Disclaimer - I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters in it, though I wish I did.
Retaliation - Breach of the Peace
Of course, he had planned it perfectly - he always did. Every detail, every flaw corrected and then used to his own advantage. It was mostly for revenge, but a main part of it was just for the fun of it as well, for a laugh. And by God he needed a good laugh every now and again. Obviously, the victim on the recieving end of his almost dastardly plan would probably not find it funny, at least not straight away, maybe after he had time think about it. It didn't matter though, he was going to do it anyway. You see, he had been on the recieving end of a prank not so long ago by one of his fellow Marauders, one of his brothers! He had pretended to be angry about it but honestly he could see the funny side of it, although he hadn't admitted it - not even to himself. But that wouldn't stop him retaliating.
He sauntered casually into the Great Hall, smiling gleefully as he caught sight of his victim. Sirius Black you unluckly dog He thought to himself as he pointed his feet in the direction of the Gryffindor table. Taking his usual place beside his three best friends he winked at Remus and Peter as Sirius turned his attention to his latest girlfriend.
He goes through girls faster than Snivellus runs when confronted with shampoo James thought, having no idea that a very similar phrase would be uttered by a fellow prankster in the future. Moony and Wormtail smirked back as Sirius continued to flirt away with his lady friend, it was actually due to said lady friend speaking loudly two nights before that James had been able to formulate his plot.
"Well when me and Sirius were in my room last night he-" Mary Macdonald began to one of her friends, however, James interrupted her curiously.
"Sirius was in the Girls dorm?" He asked and she nodded. "But I thought guys weren't allowed in there." James asked, having attempted it many a time in his pranking past.
"Sirius said he found a way to bypass that charm in his third year." Louise, another former girlfriend of Sirius', said.
"Why does that not surprise me?" James questioned to himself before asking the girls just how a guy like himself would get into the girls dormitory.
"Easy, all you need is for a girl to hold your hand." Mary replied simply and James' confusion was evident.
"What thats all you need to do?" He cried suddenly and a few heads turned at the Gryffindor table. Mary nodded quickly as she returned to her conversation with her friends. James' lips curved up into a smile.
Oh yes, so thanks to Sirius' own girlfriend he was going to be able to make an utter fool out of his best friend. That should teach him to not go out with a loose-tongued girl like Mary Macdonald. Turning his attention back to his fellow fifth years he began to eat his breakfast. When Sirius was done chatting to his girlfriend the Marauders eventually headed for class, but James hang back from the Charms classroom while the other three went in, claiming to have to get a book off someone.
"Hey, Evans!" James whispered sharply as she made her way into the class, she left the door and came over to where James was standing by a suit of armour.
"What is it, Potter?" She asked in a sharp tone, obviously she wasn't a very morning person.
"It's tonight!" James said in an excited tone and Lily couldn't help but smile, tonight was time to teach a lesson.
"Excellent, what time?" The red-head replied in almost the same tone.
"Well, thats actually up to Sirius..." James said with a small smirk as he carefully explained that part of the plan quickly before going into charms. With Lily Evans at his side, there really was no way he could lose. As James feebly attemtped the new charm which gave small objects like mugs or glasses wings, he remembered the reason as to why Lily was really helping them.
He was talking over the plan in Gryffindor Common room near the fire with Remus and Peter when Lily Evans seemed to have heard, coming straight over to them. Probably to stop us being a Prefect and all James thought with a groan.
"Potter, am I really hearing what I think your saying?" Lily asked but not in the same enquiring tone as usual. Intrigued, James replied in a composed tone.
"That depends, my dear Lily, what were you hearing?" He asked in return with a smirk. Not wanting to play this game Lily replied instantly.
"Are you really planning a prank on Black?" She asking him quietly, but it was in curious, alsmot mischevious, tone. James eyes widened momentarily, before he got up and guided Lily to one of the chairs by the fire.
"Take a seat my dear." He said in a false sweet tone. Unusually she would frown or make a face at his tone but now she just looked extremely curious, again with that mischevious look in her beautiful green eyes. "Sirius wronged me when he shouldn't have a few days ago, I intend to exact revenge with my two comrades here." James began to explain, but it seemed Lily had already heard all of the plan he had uttered to Moony and Wormtail.
"I know, but what your saying sounds like it could help me out." Lily interrupted with a casual flick of her hair. James hid a smile and nodded for her to continue. "Ever since Black found his way into the Girls dorm I've hardly been able to get a whole nights sleep. But what your doing seems like it could keep him out of their for a while at the very least." She explained as the other three Marauders listened intently.
"So you want to teach him a lesson?" Remus asked to clarify.
"Oh yes, I've been wanting to kick him out of there for a long time." Evans said with a large smile which the three Marauder's copied.
"Excellent, we actually needed a woman but at least now we've got a willing one." James concluded happily.
So with his beloved Lily's help he was going to be able to prank his best friend. Sighing contently he eyed his red-headed love before winking at Sirius who had caught him looking, as he always did. Now that the plan was officially in action, all he had to do now was wait.
Later that evening...
Sirius Black was in a good mood. He always was at a time like this, just with his girlfriend in the corner of the common room. Doing partner-like things. Oh yes, good times. Eventually, at around eight o'clock, Mary said she had to get something from the girls dorm. Feeling a bit dissappointed he headed over to his fellow Marauder's for some company.
"Rejected, Padfoot?" James asked him with a joking smile. He grinned back.
"Nah, James mate, she's just going to the girls dorm. to get something." Sirius replied taking a seat beside them, his back turned to the Girl's Dormitory, he didn't notice Lily Evans head up after Mary.
Lily entered the girls dormitory to find Mary digging something out around her suitcase.
"Mary?" She asked with a smile.
"Oh hi, Lily." Mary replied quickly, before rooting around in her suitcase once more.
"I heard Louise was looking for you, she was in the library, said it's urgent." Lily lied easily, taking a seat on her own bed. Mary looked up.
"Well if it's urgent I better go see to her then." Mary responded before getting up and leaving. "See ya Lily." She said as she left.
"Bye." Lily said with false sweetness. As soon as Mary left she followed down after her, and made sure to walk on her side so that even if Sirius looked over he would not see her. But it seemed James was occupying his full attention with a story, as was planned. Smiling she made her way over to the four Marauders once Mary left.
"Black?" She asked in false sharpness. As Sirius turned to look at her James waved and grinned behind his back at Lily. "Mary's waiting for you upstair's, says she's got a surprise for you or something." Lily said with a forced confused frown. She knew she had played perfectly when Black's eyes immediately lit up and he turned to grin rogueishly at it friends.
"Looks like I got there quicker than I hoped." He said with a grin, before turning to head to the common room, brushing past Lily casually with a spring in his step. "Don't wait up!" He called over his shoulder as he left.
"Oh we won't." James said quietly so only the four prankster's could hear. With a grin they waited untill Sirius entered the staircase before following up after them. Both James and Remus grabbed Lily's hand and headed up the stars that for once didn't turn into a large slide, Peter staying down to keep people out, saying that someone had exploded a new range of dung-bombs on the stairs. Ones that could knock you out with the stench, on McGonagall's fake orders of course. They found Sirius lying casually on Mary's bed, obviously thinking she was in the toilet preparing for her 'surprise'.
"Prongs, Moony, Evans what-?" He began in a confused tone, sitting up.
"Stupefy!" James shot quickly at his chest. When Sirius slumped over unconcious Remus waved his wand and levitated Sirius into the girls toilets. Lily grabbed his wand from his pocket before both of them left the toilet to let James finish off the prank. "Sorry mate." He said, not at all sorry, before covering his eyes with his hand and slashing his wand easily through the air. Taking care not to look at his best friends unconcious form he retreated from the toilet and closed the door as Lily performed a basic locking spell that only a wand would be able to unlock.
"We're finished! Let's go!" Lily cried excitedly as they left, the main part of the plan over.
In a pickle...
Sirius awoke in an unfamiliar place, feeling oddly cold. Looking around he recognised them as toilets, he was in some sort of toilet facility. But it was when he noticed the pink borderline and decorations that he realised which one.
"I'm in the girls toilets!" He whispered frantically, standing up and feeling an unfamiliar draft. He looked down at himself. "Naked!" He called as he remembered what had happened.
"James!" He shouted angrily and he heard a sudden burst of muttering's from the other room.
"Is someone in there?"
"I just heard.."
"Sounded like a guy." Sirius immediately stiffened and looked around for his wand but couldn't find it. He heard the whispers continue as he tried to find some way to cover up his nakedness, finding none he resorted to covering his male regions with his hands. Eventually he heard the call which would end his solitary confinement.
"Alohomora!" He groaned out loud. Knowing that he was going to have to take this like a man he stood up staight, crossed his arms over his chest and stood waiting a few feet in front of the opening door. There was gasps and cries of shock as the six girls in front of him caught sight of his bare body. Giving them a moment to oggle at his nude form he simply nodded and stepped forward past them.
"Ladies." He greeted almost casually as they split ranks to let him past. Still with his arms crossed across his chest he knew there was only one way he could go - downstairs.
OK, so maybe stepping into the common room at it's busiest time had not been the best idea. Now that he thought about it he could have done a number of things: Waited untill midnight before sneaking out, simply borrowed one of the girl's wands and summoned his clothes. But no, he hadn't thought of that then had he. Everything stopped. Conversations, homework, games of chess. He walked quickly but proudly through the room of gaping people as he made his way to the boy's dormitory's. Spotting James, Peter, Remus and Lily Evans smiling at him he changed direction and headed over to them as the room continued to gape.
"Where are my clothes?" He asked in calm, but dangerous tone.
"In your room." James replied, looking at the ceiling.
"Where is my wand?" He asked again in a soft tone but the rest of the room could still hear.
"Well I can see it perfectly well without your clothes on Black." Evans replied silkily, taking a quick glance at his manhood. The common room burst into laughter as Sirius groaned inwardly. He really should have saw that one coming.
"Sirius Black!" Came Professor McGonagall's screech and Sirius stiffened immediately, which admittedly everyone could notice rather clearly. Sirius saw James fight to keep in a fit of laughter and knew he had brought McGonagall up here just for this, most likely under false pretence's.
"Get up to your room right now!" She cried angrily, looking anywhere but at the naked teen. Sirius nodded curtly as he did indeed tunr and head for the common room. "And five points from Gryffindor for a breach of the peace!" She shouted angrily at his bare back. Once Sirius had left everyone burst out into conversation as McGonagall continued to stare at the door which Sirius had entered, looking utterly bewildered. Eventually, she calmed and headed over to James Potter, giving him a knowing look.
"Mr. Potter?" She caught his attention and he turned round from laughing with his friends to look at the Transfiguration teacher.
"Ten Point to Gryffindor - for a breach of the peace." She said to her favourite student, laughing jovially inside at the pure hilarity of it all. James smiled. Who said revenge didn't taste sweet?