and disadvantages. The advantages are that you always have someone there to listen to your problems and the food is actually good, comparatively to mine.
My music critiquing was at first angry for the first month because I was in so much pain and I got angry at one of the band members of a local band because he was being so nice to me and in some ways he reminded me of Craig before everything happened. I've tried so hard to not love him, but maybe the reason is because as many problems as he has had I've had some too. We understand each other because we have had so many hardships in or live.
My life has gotten better since then even though he's gone. My mom has gotten over her alcoholism and my dad came back with lots of scars, but I've missed him since I've only seen him once since that day he left for Iraq. He helped Canada fight the war on terror and now he back to help my mother through her dilemma. He has heard about every person in my live down to Manny, who I have tired and failed to be nice to she just got that tone and being stuck up going on. Emma though is very nice and she says that eventually Manny and I can be friends. She thinks that even though she is Manny best friend, that Craig and I better for each other and I'm not sure if should take that as a compliment. She says that because as a musician I understand him better. Maybe so, but I've been trying to move on and I went on a date with one of Dylan's hockey friends, but it didn't work out because he didn't like the same kind of music I do and he criticized it along with my column in the Core.
Craig's Pov
I feel happy, but sad right now I'm going back to Joey's. He and I have talked a lot and he forgives me for the entire thing because he thinks he knows what the live of the a real rock star is the only thing he has to say that if I come back I better try to treat Ellie better because he says she would make the best daughter-in law and I just laughed, but to tell you the truth I've been thinking about it since then. Now I'm standing in front of Marco, Dylan, and Ellie's door.
"You looking for someone too?" asks a strong male voice coming from behind me.
"Yeah I'm looking for Ellie and you?" I ask turning to see a guy who looks like he could kill me if got the chance.
"You, Jesse?" he asks and finally I recognize him, he's Ellie dad, but he looks more toughed up, then in the picture I saw of him .
"No, I'm Craig, you must me Mr. Nash?" I say and gesture to shake his hand. He shakes my hand it feels like I'm losing all circulation in my arm.
"That's weird because I've heard of most of Ellie's friend and I haven't heard one word about you" he says folding his arms over her chest.
"Well, right now your daughter is really angry at me and it's possible that she may never forgive me" I say telling the honest truth.
"If I know my daughter well enough, she will forgive you if she believes you are worth the trouble" he says and god I hope she will.
"My guess is she is at the newspaper office right now typing up that prize winning article about music in its fullest" I say with a absolute certainty.
"I'm very sure of that" he says with a smile.
"I better go, can you tell her that a friend came to see here" I say and I know that right now isn't the best time to confess my love for Ellie since her dad is standing in front of me ready to spend time together with her.
"It was nice to meet you, Craig, I hope to see you again" I say with that I smile at him brightly.
The Next Day
I ended up staying with Jimmy and he told me that in the end Jesse and Ellie never got back together and he said it was lucky for me. The truth is either way if Ellie was dating Jesse or not now, I would still fight for her the same. I may be the guy that screws up, but for once in my life I feel like I can do something and I know where I'm heading with my life. When I told Ash and Jimmy what I was going to do about Ellie, Ash first asked me if I have been taking my bipolar medicine I showed her the bottle and she believed me. Jimmy asked if this was going to be way more formal then when I asked Ashley, I nodded and showed them. They both smiled at me brightly.
Now it's five a clock and I'm standing at the door of the group session that I use to go to with Ellie, she is talking away and Emma looks like she's looking intently at Ellie to try and understand her better.
I open the door and everyone, but Ellie looks towards me and some how I can tell she's trying to avoid my gaze.
Eventually she's going to have to look at me.
"Sorry I am late" I say apologizing to the Dr. Kenrich.
"It's okay Craig it's nice to see you again" says Dr. Kenrich sitting down in his chair.
"As soon as Ellie is done telling about her week you can go and tell us what you have been up to" he says and then everyone turns to look at her.
"Well as I was saying I interview five different local bands with all different sounds, I realize that the bands show their passion for music in such different ways, but none the less it's music" Ellie says eyes looking around the room at everyone.
"Ellie tell us how have you been since your dad came back?" asks Dr. Kenrich looking her straight in the eye.
"Well, life has felt almost like it has gone back to normal since then because my mother is out of rehab and is doing better. I haven't felt the need to snap any of my rubber bands which is a good sign" she says and smiles softly.
"So Craig what have you been up to since I heard you left for Vancouver like a year ago?" asks Dr. Kenrich.
"Well, I finished my demo about six months ago and I came back to Toronto, I was a mess, I had started sniffing coke, I didn't realize that my life was a mess" I say and gulp so I can continue.
"This mess you describe that you life in what exactly do you mean?" asks the doctor in his therapist way.
"Well first of all everything I said and did revolved around that stupid drug and I let myself believe I was in love with one girl when in reality I've been in love with the other since we first became real friends" I say and finally Ellie looks up at me, but only for a moment.
"So what are you going to do to fix the mistake that most people make?" he asks looking over his glasses.
"By doing this" I say standing up and walking over to Ellie. She looks me in the eye and I feel loved and I hope to make her feel that way. I get down on one knee and Ellie's face looks more surprised then when Leo told us he wanted to manage us.
"Ellie Nash, you have been there for me since the moment Ashley left for London and you've brought me down from the dumps up to the highest point in my life. I've loved you longer then I would be willing to admit, but now I want to be able to show everyone that you're the woman that I love. I know I've messed up in the past and I hope I can make it up to you. I got a call from Leo saying that he decided to have me record the rest of my album here so I can be close to family and go to school. Make me the happiest man and marry me?" I ask pulling out the jewelry box. Ellie eyes fill with tears as I finish and I want to wipe those tears away.
"Yes, Craig I'll marry you" she quietly as if unsure.
"yeah" I say looking into her eyes and smiles a bright smile. I pulled her into my arms and spin her around. I couldn't be happier right now if I tried.
The End
I was thinking about writing a sequel, tell me if I should.