Radar sat down his tray at the crowded table in the mess tent next to BJ who stared at Radar's overflowing tray in amazement.
"He's storing food for the winter" Hawkeye smiled at Radar across from BJ.
The chatting, and plotting from Frank and Margaret was interrupted when BJ coughed and spluttered animatedly and Colonel Potter slapped him on the back "You're supposed to eat it son, not inhale it."
"Yeah Beej I know the food's bad but you have to taste it sometime" Hawkeye quipped.
BJ took a swig of god-awful coffee and replied "Not everyone likes to contemplate their food as much as you Hawk"
"Margaret about that private the one with th... agh!" BJ was cut off as his voice raised several octaves against his will.
Hawkeye stared at him incredulously, "Did you just squeak?"
"Are you alright Hunnicutt? You don't look well."
"Careful Frank you might start sounding like a doctor"
"Oh you...!"
"But he's right Beej you haven't been yourself at all this morning" Hawkeye cut off Frank "Maybe you should go straight back to the swamp and rest".
Radar watched, shocked, as BJ cast Hawkeye a hateful glare across the table, but Hawkeye just smirked.
"Go ahead Hunnicutt we'll cover you" Potter was obviously in no mood for whatever was going on with the surgeon.
BJ started to look panicked "No Colonel it's okay, really I'm fine!"
"Sir you do look kinda pale..." Radar trailed off eyes widening as he realized what was happening. He wondered why whatever sixth sense he had hadn't warned him sooner! "Hawkeye can I talk to you?"
"Can't it wait?"
"No sir it's really, really important!"
"Really?" Hawkeye sighed but stood anyway and followed Radar out of the mess.
"Alright Radar what is it?"
He was stunned as the small clerk turned on him. "That was a really rotten thing you were doing in there!"
"What do you mean?"
"You know what. You were doing the thing that guys and girls do at diners and stuff but you guys aren't guys and girls I mean your guys but..."
"Radar" Hawkeye had to stop the rant before his head broke.
"You were... ya know... doing things with your feet" Radar mumbled blushing.
"Oh" Hawkeye smiled deviously but nervously knowing he was caught.
"Well it was real rotten. Right in front of everyone! You guys could get into a lot of trouble for that! I really like you guys and I don't want you to get sent away cuz you were teasing BJ!"
"I know Radar. I won't do it again. I promise." Hawkeye grinned sheepishly at getting told off by his little friend.
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BJ stormed into the swamp quickly spotting Hawkeye lying on his bunk.
"If you here to tell me off don't bother Radar beat you to it."
BJ stilled "Radar knows?"
"He won't tell anyone"
"Hawk if you ever try anything like that again I'll kill you!"
Hawkeye laughed "Like to see you try. Besides you seemed to be enjoying it. How did that squeak go again"
He stood up and wrapped his arms around BJ's neck smiling, staring up into his eyes. BJ melted, unable to stay angry at the man who acted like a mischievous little boy.
He placed a soft kiss on Hawkeye's lips before smirking "But Hawk if I recall correctly you have made FAR more embarrassing noises."
"And I'll deny it with every fibre of my being!"
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The next day in the mess tent only Radar noticed when BJ pales at the lecherous grin Hawkeye shoots him before sliding in purposefully next to Hawkeye where he can do nothing obvious.
Hawkeyes hand brushes BJ's casually, they always sit shoulder to shoulder even when the mess tent is empty. Radar tries not to notice, he's not supposed to. Radar knows it's mainly cuz they want to be close to each other, but he also knows it's because BJ will never, ever sit across from Hawkeye again.