The Ladder
I don't own Naruto, Naruto is the property of Kishimoto Masashi and is not my intellectual property. There is no financial gain made from this nor will any be sought. This is for entertainment purposes only.
Baby Days Year One
In the hospital of Konohagakure a black haired young woman was on her third hour of labor, her bright blue eyes shone a faint ethereal glow as the room around her quaked, and the florescent light of the hospital room flickered with each stab of pain and each labored push of the young woman.
"Y-you're doing very well Ruqa-san, I can already see the head!" The doctor stammered in slight fear of the woman he was helping give birth.
The woman's glowing blue eyes shone brighter as she screamed louder, the muscles on her neck bulging with strain. "D-damn you for leaving me Danuja, you should have been here!" Ruqa cried as hot tears fell down her pale cheeks.
One of the nurses trying to hold the laboring woman steady was suddenly pushed away by an invisible force, flinging the medic into the wall causing the older woman to groan in pain upon impact.
"Ruqa-san you need to focus, you're letting your powers go out of control, the baby could be hurt if you don't reign it in!" The doctor ordered.
Ruqa nodded before closing her eyes, she tried to control her breathing and with great effort the quaking room began to settle and the lights stopped flickering. The laboring woman slowly opened her eyes, her ocean blue eyes no longer glowing.
The doctor smiled gently, "good now, one more push and he should be all out, ready miss Okamura?" He asked carefully.
Ruqa nodded and began to control her berthing, "I…I'm going to push now," her voice now more gentle than it was a moment ago.
The doctor nodded, "okay…one…two…three…push!" He yelled.
Ruqa pushed with all her might, forcing new life into the world though her will and pain, a minute later the blue eyed woman was relieved by the sound of a baby's wail.
The doctor carefully took the babe into his arms and gently handed him to the nurses for cleaning. "Congratulations Ruqa-san, it's a boy like you suspected, you'll be able to hold him in just a moment." He said with a big smile.
Ruqa was exhausted after hours of labor, she fell back unto her bed tiredly, "that's good," she mumbled, her face growing paler.
The doctor quickly went over the woman with a diagnostics jutsu, "shit, nurse she's losing too much blood I need help over here!" He yelled in alarm.
One of the nurses quickly scrambled to his side and began to aid the doctor in an attempt to save the woman's life, "doctor, her old injury to her heart, the labor must have aggravated it she's having a heart attack!" The nurse informed.
"Damnit we're losing her, Ruqa stay with us, stay with your son!" The Doctor plead as his hands glowed bright green over her heart.
Ruqa's eyes felt heavy, she weakly lifted her arm and pointed to the small bundle held by another nurse, "D-Danuja…after h-his father, d-don't die on your wife like he did... be…good…I L-love you" Ruqa said to her newborn son, the blue eyed woman gently closed her eyes, not for the first time but for the last time, wishing that things were different.
He was pissed, no he wasn't just pissed, he was beyond livid!
Years of planning out the fucking drain, he had done so much, he was on the precipices of achieving his dreams, he had gained his millions, built an empire! How in the hell was he supposed to know that the very first person he ever burned would show back up out of the blue and pop one in his chest, how could he not see it, how could his guards be so incompetent, why did he chose today of all days not to wear that fucking vest!?
He supposed it was God's justice, or Karma, or he was just plane unlucky, but damnit if it didn't piss him off. He would never accept this, dying like some random shmuck of the streets, that was the impressionable lower class youth's job not his damnit!
He expected many things after his world went black, he expected a pit of fiery despair and pain, he expected to see all the people he fucked over and all of the mistakes he made to come, literally and metaphorically, biting him in the ass.
What he didn't expect was to wake up in a comfortable bed, breathing in fresh air instead of sulfur, and not being burning hot but a nice comfy warm.
"What in the God damn?" He questioned.
He tried to sit up but his body was sluggish to respond and his head felt like it was tied to a pile of bricks. "Did I survive…am I waking up from surgery?" That felt right, he did feel exhausted, so he figured he might as well just let his body heal and rest, he'll get some of his guys to deal with his would be killer later.
"Charley you wonderful bastard," he thought to himself as he sucked on a woman's teat. Charley, that crazy wildcard, only he would pay a hooker to breast feed a man recovering from major surgery.
It was strange though, how this woman was so tall and how he felt so small, and the fact that his dick wasn't working was concerning but he chocked that up to the anesthesia and dehydration. "It's a nice thought, but I'm not into the whole giantess and mommy fetish, but hell id probably had done the same," he mused.
Suddenly he was pulled away from the teat and the woman manhandled him, "okay bitch that's enough!" He tried to say but all that came out was gurgles and drool, "fuck these muscle relaxers or good shit," He thought dizzily before the giant of a woman gently struck him twice on the back causing him to burp.
A sudden wave of exhaustion hit him and he soon found himself closing his eyes and falling asleep without a second thought.
"Okay, okay, okay, now shit is getting really weird," He thought, he hadn't realized it until now, probably because this is the longest he's been awake for what seems like days or even weeks. But for some reason everyone, and he means everyone, is speaking Japanese.
"Are the fucking Yakuza behind this, did they hijack the ambulance and bring me to wherever they're hiding nowadays, and why in the fuck is everyone so damn big?" He wondered.
His vision had slightly recovered, he could see shapes a lot better and for some reason a giant woman loved to get right in his face, which allowed him to see her pale skin, dark brown eyes, and black hair.
He hopped he was hallucinating, that this was all just an elaborate dream created by a medically induced coma. But he felt in the back of his mind that this wasn't a dream, he remembered things too clearly and too regularly for this to be a dream, and every dream he ever had where he realized he was dreaming his subconscious fought hard to regain control.
He felt none of the tale tell signs that he was indeed dreaming, with what little muscle control he had left he force his fingers into his field of few, he counted ten fingers even, if this was a dream he wouldn't be able to count his fingers, it was one of the tricks he knew about to help train your brain for lucid dreaming.
"Not a dream, and my thought are too coherent to be a hallucination," He reasoned, but that left only one option that he could think of, one illogical and frankly very sacrilegious option.
He was a baby again, he was reincarnated, and he was reborn in Japan or at least a Japanese speaking home, he felt like he should be freaking out. But… "but how many times have I said if I could do it over again I would have done it better, if I was five, ten, twenty years younger, if I could take the wisdom that I have now and go back in time…" His musings dispersed when he heard a door open.
"Oshi-san how is little Danuja-kun doing?" He heard a female voice ask politely, his yearly work trips to Japan and years of learning the language coming in handy in this peculiar situation.
"Well behaved and quiet as ever, thank Kami for small merciless," another, yet younger sounding female voice replied.
"That's wonderful, could you help me get the older children ready, the academy's reopening today and for most of them this will be the first time going without their parents," the first woman asked somberly.
"Of course Yonono-senpai," the younger woman replied respectfully.
With that the two woman left him alone in the small nursery, "I guess my new name's Danuja now," He mused.
Danuja smiled at his latest triumph, after what felt like a month he had finally regained his mastery over the art of crawling, but that was not what he was so gleeful about. No it was the dozen wooden blocks that he had so carefully placed an top of each other to make a block tower. To other's this would not be an accomplishment, but to him this meant that he was slowly but surely regaining his motor skills.
Danuja laughed maniacally at the wooden obelisk, the monument of his skill, the first accomplishment of many. "hehehehe, my name is Danuja king of kings, look upon my works ye be mighty and despair!" He declared inwardly.
"Uhh, Yonono-senpai, Danuja's doing it again," the voice of Oshi called out from the door behind him.
Danuja looked back at a girl in her late teens standing in the doorway, Oshi was a simply dressed girl who wore a dark brown skirt that fell to just below her knees and a brown long sleeved top to match. Her dirty blond hair was tied into a bun and had rectangular glasses, giving the young woman a librarian- esque look.
"Calm him down before things start flying everywhere, I don't know if he's anything like his mother but Kami forbid he gets too exited around other children," The older voice of Yonono echoes out from somewhere beyond the nursery room.
Oshi begins walks carefully towards him, not quite in fear, but more like approaching a wild animal, more cautious than fearful.
Danuja is curious by the display of caution, every time he got a bit exited they did their best to 'calm him down' like he was a bomb waiting to go off.
He decided to ignore the teenager, he was a thirty five year old man for Christ's sake, he could handle his emotions, not his fault that he liked to over exaggerate when expressing himself. Danuja turned his back on the young woman and carefully tried to stack another block onto the top, the structural foundation wasn't the best, and he was already pushing it with ten blocks, but damn it did he want to use all of em.
He gently attempted to stand, his baby bones not quite fused together yet making it hard to stabilize himself. "Carefully, carefully, come on, I almost got it, almost there, almost there," His eyes were locked in concentration, his little baby tongue poking out of his mouth as his arm slowly reached for the top of his wooden tower.
He was just a hair of an inch short and suddenly the wooden tower fell along with Danuja, "ahh!" He shouted in alarm.
But just before his head could impact the floor and possibly brain damaging him for life, he felt a pair of hands grab him just a few inches off the ground.
"Sage's eyes Danuja-chan be more careful, you scared me half to death!" Oshi admonished.
Danuja kept himself from scowling at what just happened, yes he felt grateful to the young woman for saving his life, but that was part of the problem, he hated being indebted to anybody. "I'm going to have to pay her back for this…fuck me and my bleeding heart…whatever I'll bother with it when convenient." Danuja mused.
"Come on let's get you a diaper change," she said with a sigh before picking him up.
"Oh…" he realized, "I pissed myself," that was embarrassing, he really needed to get his muscle control back, getting his diaper changed by a girl old enough to be his daughter just didn't sit right with him.
The Matron of the Orphanage, Yonono, reminded him of an old elementary school teacher that was half phoning it in because her retirement was around the corner and was half newly made grandmother who found her love for children again. The heavy set black haired woman with rounded glasses and a black kimono tied together by a blue obi, had her good days and her bad days.
On some days he saw that she truly felt sorry for the dozens of newly created orphans that found their way into her orphanage. But on other days when he escaped from the nursery he found the woman crying to herself alone in her office, on those days she was much more strict and harsher when it came to 'calming him down' if he showed his emotions too much. She never laid a hand on him, but he did think that raising her voice that often and at such a loud volume was a bit uncalled for. "Not my fault that her menopause is acting up," he would think to himself.
From the word that he had gotten around the orphanage when he escaped his cursed prison called a nursery. He had discovered that the village he was apparently home to, was attacked fairly recently, or it was a natural disaster, it varied on who you were talking to, some people even claimed that the thing that attacked the village was the fucking Kyuubi!
He had a nice laugh when he heard that, at least there were some Naruto fans in this place, his favorite anime and manga series was a guilty pleasure of his that helped to kept him sane during those days in juvenile hall. He still went back to It on occasion even after the manga ended when he was eighteen.
But weather the village he was in was actually attacked or some natural disaster struck wasn't really his problem right now. Actually to him, social norms and obligations could go fuck themselves for the time being, he was going to enjoy his vacation as a little baby for as long as he can.
"Fuck, ass, tit, balls, shit, piss!" He cursed inwardly at each stumble he took, learning to walk again was a bitch and a half Danuja discovered.
Yonono was apparently having one of her good days as she was crouched down on the other side of the nursery, gently encouraging him with every step. "Yeah she means well but does she have to sounds so God damn condescending?" Danuja questioned.
With one last step he stumbled into the thick lunch lady arms of the heavy set woman, Yonono picked him up with a proud smile on her face and gently gave him a small kiss at the top of his head.
Despite himself Danuja felt a smile creep up on his face, finding it impossible to keep up his former persona against the sheer positivity that the woman exuded.
"I'm going to have to punch a lot of trees to get my manhood back, but once again fuck it, I'm a baby now bitch and I can do what I want," He reasoned.
"I am surrounded by morons," Danuja lamented as the now one year old is sitting in the middle of a different nursery in the orphanage filled with six other children around his physical age.
All around him babbling children crawled around or attempted in vain to walk, all drooling, or pissing, or shitting themselves. He didn't mind kids when he was an adult, but being amongst them as a peer? Fuck that, he wanted out of this cursed nursery "for the love of Mary and Joseph get me out of here!" he cried as a black hair boy a year older than he was bumped into him and began to wail like he had been decked in the gonads.
Said wailing child caused a cascade effect as more children began to cry because the sound of the other child hurt their ears, and because those children cried even more children cried. Danuja could only hoist himself up onto his feet and slowly make his way to the door that was warded off by the wooden baby gate.
Oshi came rushing towards the door in worry, she looked down to see all the other children crying and the lone Danuja not so much as sniffling, only looking positively annoyed. Oshi sighed heavily, as she looked down at the only silent child, "Did you do this Danu-chan?" She questioned.
Danuja looked up at her and shook his head.
Oshi looked taken aback, for a brief moment at Danuja answering her question she then shook her head and made to deal with the most pressing issue.
The young woman then pulled up her arms and crossed her fingers in a hand sign that was oddly familiar to Danuja. "Okay, just like I practiced, I have enough for one clone, so…split the chakra in half and…" with a puff of smoke an exact replica of Oshi appeared right next to her, said teenager looked toughly impressed with herself, "ha still got it," she said aloud.
As Oshi busied herself and her clone with calming the children, Danuja couldn't keep his jaw from hitting the floor, "What…the…fuck," he wondered in astonishment. "That was the fucking Shadow Clone Jutsu…O God…O fuck…either Charley put some real good shit in my IV at the hospital and have been kidding myself this entire time or…or I'm in Naruto."
He couldn't believe it, he almost refused to believe it, he wanted to reject this reality, but as he saw two exact clones of Oshi and her previous mention of chakra just a minute ago rang in his mind. He couldn't help but think to himself, "O this just got so much more interesting," Danuja couldn't help the small conspiratorial smirk appear on his lips.
Yet another story that I wrote up on less than five hours of sleep, but this one is a bit more of a fun one rather than my other more serious takes on the Naruto universe.
O yes this will have its serious moments, I love myself some drama, but I think this would have a bit more humor to it than other stories.
This is not a Self insert, this is an original character with his own bloodline. Well I say it's his own bloodline but there are a few powers similar to what he can do that already exist but I'm going to be putting a familiar twist on it. The main reason why I say he isn't an SI is because I'm not a rat bastard former crime boss and or politician. If anything Danuja is pretty much how I play most evil/charismatic runs in open world RPG games like fallout or how I play grand strategy games like Crusader Kings Two.
Like you can expect from me no Gary/Mary sue, no harems, no bashing, my three tenants of fan fiction writing.
This story draws obvious inspirations from other fics like 'A World Full of Monsters' by Fahad09 and 'Kill or be Killed' by Writer with bad Grammar T-T. But I like to keep my own spin on things, I don't know where this story is going, I have no absolute concrete plans for it. I literally just started writing this thing today.
I hope you all were entertained and I hope you leave a review for me if you find it worth your time to do so. If not then I ask to at least follow this story If you feel so inclined, thank you for reading and I hope this chapter finds you all well!