"Well look who it is. Funny seeing you down here, Ravenclaw." Draco stated, his posse laughing behind him.
"Lovely seeing you too Draco." I said with a sarcastic tone in my voice. I was going to Snape's room in the dungeons to retrieve the book I had forgotten there earlier today. Of course the Slytherins were wandering around the bottom most point in the castle.
"I don't like your attitude _."
"Ah, so the feeling is mutual." I retorted. People often applauded my sarcasm and my demeanor that says 'I really don't care'. Draco was now sulking and following me to the potions classroom. "Can I help you with something or are you just too mesmerized by my beauty to think clearly?" I finally said.
"Actually yes. I was told to give you the latest details of your holiday plans," he said smugly.
"Oh really? And what would that be?" I said as I stopped in the middle of the corridor, waiting for an explanation.
"You'll be spending you're Christmas break at mine."
My face twisted into a confused expression. "Since when? And how do you know this?"
"Since my father sent me the letter this morning at breakfast. Your parents are taking a trip to Austria for the holiday and asked if we'd have you as our guest." My face went blank and the only thing I could think was you have got to be kidding me. Draco and I had known each other since we were babies. I was a Ravenclaw born into a family of Slytherins and I never seemed to fit in. My parents were Death Eaters and were best friends with the Malfoys, but I hadn't seen them in ages. Draco and I hadn't talked in years, until now. I never liked putting up with Draco, even as a child. We were always bickering and apparently that still held true. I couldn't even believe my parents would do this to me. Actually, I could. I am the youngest of three girls and my two older sisters were the ideal Slytherins. They both were working for the Ministry currently. Which makes me the oddball, the Ravenclaw. My parents were absolutely appalled when they first found out. They could have disowned me, but I was thankful they didn't. My mind came back to reality and I couldn't think of anything to say, so I just turned and continued walking to retrieve my book.
"Don't you have something to say?" he asked.
"I think my lack of words speak for themselves." I retorted.
He kept following me, and asked "Why are you even down here anyway?"
"Because I left my potions book in here and I sort of need it to write the essay."
"Couldn't you just borrow someone else's?"
"Well I could, but then I wouldn't have the extremely helpful notes that I took in the margins."
He nodded and just kept walking. I continued forward, trying not to think about him. I finally reached the potions lab only to find the door locked. Great. Another speed bump. I thought to myself. "Here, let me handle this." he said. I rolled my eyes as he muttered 'Alohomora' and the door opened. I snuck inside quickly, found my book, and made a quick exit. I felt no need to thank Malfoy for doing a job I was perfectly capable of doing myself. I walked swiftly past him and stomped up the stairs, eager to distance myself from this boy.
"It was nice talking to you _!" he shouted up the stairs.
"Always a pleasure." I said with a plastic smile on my face. Malfoy really knew how to drive me insane. Usually, my skin was pretty thick when it came to people who tried to set me off. But somehow he always found a way under mine. I reached Ravenclaw Tower and after solving the riddle I entered the common room and started working on my essay. My house mates must know me pretty well because none of them said a word to me. They could tell I was fuming. I'm no fun to talk to when I'm angry. Once I finished the essay I went straight to bed and tried to forget about the previous events.
The past week had gone by quickly. In fact, a little too quickly. I was hoping it would drag out so it seemed like the holiday would never come. Today I would be heading to Malfoy Manor for the worst Christmas of my life. It's bad enough that I woouldn't see any of my family over the holidays, but I have to spend two weeks with the Malfoys. Of course I'll act like the perfect guest. I do understand the meaning of manners. I'll just be miserable the whole time. No big deal. Draco and I were supposed to meet in Dumbledore's office before breakfast. I decided I would stroll in casually late just to bother him.
I went down to breakfast and sat with the Ravenclaws. Padma Patil looked at me and said, "Wait, aren't you supposed to be in Dumbledore's office right now?"
"Yeah." I said casually.
"Well, why aren't you there then?"
"I'll get there. I'm always fashionably late." I said, buttering my toast. She gave me a disapproving look to which I shrugged. Once I was fed and about to go grab my belongings, someone grabbed my robes and pulled me up from the table.
"Where have you been? We've been waiting for you!" It was Malfoy.
"Easy Tiger. Can't a girl get some breakfast before she uses the Floo network?" I slid out of his grip and he didn't resist, noticing my intentions to go with him.
"Oh, I completely forgot. All of my things are in the common room."
"Are you kidding? Father was expecting us nearly an hour ago!"
"Okay, calm down. I'll just summon them when we get to Dumbledore's office." Clearly my plan had worked. He stated his fury with me the whole walk to Dumbledore's until I finally said, "You need to chill. It's not a big deal."
"Actually it is a big deal. It was my responsibility to get you to my house and when we come late my father will be absolutely livid."
"I'll just tell him it was my fault. There was a miscommunication and I thought we were going after breakfast."
"You don't understand. He will blame it on me no matter what happens." He sounded serious, and I started to feel bad. We walked in silence until we reached the gargoyle guarding the office. I stated 'lemon drop' to access the entrance. Dumbledore was in there, up to some of his usual business and greeted us as we came in.
"Ah Mr. Malfoy. I'm glad to see you found Miss _."
"She was in the Great Hall eating breakfast," he said bitterly.
"I'm terribly sorry Professor. I misunderstood and thought we were to leave after breakfast." I said innocently.
"It's no problem at all. I find that misunderstandings in life often lead us to the best surprises." I smiled even though I did not agree at all. Draco continued to panic and finally said, "Well we really ought to be leaving."
"But of course. The fireplace is right over there," he said directing us to our means of transportation.
Malfoy grabbed a handful of the powder and before dropping it said "Malfoy Manor." Soon we were up in green flames and then we were in a dark, gloomy house. I hadn't been the Malfoys' house in a while but it seemed even more eerie than I remembered.
"Draco! _!" Narcissa said while embracing the both of us in a hug. "We were so worried! What happened?"
"It was all my fault Mrs. Malfoy. I thought we were supposed to leave after breakfast but it was really before breakfast."
"Oh well that's quite alright. The important thing is that you're here now." She said with a smile on her face.
"_, how lovely to see you again. You've grown up quite a bit since the last time I saw you." Lucius said. The last time he saw me I was 9. Now I was 16. Quite the difference.
"It's been a while. Thank you for letting me spend my holiday with you. I apologize for my parents putting this on you last minute."
"Oh it's our pleasure. I'm sure Draco will enjoy being around someone his age." I just smiled, unsure of what to say.
"Narcissa, why don't you show _ her room while I speak with Draco privately." Lucius said. I was about to grab my bags when Narcissa said, "Oh don't worry about those. We'll bring them up for you."
She led me up the grand staircase and we took a few turns until we came to a room with a silver door. She opened it up and I felt like I was in the suite of a high class hotel. There was a huge bed and a couch along with a balcony and a private bathroom. This room by far exceeded my expectations. Everything I could ever need for the holidays were in here. There was even a small, decorated Christmas tree. Maybe this vacation wouldn't be so bad.
"I hope everything is arranged to your liking. If you need to change anything please feel free. Don't be afraid to ask if you need something. We're happy to have you stay with us."
"Thanks, this is perfect. I couldn't ask for more. Thank you so much." She smiled a little and said, "Well I'll let you get settled and comfortable. Someone will be up with your bags in a moment."
She closed the door when she left and I sat on the comfy bed. If worse came to worst, I could always spend the two weeks up here. Then I thought back to Draco and his father. I really thought I had saved him with my excuse, but maybe I hadn't. Lucius didn't seem angry, per say, but I figured that he was hard on Draco. I really hoped he wasn't getting punished on my behalf. I didn't realize that being annoying and bothersome would result in his punishment. I ventured out to the balcony. It was snowing and it looked beautiful on the ground. I looked around and all I could see was snow-covered trees. It was interesting to look at and very thought provoking. I wanted to capture it on film but had nothing with the capability to do so. I heard a knock on the door and ran back inside to answer it. Expecting it to be a house elf with my bags, I was surprised to find Draco doing the delivery. I opened the door wider and he brought my bags in and set them on the floor by the couch. He was quiet and something wasn't right. As he left I grabbed his arm and said, "Hey, is everything all right?"
He looked at me with his sad eyes and said, "Not really."
"What's wrong?" I asked, genuinely concerned.
"Just like I told you he would be, my father was angry with me. Because of you."
"Draco, I am really sorry. If I would have known he would react this way I wouldn't have made us late."
"It's not your fault. He probably would have gotten mad at me for something else anyway." While I believed this statement to be true, I still felt bad. What was I supposed to do though? Malfoy headed toward the door and I said, "Do you want to help me unpack?"
He turned back toward me and gave me a small smile. "Sure."
We grabbed the luggage and laid it out on the bed. I started with the biggest suitcase that contained most of my clothes. I noticed he was still kind of down so I tried my best to cheer him up. Every now and then I'd give him a playful nudge or joke around with him just to see him smile. Even when he was smirking at me he didn't quite seem all the way there, which worried me. I always knew him as the arrogant jerk who thought he was better than everyone.
"_, why are you being so nice to me?" His ice blue eyes seemed to look into my soul as he asked this. I stopped folding my sweaters and just looked at him. "Because when you're at school you act like a jerk to try and keep your image up. And I hate that side of you. But when you're just yourself at home. You're not trying to be someone your not. You're just...you."
"How do you know what I'm like at home?"
"You see, I don't know. But I know what you're like right now. That's the guy I don't mind being around." He looked down, deep in thought. I approached him and grabbed his arm "I'm kind of starting to worry about you."
He shrugged me off and walked out of the room. I didn't know if he was upset or what but he must have a lot on his mind. Once again my brutal honesty resulted in my loneliness. Once I finished getting settled, I just took a nap. I had nothing else to do and I was up all last night dreading my trip to the Manor.
It was Christmas Eve. So far my holiday hadn't been terrible. Lucius and Narcissa were very welcoming towards me but Draco seemed distant. I assumed that he was mad at me because of our last conversation. I didn't think it would pain me as much as it did. It made me realize how much I wanted to spend time with him. But he barely looked at me. Even when his parents encouraged him to spend time with me, he would politely decline or make some excuse not to. The plan for today was to have dinner with Narcissa's sister, Bellatrix, and her husband Rodolphus. I had never met them before and I just wished someone would have warned me or prepared me. Bellatrix and Narcissa were best friends, as well as sisters, but they were so very different. Bellatrix was outspoken and opinionated, where as Narcissa was more reserved and courteous.
I was seated next to Draco for dinner, which was probably good for him since he didn't have to avoid my gaze. Bellatrix immediately thought we were dating and I had to explain that we were just friends. Narcissa and Lucius backed me up but Draco never said a word. She then proceeded to interrogate me about my family and background and such. I was a pure-blood which she approved of. She seemed to know my parents on a general level, but nothing more than that. And then the dreaded question came.
"So you're a Slytherin, yes?" she asked casually.
"Oh, actually I was sorted into Ravenclaw." She froze and just stared at me. "I'm not really sure how that happened, since my parents and my two sisters were Slytherins."
"You don't know how? Well I think it's rather obvious. It's either because you aren't skilled enough or you don't believe in blood status. So which is it?"
"I don't really know. I never thought about it." I lied.
"Do you get good marks in school?"
"I'm fairly good at most subjects."
Draco smirked and said, "Oh please. You're top of the class." I shot a sideways glance at him that wasn't the friendliest and he went back to eating.
"You believe in equality of wizards then?" Her crazed eyes were really starting to scare me. Narcissa touched her arm pleadingly and she whispered, "Bella, please. She's our guest."
But she didn't stop.
"I don't really think it's fair that pure-bloods consider themselves more talented than half-bloods or muggle borns. I think it depends on the practice and the amount of effort you put into something." I said.
"Filthy blood-traitor! I can't believe I'm sharing my Christmas Eve with someone who thinks that a mud-blood has just as much potential as a pure-blood. That's an outrage! Your parents will not be pleased to hear about this."
"Well, you won't tell them will you?" I asked, worriedly.
"Of course I will! They should know that their daughter is a disgrace to all the remaining pure-bloods!" I could feel the tears forming in my eyes. Narcissa gave me a sympathetic look but it was evident there was nothing she could do.
"Please, please. Don't do this." I nearly begged.
"I'm done talking to you. You disgust me." That put me over the limit. I muttered "May I please be excused?" Lucius nodded and I left the table and climbed the stairs, the tears coming steadily. I reached my room and threw myself on my bed. My face was in my pillow and I was sobbing. I was trying to keep it to a minimum but it all just came out. I'm not exactly a sensitive person and I tend to hide my emotions within so I think this cry was from more than just what Bellatrix had said. I think a lot of it was my parents and how I never really fit in with my family. The tears just kept coming. Crying was such an unusual thing for me. I think the last time I cried was when I was 8 and cut my knee open when I fell down the stairs.
I couldn't tell how much time had passed but soon there was a knock on the door. I lifted my head from my pillow and said, "Go away." But the knocking didn't let up. Then I heard the door open. The intruder sat on the bed and started rubbing me back. I thought it was Narcissa but then I heard a male voice say, "Don't listen to what she says. She has unrealistic expectations and a strong personality that can be difficult to deal with." I looked up and saw Draco sitting there.
"_, please don't cry. I can't stand seeing you this way." I did the only thing I could think to do. I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him. He hugged me back and it didn't feel like an empty hug either.
"Why did you come?" I asked him with tears still in my eyes.
"Because I couldn't take it. I tried to distance myself from you for years, and it worked out until this week. Then you said that you hated the guy I was at school and it made me think you hated me. So I was trying to spare you by staying away from you. But watching Bella talk to you that way was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. And then I saw the tears forming and I lost it. When you ran upstairs, I told off Bella, which is why it took me so long to get up here. _, I really care about you and I feel like I have to protect you for some reason. Which is why I'm here."
That was one of the sweetest things I have ever heard come out of Malfoy's mouth. So I acted impulsively. I was already pretty close to his face, so I leaned in a planted a soft kiss on his lips. Clearly, he wasn't expecting that because his expression was priceless. I had to smile a little at that. Then he brushed my tears away with the back of his finger. He grabbed my chin and kissed me, more passionately than the first time.
"You have no idea how long I've waited to do that." he said with the biggest smile on his face.
"You've liked me all this time?" I asked. He shyly nodded and I said, "Then why did you always start arguments with me?!"
"Because, I couldn't let you know I liked you! I had to keep it a secret. But look how it worked out." I just shook my head and hugged him again.
The water works started up again and he said, "_, don't cry! I don't like seeing you sad. But you're still pretty cute with tears on your face."
I blushed and said, "Sorry. I've just been holding these tears in for so long that I can't stop them. It's more than just dinner."
"Well what is it? Maybe I could help." I took a deep breath as more tears streamed down my face. I knew I should tell someone. Keeping it all bottled up inside didn't seem to be benefitting me. And I actually felt like I could trust Draco.
"It took me this long to realize that my family doesn't even care about me. They never send me mail and they ditch me for Austria last minute. I didn't even know I was spending the holidays here until you told me. I'm just different from them and they don't like that. Sometimes I wonder if I had been housed as a Slytherin if they would love me more. But if I was a Slytherin, I wouldn't be true to myself. Even though I'm a Ravenclaw I still don't feel like I completely fit in there. While we're supposed to be all about logic and cleverness, a lot of them are all about gossip. I feel like I don't have any true friends there since they all talk about each other anyway. I just don't have that one place where I fit in."
"Yes you do. It's right here, with me." He said, embracing me for the third time today. But the weird thing was, he was right. When I was with Malfoy, I felt comfortable and at home. More tears came now, and they were a combination of happy and sad.
"More crying? Really _?"
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I just can't help it. These aren't all sad though."
"That's better then. But you should really get some rest. I'll leave you be." He got up to leave.
"Wait! Will you stay with me?" He turned toward me and raised his left eyebrow while a sly smile spread across his face. "Oh stop with that look! You just make me feel better." I said defensively.
"Alright, if you insist." He said smugly. I shook my head at him but he still came over to me. I undid the covers on the bed and slid into them then indicated for him to do the same. He joined me and we faced each other, holding hands. I vented to him about my family and all the hatred that had been building up from all the years. He helped me maintain my sanity by making me laugh. I was so surprised at the connection we had made in a few days. It was almost a complete 180.
"Enough about me. What's your story?" I asked curiously. He hesitated before answering. Finally he said, "I think I can show you better than I can tell you." He pulled up his sleeve on his right arm and it was there I saw imprinted on his forearm the Dark Mark. Instinctively I looked away. It brought back bad memories of my parents and just the thought of the Dark Lord frightened me enough. My eyes watered again with the thought that Draco would soon be a killer and promoting evil. The thought made me sad.
"_, it's not what you think. I don't want this! But...I don't have a choice." I looked into his eyes and just knew the statement was genuine. I took his arm in my hand and studied the mark. I ran my fingers just above his skin, tracing the mark, but afraid to actually touch it.
"My father told me that if I didn't join...You-Know-Who, that he would kill us. I don't want to be a Death Eater, but it's either this or dying. I can't have my family die on my behalf." I understood where he was coming from, but it still scared me to see the mark branded on his arm.
"_, don't be scared. I won't do anything to harm you. I promise." I smiled shyly and he pushed a lock of my hair behind my ear. He wiped the falling tear off my cheek and pulled me closer to him. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed me in a soft and sweet way. Then I leaned my head on his chest and fell asleep in his arms.
It was the last day before we were to return to Hogwarts. Ever since Christmas, Draco and I had been spending a lot more time together. Casually, of course. We couldn't let his parents know since nothing was official yet. After lunch we both decided to take a walk, just to get some fresh air and do something different. We walked together out the front door and found fresh snow on the ground. I always loved snow. Once we stepped off the property, Draco linked his arm into mine. We were both bundled up pretty well since it was freezing. He led the way, since he knew the area much better than I did. After about 10 or 15 minutes, we reached a stopping point.
I looked down at the icy valley below me and it took my breath away. It was one of those simple things that you never would have noticed until you really looked at it. It just looked like the perfect little village and I felt like I could stare at it for hours. I put my head on Malfoy's shoulder as he snaked his arm around my waist.
I kissed his cheek and then said, "Why did you bring me here?" He looked down at me and said, "When I was younger, this is was my spot. I was a lonely child and I could come here to get away from my life and imagine things. I would sit under that tree during the summer and fantasize about magic and Hogwarts and even quidditch. Then one day I stopped and never came back. Until now."
I knew this statement to be true. I remember my parents nearly begging me to go play with Draco because his parents were concerned he wasn't social. And I knew that the reason he stopped going there was that his father wouldn't allow him to leave the house. I wouldn't tell him this, but it did force me to cuddle up closer to him.
Then I asked the question that I regretted, "So what about us?"
"What about it?"
"Are we together now or...?"
"Well I'd love for us to be together, but we both know that can't happen." That was not exactly the answer I was expecting.
"Wait, what?" I said releasing his arm.
"Can you imagine what people would think if they saw us hand and hand in the hallway?" He asked laughing.
"Is it really that ridiculous?"
"Come on _. You know as well as I do that I can't have a girlfriend."
"Oh and why not?"
"It would ruin my reputation."
"Here we go with the reputation again. Draco, let people think what they think. It's not their business anyway!"
"_, it's not that easy."
"Are you kidding? What do you think people say about me? The Ravenclaws mostly hate me because my parents are Death Eaters. Sure, it bothers me but I ignore what they say. They can think whatever they want but none of them know me well enough to know that I'm not like that. You have to be who you are and people have their own opinions of you."
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. It's just difficult for me to do that. You're naturally care-free and easy going but I'm not."
"We can work on that."
"And, it's not just the reputation thing." I was quiet and started getting worried. Maybe he didn't really like me that much. Was he using me just for someone to talk to other than his parents over vacation?
"What do you mean?"
He took my hands and looked me in the eyes. "_, I really care about you and I don't want anything to happen to you. That's why we can't be together."
I was confused. "I don't understand."
"I am a Death Eater now. People are going to be searching for me and my family and if any harm went your way because of me, I could never forgive myself."
"Technically, I'm already in danger. My parents are Death Eaters too."
"And if I stay with you, you'll just be a bigger target."
My eyes were watering now. Why did I have to have the perfect couple image in my head? I had been fantasizing about all of our future adventures and how much fun we'd have together and now they were being crushed. "If you care about me so much, why are you doing this to me?"
This statement clearly pained him. And I didn't mean to make him feel guilty, just to change his mind.
"Draco, I know I'm a gifted witch. I can protect myself and I know you'll help protect me. But we aren't in danger yet. Can't we just have fun together for now?" I gave him my pleading eyes that could usually convince anyone to do something. "Please?" I whispered. I guess he thought I looked adorable and he hugged me tight. I would take this as a yes.
"Will that make you happy?" he asked.
"Being with you would make me happy."
"We can work something out." I just smiled and hugged him some more. Soon we turned around and headed back to the house.
"_, I'm so lucky to have you in my life. I love you." I stopped walking but was too shocked to say anything. Inside I was melting. Sure I'd known him for a while but we never really connected until this week. It made me wonder what I was missing all these years. I kissed him passionately and said, "I love you too."