A/N: My first entry for Blind Go a while ago. Originally it was a three part fic (that's where the lines are) with exactly 1000 words in each. You can count them if you wish.

As you might have noticed, I selected comedy/tragedy for the genre. Why? Because I want to confuse people. Hah. God I'm in a weird mood today, as no doubt you guys have noticed, since I'm practically throwing fics at you guys today. What can I say? I'm giddy from lack of sleep. Please read, enjoy, and try and determine which opposing genre it fits better in. Hikago is not mine. Do not sue. Thank you.

Half-Blind

Akira first started noticing that something was wrong with Shindou when the boy began to complain of headaches. Shindou complaining was nothing unusual, so Akira hadn't given it any thought, thinking that his rival had perhaps found a new excuse to eat more ramen than he already consumed. All he would have to do was ask, and the trap, he was sure, would be sprung.

"Headaches are a sign of ramen withdrawal," Shindou would say if questioned, and since Akira had not been in the mood to hear another long-winded rendition on the wonders of ramen followed by a waste of the next two hours watching his rival inhale four bowls of said wonder, he decided not to ask.

He began to change his mind when the boy continued complaining through their go games. Shindou was many things: irresponsible, noisy, unconventional, obnoxious—the list could continue indefinitely—but he did take go seriously. So when Shindou rubbed his forehead for the twenty-third time on just their first game alone, Akira finally had to ask.

"Shindou, what's going on?"

"Nothing," was the immediate answer.

Akira snorted, though he felt himself starting to tense. If Shindou was denying his very visible and blatant problem, it must be serious indeed.

"Fine," Akira said, and the game went on.

The next week Akira overheard Waya talking to another player. It was about Shindou, and though he hated to admit it, conversations about Shindou always caught his eye—ear. He found an excuse to pause at the elevator as if trying to decide which floor he wanted to go on next. Was the green tea at the café downstairs good? Akira was suddenly very glad that he did not know.

"So, Shindou did something really weird today," Waya said.

"You mean, something aside from his usual weird moves?" the other person asked. Clearly Akira was not the only one who thought Shindou's moves unconventional. Akira decided to store that in his mind to use for a later date at their next discussion.

"He tried putting his black stone at a place where Sakaki five-dan's stone was already," Waya hissed, the tone of worry clear in his voice.

"Oh, so that was the commotion I heard earlier today," the other person replied. "I heard a lot of stones scatter but I was too preoccupied with my own game to afford a look."

"Yeah…" Waya said, sighing. "It scattered everywhere and Sakaki-san was pissed…he lost you know. Talk about a double insult, losing to a guy who couldn't even place his stones in the right place."

"So what was Shindou's excuse?"

"That's the strange thing. He just said that he'd been getting a lot of headaches lately, so his vision's blurry…" Waya's voice trailed off, and Akira's thoughts immediately returned to green tea.

Two pairs of eyes turned slowly toward Akira's back. Green tea sounded good, Akira decided, and pushed the button for the first floor, pretending that he didn't hear Waya's outraged, "The bastard, he was spying on us!" as he left.

The green tea at the café was indeed good, and Akira made future plans to stop there more often. Perhaps he could distract Shindou's mind enough away from ramen, McDonald's, and varieties of other junk he stuffed himself with and get him to come here instead. And speaking of which…Akira flipped open his cell phone and began to dial.

"So is there a reason why we're meeting all of a sudden today?" Shindou asked. He sounded casual, but Akira knew him well enough to know that his rival was curious and not a little suspicious. They were at the crosswalk in the middle of Tokyo's largest shopping district, and there were no go salons or any other go-related thing in sight.

"Yes," Akira said. "Do you still have those headaches?"

The question caused Shindou to pause in the middle of the open street.

"Why do you ask?"

"Because I know a way to stop them," Akira said.

"Then why can't you just tell me?" Shindou said irritably. But then his face changed rapidly as another thought crossed his mind. "Or is it a big problem and I have to see the doctor?"

"Well, you do have to see a doctor."

"I'm not…I'm not dying am I?" His rival's voice began to rise.

Would it be better to yell at him at this point, or burst out laughing? Used more to yelling at Shindou as opposed to smiling, Akira decided on the former action.

"How dense are you? Haven't you put the symptoms together and figured it out for yourself already?"

"What symptoms?"

"The headaches! The blurry vision! The fact that you get headaches when you're looking at something!" Akira paused so that the proof could sink into his rival's thick skull and register. When all that answered was an unnatural silence, Akira continued on. "At any rate, you're getting your head examined."

"I am not crazy!"

"You're doing a good job driving everybody else crazy," Akira snapped. "Haven't you realized what you need already?"

"No!"

"Shindou…" Akira reminded himself that his rival played very good go and that this was enough, even if it meant he was lacking in other areas. "How long do you study go everyday?"

"Late. Sometimes past midnight. Why?"

"Has it never occurred to you to think about what you're doing to your eyes when you study that long?"

"So says the guy who does nothing but study, eat, play, and live go," Shindou retorted, but he looked like he was starting to realize what was going on. At the very least the panic was subsiding and something very much like dread was replacing it. "So what are you saying?"

"Shindou, the reason why you're getting headaches is because your eyes and your brain are working overtime trying to compensate for a gradually deteriorating vision," Akira explained patiently. "The solution for this is very easy of course. You need glasses."

"I need what?!"

"I do not," Hikaru said slowly, "need glasses," all the while trying desperately to keep his anxiety at bay. Wearing glasses anchored him permanently into a category he did not wish to be associated with. Ever.

Touya unfortunately, as Hikaru knew all too well, was as stubborn as his go.

"Yes you do."

"No I don't!"

"Fine, keep getting headaches then!" Touya snapped, then added unexpectedly, "I'm not kind like Sakaki five-dan is though. If you spill the stones in one of our games because you couldn't see well enough to place the stones, you forfeit the match. Right now I'm beating you two hundred and seventy-three to eighty-six. Do you want the difference to keep rising?"

Hikaru flushed, not wishing to be reminded of it. Waya had called him last night to report that Touya had been "spying" again, though this did not bother him as much as it probably should. They were rivals, which implied that they were supposed to keep close tabs on each other. Hikaru did the same. He was just more circumspect about it. He hoped.

"And how did you know about that? You weren't there that day," he baited. "Or at least you weren't supposed to be."

Touya, damn him, chose to ignore him instead of answering. If he had taken it they could have started an argument right then, and any talk about glasses would be long forgotten. Hikaru cursed under his breath, and tried again. They had started walking again, and Hikaru had to end this before they reached the office. He had his reputation at stake here.

"So this doctor you're taking me to. You pay for the examination, right?"

"No."

"What? Why, when you're the one dragging me to—"

"It's not me that's being examined," Touya said, not taken in at all. "It's you. So you pay for it."

"And how do you know I can afford it?"

"You mean you can't?" Akira said flatly. "You live with your parents, and you're still a minor, which means they pay for your health care. Last I checked, getting an eye examination fell under health care."

Hikaru couldn't very well tell him that his family was poor when he was standing before him wearing brand name clothes, so he instead opted for the classic sulk.

"I don't want to wear glasses!"

"You should have thought of that when you were studying go late into the night."

"And you should stop acting like you don't do the same, you go obsessed freak! You probably don't rest your eyes any more than I do."

"I do let them rest," Akira replied.

"When? How?"

"Every afternoon after a go game. I meditate," Akira said with great dignity.

"About go," Hikaru felt obligated to point out. Even if he was fighting a losing battle, he could at least die happy knowing that he was the more normal of the two of them.

"But thinking about it is different from looking at a board."

"But it's still about go."

"Please don't try to equate what I do in my spare time to the ridiculous things you do during yours." Touya's eyes flashed, a sign that he was starting to really lose his patience. "Or is there another reason why you're trying to stall? Are you scared of something?"

That's a cheap move Hikaru wanted to argue, but couldn't, because Touya, damn him, was right.

"If I start wearing glasses I'll look…I'll look like a nerd."

"You'll what?" Touya said, bemusement preventing an appropriate retort.

"I mean, the only thing saving me at the moment is that people don't look at me and think "go nerd". They think "normal kid". But if I wear glasses I'll start to look like…Ochi. I don't want to look like Ochi. I might start wearing ugly sweaters like he does and become a hideous mix of him and you."

Hikaru was babbling and he knew it. So did Touya. Lips pressed tightly together, eyes half-lidded yet gleaming bright, Touya looked the part of a parent getting ready to thrash a disobedient child. Hikaru resented that. After all, he was the older one. It should be the other way around.

"Shindou," Touya said, trying to sound as reasonable as possible, "wearing glasses doesn't necessarily mean you'd look like Ochi. Perhaps you'd look more like…Ogata-san."

"Ogata-san? I'll look like Ogata-san?" Hikaru said, his voice raising an octave with every word. "Touya, looking like a nerd is bad enough, but if I look like Ogata-sensei I think a large part of me will die a little. Not just a little I mean. A lot. I'd rather look like Ochi."

"There's nothing wrong with looking like Ogata-san!"

"Sure there is, if you'd rather not look like a pedophile! I'm a normal boy with tastes that run to those of my own age thank you!"

"Ogata-san isn't a pedophile," Touya snapped.

"You mean you don't notice the way he eyes you like he wants to…to…to lick you up? Like er…candy?"

"Ogata-san wants to lick me up like candy?"

"Yes! Don't tell me you don't notice, because it's blatantly obvious."

"Shindou, you're being ridiculous. Your efforts to delay our arrival at the doctor's office are proving fruitless, so why don't you just give up?"

Hikaru was not about to admit the truth of this, so he continued to plow forward.

"I don't know why you're so insistent that I see a doctor anyway. Why do you care?"

"Because you play badly enough. You don't need another handicap against me," Touya said, displaying not an ounce of sympathy.

"Oh I see. It's not that you care about me. You just care about our games."

"You can think whatever you want Shindou," Touya said, sounding exasperated. He paused before a nondescript building and looked up toward a sign listing an optometry office on the third floor. In case people couldn't read the characters, a giant, painted eye underneath further emphasized the point. "Besides, we're here already."

"The game isn't over yet," Shindou said, still determined. "I can still turn things around in the end game."

"Shindou, the end game's already been played out. I won. Now get into the office, or do I have to drag you in?"

"You can't make me!"

"If it's not me it'll be someone else. Would you rather your mother took you?"

The comment had been calculated, taking in the fact that Akira himself found the idea of being accompanied by his mother distasteful. For Shindou, it would be doubly so. Akira refused to look at all the mystified gazes directed at the two of them, and pulled a very reluctant Shindou up the stairs to the third floor.

"Good afternoon!" greeted the lady at the counter. "How may I help you today?"

"I made an appointment earlier yesterday for Shindou Hikaru," Akira said, smiling politely.

"You made an appointment for me?" Shindou hissed.

"Naturally. Did you think you could walk in?"

Looking nonplussed, Shindou did not deign to answer. Instead he silently accepted the clipboard the lady handed him, and took a seat in one of the blue plastic chairs arranged against the wall.

"The doctor will be with you shortly."

Shindou did not hear her. He was too busy scribbling what for him passed as writing.

"Okay, I'm done. Wanna play go on my magnetic set?" Shindou asked brightly in an abrupt change of mood that Akira had learned was typical of him.

"We probably shouldn't. Your eyes."

Large eyes blinked slowly. Akira met them with a solemn gaze of his own.

"Touya, did you just refuse to play go with me?"

"It's for a good cause."

The expression on Shindou's face was still of complete and utter shock, and remained that way until the doctor arrived. He was a friendly looking man, slightly balding, and wore light, rimless glasses. Smiling at the two boys, he looked from one to the other, unsure which boy was supposed to be his patient.

"This is Shindou Hikaru," Akira said, when it looked like no reply from Shindou was forthcoming.

"And you are?" the doctor asked, turning to him, beaming.

"His sibling," Akira lied glibly. He saw Shindou about to open his mouth in outrage, and continued, "Lately he's been getting headaches, so I thought I'd take him here for a check up."

The doctor beamed at him.

"You're such a kind, responsible young man to be taking care of your little brother like that."

Just above his left temple, Akira felt a steady pulsing where Shindou was methodically shooting mental daggers.

"I try."

"So Shindou-kun, would you follow me to my office?"

Akira couldn't resist one last stab. Kitajima-san had once told him that Shindou brought out the worst in him. Akira was inclined to agree.

"Do you want me to accompany you?" Akira asked innocently.

"I'll go in myself!"

Under the shadows of his bangs, his rival was glowering.

The doctor had been one of the most uncooperative old farts he had ever had the misfortune to come across. Only one person was more uncooperative, but he at least played go. This one preferred shougi, which was unforgivable.

"At the moment you're only slightly far-sighted, so I can't honestly prescribe contacts for you yet, though we can think of it sometime in the next few months. I'm sure that your brother will help keep you from losing them. He's such a helpful young man, you should try to emulate him." And then the idiot had beamed again.

He's not my brother Hikaru had wanted to shout. Touya's a go rival who enjoys torturing me on a daily basis, and someday I'll crush him and return the favor.

He grimaced as he felt the hard case of his new glasses in his jacket pocket. It was a difficult decision he would have to make today. Either he could make a fool of himself spilling go stones over his opponent like last time, or he could look like a dork. Both were equally horrible things to contemplate.

He stepped out of the elevators with his stomach in knots. Were there people around? The corridor looked empty, so he took a deep breath to calm himself. Whatever happened, go came first.

"Hey Shindou! So how do they look?"

Waya, grinning like a fiend, peeked out from behind the hidden corner between the game room and the elevator.

"Waya? Waya! How did you…how…"

"Touya told us of course. Called me last night so I can make sure you put them on. Naturally I told everyone else."

Silently Hikaru made plans for murder. First he'll start with Touya, then Waya—wait he had to leave out some people, otherwise he'd have no one to place with…

"H-he did?"

"Yeah, so show us. I wanna see?"

"Yes, do show us," Ochi said, lifting his giant frames up so they lit menacingly.

Trembling a little, Hikaru gripped the case, preparing to run. But he was surrounded!

"Only for a second," he heard himself saying. Wait, was he stupid? Why was he taking the glasses out of the case and putting it on? Was that Touya coming out of the elevators? But today wasn't his game day, so why…shit. He froze, waiting for the laughter to burst from the now near crowd that had gathered. Saeki and Isumi had come over to look too.

"Huh. Not bad," Ochi said.

"Yeah, not bad at all Shindou. Actually you look kinda intelligent," Waya said.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"No, it really does look good on you," Isumi added earnestly.

"So I don't look like Ogata-sensei?" Hikaru said anxiously.

"Far from it."

"Nor a dork?"

"Shindou, you already are a dork. This just makes it official. No, I'm serious, it looks good on you."

As a group, they headed into the game room. One last time, Shindou turned around, and there was Touya smiling like a cat with a bowl of cream. When he turned around, he could hear the words "I told you so," said silently behind him.

A/N: It must be noted that because this fic is complete CRACK, accuracy is not one of my main focuses. The Japanese actually have national health care. Yes, I am aware of this. I live in Japan, thank you very much. I am also aware that you can sometimes get contacts immediately, but that would ruin the fun of imagining Shindou getting glasses. In the spirit of crack, please forgive my inconsistencies. Thank you.