Story of a Frog and a Wolf.
By: JohnsFuentes(Greninjohns)
This story will satirize the infamous wolf on the internet, Verlisify, who's contributions to the Pokémon community include posting misleading guides on the usage of Pokémon, including but not limited to Heavy Slam Wailord, focus sash Aggron, fury cutter Venusaur, his elementary level of ranting against Smogon, encouraging suicide by the suggestion of consuming base liquids, and generally speaking, a highly condescending furry. He will be interacting with in my opinion, the complete invert of his character, Greninjohns, a somewhat confused but hard-working individual who tries not to take Pokémon too seriously due to his adult age and growing responsibilities, is not famous, and plans on doing more of himself in the future.
Character References (SFW)
Verlisify the Wolf: user/verlis/ (Main Furaffinity page)
((Oh, you should check out his ex who has a Bachelor's in Media Arts and Animation. She even does commissions. ^_^ user/caninehybrid/ ))
Greninjohns the Frog: view/18716978 ((Careful where you look. If you click on my account, have one yourself and logged in, you're going to see porn in my favorites…yeah.))
Let's begin.
It was another long day for Greninjohns, who often complained about working outside pushing all the carts at Wal-Mart, restocking the shelves, helping customers unload their gorceries into their cars, and overall, eating shit from retail as always. Though the work paid decently, he was well on track with what he was wanting to do with himself. He loves what he does and plans on being a store manager, CEO, or something else relating to that; though he admits it takes a lot of his time and energy. At 19 years old, he's still is having a hard time dealing within the transition from being a child to an adult. Greninjohns can't enjoy much at the moment like he normally could when he was younger and was somewhat ignorant about handling money, taking care of his source of transportation, his mountain bike, cooking meals, and all the other little things needed to survive. Still, it was all worth it; he is proud of himself of where he is and it kept him going.
It was already fairly dark outside when his shift ended, clutching his Gengar bag he bought from Spencers some time ago onto his shoulder. Where his yellow, slightly worn bike laid against the wall near the sliding doors, he unlocked the lock attached to the back tire and hanged it at the side of the handlebars. He pushed the bike out towards the street before hopping on for a ride. His new home isn't really that bad…although his room mate isn't, let's just say, pleasant to be around. After what seemed to be a length trip of hitting the sideways, crossing through unsafe traffic, he made it home. It was rather small for a micro-studio apartment, just was a square box with a bathroom that had a almost decent working shower, a little kitchen with a sink, stove, ridge, shoved into a crowded mess at a corner, and one big bedroom. I grabbed my keys from my jean pockets and inserted the house one into the doorknob, sighing knowing that I have finally made it. I turned the knob, don't question how, and finally stepped inside.
Greninjohns steps inside the tiny hut of a home, dropping his things and placing his bike against the wall where he usually sleeps: one the floor at the other side of the room. As he settles down, taking off his reflective vest and putting his things away, Verlisify is at his desk, preparing another thumbnail with Adobe Photoshop for his next guide on how to use a Pokémon. Cans of G-Fuel lay scattered all over his desk and floor, his 3ds flipped upside down and closed on his desktop computer, in short, it wasn't the most appealing desk space to be at. Greninjohns curiously gave a glance on the screen, noting that today's Pokémon he'll be reviewing is Chansey judging by the cropped image of one on his monitor. It is pasted onto a black and red backdrop, where he then with a few mouse clips, inserted "meme" text beside it and adding a tilted "OP" watermark that sits slanted at an angle that seems laughable above the Pokémon on the right-hand side. Johns shrugs this, nothing to expect anything different from the wolf, sitting down on the floor as he slowly opens his own laptop computer, just, well…let's not discuss what he's browsing.
A few clicks, more clicks, and some more echoes throughout the room as they sat separated in silence. Johns was well likely to do his, umm, thing before going to bed in the privacy of the bathroom he shared, deciding to close his computer for the night and getting himself ready to go to bed, unfolding his comforter onto the brown, stained carpet and grabbing another and adjusting his pillow and…moving towards the bathroom. Suddenly, a loud, startling noise erupted from Verlis' snout, as his microphone was now close to his mouth.
"Welcome back wolf pack, and today, we're going to review…"
His voice paused for just a bit, enough for Johns to move away from his set up, heading towards to location to attend to his…ummm, stress relieving business.
"Chansey!"
Johns was caught distracted, freezing on the spot and looking towards Verlisify's direction. He had a slight variation of a set he created himself while he had read some of the Smogon's usage guides. The thought of wanting to share it to the Poketuber's audience entertained him a bit, but alas, it wickers away, as he turned around to face the door a few feet away.
"We're going to try something a bit different today. Guys, I have a roommate who's crazy about Pokémon, and I'm, Planning to introduce him just for today! He's going to contribute to our guide. Now, hey, Johns?"
The wolf turned his office chair around, looking at his still body as it stood statured. Johns turned around, looking back to him, still processing, wait is he really, no seriously, he just invited him to contribute to his guide. He began to speak back in return.
"Yeah…?"
"Do you wanna to start off with the first set for Chansey?"
His eyes glared a sizzling, strained shade of red. Note the wolf's skinny, un-athletic structure of his frame, his veins pulsing disgustingly near his neck and mouth, the mouth foaming slightly at the side of his mouth, indicating a extreme symptom of sleep deprivation, only wearing his favorite andonly pink shirt and a dark pair of briefs which compressed at his…erm, what was Johns about to do just a minute ago?
"I guess…"
Verlis immediately stood off from the chair, his large, matted tail swinging back and forth in excitement, or perhaps, the heart failing amounts of caffeine circulating in his bloodstream as his dog collars vibrates comparatively to a Temmie, an Undertale NPC. He invites him to sit down and in turn, Johns did so, clicking and interacting with the teambuilder on Pokémon showdown.
"Well, it's not really different from what Chansey is normally used in OU, but ummm…"
Johns worked out the EV spread, gave it the pre-evolution item like normal, inserted the proper nature, and in time, he was done with the first set for the Wolf's video.
"Alright, well you see, I like Chansey's role in the game. So I'm sticking with the cleric approach with Wish, Thunder Wave, and lastly, heal bell. Now the forth move, as some of you are seasoned in battling singles, is Counter. Now I like to point out the Seismic Toss is generally a good move to have on it, but from my own experience, Counter has much more usability in my experience. If you have Chansey out, and your opponent uses a Bisharp, you're going to think 'I should switch, it's gonna use knock off to remove that item', right? If you use Counter, it deals twice the amount of damage as your opponent did to you. Complaining about Chansey's defense? It has possibility the largest HP base stat out there. Since Counter is HP based damage, more than likely, that Bisharp, or anything really that uses a physical move will be OHKO'd, no questions asked, unless of course, it's a ghost type you're up against. Well, that's about-"
Verlisify's expression on his reluctant face turned furious, his fist clenched at his side as his eyes dilate unevenly, about ready to explode in plentiful amounts of salt.
"GET THE FUCK OFF MY CHAIR, YOU SMOGON WORSHIPPER!"
Johns, looked at him in annoyance, angry having to deal with the rage uncalled for. He had dealt with enough yelling, which was hardly any, but regardless, upset with the bad wolf, moving away from the chair and heading towards the bathroom yet again.
"WHERE THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?!"
He sighs, just staring back at the rabid wolf motionless as his voice went a bit softer, intentionally trying to egg him additionally. He sat back onto his chair.
"What do you want now?"
"I want you to stop listening to those Smogon Elitists and actually listen to my OG strats. Guaranteed to break the meta! Watch and learn."
He opened another slot, creating his own Chansey set as I just stand there, even more stressed out. All Johns wanted to do is fap and go to bed!
"Look, with a good trick room setter, like Sableye, you can use Chansey in VGC Doubles, the legal and only acceptable format to play professionally in Pokémon. Once you have trick room, give Chansey a scope lens. Running plus nature Attack, negative speed is ideal for this strat. Now as we all know, serene grace is the best ability in the meta, which guarantees 100% HAX 60% percent of the time. Give Chansey rock slide, which flinches everyone while landing the hits, yeah, and give it Egg bomb for massive STAB along with Wild Charge. THAT IS HOW TO USE CHANSEY THE RIGHT WAY."
Johns can't take this idiot anymore, the wolf looking and impersonating a COD MLG on his face. Since he can't deal with the stress anymore, he raised his webbed hand at the shaggy animal and backhands the shit out of his face.
"You pathetic furry! Don't you understand why all these things are happening to you? First you get "victimized" by Smogon, had your Girl-friend dumped you, who by the way, has her shit together with a B.A from College, I mean. How are you trying to impress? Me? Yourself? ANYONE!? WELL FUCK YOU, YOU'RE TAKING A FUCKING KID'S GAME TOO DAMN SERIOUSLY MEANWHILE I'M BUSTING MY ASS OFF FROM WORK AND SCHOOL TO GET MY LIFE TOGETHER! Damn it, do you not listen to yourself speak? You sound LIKE AN IDIOT. If Pokémon didn't become popular, you very well would just starve… fuck you, don't even dare to tell me to drink a poisonous substance."
He veered away from the delusional animal and slams the bathroom shut, proceeding to do his thing, frustrated, annoyed, and questioning why he's like this. It won't be long before he moved into his own room, his own place, his home…
SQUIRT.