A/N – This is a one-shot of my idea of what happened in Paris between Tony and Ziva. Behind the scenes of the screen and what we are shown.
NCIS, Washington, DC
"Special Agent DiNozzo and David, my office please. Gibbs, you too," Vance called from the catwalk as the sun set outside of the NCIS building.
Ziva got up from her seat and glanced at Tony. They had hardly made eye contact since their talk in the bathroom several weeks ago. They were on shaky ground and she knew it. It was like they were avoiding each other, but not really. They were only avoiding each other's eyes. Ziva knew why. Ziva didn't want Tony to read what was there, because she knew that she was only pretending she was fine and she knew that he was the only person in the world who could read it. She reached for the necklace that she used to wear almost everyday of her life, but remembered that it wasn't there. She frowned and remembered what she had said to the marine on that ship before she was in Somalia.
"I would sooner die than take it off," she told him. "You should understand." She had pulled out his dog tags."
She had not worn the necklace since Saleem had taken it off her neck and she had fully intended on dying over there. But, she no longer blamed Tony for rescuing her. Now, she was thankful for it. But, she did miss her necklace and had not had the heart to replace it with a new one, since she was not so sure how she felt about Israel at the moment or her father for that matter.
Tony glanced at Ziva after she was already up. She was frowning and her eyes said that she was far from fine. They had hardly made eye contact since that day in the bathroom where she apologized in the bathroom. It broke his heart that she was still hurting from this mess and he wished he could make it all go away for her, but he didn't know what to do to even help her cope, because she wouldn't let him in. He knew why they were avoiding each other though. Ziva didn't want Tony to know what she had been through and she obviously knew that he wanted her to talk about it. What she didn't know was that he was willing to wait to hear it.
Gibbs glanced at his two agents. He knew what Vance was doing to these two. It had been his suggestion to send them. Something had been off with them since they had saved Ziva from Somalia and the team was not quite the same. He realized that by sending them the team would never be the same, but it broke his heart to see his two agents, his two kids, having problems as they were. They wouldn't even look at each other and they had to depend on each other to have each other's backs. What was happening now was not good at all. They had to work through this somehow and this was his only chance to intervene.
They all made their way up the stairs and walked into Vance's office. They sat down one by one and looked at Vance, but not at each other. Vance could see what Gibbs meant about whatever was going on between Tony and Ziva being strained and forced. They were sitting next to each other, yes, but they were leaning ever-so-slightly away from each other now. He could see that they were strongly resisting whatever it was that they felt for each other because of whatever had happened to Ziva in Somalia.
"Okay, so I have an assignment and I've finally decided who is going to do it," Vance said. "The assignment is to go to Paris and pick up a witness for a trial. She is not wholly safe. We have reason to believe that her life is in danger from this thing. So, David, DiNozzo, you are going to Paris. Go home and pack your bags. Your plane leaves in two hours. You will get there, have a night, pick up your witness and come home. Understood?"
"Yes, sir," Ziva said.
"Yes, Director," Tony said.
"Good. Gibbs, no problems with me stealing two of your best agents?" Vance asked more as a formality than out of general curiosity because they had already discussed this extensively.
"No problems, Director," Gibbs said with a slight nod of his head.
Paris, France
"Reservation under DiNozzo," Tony said at the counter.
"Yes, that was a single room," the person at the counter said.
"Um… shouldn't it be either a double room or two rooms?" Tony asked.
"Not according to the people who booked it, nope," the manager said.
Tony and Ziva glanced at each other finally, for the first time since their eyes met in that bathroom so long ago and the second time since her face had been uncovered in Somalia. They did not think that sharing a room with one bed was a good idea. It was clear in both of their expressions.
"Is there another room available?" Tony asked.
"No, we are all booked for tonight," the manager said.
"Okay, we'll take it," Ziva said, resigned to the fact that they were going to have to share the room.
They walked up to the top floor and opened the door of the room. It was not a large room. It had one bed and a small couch. Great, it was small. It was even small by Ziva's comparison of sizes, since she was the smaller of the two.
They stood there, looking around the room. It wouldn't be so bad. But, they were definitely going to fight over who got the couch. She was going to insist on taking it and he was going to insist on being a gentleman and take it; that was the way they worked. Ziva had a solution in her head to give to him. They could share the bed. But Ziva didn't know if he would go for it. The tension between them was nearly visible at this point and they could both feel it; and, it had a hint of the old sexual tension that they used to have so prominently.
They had stepped a little ways in the room. Ziva was standing there with her bag on her arm, looking at the bed and determining that there was plenty of room for both of them. They needed to talk anyway and she knew it. They needed to do something with whatever was going on between them, because she couldn't take it anymore. She needed to have it somewhere close to the way it was again.
While Ziva was deep in thought Tony moved up behind her as quietly as he could. He was not close enough to touch her with his body, but he was still close behind her.
"I got you something, Ziva," he whispered, standing as close to her as he dared without scaring her. He was so afraid of scaring her after she had come back from Somalia.
Ziva jumped a little. She had not heard Tony come so close to her. She was surprised by the sudden closeness, but she welcomed it, it made her feel safer. She had been so jumpy since her return from Somalia so many months ago, and she hated it, but she knew that it was Tony and it was okay. Everything was getting slowly better with time, one day at a time.
She took a calming breath, reminding herself one more time that she was safe with Tony. She turned slowly to face him, wondering what he had gotten her. Her curiosity took over and she knew it was visible on her face. She allowed her walls to drop for him since they were completely alone. She felt a little too comfortable around him and it scared her.
"You startled me, Tony," she said honestly, finally meeting his eyes.
Her eyes told him that she felt safe with him there and she was thankful that he was there with her; that she would rather him than anyone else. He was relieved at the messages her eyes were sending him.
"I thought that ninjas couldn't get surprised?" Tony asked playfully, feeling that he needed to keep the mood light, even though this was definitely a serious moment.
"When we go through as much as this ninja has gone through, then, yes, Tony, sometimes we get a little surprised. I was… I was just lost in my thoughts," she said to him, fluctuating between being serious and light in the same comment, trying not to make too much of the situation; she knew it would overwhelm her if she remained serious the whole time. He knew that too, which was why he had taken to lightening the mood in that moment.
He smiled at her, seeing some of the light that used to exist in her eyes returning for the first time since her rescue, and held up a box in front of her. It was long and skinny and covered in black velvet. It was obviously for some type of jewelry. She narrowed her eyes at him as she saw the box, but her eyes remained fixed on him, as she had not allowed herself to do in a very long time. She could get totally lost in his eyes and be perfectly happy for the rest of her life.
"You did say you got me something… um, jewelry, Tony?" she asked, unsure of how to react to this gesture.
Tony studied Ziva for a few minutes and noticed that she glanced down at the box in his hands. She was asking him, silently, what was in the box. He reached his other hand out and slowly opened the box for her. She gasped slightly in surprise at what it held.
"I noticed that you lost your Star of David when you were there," he said to her quietly.
He was ignoring the fact that they never mentioned Somalia or what happened over there. He made sure that he didn't bring up the location, because he did not want to hurt her anymore than she already was. He knew that something really awful had happened to her there, but he wanted to do something to help make it right.
"I thought since it was very important to you, I would get you a new one," he added softly.
"This is really expensive, Tony," she said, noticing this new Star of David pendant had tiny diamonds laced into it, where her old one had just been plain silver. "You did not have to do this for me."
"I wanted to do it, Ziva," he said softly, holding her gaze and reading the gratitude that was in her eyes. "It means a lot to you."
She smiled up at him, with the genuine smile that he hadn't seen in so long, and took the box from him slowly. Before taking the necklace out of the box she leaned up on her toes and kissed him on the lips. They stood there for a moment with their lips pressed together, relishing the feel of each other's soft lips. Then, his hands went to her back gently and hers around his neck slowly, locking each other in their places, with gentle care as to not alarm the other or cause any panic from memories that wanted to be lost.
Tony opened his mouth and his tongue licked at her bottom lip, asking for entrance. She allowed it. Their tongues wrestled lightly with each other, exploring the other's mouth in the passionate kiss that they were sharing now. She was pouring her soul into him. She was trying to thank him for all he had done for her and trying to tell him what he really meant to her, because her words would have failed her now.
Tony was enjoying the taste that was so unique to Ziva. He had only ever tasted it in a hungry and hurried kiss for show during their undercover operation so long ago. This kiss was so different from that. He could feel all of her emotions pouring into him. She was sad, hurt, and lonely. But she loved him and wanted him to know it, but didn't know how to say it.
Tony poured everything he had into the kiss. He wanted her to know that he was not going anywhere, no matter what. He wanted her to know that he loved her and that he was always going to love her, no matter what. The kiss deepened.
Ziva could feel her body react to the contact between her and Tony, but she was not interested in going there. Tony could feel his body react to the closeness between them, but he was certainly not going to even think about going there with her now. She was still too hurt from her time in Somalia.
They pulled apart at the exact same moment and rested their foreheads together. Ziva looked down, away from him, not sure what to feel in this moment. She felt far too much. She knew that she loved him; that she was in love with him; that she, too, couldn't live without him. The emotions she was feeling scared her and made her feel safe at the same time. It was confusing to her.
Tony was afraid of what he felt for Ziva now that he had told her without words. She had returned the emotions, but he didn't know if she could handle it. He was afraid for her. She was not ready for that, and he knew it. Tony got the message though, that she loved him and was not ready for more than a thank you kiss that told him everything he ever wanted to know.
They had finally given into those emotions and desires that had built up over the years of working together and it felt great! They were both afraid though, because they had never given into each other or any other person quite like that. Tony knew, though, that she was not ready for more. He could see the fear in her eyes, even though she was looking away from him.
"Thank you, Tony," she whispered, giving him a last longing look.
They had fallen asleep with their back to each other, careful not to invade each other's personal space, having a new respect for one another. Tony was half awake at the time it happened. He could hear her muttering and he opened his eyes and listened hard. He knew instantly that she was having a nightmare.
He listened to her as she muttered in Hebrew. He looked over his shoulder and saw how peaceful she looked asleep. Her face suddenly contorted as though in an expression of pain and it broke his heart. She groaned as though something unpleasant were happening to her and she continued to mutter. Then, he caught the word Saleem.
"Ziva," he whispered, but she continued to mutter. He reached out and touched her arm gently. "Ziva. It's okay. I'm here. It's Tony. I'm in Paris with you. It's okay."
Her eyes shot open and looked at him. She sat bolt upright in the bed, nearly hyperventilating and sweating. Tony sat up next to her and moved a little closer to her. He put one hand on her shoulder very gently and very slowly, knowing that one wrong move would mean that he would die.
"Ziva. It's okay. You are in Paris with me. It's Tony. We are here to pick up a witness, which we will do tomorrow. It's just me, Tony. You are safe. Saleem is dead and gone. He can't hurt you anymore, Ziva. You are safe," he whispered gently to her.
Ziva leaned into his warm and comforting touch. She turned to see him and moved the rest of the way to meet him, breaking down in tears for the first time in front of him. She rested her head in the crook of his neck and sobbed there. He could feel the wetness of her tears and he held her tight to his body while she cried it out.
"It was just a nightmare," she said to him, when she was more under control. "I am okay now."
At least she did not say she was fine. He knew she wasn't fine and she knew that he knew it. He laid back with her still in his arms and she snuggled into his side, allowing herself to rest her head on his chest like a pillow.
She placed a hand over his heart, while his arms remained wrapped around her. She didn't fail to notice that they fit perfectly in each other's arms, like they were made for each other. His arms were wrapped around her and protecting her and her body was all over him. She felt safe where she was and she smiled into his chest.
"Thank you, Tony," she whispered on more time that night and fell asleep that night.
Ziva awoke and noticed that Tony was behind her with his arms wrapped around her. He was not sleeping, but she did notice that he was hard in her back. She didn't move. She enjoyed the feel of Tony around her, protecting her. She had not had a decent night of sleep since long before she went to Somalia. She did not care that her body was aching for him and she did not care that his body was probably aching for her. She had him right now and she had someone who was keeping her safe. She placed her hand on top of his and snuggled back into him a little more.
Tony was the only person in the world that she would trust in this position. He could not know how happy she was to be here with him right then. She smiled to herself as his arms pulled her closer to him. They laid their like that for a long time. She could feel Tony's face buried into the nape of her neck and she smiled as he snuggled her. She was okay with this, because it was Tony. After a while, though, her body was in pain from want of him and she needed to go take a shower and clear her head.
He let her go when she got up and their eyes met. They would not speak of this night again with anyone else. They would go back to what they were and they would joke and laugh and that was the way they were going to cope, because she was not ready for anything more than that right now. She was perfectly happy with having a friend who was there for her whenever she needed it.
They needed to go get that witness, Ziva remembered. She needed a shower too, so she finally tore her eyes away from Tony's indefinite green eyes. She walked toward the bathroom, feeling far better than she ever had before. Maybe, someday she could have happiness, with him. But, that day was not today. She vowed that before she died she would talk to Tony about what had happened last night and yesterday. But that day was not anytime soon.