Once upon a time, there was a man named Murdoc Niccals. He always told lies and blamed others for his crooked jokes and was allover a bad man. No one trusted him because he was smelly, old and green. (Talk about profiling!) Then one day, he found out he was an immortalist via an ancient journal. He tried to tell everyone, and warn them of the future that was coming quicker than the speed of light, but he was a washed up drunk and he still smelled, and he was even greener than before. The day came where the end was upon the world, and everyone said, "How were we to know! Murdoc Niccals is an old, smelly, green liar! If only it weren't so! Maybe we would've trusted his word and attempted to stop this apocalypse that is upon us now!" Then everyone died because humans are wasteful and overpopulated the world.
The end.