A/N: (for Natty) I changed my mind about this being a Oneshot! I had too much fun writing this! (for the rest) …enjoy!xD

Bryan Down Under

Prologue

"My child…" began the Grand High Lord, whos name was so sacred even the very demons he ruled over were forbidden to speak it. "I have called you from the upper world for a special reason."

Sanguinex stared at the pitch black floor, bit his lip and shifted a smidgen. Being summoned by his King was never a comfortable experience.

"As you are now of age," continued the great man. "The time has come for me to pass on to you a family heirloom."

He gave the undead redhead a curious iron key.

"W-what is it, sire?" Sanguinex asked timidly.

"That!" was the booming reply. "…holds the answer to the meanings you seek."

The teen stared at the unlikely object with an elegantly raised eyebrow. The Grand High Lord saw this and chuckled deeply.

"I know it may not be much," he added in a low, more fatherly tone. "But the thing works every time. Through the years it's been in this family, it has never let us down…"

"Uh…thank you…" the redhead replied.

"Use it well and keep it safe!"

Sanguinex shrugged. "I will if you say so, your Highness…don't worry." He smiled politely at the man before bowing low and leaving.

--

"It's a rite Bryan…"

"I won't do it!"

"Keep his legs apart Tala!"

"I'm trying to Kai!"

"I said I'm NOT DOING IT!"

Their tangy-haired team captain sighed and put his hands on his hips. "Look Bry, Kai 'n I are on Boris' orders. Voltaire sent a memo that says…" he fished out a sheet of paper from his pocket and read it for reference. "…and I quote 'My boys, tis tradition that every fair-haired maiden must become a disciple of the moon. Since I have no maidens and Kuznetsov is the only worth fair-haired individual, he shall have to suffice. Service to the moon requires wearing this chastity belt to preserve virginity…' so stay put and we'll strap it on!"

"NO!"

"Fine…" said Kai. "Give me a good reason…"

"…it'll hurt…"

The bluenette groaned. "You can do better than that…"

"…Alright…HOW ON EARTH WILL I PEE?!"

"That's YOUR problem!" exclaimed Tala, heaving the thick iron brief on the table where Bryan was. "Come ON! Let's get little Jimmy in this thing…"

"It'll just be like putting on permanent diapers!" the redhead's best friend cooed as his slipped a valiantly struggling teen into the contraption.

With a heavy click, the steel underwear was on.

"Wait," added Tala and he secured everything with a big iron padlock. "Says in the memo if you want to leave the moon's service, you have to be deflowered in her presence by your one true…and the ink got smudged."

"Are you snug?" Kai asked the lilac-haired Russian.

"Go to Hell…" was the snarling reply as he tried to stand and almost fell over at the belt's weight. "Godamnnit, how much does this thing weigh?!"

"Less than a ton, I suppose…" the bluenette answered.

"Now this is supposed to be a secret," Tala interrupted before blood was shed as he was seemingly engrossed in the given instructions.

"Not anymore by the racket we made…" muttered Bryan.

"…you mean by the racket YOU made," corrected Kai cheerfully.

"HIWATARI!"

"OI! You two shut UP!" their team captain yelped. "Let's just walk out here like nothing happened or else the Bosses are gonna get my ass!"

"Better your ass than mine…"

"KUZNETSOV!"

It was kind of hard to walk exactly when you were wearing underwear heavier than you.

TBC

A/N: …y'all get the point when I said I had lotza fun with this…x3 don't kill me and tell me what you think! …enjoy!xD and ciAo…