I do not own My Little Pony: Friend is Magic or any characters associated with it.

This is part 1 of a multi-chapter story, so I'm just feeling my way through here.

Don't forget to review!

The Bachelor

Big Mac was by no means a pony of wealth and status. He had the Apple farm, of course, handed down to from his great-grandfather, to his grandfather, to his father, to him. It was a hard life that left Big Mac's muscles aching as he unhooked his yoke at the end of each day and made him glad when he could climb into a bathtub filled with hot water by Granny Smith. But would he change it if he could? Would he have become something different? Maybe working in Ponyville, or Canterlot? When he had been a colt, he'd dream of becoming one of Princesses Celestia's famous royal guards but that was just that: a dream. He had never had the chance like Applejack to go to Manehattan to live with their wealthy aunt and uncles, the Oranges, and if he would, would he have gone?

Big Mac paused on that thought as he unhitched his yoke, placing it next to the front door of the house.

No.

It would have been wrong to have left Granny Smith by herself, and the farm needed people to take care of it. It had been a gift from Princess Celestia herself and to walk away from that would have been more shameful then anything Big Mac could think of. And besides, he reckons the city would have driven him crazy.

Big Mac shook himself, trying to ease the heavy pain in his left shoulder. If it didn't get any better, he would need to go to the hospital where the smells, as he remembered when Apple Bloom had been born, would drive him mad.

Big Mac smiled.

Apparently a number of things would drive him crazy.

"What'cha been doin' out here sweetie?" Granny Smith asked, pulling him from his thoughts. She was standing in front of the door, the long years of life and kindness etched upon her face.

"Thinkin' is all," Big Mac said, walking into the house as Granny stepped aside. He could see the kettles on the wood stove starting to scream as the water boiled. Big Mac visibly relaxed upon seeing them. Granny Smith clucked her tongue, closing the door and walking over to the stove.

"Thinkin' can be dangerous," Granny Smith said, wrapping a towel around the handles and bringing them to the metallic bathtub that she had dragged into the middle of the kitchen.

"Eeyup,"

"Were you thinkin' about a girl?" Granny Smith asked, pouring a second kettle of water into the bathtub. Steam was filling the air of the kitchen. It made Big Mac's throat tickle.

"Nnnope,"

Granny Smith clucked her tongue again.

"Ya'know… maybe ya'll start thinking about settling down, making some fillies," Granny Smith said as Big Mac lifted a foot and tentatively placed it in the boiling, steaming water. He grimaced as it burned his hoof.

This wasn't the first time Granny Smith had brought up marriage.

"Now Granny, you know better then to start on that," Big Mac said, moving to the side as Granny poured in a kettle of cold water from the pump.

"There are lots of ponies in town, why, I can remember when your grandpa first asked me out to walk to town, I was a wee filly of fourteen…"

Big Mac sighed as he stared at the bath longingly.

This could take a while.

"And you're grandpa, why he was as strong as an ox, that's where you get your strength from, sweetie,"

"Eeyup,"

"And while we were walkin' to town, we were harassed by a pack of fierce timberwolves,"

"Eeyup,"

"And your grandpa, why, he got in there and kicked off all them timberwolves, scaring them away. I ain't been so scared since I had been a filly and had wandered into Everfree Forest lookin' for apples,"

"Eeyup,"

"But I knew at that moment, that I'd marry that pony, and in six months, we were married proper." Granny Smith finished; a far away look in her eyes.

"Eeyup,"

Granny smith glanced at Big Mac and smiled.

"Now don't you worry nuthin, I know you and Applejack are busy workin' them fields, so you just leave the wife findin' up to me."

Big Mac stared at granny smith, his eyes wide.

"Granny, you don't need to—"

"Oh don't worry, sweetie, after all, it is tradition. Now get in your bathtub," Granny Smith said, pouring the last kettle of cold water into the tub and turning back to the stove. He could smell apple sauce start to cook and Big Mac resisted the urge to groan as he stepped into the bathtub and sank into the water and pushed aside Granny's idea of marriage.

She'd probably change her mind at least six times before bedtime, and then forget all about this conversation by morning.

At least, that was what he hoped.

When morning came, however, everything was different.

Apple Bloom was sitting at the table covered with letters nearly as tall as the ceiling, a wide grin on her face as Big Mac stumbled into the room.

Uh oh.

"Bloom?" Big Mac asked uncertainly, the ache in his shoulder worse then it had been last night. And then he spied it.

The Foal Free Press was folded neatly next to her.

"Bloom?" Big Mac asked, again, feeling panic bubble in his throat as Apple Bloom continued to grin. She said nothing. He looked at the front of the paper.

There was a picture of him preparing for the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000, decked out in goggles, a determined look on his face. Above the picture in bold letters was written 'Most Eligible Bachelor of Equestria Seeks Wife'.

"Granny Smith said we needed to find you a wife, so we're gonna find you a wife!" Apple Bloom chirped just as Applejack kicked the door open and slammed it shut. There was a throng of mares outside all clamoring to get in. Applejack marched over to Big Mac, pressing her forehead to his.

"You just had to ask Granny Smith to get married, you just had too!" Applejack spat. "There's a line up of ponies from here to Canterlot building all day, and they want to marry you! How am I supposed to run a farm when we've got so many dang people here!?"

Big Mac stared at Applejack while Apple Bloom bounced around the two of them.

"We're gonna have a wedding, we're gonna have a wedding!" Apple Bloom cried.

Big Mac glanced behind Applejack, to the lace covered window, and saw the line, and all the mares chattering excitedly to one another. He looked again at the pile of letters; he would hazard a guess were marriage proposals,

Big Mac stepped back, then another step back, then another, and raced upstairs and back to his room, locking the door and crawling underneath his bed, praying that this was just a bad dream and he would wake up soon.

"Now don't take too long, sweetie, there's a couple of nice girls just waitin' to meet'cha," Granny Smith called from the other side of the door, and Big Mac whimpered in fear.

Okay, this started out completely differently, but then I had this idea, and then that idea held me hostage so this is the result.

Comments? Suggestions? Please review!