okey hi guys :) I'm new at this and hopefully my experience with this new environment will be successful. I'm also new to writing, if my page is popular, I will most likely continue. If not I might delete. feel free to leave reviews or comments, constructive criticism always helps if you want more fics! Let's give it a go. thanks!
-also I will start off at how peeta and katniss grow back together/fall back in kove after the rebellion. Personally I do not like fics with the change and plot. this is how I viewed how katniss and peeta grew back together most likely. I will apologize in advance for any typos. enjoy!
Katniss pov:
I wake up to the sound of my own scream.
I must have been thrashing around a lot while sleeping. I had a terrible nightmare. Thankfully this particular nightmare was not about Peeta choking me to death. I hate to relive that. I know Peeta doesn't hate me any more, I know it. But some part if me still thinks he will never find his way back to me.
I instantly find myself lost in thought about all those nights on the train when his strong arms were there to comfort me and ward off the nightmares. How he never was bothered by me in any way, and just wanted to make me feel safe. Mission accomplished, I felt more than safe in his arms.
I want so badly to knock on his door and ask to stay one night. Sure, he won't think more of it then just maybe a sleepover. Even though the term 'sleepover' seems a bit childish. I know he wouldn't mind, he's told me many times before that if I need anything, just come over. I decide I definately need the comfort. I try to make myself presentable, it is only 8:00 pm. Hopefully he is still awake.
It it is chilly outside, I grab an oversized sweater and slip on knee high boots. Winter came just two days ago, and it is already so cold outside. I am wearing a fairly comfortable outfit to sleep in. That is of course he actually lets me stay the night. It is the first time I would have ever asked for the privilege of this, since the rebellion. I brace myself, although I do not know what for, and step outside into the chilly atmosphere.
I am not only surprised by as to how cold it is outside, I am also surprised to see Peeta sitting outside on his porch. He looks exausted from how I can see him. I try carefully to walk across the street, wanted so badly to be embraced in his arms. I have to contain myself and not look too desperate. I wonder if he has to do the same for me whenever he sees me. Is he possible he may still be head over heals for me? After all that has happened? I don't think so.
Everythjng is going smoothly, at least I thought. I slipped on some ice that seems to have paved over the street. I'm such an idiot. How could I even think that walking across the street would be going smoothly? I should have been paying more attention.
My loud fall startles peeta and he immediately is aware of the situation and starts rushing towards me. I am only a few yards away, but it takes Peeta a little longer than it would take for someone without an injured leg to make their way over here. I think I spranged my ankle. I try to get up to walk, but it hurts. Peeta is at my side now, his left hand caressing my shoulder. I fell on my side.
"Katniss what happened? I mean I know you fell, are you okay?"
I try to tell him I am fine, but I end up wincing in pain because apparently not only my ankle hurts. I might have bruised my side, somewhere near my rib cage.
"Katniss? Katniss do you need a doctor?"
"No," I chuckle. "Peeta I just slipped on some ice, I think I'll survive. He smiles. "But my ankle hurts a tiny bit. And I think I just got a bruise. Can I try to walk on it?" He nods in agreement, removing his hand from my shoulder, offering his hand to help me up.
"I think I'll be okay. I feel fine. " A memory flushes back to me. Before the Quarter Quell, when me and Peeta were on tour. We both slipped on some ice preparing for the cameras. I then kissed him for the audience and he kissed back. I wonder if that memory was able to come back to him clearly.
Peeta thinks about this for a second but I see a little objection in his eyes. And now his smile I am just starting to see appear.
Before I can question his myserious behavior, he adjusts his right hand under my legs just below my knees, and takes my lower back with his left, and lifts me so easily off my feet.
"Katniss, you weigh nothing" he says with a grin
"You're just too strong. " I laugh. He carries me into his house with no hesitation and gently sets me down on his couch. He stands and glares at me
"Why were you outside so late a night Katniss? I mean, I know it is only 8:00, but why were you outside?" He then walks over to the door and closes it. he had left it open while carrying me inside. His house smells like warm cinoman, he probably baked something for dinner or desert. Luckily he is still intrigued with baking since the hijacking. He hasn't been painting as much, but I think he'll get the hang of it.
I don't want to bring up me wanting to sleepover, but I also do not want to lie.
"I had a nightmare. I couldn't fall back asleep, I figured I could use some fresh air. Then I saw you outside, I was curious and wanted to see if everything was okay. I slipped on ice on my way over there. I should've been more careful." I laugh. Peeta then walks back over to the couch and sits right beside me. So close, our hips touch.
"Oh yeah." He laughs. "It might even snow this winter, it's been really chilly lately."
"It has. I don't know why I thought fresh air would help me. Instead, it would freeze my toes off" He laughs. "So why were you outside in this cold weather?" I ask.
The sensation of having Peeta sitting this close to me is overwhelming. I'm afraid my expression will show on my face. I'm still really trying to figure out how I truly feel about Peeta Mellark. I knew for sure when he was taken away from me, and his mind was hijacked, that I loved him. I was so afraid Snow would kill him, I hated every second he spent in the Capitol. I still feel the same way of course. I love him. Not just loving him like a brother. I'm in love with him. The most terrifying part of it all, is that he no longer feels the same way.
He must notice the look of sadness on my face because his is suddenly filled with concern. I try and hide it, but he doesn't seem to notice. He must have replied to my question, but I did not notice. He just looks at me.
"I'm sorry Peeta I didn't catch that. What did you say?" I ask.
He looks at me for just a second to make sure that's all I was thinking. He wants to make sure nothing else was bothering me. He seems decided and continues,
"I was outside because, well I don't really have a reason actually." He admits. "I just wanted to go sit outside I suppose." He laughs, "and that's when I heard you fall." He laughs even more.
I playfully punch him in the arm, "Not funny," I try not to laugh. He laughs. I remember what he had said to me once, before the Quell: "I just want to freeze this moment, right here; right now, and live in it forever" I like laughing with Peeta. It makes me feel good. Peeta uses his hands to help him off the couch, and walk over to the kitchen, which is not so far away from where he was sitting.
"Would you like some hot chocolate? Hot tea?" I think about it for a moment. Both are equally satisfying. "Are you having anything ?" I ask.
"Yes, I am going to make myself some hot chocolate." I just look at my feet and think about it. "Katniss," he chuckles, "do you want anything? It's no trouble at all" he gives me a friendly smile. I'm so stupid, it's just a question. Why am I not answering him? I feel embarrassed. "It's not a big deal," I finally say. "No thank you."
He nods and starts to make his hot chocolate. When he is finally finished, he walks back over and sits on his spot on the couch. Once he does, he splashes hot chocolate all over his face and pants. Not all of it, but he didn't sit down very carefully either. I just laugh but he doesn't look amused at all. I come to an abrupt stop.
"My pants!" He says. He's trying to decide whether to laugh or to be serious. He finally decides to laugh, and insists on going to change. "I'll be right back, Katniss. Feel free to explore the house, but do not break anything. Okay?" He says setting down his hot chocolate. I nod.
Peeta works his way upstairs, but I stay seated. I don't think I need to explore really, Victor's homes usually have the same layout. Perhaps Peeta forgot. Or maybe he just thought I could look around. My ankle feels better and there's nothing too interesting down here, so I start to make my way upstairs. Once I'm halfway up the stairs, I hear a loud bang. I start to run upstairs, afraid something has happened to Peeta.
I open the door closest to the stairs a little too fast, and find Peeta on the floor with no pants on. He's wearing his underwear, though. His new pair of pants pants are only half on. He must have tripped over or had some trouble with his fake leg. I hope he wasn't in a rush to get back downstairs. I turn my head away, as fast as I can and apologize.
"Oh, I am so sorry! I heard a bang and I -" I stop. I heard a bang and decided to come into Peeta's room? Where he said he needed to change? I could have just knocked. My face turns bright red and I immediately run downstairs towards the door. I can hear Peeta calling out for me to wait, and that it's okay. I do not listen. He must be so embarrassed. It takes me too long to put on my shoes and jacket, Peeta is already by my side with his new pair of pants. What is wrong with me? I have seen him in his underwear before in the first games. Haymitch and Peeta were right. I am pure. He just looks at me and starts to laugh.
"Katniss it's no big deal. Besides you turned away. I'm not embarrassed and you shouldn't be. It's okay." He laughs again. "I'm glad you were worried for me. I would have done the same." He's right. He would have done the same. I just look at him and he nods, saying it's okay.
"You're not mad?" I ask confused.
He shakes his head. Okay I have made a fool of myself twice tonight. He puts both hands on my shoulders.
"Katniss, you seem pretty shaken up. Do you want to stay for one night? See how you feel in the morning?" I am so glad I didn't have to ask.
"Will it seem weird for you? I mean after all that's happened since the rebellion?"
He thinks about it for a moment and shakes his head. "It's only one night. And it's nessecary."
I decide I am most likely being childish. Afterall, it was just his underwear.
I nod and kick of my shoes, looking for approval, I hadn't had time to put on my sweatshirt yet, so I leave it there. He holds out his hand and I take it, while he leads the way.
He opens the door and gestures that this is where he sleeps. I am looking forward to not having any nightmares tonight. He sleeps in one of those man tank tops and plaid shorts. I suppose he usually sleeps without his shirt, but makes an acception for tonight. He offers more comfortable clothes for me to wear and I accept, heading to the bathroom, connected to the bedroom. I change there and when I return, Peeta is already in his position to sleep. It feels unnessecary to cuddle up to him, so I take my side of the bed. I infer Peeta objects when I am suddenly aware of his arms around me, bringing my back to his chest and sliding me closer to him. I find that uncomfortable and turn around, my face to his chest. Hopefully he doesn't mind. His arms are wrapped around my back and my waist. I feel so safe and warm.
I breathe the word "Goodnight" In his chest and he replies with, "Sweet dreams."
I fall asleep to the steady beat of his heart, like I always did.
Dreading the moment I have to wake up.
Soooo tell me what you think! I hope you enjoyed! Thanks :)