This is the sequel to Haven for a Heart. I hope you all enjoy it.
Thank you to everyone who made Haven such an amazing experience for me, you've shown me what great friends I've made here at the Forum.
To my sister, spookycc - how do I thank you for the encouragement, support and continued friendship? You're the best sister a person could want. Thanks for always being there.
(Oh - and I don't own any of the characters created by Dick Wolf and LOCI - you know who they are)
Chapter 1
Charli sat on the back porch swing, enjoying the evening breeze. She laid her hand on her swollen stomach and studied her wedding ring, the ring that Bobby had placed on her finger with a promise for their future. In the week since Nicole's attempt on her life, Charli was beginning to fear that she and Bobby might not have that future. He had become withdrawn and distant, leaving Charli to ponder what he wasn't saying.
He had been badly shaken by the intricacy of Nicole's plan and angry that he hadn't been able to see through it. But after revealing this to Charli, Bobby hadn't discussed the situation with her again. Sighing, she struggled to her feet and walked back into the house. Bobby was in the living room reading a book, and Charli watched him unnoticed for a moment before she moved forward to kiss his cheek.
"I'm going up to bed," she told him, laying a hand on his shoulder.
"I'll be up in a bit. I just want to finish this chapter," he replied with a smile. "Don't wait up," he added, turning his attention back to the book.
She had heard 'don't wait up' too many times over the last week. Rather than responding, she walked from the living room and went slowly up the stairs to the bedroom. Freshly showered, she slid a nightgown on over her head before standing in front of the mirror to comb out her long, damp hair. Braiding her hair with experienced fingers, she studied her reflection in the mirror, recognizing the sadness in her green eyes. She had thought never to see it again since her marriage to Bobby.
Bobby slid between the sheets an hour later, aware of Charli's soft breathing on the opposite side of the bed. Lying on his back, he stared at the ceiling for a moment, closing his eyes at the sound of the gunshot replaying itself in his head. He could have lost Charli in that brief instant, along with their children. All because of Nicole Wallace and her desire for revenge.
He felt Charli moving in the darkness and she snuggled into his warmth, sliding her hand over his chest. Bobby laid his hand over hers in an effort to assure himself she was safe and his other arm hugged her to him. The nightmares he'd experienced had left him shaken and wracked with guilt. She could have died because of him. He hadn't even considered the possibility that Charli's stalker had been connected to him in any way.
"Bobby," Charli whispered into the darkness, pressing a kiss to the side of his throat.
"I'm here, Chuck," he replied softly, squeezing her hand lightly.
"You aren't really," she told him. "You've been very far away since last week."
"I'm fine. Just – I've just had a lot on my mind," he hedged but he felt Charli shake her head.
"Not a lot – just one person, really," she smoothed her hand over his chest. "You should go see her, Bobby. If you don't talk to her it's going to keep eating at you."
"I don't want to talk to her," Bobby denied. "I don't want to think or talk about her."
"So as a result you're pushing me away. This was my fault, Bobby – I should have been more than a little suspicious of her – she was too interested in being my friend." Even as she spoke, Charli struggled to sit up.
"It wasn't your fault," Bobby assured her, sitting up so that his back rested against the headboard. "Nicole had a plan that she – executed almost to perfection. None of this – nothing that happened was your fault. It was mine – for not realizing -," he broke off, running a hand over his face.
"For not realizing what? That she assumed another person's identity – that she worked out this sick plan and involved Phil Dresden? How could you have known?"
"I was too wrapped up in other things – too distracted."
"By me?"
When Bobby didn't answer, Charli shook her head, saying:
"So it is my fault – you're pulling away from me because you think I'm a distraction."
"I didn't say that," Bobby began to reach for her but Charli evaded his grasp and slipped, albeit clumsily, from the bed.
"You aren't saying anything, Bobby – that's the problem."
"Where are you going?"
"Downstairs," she answered. "Don't wait up." The latter was said over her shoulder as she pulled open the bedroom door. Bobby sighed in frustration but didn't follow her.
Bobby hadn't thought he slept but when he glanced at the clock it was almost 2:00AM. He reached for Charli, only to find the bed empty. Swinging his long legs over the side of the bed, he reached for his jeans, pulling them on before going in search of his missing wife. She wasn't downstairs; he searched each room and called for her but received no response. The doors were locked from the inside and his keys sat on the kitchen counter as verification that she hadn't left.
Returning upstairs, he checked the nursery only to find it empty also. Running a hand over the back of his neck, he padded barefoot along the hallway to the spare bedroom they had furnished for Maggie and Jacob's visits. Opening the door, he saw Charli sleeping on the bed and studied her in the darkness. She was right; he had been pushing her away. He was vulnerable now because of her and that opened him up to circumstances he hadn't previously considered. There would be situations that could put Charli and their children in danger because of his job. If he allowed those unforeseen situations to trouble him, he'd ruin any chance for happiness they now had.
Charli woke to the feel of Bobby's body pressed to hers, his hand on her stomach, holding her against him. She lay silently for a moment to make certain she wasn't dreaming. He had followed her into the spare bedroom. The thought brought her some comfort that he wanted to be with her. Although they hadn't been intimate since she had come home from the hospital, he had continued to hold her each night. In sleep, his guard slipped and he reached for her. It was the one thing that gave Charli hope that he'd find his way back to her.
"Don't -," he whispered against her ear, when she shifted slightly into a more comfortable position.
"Don't what?" she asked, just as softly.
"Don't leave me," he revealed his fear in the safety of the darkness.
"I'm not going anywhere." Charli laid her hand over his where it rested on her stomach, running a finger over his wedding ring. "You're the one who's been pulling away from me," she reminded him.
"I don't mean to – I just -," he broke off. "The thought of losing you scares the hell out of me – I've never had to worry about anyone besides my mother and she had round the clock care."
"And Frank and now Donnie -," Charli rolled onto her right side to face her husband. "You worry about everyone you know – except yourself." She laid her right hand on his cheek. "The thought of losing you scares me, too. You're putting your life on the line every time you walk out the door to go to work. We need to deal with our fears or we don't stand a chance."
"What are you getting at?"
"Talk to her, Bobby. She's the cause of whatever's bothering you."
"I told you that I don't want to talk to her," Bobby began but Charli placed a finger on his lips to silence him.
"You may not want to, but you have to," she stated. "If for no other reason, then for me so, that we can put this behind us, please."
Bobby said nothing in response; instead he kissed her gently, reaching out to touch her cheek with gentle fingers. Before he could draw back, Charli pressed her lips to his and laid her hand on his chest. Her tongue touched his lips, uncertain of his reaction but Bobby moaned softly in his throat before taking control of the kiss. His tongue parted her lips as his hand began a slow exploration of her body.
Sitting at his desk the following morning, Bobby's expression changed from a reminiscent smile of the previous evening to one of deep contemplation at the thought of the task that lie ahead of him. Tapping his pencil absently on his desk, he glanced across at Eames.
"What is it, Bobby?" She asked, aware of her partner's indecisiveness.
"Would you – do you want to go for a ride with me?"
"Depends on where we're going," Alex studied him across the expanse of their desks.
"I – I want to pay a visit to Riker's." He waited for her reaction.
"Riker's? You want to see Nicole Wallace? Are you sure?"
"No, I'm not sure at all. Charli – Charli thinks I should," Bobby met Eames' gaze.
"She's a wise woman. It's probably the only way you're going to get closure on this, Bobby." Even as she spoke, Alex reached for the keys to the police issue SUV. "Let's go."
"Well, well – Detectives Eames and Goren," Nicole was led into the visiting cell by two guards. "I was wondering who would possibly want to visit me. What can I do for you?" she asked, sitting at the table across from Alex. Bobby stood with his back against the wall, studying her silently.
"I – my wife thought that you and I needed to talk," Bobby remained where he was, watching the effect the words 'my wife' had on Nicole. Her expression wavered, only for a moment and while he was certain Eames didn't notice, he did. "Even after you tried to kill her, she seems worried about you."
"She is a naïve little thing, isn't she?" Nicole replied. "She must bore you to tears."
"She's a better person that you could ever dream of being," Bobby replied softly, walking towards the table. "She is the reason I thought you might stand a chance." Pulling out a chair, he sat alongside Eames.
"What could she possibly have to do with you and me, Bubby?"
"It was because of Charli – because of what she had suffered through and survived – that I thought there was some hope for you."
"Suffered through? She's the daughter of a wealthy, influential politician, she's never suffered," Nicole dismissed the thought.
"You don't think so? You don't think that her father would be capable of physical and emotional abuse? From the moment she can remember, she'd lived in fear of his – temper, his outbursts. She never knew if simply saying 'good morning' was going to bring on a – a beating," Bobby swallowed as he said the last words, the thought of Charli being abused causing bile to rise in his throat.
"How many times do I have to tell you that I was never abused?" Nicole asked him, her voice growing louder at her denial.
"I'm not talking about you. I'm talking about Charli," Bobby reminded her, shaking a finger slowly back and forth in her direction. "Her mother – walked out on her, her brother and sisters when Charli was barely 8. Whatever the reason, Charli was the only one Harris abused."
Alex sat silently, listening to Bobby speak. She had learned of the abuse a few years earlier but hadn't felt it her business to ask questions. Knowing her partner as she did, Alex realized that her presence served a dual purpose, the first to keep Bobby from harming Nicole and the second to let Alex farther into Charli's past.
"When – when I first met Charli I didn't know about the abuse. I knew she was shy – she didn't trust easily – but I saw something in her. I saw a gifted, beautiful person and after a while, I was able to gain her trust. I – I won her friendship." He studied Nicole's stony expression, looking for any sort of reaction. "When she was 19 – Harris beat her so badly that she almost died – he left her bleeding and broken at the bottom of a flight of stairs. He beat her because he thought that she'd been with me – that she and I were lovers.
She never told me – she didn't want me to bear the guilt over what her father had done to her. Even when she was in pain – when she was dealing with the grief of learning she'd never have children – she had the compassion to want to protect me. She chose to become a teacher so that she could help children – and I know for a fact that she's gotten at least two children out of abusive homes.
Time and again she has shown me what friendship and kindness are. When I first met you – I saw something in you that reminded me of Charli – I thought that if someone helped you find that little girl, that part of you that no one could touch – maybe you stood a chance. The reason I ever had any hope for you was because of Charli."
"Because of Charli?!" Nicole shook her head. "She's a boring, mousy fool. You're with her because of those children she's carrying. Children that you can't even be certain are yours."
"What – what would make you think I'm not the father of Charli's twins?"
Alex didn't look at Bobby but she knew that his face had reddened from embarrassment and a slowly burning anger.
"You read Dresden's letters – he and your precious Charli were lovers before you ever entered the picture."
"Dresden's letters were as delusional as he was – delusions that you helped fuel, Nicole. He knew Charli from St. Gregory's – that was the only contact they had," Bobby kept his voice controlled, not revealing his temper. "She was your friend," Bobby replied softly. "All you did was use and betray her. You – used her and Dresden to get to me."
"I did what I had to do to make you suffer for the things you've done to me," Nicole was positively hateful. "When you took Gwen from me, that was the final straw. I knew that one day, I would find your weakness – the one person that meant more to you than anything else. When I saw you with Charli at the funeral, I knew that you had feelings for her. Feelings that you were keeping hidden even from yourself. It was just a matter of time after that."
"What happened to the real Janice Fletcher?"
"She went on an extended holiday," the words sounded ominous and the partners exchanged a knowing look. Nicole had disposed of the woman and assumed her identity. They would need to work on finding the teacher's remains.
"And now you'll start your 'extended holiday', Nicole," Alex replied with a cool certainty. "You're going to be facing life without the possibility of parole and there's no chance that you're walking on this one."
"Don't be so certain, Detective – the possibilities in one's life are endless."
"Not for you, Nicole – not anymore," Bobby rose to his feet. "I'll be damned if you're ever going to have another chance to harm my family – I made my position crystal clear to you that day." He stood staring down at her until she looked away in discomfort, recalling his threatening words. "If I had any say in this, I'd ask the DA to pursue the death penalty."
Alex's head jerked to look at him at the same time Nicole's snapped back to look up at him. Detective Robert Goren had never supported the death penalty. Such an admission told of his contempt for the woman who sat before him. Nicole maintained her composure although her eyes told of her fear. The chair Bobby had been sitting in scraped the floor as it slid in reaction to the force of his movement away from the table. Alex followed behind him and was almost knocked over when he turned unexpectedly.
"You – you fell in love with her, didn't you?"
"She's nothing to me – other than a way to get to you," Nicole denied, rising from her own chair to lessen Bobby's intimidating height.
"It started that way – at first, she was my – my weakness. You knew that I was in love with her," Bobby came to stand just inches from her. "But – once you got to know her – to see what a good person she was – you fell in love with her, just like I did. That was why you destroyed her apartment and her car. You were jealous – taking your anger out on her – her belongings because you couldn't get to her."
"You're as delusional as your mother," Nicole's temper was showing itself.
"Sometimes," he responded, causing Nicole's expression to waver slightly. "Delusional to think that you could compare to Charli in anyway possible. But sane – sane enough to know how you feel about her. That was why – even when you had her at gunpoint, you didn't shoot until I was there. You wanted me dead – why else would you have called me? Warned me about what you were planning?"
"No, I wanted you to see her die – to know that you had been responsible!" Nicole's voice rose in denial.
"No!" Bobby's own voice rose in response. "You were pissed off because Charli wasn't interested in you. You acted out – you ransacked her apartment and car - that happened the first night Charli and I – resumed our relationship. You were a jealous, irrational suitor. You were worse than Dresden. You were pitiful and vindictive."
"You don't know anything – she and Dresden were lovers before you ever came into the picture. Those children she's carrying aren't yours…" Nicole began harshly but Bobby took a threatening step towards her, causing Eames to move closer, in case her interference was needed.
Instead, he paused for a moment to gather his thoughts before leaning in close to her ear, the same as he had done the week before. He whispered softly and Eames watched Nicole's expression turn from smug contempt to one of defeat. Alex only heard one word of the exchange but it was enough for her to understand what had been said. Charli had been a virgin the first time she and Bobby had been together. Nicole's conviction that Dresden and Charli had been lovers before Bobby had backfired on her.
"Are you OK?" Alex glanced across at him as they approached the SUV. Bobby seemed to consider her question for a moment before he said:
"Yeah, I am. Thanks." He gave her an easy smile as he pulled open the passenger door, realizing that he felt as if a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He had been harboring guilt over Nicole Wallace, feeling that he could have helped her, when in fact she had revealed that she had no redeeming qualities. Any similarities he had seen in her to Charli had been a mistake and one that he now was able to lay to rest.
"Are you certain this is what you want to do?" Mitchell Travis studied his wife across the backseat of the cab.
"No, I'm not," Carolyn responded softly, her mind wandering back through the years as she traveled the familiar tree lined street to the home that had been her brother's. "But I have to do this. If only for my own peace of mind."
"It's been 21 years, Carrie. You need to be prepared that it might be too late," Mitch said.
"If it's too late, there's no one to blame but myself," she offered her husband a sad smile. "Jimmy's gone, I've made my peace with Marti and Kaitlyn. Now I need to talk to Trisha and Charli," she finished on a sigh, turning her gaze back out the window of the taxi. Charli would be almost 30 now, a far cry from the child that had stared after her mother when Carolyn had left her all those years ago.
Charli stood on the back porch, holding a glass of ice water as she watched Bobby cut the grass. As he turned the lawnmower and saw her standing there, he smiled and released his grip on the mower. The engine died out and he left it to join her on the porch, taking the water from her.
"Thank you," he said, kissing her softly.
"You're welcome," she smiled. She knew that he had gone to see Nicole a few days earlier and that they had talked, but Charli had not asked for details. Bobby would tell her when the time presented itself.
They sat on the swing, Bobby holding the water in one hand and laying his free hand on her belly. The babies were active any time Charli was at rest as of late, making sleep difficult. Bobby would lay awake with her, talking into the early morning while he massaged her stomach until she was able to fall asleep.
"How do you feel?" he asked, aware of one of the babies moving beneath his large hand.
"Like there's a soccer match being played in there," she laid her hand over his and smiled. "I just wish they'd let me get a bit more sleep. Once they make their debut, that may be near impossible for a while."
"I'll be here," he reminded her. "We're in this together."
"I would hope so," she teased. "I didn't get this way all by myself."
"Always more than happy to help," Bobby chuckled, raising the water glass to his lips. The sound of the doorbell saved Charli from responding but before she could move, Bobby said: "I'll get it. Relax for a minute."
"May I help you?" Bobby opened the front door, his gaze straying first to the man before he turned his attention to the woman. She looked familiar but Bobby was certain they had never met.
"I'm looking for Jacob or Maggie Reilly," the woman spoke.
"I'm sorry, they don't live here anymore," Bobby smiled.
"Oh, I see," the woman looked to the man who stood alongside her. "You wouldn't know where I could find them, would you?"
"I'm afraid they're traveling -," Bobby began but he broke off when the realization of who the woman was hit him. "You're Carolyn Donovan."
"Travis – Carolyn Travis. Have we met?" she asked, certain that she would remember this large man standing before her.
"No, we've never met," Bobby shook his head.
"Bobby, who is it?" Charli came up behind her husband, stopping in her tracks at the sight of the woman standing before her. "What are you doing here?"
Carolyn appeared to be speechless for several moments while her gaze moved over the beautiful young woman who stood before her. Charli was barefoot, her long hair drawn back in a loose ponytail and there was no disguising her pregnancy. Tears filled the older woman's eyes as she said:
"You're even more beautiful than I imagined."
"You aren't welcome here," Charli's normally warm voice was cold.
"Charli," Bobby and Carolyn spoke in unison.
"I don't want her here," Charli looked up at Bobby. "Make her leave."
"Please, Charli, just let me talk to you," Carolyn began but Charli was already turning away. "Please."
"I'm sorry," Bobby moved to block Carolyn's entrance into the house. "Just – wait, please. Wait here." He closed the door and hurried after Charli. He found her in the kitchen, holding onto the edge of the counter. "Chuck – are you alright?"
"I can't believe she showed up here," Charli kept her back to him. "She has no right."
"She – she was looking for Jacob. I think she's just as shocked as you are right now," Bobby laid his hand on her back. "I think you should talk to her."
"Are you serious?!" Charli turned to look up at him, the pain in her green eyes tugging at his heart. "She can't possibly say anything worth hearing and I'm sure she would not want to hear what I have to say."
"Calm down, Chuck," his voice was gentle.
"Calm down? That – woman shows up here and wants to talk to me and I'm supposed to calm down?" as she spoke, Charli's voice rose and she moved away from Bobby. "Is she gone?"
"Not yet – no. I – I told her to wait."
"Well, you can just go tell her to leave."
"It can't hurt you to hear her out – and then if you want her gone, I'll make sure she leaves," Bobby replied, his brown eyes studying her face. "I don't care about her, Chuck – but if she leaves and you don't talk to her – you might regret it."
"No – I won't do it," Charli shook her head. Before she could walk away, Bobby took a gentle hold of her upper arm and turned her to face him.
"I've never known you to run from a problem."
"I didn't run from her – she ran from me and the others and never looked back!" Tears welled in her eyes, but Charli refused to let them fall.
"May – maybe she had a reason."
"Just like Harris had a reason for beating me?" Charli countered. She knew she was being irrational, but she didn't care. The sight of her mother at her front door was the one thing she never would have expected. The thought that her husband would defend the woman threw Charli for a loop.
"No, of course not," Bobby's own voice grew louder. "But – when my father walked out on us, I spent a lot of time – wondering what I had done. I blamed myself, my mother, Frank," he ran a hand over his short hair, sighing. "When he died, it was too late. I'll never know for sure what happened and I have to live with that. You – you have a chance for some closure – to know exactly why she left. If you don't talk to her – you'll never have your answers. You're the one who thought I needed to talk to Nicole – and you were right."
"I can't," she shook her head, looking up at him. "I – can't." The tears fell then and Bobby pulled her into his arms, engulfing her in a protective hug.
"Shh – it's OK," he whispered against the top of her head. "I'll be right here – I'll stay with you while you talk to her."
Charli rested the side of her face against his chest and allowed his words to sink in. He wasn't going to ask her mother to leave, he was going to insist that they talk. She found comfort in the feel of his arms around her, the warmth of him against her for several minutes before she moved away from him.
"I don't want to do this." It was a simple statement as she wiped her cheeks with shaky fingers.
"I know." Bobby replied softly, cupping her face between his hands to wipe her tears away with his thumbs. "But you need to. I love you, Chuck. I only want what's best for you."
"This isn't what's best for me," she told him sadly. "It would be best if she went back to wherever she came from and just left me alone."
"Trust me on this, please?" Bobby bent so that his gaze was level with hers and she saw the concern in his brown eyes. She opened her mouth to speak but instead a sharp gasp escaped at the pain that shot through her back. "What is it?"
"N – nothing, just my back. I've been having those spasms," she rubbed the small of her back where the pain had been. "It's gone now." Sighing, she offered her husband a sad smile. "I – You should probably let her in since you aren't going to shoot her for me," Charli hiccoughed through her tears and managed a soft chuckle.
"When you're through talking to her, if you still want me to shoot her, I will," Bobby replied with a teasing grin before dropping a kiss on her forehead. "I'll take them into the living room." He knew she needed time to compose herself before facing Carolyn.
Charli disappeared into the bathroom and studied her reflection in the mirror. Her face was puffy and red, her eyes bloodshot – she was a mess. Running the cold water, she splashed her face before dampening a washcloth to hold on her eyes for a few moments. The cloth fell in the sink, though, when another spasm gripped her back and moved around to the sides of her stomach. She gripped the counter and waited for it to pass.
Once the spasm subsided, she dried her face and took a deep breath, trying to calm her frayed nerves. She studied her reflection in the mirror, saying:
"Just get it over with – once she's gone you never have to see her again."
Charli walked slowly into the living room, aware of the silence that overcame the room at her entrance. Bobby rose from the sofa and came to her, while her mother and the man with her rose but remained where they were. Sliding his arm around her waist, Bobby said:
"Charli, this is Mitchell Travis – your mother – Carolyn's husband." He rephrased his introduction when he met Charli's gaze.
"It's a pleasure to finally meet you, young lady," Mitchell offered her his hand and a gentle smile. "Carolyn talks of you often."
"Mr. Travis," Charli stepped forward, accepting his hand. "Please, have a seat."
"Charli," Carolyn began but Charli raised her hand.
"I'm agreeing to this because of Bobby," Charli told the older woman. "If I had my way, I'd just as soon never see you again. If we're going to speak, I'd prefer it to be in private – I'm not sure you'd like your husband to hear what I have to say."
Bobby had never heard Charli speak in such a rigid manner. But he knew her well enough to know it was due to her attempts to protect herself from further hurt. Although they rarely discussed her mother, Bobby knew she was devastated by the abandonment. He turned to follow behind the two women but Charli laid a hand on his arm, shaking her head.
"If I need you, I'll call," she met his gaze and gave him a comforting smile. "I promise to behave myself."
"I'm here, Chuck."
"I know," she squeezed his arm. He kissed her softly, before she led her mother into the kitchen.
The women were only out of the room for a moment before Bobby heard the sound of something crashing in the kitchen and Carolyn Travis' voice calling:
"Charli! Please, Mitchell – help me!"
The two men hurried into the kitchen, Bobby in front of the older man. He was on his knees immediately, where Carolyn was cradling Charli's head in her lap. A chair lay on its side on the floor.
"Charli?" Bobby cupped her cheek in his hand and she winced in pain as another spasm shot along her back.
"Some – something's wrong, Bobby – the babies," she whispered, gripping his hand as the pain became unbearable.
"What should I do?" Carolyn looked from her daughter to the stranger who was her son-in-law.
"My – my truck is in the driveway – the keys are on the counter." Even as he spoke, he was lifting Charli into his arms. "Can you drive?" He looked to Mitchell.
"Yes – of course," the older man retrieved the keys. Bobby turned his attention to Carolyn as he got to his feet.
"Dr. Hawthorne is Charli's OB – her number's in my cell phone," he nodded to the charger where the phone sat. "You can call her on the way, tell her what's happening."
Carolyn grabbed the phone and followed behind them. Mitchell had the back door of the SUV opened and waiting. Carefully, Bobby maneuvered Charli onto the seat, climbing in beside her. She was clutching her stomach and her face was ashen. He pulled her close to him, laying his left hand over both of hers.
"I – I'm scared, Bobby. It's too soon." She whispered.
"It'll be OK, Charli," he pressed a kiss to her temple, praying to God he was right.