Disclaimer: If I own Glee, I'd have tickets to Glee Live in my hands right now. Yep, but I absolutely do not.
Oh, shit.
He hated that feeling. That burning, embarrassing flush spreading across his cheeks without him knowing it, (which worsened when he'd have to calm it down when the other guy moved near). The way his heart thumped senselessly fast and slow at the same time. His eyes locked, focused on that towering figure in the room, scanning his clothes—despite his better knowledge that his outfit barely differed from day to day. His words dissolved, retreated down his throat. Lips moving, yet unaware of what to say.
Why did Finn Hudson even bothered to show his face at rehearsal today? No, no, no, bad thoughts. Bad thoughts, Kurt. Subconscious can be such a lying bitch sometimes.
He wanted Finn to be here. He wanted to see that innocent—sometimes silly—face, wanted to hear Finn's warm bass filled the air. To be in the same room with him.
He couldn't resist.
It was funny. The quarterback, popular, boyfriend of the head cheerleader (clichés, why wouldn't they die out already?), and him—McKinley High's own openly gay student-slash-singer, struck with an absurd one-sided love for the other.
Stupid. He'd have plenty of crushes before in the past—failed, hopeless, the lot of them—this one hit him like a slap across the face.
It'd never work.
Never.
But just…for once?
For once? Could he experience what that emotion people are always on about, the feeling whispered in movies' romantic scenes, infiltrated into young children's minds at the end of Disney cartoons (he cursed them for his unhappiness. He would never find his Charming Prince, for fuck's sake), and chanted on and on in songs he sang and listened to all the time?
What love felt like?
Not platonic love. Not friendship. But romance.
It wasn't wrong—he told himself—to have felt this way. About someone.
It wasn't.
He just wanted to know. Wanted to feel.
Instead of calming Mercedes at times about her dates and being single, he was almost projecting his own feelings onto her, in his words. He was no less lonely than her.
He'd started looking at the quarterback in a different way, attempting to hide his blush whenever their eyes met. He beamed unconsciously—much against his will, damn it—when Finn turned his way…the excited heartbeats dying down when he noticed, the invisible cloud of his wishful thinking having faded, that the glance, the wink, was directed at Quinn.
It burned irrationally in him when he happened to catch the two engage in—ah, let's say—close physical contact. He shrugged off his jealousy (unsuccessfully) and walked on his way. Puck and Santana were practically touching each other in a way so wildly inappropriate within school grounds in front of him—and yet, all he felt was disgust. The effect Finn had on him was ridiculous.
He used to know how to behave around those—those sexually active (aka too annoyingly clingy to their partner) human beings. Finn and Quinn (ugh, their matching names) rendered whatever strategies he had useless.
He jumped a little when he heard Puck call his knight in shining armor brainless. Oh, who fucking cared? In his naivety, he saw Finn's clumsiness to be adorable, his stutter as staccatos to his perfect melodies.
And the way his name sounded in Finn's voice—oh…Cheesus, he didn't know how to describe it. The mellowness of it.
"Kurt."
Though the sound might have come out in a sort of…hesitant note. He sat up in his seat, excited, his hands clapping, ahead of his conscience.
Never mind. Just. Never mind.
He would make Finn love him. They would have to spend more time together in practicing this ballad, and, oh, he must, because he must, the quarterback wouldn't be able to refuse.
His one chance. Fate had granted him an opportunity at last.
And, being a Hummel, he knew better than to let it slip by.
Watch out, Finn Hudson, Kurt Hummel's about to step up his game.
A/N: Kind of glad Kurt got past that awkward stage with Finn, but (this was sort of based partially on my own experience nevertheless.)
Anyhow, big thank you's to all of you, for clicking on this story, stopping by, reading, and reviewing
I'd sing to you if I could! XD.
Loves,
Your ever humble fanfic writer :)