I tiredly look on the restless body next to myself. Every night these nightmares. The features of my dear distort themselves in shiny fear every night. He goes every night through the days of his kidnapping. It is three months back every night anyway they come back .
I still wait briefly then if I am touching him now and try to wake him can it be I will fall down from bed with a bleeding nose from this again. He is caught so into his dreams at the moment when he wake up this him mistakes me for his Torturer. He recognizes his fault and the eyes full hate turn eyes full of fear, then self hate and then worry and shame.
He then whispers excuses, comes quickly and looks after me. If I have insured him a thousand times, am O.k, he turns away from me. He bit himself the lips bloody, if he tries to hold back the tears. Over his back the goose-flesh arises out of fear of the rejection.
However, I don't decline him. He isn't responsible for what has happened to him. I sigh and wipes my blood of mine face. I lean across his shoulder and try to calm him, to show him I still loves him. I whisper him my love into the ear and push him more tightly to me till he finally cries. Only I know this scene. He only cries with me. He cries and trembles as long as till he is exhausted and in my arms falls asleep.
I then put him back into bed, he is still bigger than me but he has got so easy.
In this beds down I look pityingly at his body again. The once tight and muscular body has got thin, I can see every bone. The body is full of grain. Scars of burns, scars of cuts and scars of experiments, experiments. Evens Hokage-sama or Sakura couldn't what say, everything was done with him. He is blind on the right eye now, his left arm hangs feebly on him down. Is few his sheds hairs grown, no longer as brownly as Neji but a little more like Chouji again.
I give a stop from my memories, as his hand lies on my left thights. "I am sorry. I hold you of this sleep again Kiba."I give him a smile. "no worry. My nose at least remains unhurt today." He smiles back, he tries it . His mouth may smile but his eyes speak another language. I support him as well as I can do it and he wants it. He has kept his doggedness. He lstill doesn't like it, if one helps him. Therefore I help him bottom rum, so this he doesn't notice it.
Like now. I notice he wants himself sat up. Moving under his at the moment when he pulls up his upper part of the body with all his strength shove I myself. I want to look on the alarm clock which stands at his side. "hey. I almost have by slept. I havn´t notice ist already so late. " I joyfully shove me past at him and get up. I watch himself from the eye angle like him on sizt. 3-2-1-" Akamaru! Why do you always have to sleep on my clothes? Hey! Kara's foot isn't a chewing bone!" Akamaru rises and puts his head on kankuros lap. Kankuro looks down only badly to him, then he smiles and crawl his fur. This has gone for 4 weeks already so. This is every theater mornings. I know Akamaru does this with intention. This is his contribution to help Kankuro. Akamaru puts his clothes next to him and my white dog waits for the reward. "you may keep Kara's foot " Kankuro sighing deeply and watches Akamaru runs with tail wafting with the foot from the room.
I know how heavy this is for him. He can poorly lead no more marionette with his ill arm or repair it. I go in the shower to finish me. Kankuro will take a shower after the Reha. I know this he doesn't need help to put on. He makes it with iron wills and his Chakra threads. And as it had to be expected, he is already dressed and in the kitchen. I hear talking my mother and Kankuro to Hana and her daughter Kairi. Hana's husband is a Hyuga. Yes a Hyuga, the main family. I think tall cousin to Neji. The little girl fortunately doesn't have the Byakugan. No white eyes but red canine teeth on the cheeks. But we wouldn't have need to worry. Hinata has decided not to become the head of any clan but the wife of the future fair-haired Hokage. Hinabi died at a mission and it became Neji head of the Hyugas. He not allowed to used the seal anymore.
"Good morning uncle Kiiiibbbbaaaaa." Kairi jumps laughing into my arms. "You shall not call me uncle anyway."I tightly pushes her. "However, Kankuro has said you like it." Big dog eyes look at me easily sadly. ' Oh waits, my koi. Payday. I imagine and answer her grinning. "But then, this is also called uncle Kanky as well." One most loudly puffs spit and cough can be heard. He hates this nickname. Kairi jumps arm off mine, because Kankuro has spluttered just at his coffee. "Everything good again, uncle kanky?" kankuro only nods and casts an evil look at me. Tsume and Hana shake the head over us three, but it is used to her. Kankuro lives here already over a year. Except for the two months where he was simply gone, away from my life.