Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me.

A/N: This is an AU. Obito is a loyal Leaf shinobi and he and Kakashi are in ANBU together. Rin and Minato are still dead.

friends are there to annoy you when you least want them

and to comfort you when you say you don't need them

They were a terrifying pair and their infamy was known throughout the shinobi world. The orders for whoever had the misfortune of running into them were told to run, to never engage for doing so was paramount to suicide. Taijutsu, ninjutsu and genjutsu were batted away like annoying flies, even from the shinobi worlds most elite and their loyalty stood without question towards Konoha of the Hidden Leaf. Instructor's at the academy told tales of their battles with their enemies, how they had stood undefeated and with nary a scratch on them when they defeated twenty jounin-level mist-nin.

For the few who knew them outside of their fame had only a few choice words for them and none of them were particularly flattering. Among their small circle of friends their attributes could be listed as such: obnoxious, childish, late (always, always late) and immensely protective of one another. They were always together, in fact, Asuma couldn't remember a time when one of them was ever alone (and if they were it wasn't for long). They almost seemed to cling to each other with a fierceness that unsettled most people who didn't know what it was like to have your whole world crumble away beneath your feet.

The Third Hokage knew what they had lost, he held himself responsible for the death of their beloved sensei and so he refused to allow them to be separated, not that he would've succeeded at any rate. Those two would've defied every shinobi law and even Konoha herself if it meant saving the other. They never let their comrades die, even for the sake of a mission, but unlike the White Fang, the scorn of others meant nothing to them. They had each other after all and Naruto, the last piece of their sensei and his beloved, fiery wife.

The council feared them, but needed them and so they were allowed to do as they pleased, much to Danzo's mounting anger.

Obito yawned cursing the morning as it had come much to soon for his liking, but since they had nothing in the house that could properly be labeled as food, he found himself wandering the markets in the search of something edible. Kakashi, the lazy bastard was still asleep, having pulled the covers up over his head and mumbling something about steaks and Pakkun before dropping off again. Obito huffed, trying to be angry, but failing miserably as he cursed Kakashi and his perpetual laziness, which he blamed on him. The bastard.

"Hey, where's your porn-reading shadow?" That happily, vicious greeting could only be one Mitarashi Anko.

Obito groaned internally. "Good morning to you to," he mumbled, grabbing three eggplants for Kakashi and some fresh salmon. Now to just grab some rice and he'd be home free.

"So," Anko slithered over to him, blocking his path to his precious rice. Damn her. "All the chunin and jounin are throwing a Christmas party. You and Kakashi had better come this time," the teasing invitation sounded more like a threat coming from her.

Obito only blinked at her, his sole eye giving her a wholly unimpressed look. He and Kakashi always did their utmost to avoid said party, not because of any dislike of anybody, but because of all the damn bets. Especially to see what was under Kakashi's mask or to see how far down his scars really went. Kakashi had his reasons for hiding his face and no he was not disfigured, not by any stretch of the imagination. And his own scarring was horrific and was not something Obito was much inclined to discuss or show to anyone regardless of how many cups saké they put in front of him.

Their fellow shinobi just didn't seem to understand that, which was odd because they were shinobi. Looking underneath the underneath, right?

In regards to her question (threat), he merely shrugged. "It depends on whether we have a mission or not," he replied easily, knowing they would. They always did.

Anko only grinned at him and Obito felt a stone drop into his stomach. Damn it, she wouldn't.

"You don't," she sounded utterly pleased with herself, "I already arranged it. So you and Kakashi had better be there, got it?"

Apparently she would. Fuck everything. "Sure," he said faintly. He already knew that he wasn't getting Kakashi out of their apartment for all the Icha-Icha in the world. They were screwed.

The moment Obito stepped into their apartment he saw Kakashi sniff the air curiously and fervently prayed that he could only smell the food. He knew he was deluding himself, Kakashi's nose was better than the Inuzaka clan's sense of smell; the man could track the scent of missing-nin in the pouring rain. Obito held out no hope for himself.

"What did Anko want?" Kakashi asked in that bored, blunt way of his.

Obito sighed, setting the groceries on the counter and started preparing breakfast. "She wants us to attend the annual Christmas party and has already spoken to the Hokage to get us relieved from our usual missions."

Kakashi huffed, flopping back down onto their abused sofa, his Icha-Icha held loftily in one hand. "I'd like to see her try and make us," there was a terrifying surety in Kakashi's voice that any attempt on her part would be futile.

Obito nodded, coming over to pet Kakashi's unruly hair the way one would a dog, the famed copycat-nin rumbled happily under his ministrations. "Just don't kill her, or maim, or otherwise wound her beyond repair," he reminded the ANBU Hound blandly.

Kakashi snorted, "I have better self-control than that. Now breakfast, I'm hungry!"

Obito grinned at the childish demand, remembering a time when Kakashi had been more of an adult at six, with hard eyes and bloodied hands. It was nice seeing him playing the part of a demanding child every once in awhile. Obito's smile almost wobbled when he thought, that if sensei were still alive, the man would've happily spoiled Kakashi with every ounce of affection the man was capable of.

If Kakashi had noticed his moist eye (he most certainly did) he didn't comment, only taking the offered bowl with a smile, his visible eye curving up with his soft lips.

Feedback is, as always appreciated. There is no beta, all errors all mine.