-1
Always
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter; it all belongs to Jo! Bless her!
Summary: "Those who love us never truly leave us." Harry helps Ron comes to terms with the worst possible loss…his Hermione.
Harry woke with a start from the same memory that had haunted him for weeks, replayed in slow motion time and time again. Most of them were having nightmares these days, as the final battle had occurred weeks before. It was reasonable to assume his nightmare had been about the Final Battle where Voldermort had finally been vanquished. It was ironic to Harry that he was to be the one to vanquish the Dark Lord--the Chosen One-- when in fact it had been Hermione's brilliant plan and Snape's sacrifice that in the end had mattered most.
Hermione. His best friend…his sister. He still couldn't believe she was gone, taken just days before the battle ensued. Kreacher had led them into an ambush in the Forbidden Forest. They were surrounded. The Order had barely gotten there when Harry heard Draco Malfoy's voice shout the curse that flung the huge boulder at Ron's back as he battled Dolohov. He could still hear Hermione scream Ron's name as she dove in front of him taking the full impact head on. He could hear the cold smack on the ground as she fell and Ron's frantic voice as he knelt beside her…
Harry rushed toward them, his stomach twisting into cold knots.
"Hermione, oh God Love, please don't do this." Ron was whimpering into her chestnuts curls repeatedly, his hands wiping away the blood from the corner of her mouth.
"Ron," Harry choked, "we have to move her. RON!"
Ron looked at him numbly, and nodded. They had managed to find some protection behind a thicket of trees, as the fighting raged behind them. Harry could vaguely hear Lupin's voice and others, but paid it no real mind. "Her-Hermione?"
Her eyes fluttered open and for a moment Harry dared to hope she may be alright, but then she began o cough, terrible wracking sounds, and more blood trickled from her mouth. Ron's eyes widened in fear, and he looked at Harry helplessly, before returning to her. "Why? Why did you do that, Love?" He was crying openly, clutching her bloody hand to his face.
Hermione smiled, and raised a shaky hand to tug playfully at his ginger hair. "Because, I love you, you git." Ron's sobs grew louder at her words. She shushed him and he leaned down to gently touc h his lips to hers. "I love you Hermione. Always."
She nodded. Then in a firmer voice spoke again. "Be happy…for me. Okay?" Ron said nothing. He simply laid down beside her, and cradled her in his arms as she tuned her eyes to Harry.
"I l-love you too, Harry."
"Hermione, PLEASE, hold on. " Harry begged her, unable to accept the fact that she was dying, right before them, and he was powerless to stop it.
She shook her head weakly, and smiled. "C-can't."
Her breathing was becoming more labored. Harry barely registered that the fighting had stopped, and it was quieter all around. He felt Hermione's hand pull his. He moved closer, as her words were barely a whisper. "Remember the plan. It will work. Trust me."
"I do." Harry cried. "I love you, Hermione."
"I know. Be good to … Ginny. She loves you so. Take care of him, please. Take care of yourself. I'll be watching, Harry."
"I will."
She smiled at him, before closing her eyes and turning her body completely into Ron's embrace. A minute later, she was gone.
Ron had carried her body out of the forest, seemingly immune to the cries of anguish around him as the Weasleys and the other members of the Order realized they had lost Hermione. He had been the one to go and deliver the news to her parents, and he had stood stonily by Harry's and Ginny's side the next day when she was buried in a small private ceremony. Days later he had stood by Harry side in the Final Battle and personally killed Draco Malfoy. After the victory, he'd retreated to his room, and had not spoken since.
If Harry felt lost without Hermione, it was nothing compared to what Ron felt. Hermione and Ron had been a couple for six short months when that moment arrived. She had been wearing an engagement ring for the last two. The entire future Ron had been fighting for was gone, and no one seemed to be able to convince him there was a life left to look forward to. He felt guilty and ashamed that she had died protecting him. Harry understood those feelings well as he often felt the same. But still, if Hermione had been persistent in life, it was nothing compare to now.
At night when he woke from the nightmares he could feel her presence, like a soothing hand on his shaky shoulders. He could hear her, in his head. At first he feared for his sanity, and then he realized he had always heard her, when he needed to. That was what she was to him…a voice a reason, a source of unconditional love and loyalty. That wouldn't change because she had left this earth. As he had been told by Dumbledore years ago, as his life had surely taught him by now, those who love us never really leave us. We find them in ourselves, that part of them that draws us to them, that makes us such an important aspect of our lives, becomes so engrained in us it becomes part of who we are. Hermione's voice would always be there, guiding and protecting him. He needed it. He welcomed it. But how could he get Ron to do the same?
Harry groaned, realizing there was no going back to sleep now. Throwing the covers off, he wandered out of his bedroom and down the Burrow's rickety staircase in search of something to help him sleep. When he reached the bottom stairs, he found Ron staring into the fireplace in the sitting room, absently twirling his wand in his hand. The look on his face greatly disturbed him.
He approached Ron slowly, as not to startle him.
"Ron?"
Ron did not jump, or even acknowledge his entrance. He simply kept staring into the fire, a look of utmost contemplation on his face. "I want to be with her." His voice was clear, almost disturbingly undetached. But his hands shook as he gripped his wand tighter.
Harry's eyes widened as he realized what was going on. Calm down. If you fly off the handle he'll just get more upset, and…Oh please, Hermione. What do I say?
Again, she spoke to him and Harry tentatively took the seat on the floor next to Ron. "I miss her too. It's sort of like…someone cut off my right arm, y'know." He cleared his throat, and waited for Ron to respond. After a moment Ron looked at him and the pain in his best mate's eyes liked to kill him.
"I need to be with her."
"Ron, no! She'd hate that you were even thinking of it!"
Ron looked at Harry for a long moment and then returned to the fire. "Suppose she would." He said quietly, the detachment back.
Ron cleared his throat and began to talk. "I wasn't really worried about her, y'know. I thought she was too bloody clever…thought she'd outlive all of us. Still, I tried to make her promise not to save us, or rather me, but she wouldn't listen. Just got hacked off, really."
Harry snorted. "Mmm-Hmm, just like the time I suggested she go back to school and be in charge of the research and leave the fighting to us. How long was it before she talked to me again?"
Ron chuckled. "About a month. It was nice to have her hacked off at you for a change."
Harry laughed, remembering the look she'd given him after he had said the words, and how quickly she had forgiven him when he had been badly injured retrieving the cup a month later. She had saved his life that night, with her quick thinking and brilliant spell work. If she hadn't been there, as he'd suggested, he and Ron would have died that night.
Harry sighed, and placed a hand on Ron's shoulder. "Remember the chess set?"
Ron nodded, giving Harry a perplexed look. Harry cleared his throat and went on. "You had fallen, and she told me to go on. I knew she would take care of you…get you to safety. Before I went on she told me I was a great wizard. I remember getting really embarrassed and insisting I wasn't as good as her."
"What did she say?" Ron asked eagerly.
Harry smiled as he remembered. She said, 'Me? Cleverness and books…there are more important things, like friendship and bravery….'"
Harry turned to look at Ron, willing him to understand. "She was always going to save us Ron. ALWAYS."
Ron, nodded as the tears coursed down his face. He closed his eyes and smiled. His face was more peaceful than Harry had seen it in weeks. "I feel her Harry. She's here, now. I feel her."
Harry smiled at Ron, enjoying the warn currant that was flowing through the room, despite the chilly night.
"She never left, mate. She never left."
The End
A/N It is my belief and worst fear that Hermione is going to die, saving Ron or Harry or both. I really hope I am wrong, but…Well, we will all know soon enough. I have three boxes of tissues tucked away in the closet. Please review!
