Rating: M (Swearing, smut, suggested violence and abuse)
Family isn't always defined by blood and the strongest of ties can come from the most unexpected places. But could you risk losing that family when the love changes? What do you do when you find your soulmate at the age of sixteen? What if that soulmate is only nine? Sometimes all you can do…is take your time. Eric/OC AU No War, No Divergents
A/N: This entire thing was literally written in a fever delirium and on strong cold meds. Apparently my smut levels rise when I am delirious.
Achievement unlocked: Smut
Level Advanced to: A Little Less Of A Rank Novice from Rank Novice
Perk Gained: Only 75% Chance of head exploding when reading or writing smut.
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ERIC
Eric
Eric cradled the young woman closer as they huddled in the slight shelter the formation of boulders and the crag in the rocks provided from the blizzard raging around them. If he could mentally will warmth into her he would will it all, every single ounce he had. He would gladly give it all.
"We got the call in. Help will be coming soon." He murmured close to her face that he had pressed to his chest. "You just have to hang in there for me, Lacey. Do you hear me? You need to stay awake." He tried to command her but it came out broken and harsh in the tears that wanted to break free.
She groaned but didn't reply. Her lips were tinged with blue and he knew she was fading. He was losing her and it was all his fucking fault. "Baby please." He got out in a harsh whisper against her skin. It was too cold to cry. Or maybe he was and the tears were just freezing to join with the rest of the frozen spots on his skin.
He rocked a little as if moving her would help to stimulate her back awake but also shake off the grief and pain that was threatening to break him. All those years, all those millions of excuses he had piled on to keep from admitting his feelings; from crossing a line with her. They were all so much shit now that he knew how much he loved her. Had loved her for longer than he realized.
He came to that realization before the storm hit. Before he made the biggest mistake of his life and let her come with him to radio for help. He had just been so fucking relieved she was ok. That when the transport had lost control and flipped over twice, she had walked away with minor scratches.
She was all he could think about when it had been happening. Sending up prayers that she be ok, thankful that he had insisted she be strapped in. Even doing the damn straps up himself. She had given him lip, then insisted if she had to be belted in that he be too.
That was how the two of them were in the best condition to make the hike to get to higher ground and make the call. There had been too much interference where the transport had ended up. The canyons and small mountains of the Amity sector they were in didn't provide the best signal. He had known they would need to get higher.
He hadn't counted on the small snowfall that was predicted would turn into a goddamn blizzard. He also hadn't counted on being slowed down. He should have known that just because she looked fine didn't mean she was fine. Something was wrong. Something had happened that hit her about halfway up that caused her to all but pass out. It had been to late to turn back and the snow had already started. He could only press on, carrying her when she couldn't walk anymore and was crying out in pain. He had done his best to remain calm, get the call out and try and find them somewhere to hunker down.
"They got the call and have our position, baby. They will get here in time." They have too, he thought, or he might as well die on this fucking rock with her.
Why had he wasted so much time? Why had he fought so hard against what he knew they both felt?
So many fucking reasons that he thought were important at the time. She had been in his life from the time he transferred at sixteen. She was only nine. But she was family. The little sister of his best friend Henley and her now husband, Deacon, who was a fellow transfer and best friend from Erudite.
He had watched her grow up, protected her and loved her from afar as time went on and she became a young woman.
His age, the fact that she was family and considered him family; it had all seemed too much to overcome. Really he was just a fucking coward. He hadn't wanted to risk losing her even a little so he never tried for anything.
Eric cups the side of her face and strokes her cheek as he looks at her but is lost in memories. Like his life flashing before his eyes but it stars her. Always her.
All the way back to the beginning of them
Visiting day when she stood in the Pit with the hand of her younger brother clutched in hers. Her back straight and proud, chestnut hair pulled back in a ponytail. The strangeness of her eyes along with Wade's had first caught his attention. A warm melting caramel but ringed around the pupil was a light green. On the outside of the iris was a darker ring of green. Depending on her mood those greens would expand and spoke more to her feelings than she would let her words do. It was apparently a trait that skipped Henley but went to her to younger siblings from some grandparent on the dad's side.
The second thing he had noticed was the bruising along her cheekbone. He wasn't the only one to notice. Henley had tensed and gotten quiet. She had asked in a low hissing voice what had happened. Her tone suggested she knew though.
Henley never mentioned what exactly caused the tension at home for her. Deacon and Eric knew something was up and that her being in initiation worried her. She worried how her siblings were doing but she never fully said why. He didn't think it was abuse but it was something.
Lacey had looked her sister square in the eyes, chin lifted, and lied through her teeth. She told her she had gotten in a fight at school. Maybe he could have accepted it but for two things. Those eyes, the bright green had flared at the same time as she squeezed her brother's hand tightly. The little boy had looked to be about to speak but had quickly looked away.
When asked what the fight was about she had countered with a bit of truth and something that gave insight into their homelife. "The usual. Dad's a drunk...mom's a whore. Nothing new, Henley. Nothing I haven't grown thick skin against." She muttered.
"Then why did you fight about it?" He blurted out, eyes narrowed in anger at what he could guess really happened.
She locked eyes with him while he tried to glare the answer from her. She never gave in though and didn't answer. The little nine year old stood her ground against Eric, who was already gaining a reputation for his intimidation tactics and training wasn't even done yet. Henley had broken the tension in an embarrassed manner and said they should all go get cake.
Lacey and Wade were the exact same age as his youngest brother and sister. Maybe that was where the immediate protective feelings had come from. Why he had made that vow sitting across from them at the table in the dining hall; to always protect and care for them.
That was how it started. Then when their mom had gone missing things came to light. By that time he was a leader in training and nearing becoming a full leader. He was working non-stop it seemed and things had slipped his notice. Henley was just as busy in the clinic being trained as a nurse and those were in short supply. She had moved in with Deacon when housing was assigned so she didn't know what was going on either.
Not that Lacey let on anything more than the usual was happening. Eric knew their dad was absent most of the time and that the mom made occasional appearances. They were both well known drunks. Supported their habit with work but also by the mom having 'friends' that paid for the privilege of her company.
As disgusting as Eric found it, there was nothing illegal about what she was doing and as long as he did his job, there was nothing he could do to him either. It wasn't until he had noticed Lacey behaving oddly and looking sick that he knew something was wrong.
She would slink into the dining hall, keeping to the shadows or close to big groups, until she made it to the kitchen doors. There she would wait and someone would usually come out, look her over, disappear before coming back out with a small box. Then she would scamper off with the box before he could catch her or see what was in it.
At first it didn't really register. Dependents were well known for wheedling the famous Dauntless cake out of some the pushover cooks. Hell, Uriah Pedrad had managed to talk one of them to giving him an entire cake once. An entire sheet cake pan full of the shit.
Eric figured that was what Lacey was up to. Getting cake for her brother and her. It was always dinner time when she showed up, or that he saw, and it made sense. Wade was probably at home doing homework and she was getting them a treat. Henley said they had to find ways to motivate Wade to do his homework.
The second week he saw her slinking in he knew something was wrong and it wasn't her getting cake. She was looking gaunt as hell and getting worse.
He had had enough. Not wanting to go to her just yet he went to the kitchen staff first. His reputation was both a blessing and a curse. The ladies there were loyal, he would give them that. They hadn't wanted to tell him anything that might get Lacey in trouble.
It turned out that at least twice a day she was going to the kitchens to get food. Not unusual when most of the faction ate in the dining hall. Most of the adult working faction that is. It was impractical and a rarity that dependents ate in the dining hall.
The family living quarters were in another building and at least a fifteen minute walk. Families had meals at their quarters more often than not. There were full kitchens in those units and stores to stock up on food.
Eric couldn't clue Henley in. He knew she would feel responsible and guilty. She was already under so much pressure at work. It could be nothing and he could be wrong. Letting her know or asking her would only alarm and stress her. But if he was being honest with himself Eric needed to be the one to take care of it. So he investigated it himself. He had never wished he was wrong so much in his life.
They had nothing there. For two months they had nothing in that apartment and couldn't get anything either. The points that they might be able to use were gone before they could even blink. She had been getting food alright but it had never been enough to feed them both. So it went to Wade.
He put a stop to that shit right there. But Lacey was proud and independent. She wouldn't take charity. Even with the kitchen staff she had made an arrangement to be there every morning before 5am to help take out the trash and clean.
So he had made her a deal. She and Wade were to have dinner with him twice a week at his apartment. The premise was that he had promised Henley after she realized her work schedule wasn't going to slow down. Not wanting to worry or upset her sister, Lacey had agreed. Then in order to get her to agree to let him get her groceries, he had grudgingly agreed to let her come clean his apartment.
The result was that the two Matheson kids were more often than not at his apartment. They became a fixture in his life. Even when his investigation into the disappearance of their mother turned out the worst result it hadn't stopped that. In fact it only intensified things.
With their mother gone, the father arrested after admitting to killing her in a drunken rage over something he can't even remember; Henley got guardianship of her siblings. Deacon and she got married and they all moved in together to a new place. Dinners still happened over at Eric's place but he was also found over at their place for meals too.
It had made the pain of leaving his own family behind lessen some. With them he truly found a new family. It had made Dauntless feel like home and the right choice.
Things started to change as Lacey got older. He always knew he loved her but had always thought it was just as a little sister. Maybe because that was the only kind of love he had ever really felt, was for his family. How was he to supposed to be able to compare something he had never had before?
He noticed the difference about the time she was set to have her choosing. He had of course seen her maturing but it was like he put on blinders purposely. Refused to admit she was anything but still a little girl. She was still young, seven years younger than him. His body responding to her in ways that were completely inappropriate were shut down and shoved away. He lived in a state of constant denial then.
He had his first clue his feelings were more and couldn't be denied when he was watching her at the choosing ceremony. He had been calm and confident up until the moment she took the knife in her hands. Then he had been hit with a feeling of panic and dread that would have taken him to his knees had he not been sitting already.
What if she left? They had just that morning joked about it. She had even flippantly tossed out that maybe he shouldn't be so cocky. She could really be meant for somewhere else. He had smirked at her, not concerned one bit. Mainly because he knew her test results.
Dauntless. As expected.
But Lacey had the maddening ability to keep him on his toes in the most hair pulling of ways at times. So the worry and panic rushed over him. What if she did go somewhere else? What could he do? What would he do? He couldn't lose her.
And then he knew; in that moment and new kind of panic rushed over him as the realization set in what exactly he had been thinking. It was like unlocking Pandora's box. Now that the thought and realization was there it wouldn't go back in that damn box.
And it just got worse until that night almost a year ago and he hadn't been able to fight it anymore.