Author's Note: (2015) Hello everyone! This is an updated version of Chapter 1. This fanfic is canon but I've taken the liberty of tweaking some facts. Enjoy!

Nothing belongs to me.

Chapter 1: Arrival

I am on a British train headed for London. The people here call it a tube. I'm miserable and lonely and I look out a window. The scenery moves past me, sliding like I used to on the Yangtze River banks when I was a child. I let myself cry for one second, no more, no less before loosening my body posture and slouching slightly. I see a man looking at me from across the train. He looks my age. I wish I could talk to him but they warned me about making friends. I should know by now to accept the life I have. Maybe one day I will have to chance to live another life. This one is too wrong, spiraling furiously like an acrobat's ribbon, until it stops and slams onto the ground.

Maybe I can talk to him, just for a little while before I get off at London and begin another life. We will never see each other again, and he will forget a girl he talked to on a train. I, on the other hand, might never forget the time I felt free. I can't be tempted. I need to be careful. I can never let my guard down. I could never forget what others have down for me five years ago to get here, and the hell I left behind. But still, I glance at him out of the corner of my eye. I've never seen a man like him so close. The black of the world I escaped instilled in me a longing for color. I look again. This time, he sees me. I quickly look away. As I rest my head against the window I see his face fall. I close my eyes, and then open them. He has started to read a newspaper. I close my eyes once again and let my mind wander.

"Mommy, mommy! Look at how fast I can go!" I yelled as I bellyflopped onto the soft river bank of the Yangtze River. I shrieked as the mud splattered me as I slide down the bank.

"Soo Lin! Stop it! Zhi Zhu, go get your sister before she gets hurt."

I heard my mother but I didn't want to stop. We couldn't afford toys so sliding on the banks was entertainment. I stopped as I heard Zhi Zhu running after me.

"Soo Lin, don't make Mummy upset. Let's catch bugs instead, okay?"

I loved my gege. He took care of me, whenever Mother had to leave. He talked to me when I was bored, and invented games so I wouldn't ask why Mother always stayed in bed. Then when Mother left permanently and went up to the Heavens, he kept us off the streets. He found us shelter and food when our last parent had gone. I loved him so much.

Suddenly, I feel someone's hand on my arm. I gasp and jerk my arm away as I turn around, accidentally hitting my elbow against the metal frame of the window. I ignore the throbbing. It's the man.

"Sorry." He stammers. His face is pink with embarrassment and he has drawn his hands up in defense.

I glare at him. How dare he touch me?

"What are you doing?" I ask through clenched teeth. They were right about foreign men. I couldn't let my guard down ever again.

"I was going to offer you tissues." He's turning redder. "You were crying."

Me? I was not crying. I touch my face; it's wet from tears. I look away.

"Here." He places a tissue on the seat next to mine.

"Thank you." I murmur.

He stays for a moment as if he wants to say something but then walks away. I sigh. I would have to adjust to this country as its mannerisms. My home country was not a place of touches and warm embraces and the life I led was one of fear and survival. I would have to be on my guard. He was a nice man but others might not be so kind. I was crying on a public train. How childish. A life of crime and I am still soft as a child. As the train gets closer to London with each stop, I wonder about my new life here. I will have a good job and a big apartment. It feels like a dream.

The train soon stops in London and people start to get off. People look at me in surprise but then move on. I have no luggage, no possessions of my own. All the clothes I've collected over the years are on my person, layered so I would be warm on the journey here. My thick, shapeless clothes were helpful for blending in the night but they are not helpful now when few look like me and anyone can be one of them in daylight or nighttime. I have to make sure I can't be found now that I've finally left. If they take me again, I would be reduced to nothing, having to beg my brother for help. But this time he might not help; this time he might come instead to collect his debt. I wrap my jacket closer to me and quicken my steps. My head down, and my arms crossed, I walk up to the streets of London.