A random thing that crossed my mind... Ignore any spelling mistakes and stuff :P
I would be happy for reviews :)
Oh, and I, sadly, don't own anything :/
Enjoy :*
Loki: The Chitauri are coming. Nothing will change that. What have I to fear?
Logan: Wolverine. That's what I call myself. Earth mightiest hero, type thing.
Loki: Yes, I've met you.
Logan: Yeah, it took me a while to calm down, but let's make a count: I have me, my self healing, adamantium bones and some pretty cool claws, and you managed to piss off every single part of me.
Loki: That was the plan.
Logan: Not a great plan. When I come, and I will come, I'll come for you.
Loki: I have an army.
Logan: I have myself.
Loki: Oh, I thought you have wandered off...
Logan: You are missing the point. There is no throne, there is no version of this where you will come out on top. Maybe your army comes, and maybe it's too much for me, but it's all on you. Because if I can't protect the earth you can be damn sure I'll avenge it.
Loki: How have you time to fight me, if you have to fight against yourself?
…...
Loki: Nooooo! You ….. You cut my stick! I'll kill you for this!
Logan: Haha, I'd like to see this. You are unarmed and I still have three more claws.
Loki: You're wrong! I still have the Tesseract!
Logan: No.
Loki: What „No"? It's on the roof and Selvig is activating it, so that the portal opens itself.
Logan: That won't happen.
Loki: But why not? Everything is in place.
Logan: No it's not.
Loki: What have you done?
Logan: I went up a few minutes ago, stabbed the thing and sliced through it. It exploded.
Loki: But... but the explosion must have killed even you!
Logan: Well, it didn't. I feel good and the Tesseract is destroyed.
Loki: I hate you. I will kill you.
Logan: I hate it to repeat myself... but I really like to see this!
Loki: You will see!
Logan: Yes, yes, yes... I forgot to ask: Would you like a drink?
Loki: Yes, I would like that drink now.
Logan: Okay. The drinks are over there. Would you bring me a beer?
Loki: Yes.
…...
Logan: Thank you. This is the last drink in your life, so enjoy it.
Loki: I will. And it's not going to be the last one...
Logan: Oh, this tasts weird. Is this poison in here?
Loki: Yes it is, and you're going to die of it!
Logan: I don't think so. Please don't try anything while I'll kill you now.
Loki: Enough! You are beneath me! I'm a god you down creature and I'll not be bullied by...
…...
Logan: Finally... I could't hear this noise anymore...
Professsor X: Very well, Logan.
Logan: Didn't knew you're here.
Professor X: Well, I was so well hidden that even you couldn't smell me.
Logan: I got it.
Professor X: Now please, bring Loki to the prision.
Logan: What am I, your houseelf?
Professor X: Thank you, Dobby.
Logan: I just won against him and managed to shut him up. The big hairy can bring him to prision. Since when am I the responsible member of the X-Men?
Professor X: Oh, you aren't. But badly, noone else is here and I'm in a wheelchair.
Logan: I'm not going to do this.
Professor X: You're right. I'll call Nightcrawler... He's coming.
Nightcrawler: Hey guys.
Professor X: Hello Nightcrawler. Could you bring us to the school?
Nightcrawler: Sure I can. Oh, hi Logan.
Logan: Mmmh.
Nightcrawler: What's up with you?
Logan: I'd like to kill Loki, but I think I'm not allowed to, right?
Professor X: That's right. We have to wait for Thor.
Nightcrawler: Ooooh, is this tape on his mouth?
Logan: Yes, it is, and if you don't shut up and bring us to the school you'll have this on your mouth, too!
Nightcrawler: Okay, okay, let's go!
At the school:
Professor X: He won't be able to break from this.
Cyclops: Yeah, noone is able to.
Logan: haha
Cyclops: Yeah, expect you, of course...
Logan: Hey boy, even you wouldn't be able to break out of there.
Cyclops: That's the reason that we have prisions: To keep the people inside.
Logan: Well, that works for nearly everyone.
Kitty: Okay Logan, we got it, you can break out. You are the best.
Logan: Always love to hear this. Now I need some bear.
Cyclops: Are you kidding? This is a school, not a pub.
Jean: You know this.
Logan: Yes, but you can always try. I'll go and buy a few.
Cyclops: You are NOT using my motorcycle!
Professor X: Please Logan, Thor will be here any second, could you please wait for him?
Logan: Yeah, why not? It's not like I haven't beat Loki alone.
Kitty: Poor Logan... Call me the next time you need help un beating someone like him...
Logan: Kitty, you are...
Professor X: Pssst, There is someone... Ah, it's Thor.
Kitty: What did you want to say, Logan?
Logan: Forgot it.
Kitty: Haha, you and your problems in remembering things...
Jean: Kitty, this isn't funny.
Kitty: Yes, sorry, I know it isn't.
Thor: Good day. I'm here to pick up my brother.
Professor X: Yes, we've been waiting for you.
Thor: Who captured him? I want to thank this person in the name of Asgard.
Kitty: That was Logan. The bored-looking guy over there.
Thor: So, Logan's your name. I want to thank you for capturing the god of mischief. Asgard stands in your debt young man.
Logan: Young? I shall be young? If I'm young, what are you? In your twenties?
Thor: I do not think so. I'm a little bit older than 20.
Logan: Yeah, and no normal person would call me young.
Thor: I'm sorry. Ah, as I see you managed to get my brother quiet. That's not easy.
Logan: You can manage everything with some good tape and some handcuffs.
Thor: I think we can remove the tape now.
Jean: Wait... and finished.
Loki: Brother! What are you doing here? This has nothing to do with you!
Thor: Well, I think it has. You betrayed us. You managed to hide for some years, but that will never happen again. You will come to Asgard and spend your life in prision.
Loki: But I'm your brother! You can't do this to me.
Thor: You are not my brother and I can do it.
Logan: I sai it, that really was your last drink for some time.
Loki: You... you are not talking to me like this again or...
Logan: Or what? Do you want to threaten me AGAIN? That's getting boring...
Thor: Enough! I'll take him with me now.
Professor X: That would be nice. We really need the plastic-prision again for Magneto. He has been seen in New York while throwing cars at Stark. We'll have to get him in here again.
Thor: I see. If you need help just come to me.
Kitty: I... I wanted to ask...
Thor: Yeah, what?
Kitty: Could I please have an autograph?
Thor: Haha, sure you can. What's your name?
Kitty: Kitty.
…...
Thor: Here it is.
Kitty: Thank's a lot.
Thor: No problem. What I wanted to ask you... Where is the Tesseract? We need it to go back to Asgard after my nice brother destroyed the Bifröst.
Jean: Yes Logan, where is the Tesseract?
Logan: I destroyed it.
Thor: You did WHAT?
Loki: See why I hate him?
Professor X, Cyclops, Thor and Jean: SHUT UP, LOKI!
Loki: Okay, okay.
Thor: And how are we supposed to go back to Asgard now?
Logan: Don't know.
Professor X: Maybe you could ask Stark for help?
Thor: Might be an idea. Where is he.
Professor X: In New York, like I said before.
Thor: Where can I find this New York?
Logan: Man, are you kidding?
Thor: No I'm not.
Logan: My God...
Thor: That's right. I'm a god.
Logan: and not a very intelligent one I think...
Thor: WHAT?
Loki: haha
Logan: Just saying...
Thor: This man... he's...
Cyclops: I know. He's terrible.
Thor: Yes he is.
Professor X: Can we get back to the point, please?
Cyclops: Yes, sure Professor.
Professor X: Thank you. I want to propose you a deal, Thor.
Thor: Please, continue.
Professor X: We are going to New York, you capture Magneto for us and we will get Stark, okay?
Thor: I think we can come to an agreement here.
Professor X: That's good. So, let's make the Quinjet ready and fly to New York.
In the Quinjet over New York
Logan: Could you open the porthole?
Cyclops: Why?
Logan: Because you are heading for Magneto...
Cyclops: Yeah, I know, but why the porthole?
Logan: Because I still haven't got a single beer and I'm sure I can find one here.
Jean: With a rope or without?
Logan: With.
Jean: Okay... porthole is open. Goodbye Logan. We'll meet you at Stark Tower..
Logan: Yes, yes... bye.
…...
Kitty: There is Magneto!
Thor: Is he throwing cars at...
Cyclops: Yes he is. We really need to get him.
Thor: Shall I just knock him out and bring up here?
Cyclops: That would be fine. I'll bring Magneto back to the school and you three are talking to Stark, okay?
Jean: Yes.
Kitty: Yes.
Thor: Could you please open the porthole?
Jean: Yes, sure.
Thor: Thank you, bye.
…...
Kitty: Magneto hasn't seen him yet.
Jean: Yes, that's a good thing.
Kitty: His hammer? Is he kidding?
Jean: I don't think so...
Cyclops: Ough, that must have hurt.
Kitty: He... he's falling. Where's Thor?
Jean: Thor is over there. He will get him.
Kitty: No, he's too slow.
Cyclops: Yes he is.
Jean: But Stark isn't.
Kitty: That was really at the very last second. Wait... is Stark coming up to us?
Jean: It looks like. Would you please activate the transmission, my dear?
Cyclops: Sure I will.
Kitty: Stark's nearly here.
Cyclops: Yes. We can talk to him in a few seconds.
Stark: Hello, can you heare me?
Jean: As clear as we would stand next to you.
Stark: Jean! You are here. If I had know this I would have taken my most beautiful suit.
Jean: That's always nice to hear. We need to talk. Can we met at your tower?
Stark: Sure. Who's we?
Cyclops: Jean, Kitty, Thor and me. Logan will join us later. I'll need togo too. Someone must bring Magneto back to the school and his prison.
Stark: Summers. It has been a while.
Cyclops: Yes, it's been a few weeks.
Stark: Okay. We'll meet at Stark Tower in soon.
Jean: Yes Tony, see you in a few secs.
At Stark Tower
Kitty: Wow!
Stark: Oh, that's right. You haven't seen my new-made rooms. It's much more beautiful now.
Kitty: Much more!
Jean: I like the A outside.
Stark: Yes, it was Stark a few hours ago, but then Magneto started to throw things at me, also the letters. He'll pay these things for me.
Kitty: But you are a billionare!
Stark: Yes I am, but that's no reason.
Jean: Ah, Thor's coming.
Stark: Thor! My dear friend!
Thor: Tony! I need your help.
Stark: I've heared it. What's your problem?
Thor: Logan destroyed the Tesseract and without I can't get home.
Stark: You can life here. Wait... Logan did WHAT?
Thor: You are joking. I need to get Loki home. And yes, Logan destroyed the Tesseract.
Stark:That's the best thing I've heared in months! Someone finally managed to destroy this damn thing. It was alredy driving me insane.
Thor: Well, I need it to get home.
Stark: I know my dear friend. I'll find a way.
Thor: This is why I came for you.
Jean: No. This is why Professsor X told you to go here.
Stark: Ah, that's pretty interesting...
Pepper (over phone): Tony? Logan's here. Can he come up?
Stark: Course he can. Send him up.
Pepper (over phone): He's coming.
Stark: Thanks.
Jean: So, can you help Thor to get back to Asgard?
Stark: Sure I can. If I'm honest I found a way some months ago, but hadn't the opportunity to test it yet.
Jean: Then you'll have the chance now.
Logan: Hello Tony.
Stark: Logan. This is my private elevator.
Logan: I know.
Stark: That goes on Pepper.
Jean: Like everything that goes wrong.
Stark: Exactly!
Kitty: So where's the thing to bring Thor back home?
Stark: Wait a sec. Logan! I want to thank you that you destroyed the Tesseract, but how did you do this?
Logan: I sliced it. It wasn't very difficult.
Stark: You know what could have happenedß
Logan: No, but it exploded.
Stark: Oh my god, you aren't very thoughtful...
Logan: Oh please.
Stark: What?
Logan: Please can we just help Thor? I wanna smoke a cigar, and you forbid me to do this inside here.
Stark: Yes I did forbid you to do this. Oh, by the way, there is some beer over there. Just take it.
Logan: You are the best, Tony!
Stark: I know I am.
Logan: And you are egocentric...
Stark: Yes I am, shocking.
Jean: Please, can we now help Thor?
Stark: Yes sure. Come with me.
…...
Stark: See this thing?
Kitty: What is this?
Thor: Will it bring me home?
Logan: Has this stuff any use?
Jean: When is it ready?
Stark: Wow, wow. This is a transplanetic teleporter. It will bring Thor home and so it has some use and it's ready right now.
Thor: Then let's start. I've been here long enough.
Logan: And what's with Loki? We have to go back to the school and Summers has the Quinjet.
Stark: I have a few more of this Jets. We need to go to the roof.
Back at the school
Loki: This thing will bring us to Asgard? I don't think so.
Stark. It wil bring you home.
Loki: Tony Stark. The man with the hearth of steal.
Stark: No steal, it's an high-tech ARC-reactor.
Loki: What ever. It's the same useless mortal stuff like your iron suits.
Stark: Oh, I think my suits are very helpful.
Loki: And what are you without them?
Stark: More than you could ever hope to be.
Loki: I'm a god! And you're a noone.
Stark: I'm not a noone. I'm a genius, a billionare, a playboy and a philanthropist.
Loki: Haha, and what else. That's nothing.
Stark: I'm sexy and I know it.
Logan: Please, please stop or I won't stop laughing for the rest of my life and that might be a few years.
Stark: You are right. It's time for the boh to leave.
Thor: Would you please activate the teleport thing?
Stark: Just finished.
Logan: I'll take Loki out of his cell.
Jean: Please hurry a little bit. I have a class to teach.
Kitty: We have holidays.
Jean: Yes, you're right.
Logan: There is the guy with the horrible hair.
Loki: My hair is perfect as is my helmet.
Logan: This helmet is nothing than funny.
Loki: You... I will avenge everything you've done to me.
Logan: I'm looking forward to this.
Stark: Enough talking. They need to go, the machine is activated.
Thor: Thank you for everything. I hope we'll see again soon.
Stark: Me too. If we meet the next time we need to punch a few super villians together. That was funny today.
Thor: That was it.
Logan: Bye.
Thor: Thank you again for your help. Have a good time.
Jean: Have a good journey.
Kitty: Yeah, and don't let him escape again.
Thor: I won't. Goodbye you two. Say greetings to everyone else.
Jean: I will.
Kitty: And they are gone...
Jean: Yes, but we will see them again.
Logan: Yes, in the not too distant future.
Stark: Haha. By the way, where is the Professor?
Jean: Wait... Oh, he's with Magneto, who's in his plastic prision and woke up a few minutes ago.
Logan: What are they doing?
Jean: They are playing chess.
Logan: What a wonder.
Stark: And Summers?
Jean: My husband is at an emergency in the Rockys... I think it's this direction. He's together with Nightcrawler and Rogue.
Stark: Okay, I'll have to go anyway. Pepper wants to do bad things with me...
Jean: I don't wanna know details.
Logan: I would be interested in details.
Stark: I guessed this, but that's private. Here are, by the way, too many young persons in.
Logan: Ah, it's a shame I brought the children.
Kitty: Hey!
Logan: Oh please, you are a child.
Kitty: No, I' m not!
Stark: Of course you are. Okay, it's late, bye.
Kitty: I'll bring you to the Quinjet.
Stark: Thank you Kitty.
…...
Jean: What are you going to do now?
Logan: I need a cigar and some beer and then I'm going to lend Scotts' motorcycle. You?
Jean: I don't know. Maybe some training in the combat room.
Logan: That's nice. If you need some extra claws, you know where I am.
Jean: I'll be okay, thanks.
Logan: If you are sure,...
Jean: I am.
Logan: We'll see each other. Bye.
Jean: Bye.
In Magnetos' cell
Magneto: Mutants are the future.
Professor X: We can life in peace.
Magneto: No we can't!
Professor X: Oh my god, I can't believe it! We are having an argument about this for about 50 years now!
…...