April 12
Brackley, Australia
Shalom Tahira,
How are you, ani a'hot? I miss you, very much. It has taken me five years to find you. I was not allowed any contact with anyone in Afghanistan because that way if the Taliban come to you then you would not know and maybe it would reduce any suffering that may have been caused by my family. Is there anyone still alive? I could not find Ari, Tariq or Aymelek. One of Aba's friends, Aydin, was deep in hiding and Aba had given him our contact information. I asked him to try and find my friends for me and to pass these letters on. You can trust Aydin. He has saved Aba's life so many times.
Hesed Randa
May 23
Brackley, Australia
Shalom Tahira,
I am glad, so very glad that you are well. Yes that is why Aydin was taking photographs of you. He has been very naughty and smuggled all sorts of Western things into Afghanistan. He hasthing for his computer that can age people! I gave him the photograph of Ari, Tariq, Aymelek, you and me that Aba had taken not long before Aba and I left. I sent him current photograph of me with measurements for my face and hair and Aydin was then able to work out my proportions and was able to from there, work out, what you look like now and have some idea of how tall you are and was then able to find you. Have they all married yet? Have you married? Here, in Australia it is illegal for girl our age to get married! The girl has to be 18! Also, our Aba's do not get asked by the boy if they can court them! There is not even courting here, it is known as "going out"! And boys and girls do not have to be virgins until marriage! It is socially acceptable to have sex and not be married or even live together!
Hesed Randa
August 15
Brackley, Australia
Shalom Tahira,
How is Aara, Daniyal, Jessabelle and Nataniel? It pains me not to be there with you while you raise your children as we were meant to raise our children together, remember? How old are they? I have met boy over here. His father was Olympic runner! He holds the world record for 400m sprint! He has torch with the Olympic emblem on it. His son, Hal – the boy I mentioned – left it in shop and Aba and I took it back to him. Also some boys stole my hijab! Hal got my hijab back for me. My music teacher and Hal's father are engaged to be married and Hal came in to my classroom under guise to talk with her and he passed me my hijab. He folded it neatly, placed it in paper bag for me!
Hesed Randa
September 13
Brackley, Australia
Shalom Tahira,
The Twin Towers have fallen and that is all the newspapers are writing about. Stay safe ani a'hot.
Hesed Randa
October 10
Brackley, Australia
Shalom Tahira,
Yes I do. I love him deeply. It hurt my heart to be away from him for more than minute! Aba says not to get too attached as our visa is only temporary protection visa. He thinks we will be deported soon because of the Twin Tower attack. Sadly, I agree with hm. Hal is saying he loves me. Aba says he is lying and Hal only wants sex from me. I do not think Aba is right. Hal still picks me up from school. He sometimes just wants to sit next to me with his arms around me and me leaning on him. He says it is 'hug' and is very enjoyable. It also makes him feel better when he is sad. He lost his Ima as well. He has bottle of her perfume on his bedside table. He shared bit with me the night we made love. Hal says making love, Aba says sex.
Hesed Randa
November 12
Brackley, Australia
Shalom Tahira,
Immigration sent Aba letter saying that we lied on our visa application form. We fled
Afghanistan to Pakistan then to Australia. They say we are Pakistani because that is where the boat is from. Hal wants to run away so we can stay together. I want to be with him but how can I leave Aba? This I do not understand.
Hesed Randa
November 20
Sydney, Australia
Dear Hal,
By the time you read this, I will be at the detainee centre. I think this is what is called 'Dear John letter'. I love you and last night was wonderful. I wish every night could be like that one was. I now understand what it is to love and be loved. I will never forget you Hal. I do not want you to come after me in Pakistan. If I must be in place of war, I do not want you here to risk getting hurt as well. Your father, I think, would die if he lost you, even though he has Gemma. You are the only link he has left to your mother. Do not take that away from him. I could not do that to my father. I love you Hal. Take care of my heart as I left it with you.
Randa
March 31
Dera Ghazi Khan, Pakistan
Dear Hal,
I'm sorry it has been two and half years since we have spoken and it was through my Dear John letter, but I feel I must inform you that we have twin children, boys, Jared and Malachi. They both have the middle name David; only here it is pronounced 'duh-veed'. They were born on September 11 2002. I find it slightly amusing that only year after America lost the Twin Towers I had twin children. Perhaps it is symbol of hope, yes? The other two pieces of paper are the birth certificates for our boys. There are also three photographs. One is of me and our boys just after birth when they are one and half hour old. The next is I and our boys at their first birthday as they blow out their candles and the last was just before this letter was sent. Father is applying for another visa and hopefully we will find you and be proper family.
Love from,
Randa