Disclaimer: I hold no connections to the ownership of anything in this fic. .Nada. Okay?
Rating: T for language and mentions of mature themes (nothing extreme, just a mention of an attempted assault and by extension, a death). Because this is Pyro and the Scarlet Witch we're talking about.
Note: This drabble fic spans over the Movie, Evolution and WATXM Universes. You can decide which Drabble goes into what 'verse. Drongo is Aussie slang for a silly person, for all the people out in the world who may or may not be educated in the way of Aussie slang.
Drabble For Jonda (St. John Allerdyce and Wanda Maximoff – Pyro and the Scarlet Witch)
A is for Acolytes:
When St. John Allerdyce first met Magneto, he wasn't too keen on the metal-obsessed mutant. Still, he was offering a way out from the trouble he'd gotten himself in, so he took the job. Meeting the rest of Magsies recruits, however, made him second guess his decision. He'd been paired up with a womanising Cajun obsessed with cards, a Russian painter who practically created the term 'Silent Giant', and a fur ball of a feral 'cat' mutant. He cursed his luck. He would have preferred to stay with the Brotherhood. At least they were sane, compared to this bunch. He paused as he heard the now usual disagreement between Sabertooth and Gambit. Grabbing his lighter, he headed down stairs. Maybe if he heated things up a little, he'd get sent to join the Brotherhood. To his great disappointment, it didn't work.
B is for Brotherhood:
When Wanda first joined the Brotherhood, the boys learned quickly to do as she said, or she'd go into a hex bolt throwing rage. Lance was her co-leader, a voice of occasional wisdom in the whirlwind of chaos that was the Brotherhood. More often than not, though, he was her General, carrying out her orders on the field of battle with the X-Geeks. Pietro was an obnoxious child, Todd was an annoyance and Freddy was a teddy bear. When John arrived, he became her co-leader, the sole voice of insane reason in their home. She smiled as she watched John and Pietro fight, the Aussie mutant getting bored of the argument setting Pietro's underwear on fire. She wouldn't change it for the world.
C is for Crazy:
Many people had called St. John Allerdyce crazy, and many more would join that list as he aged. But for now, he enjoyed laughing at them, wreaking havoc with his Sheila and his flames.
D is for Drunk:
Never get John drunk. It would take a fair few beers, but when he was completely smashed, the Brotherhood learnt to keep him away from anything that could possibly be used as fuel for flames. Of course, Wanda was very helpful by sobering him up to the point of just tipsiness, which made him a good entertainment source for her. When he was tipsy, he was very cuddly. When he was drunk, he brooded, and nobody liked the broody Pyro. Least of all the Fire Department.
E is for Eggs:
John was the official breakfast cook at the 'Hood house. Lunch and dinner was Freddy's domain, but the House quickly fell in love with John's eggs. In the morning, all John would have to do was holler, "Eggs!" up the stairs and a stampede would quickly ensue.
F is for Fire:
Fire was a deadly thing in the hands of an angry Pyro. If you made him truly mad, it wouldn't end well for you. Like the time Sabertooth hid John's notebook with all his ideas in it. That was a very good way to make him furious. Another way was to insult Wanda. Of course, you wouldn't live to tell the tale, and if you did, you were never the same.
G is for Grey:
The line that separated good from evil was not as clear cut as the X-Men liked to portray. Anyone who had been in the Brotherhood – Tabitha and Rogue – knew this as well as the continuing members of the 'Hood. There would always be varying shades of stark grey, Rogue mused as John cradled his Sheila in his arms, as the smoking corpse of the man who'd tried to rape Wanda lay forgotten.
H is for Help:
John laughed. He couldn't help it. After all, you would too if you saw Remy stuck upside down in the chimney. The Cajun glowered at him. "Shut up and help me, Pyro." He grumbled, staring death at the Aussie rolling on the floor. A bright flash blinded him for a moment, and when he could see again, he saw Wanda standing on the stairs, camera in hand. "Oh, Rogue is going to love this!" she laughed at his despairing face.
I is for Ice-Cream:
Wanda rolled her eyes as she watched her boyfriend make a mess with the mint ice-cream he was eating. With a small laugh, she reached over and wiped the cold treat from the tip of his nose, causing him to go cross-eyed for a moment, before he pulled her into a sticky, ice-cream fuelled kiss.
J is for John:
John didn't know what his parents were thinking when they named him St. John Allerdyce. Maybe they were hoping he would turn into a saint, he mused as he rough housed with the rest of the Brotherhood. If so, they weren't exactly successful.
K is for Kiss:
Mustering up his courage, John tip—toed up behind Wanda. Taking his chance, he tapped her on the shoulder, and when she turned around, kissed her.
L is for Lighter (featuring prank subject – Pietro!):
"!" The scream of Pietro's morning wake-up call was music to John's ears as he flicked his lighter off. The fact that it made Wanda laugh was an added bonus.
M is for Magneto:
Magneto, John was sure, was certifiably insane. Not the kind that you smacked in an institute. No, he was the one who you avoided at all costs; slammed into the same category with the creepy old perverted man in the decrepit house at the end of the neighbourhood that perved on girls. He was the one you treated as a rabid dog, and he was the kind you got rid of before the madness spread. The Aussie mutant turned possible ideas of putting Magneto down before the madness spread as he watched Remy and his stripy haired sheila argue.
N is for Never:
"I swear, the drongos' at that fancy mansion are never gonna learn, Sheila." John shook his head in disgust as he watched yet another creation of Forge's run lose, wreaking havoc on Bayville.
O is for Octopus (featuring prank subject – Pietro...again):
"!" screamed Pietro, as John slipped a live octopus down his shirt. Taking the chance, the Pyro used the hyper mutant's distraction to kiss Wanda again.
P is for Practise:
John dragged a dummy dressed as his Sheila's old man into the 'Hood House's back yard, setting him up on a pole and tying him upright. He ignored the questioning glances the boys gave him as he turned to Wanda. "Target practise is all set up, luv." He beamed, the joy he saw in his Sheila's eyes rivalling that of the sun.
Q is for Quest:
John slipped throughout the house, in and out of rooms, like he was looking for something. Lance wasn't too worried, as John was holding his notebook this time, so it clearly wasn't missing. He chuckled. Wanda, who had just walked into the kitchen, raised an eyebrow at him. He smirked and elaborated. "Lover boy's on another quest again, Wands." He grinned, returning to his cereal and paper as she went to find the Aussie.
R is for Romy:
"Romy!" John exclaimed, bolting upright. His sudden movement caused Todd to jump on the ceiling, and Pietro to fall off the couch he was lounging on. Lance and Freddy looked on with a calm, slightly disinterested air as they paused from their card game. Wanda looked at her boyfriend. "That's what we should call Remy and Roguey when we're talking about both of them!" Wanda just rolled her eyes and smiled tolerantly at her boyfriend, before she kissed him, hexing Pietro when he started talking about getting a room.
S is for Shelia:
For John, the word 'sheila' meant woman, girl, etc. Wanda, however, was synonymous with the word 'Sheila'. For while there would always be other girls, there would only be the one Sheila for him.
T is for Typewriter:
There was an old typewriter that sat in John's room, on his desk. Next to it laid sheaves of paper, all with a story printed on the crisp white pages. And on every page, there was a story for Wanda.
U is for Unknown:
"Here we are~ At the edge of the abyss~" Johnny warbled, mimicking Ol' One-Eye's voice as he gave grand gestures to the small audience of the Brotherhood as he directed little fire puppets in a theatre. Funnily enough, it was much like the Punch and Judy show – with the Brotherhood and associates (i.e. Rogue, Remy and Jamie) shown in triumphant light, while Jean, Scott and the rest of the X-Men (including the X-Kids) were shown in such a way that it made them look like a pack of drunk's from the local pub. "Off to venture into the unknown~"
V is for Vengeance:
"Mwah-ha-ha-ha!" cackled one Aussie Pyro. "Burn baby, burn!" he sang, dancing around a large bonfire pit in the backyard of the Boarding House. Todd and Pietro were egging John on, joining in on the spectacle, while Lance, Fred and Wanda watched from the back porch. Lance sighed. "Told you they'd do this, Wands." He squirmed about on his seat, finding a comfortable spot and sinking into the canvas hammock. The sole girl in the team blinked. "Well, yeah, of course they would. I just didn't think it would be this bad!" The bonfire contained the personal effects of one (recently incarcerated) Duncan Matthews. Silly little flat scan human. You should have known better than to hit on Wanda. The boys of the 'Hood were now enacting their vengeance.
W is for Wanda:
Wanda was a woman that would command your painful death as soon as look at you. The only person she didn't hold some kind of anger towards, was John. What could she say? He made her laugh.
X is for X-Men:
"I mean seriously, what's with all these stupid bloody names?" John was always animated when he was in the middle of a rant, and this time was no different. Lance ducked as a ball of flame flew through what would have been his chest, had he not moved. As it was, it singed his hair before being extinguished by way of Todd's slime. "Strewth, Brotherhood's understandable – it makes sense and it can work with us. Acolytes? Acolytes of what exactly? And X-Men? What, does that mean that the blokes in that group have undergone surgery to become ex-men? As in no longer men, just...genderless? Bloody oath mate, I tell ya, people in positions of power are just plain drongo's sometimes!"
Y is for Yanks:
"Damn Yanks'", John muttered, fingers twitching to his lighter in defence of his best mate's girlfriend. Silently, Wanda gained an evil smirk as she sent a hex bolt in the direction of the flat scan that had pushed Rogue to the ground. The quartet of mutants walked away, Wanda and John feeling quite pleased with the mischief they'd caused as the flat scan behind them danced around, Wanda's hex making him act like a little girl.
Z is for Zoo:
John grumbled under his breath as he watched the mini X-Brats run around the zoo. "Remind me why we have to watch 'em?" he asked, looking at his Sheila. Wanda smiled. "We needed some time away from the boys, and Rogue wanted us to keep an eye on Remy while she watched the X-Brats, Johnny." She said, her tone mild as she sent a hex bolt at said Cajun, giving him the equivalent of a sharp smack upside the head when she caught him staring at Rogue's ass. An enlightened look entered John's eyes. "Ah, that's right." He agreed, offering her some of his ice-cream, ignoring Remy's curses in favour of smiling at his Sheila.