Hey it's me again, sorry I haven't been on in a while, been busy. Look I know I have a bunch of stories to write but I've just recently gotten into the Blue Bloods series and this song so reminds me of Bliss. So forgive the song fic and read...review...and enjoy.
Disclaimer: I don't own Personal Demons OR the Blue Blood series I just combined them together for your entertainment.
PERSONAL DEMONS By: Rufus Rex
Psychosis must be setting in
Clouding my perception
Social Interaction
Null and void
Contact with reality
Something I no longer need
Now I have insanity
On my side
Bliss sat in her room staring out the window, waiting for the Vistor to come back. She hadn't talked, really talked, to anyone in months…a whole year. Not that it matters. Somedays it seemed like Bliss never really had a life to begin with. Houston…moving to New York….meeting Schulyer…Dylan…being a model…that all seemed to be a far away dream, something that happened to someone else. Somedays it seemed like her life compressed to only include this one year. Somdays Bliss wondered if she really was insane.
It is just as I suspect
I am wired Incorrect
Must be just a defect
Of my design
Allow me to elaborate
On my poor mental state
I seem to hallucinate
From time to time
Bliss suspected there was something wrong with her, like a loose screw or she was wired incorrectly. She felt like something that shouldn't exist, like an experiement gone wrong or a defected robot. Allow her to explain…see Bliss had the souls of all the Vistor's victims living inside her! All those voices screaming for her attention…and then there was Dylan. But was he real or just a hallucination?
I have personal demons
Lucifer was her Personal Demon.
Answers answers everywhere but not the ones I seek
Now my sanity is leaking through the cracks in the ceiling
It's just a matter of time until I lose my mind
And start crawling up the walls
Everyone seems to have answers about who she was or what she should do, Forsyth…the Vistor. But none of them are the answers Bliss is looking for, none of them are what she wants to hear. It seemed to Bliss that her sanity was leeking out of her head until all of it is dumped out. She was pratically crawling up the walls, she just wanted a way out.
Questions, questions everywhere, but not the ones I pose
Now my conscience is lying in a state of disrepose
It's just a matter of days 'till I'm no longer sane
And start crawling up the walls
There was so many questions…sometimes Bliss didn't even know what the questions were anymore. She was just so tried of fighting and her head hurt so much. But she had to fight because if she didn't she would lose what's left of herself and then the Vistor would have truly won, and Bliss didn't want that. If it weren't for the three questions she asked herself every morning she would have completely lost here sanity, then were would she be?
Unusual and bizarre
I have gone much too far
Not my fault my thoughts are
Out of the norm
I am not right in the head
Nowhere near a full deck
Maybe my parade is led
Slightly off beat
Everyone thought she was unusual and bizarre but it wasn't her fault her thoughts weren't normal, wasn't her fault that she didn't say the right things at the right times. Her mind was a little proccupied, besides it wasn't like she was really there anyway she had gone much to far to worry about stuff like an off beat parade.
You might say I'm on the fringe
Slowly becoming unhinged
Can't cure me with your syringe
It's much too late
Maybe in the scheme of things
These are just all fever dreams
They don't make a vaccine
For what ails me
Bliss was on the fringe she could feel herself coming unhinged, loosing herself to the Vistor. You couldn't just stab her with a shot and pray it worked. Her stuation wasn't that easy to fix. The Vistor wouldn't go away that easily, though she wished he would, Maggie had already proved that was a lost cause. Though sometimes this all felt like just fever dreams, symptoms of a desease you couldn't cure. They didn't make a vaccine for what ailed Bliss.
I have personal demons
Answers answers everywhere but not the ones I seek
Now my sanity is leaking through the cracks in the ceiling
It's just a matter of time until I lose my mind
And start crawling up the walls
Questions, questions everywhere, but not the ones I pose
Now my conscience is lying in a state of disrepose
It's just a matter of days 'till I'm no longer sane
And start crawling up the walls
I have strange thoughts
Rattling in my brain
Fighting to get out
It's hard to keep contained
There were so many thoughts rattling in Bliss's head all fighting for airtime. They fought and kicked and scratched trying to get her attention, it was hard to keep them contained, and through it all was Dylan.
I hear voices
Screaming inside my head
I mustn't listen
I'm sure that they want me dead
The voices screamed and howled in Bliss's mind, trying to escape their mental prison. Bliss knew what they wanted, she knew how she could help them. But she tried not to listen, tried to tune them out. Because she knew in order to set them free she had to die.
I have strange thoughts
Rattling in my brain
Fighting to get out
It's hard to keep contained
I hear voices
Screaming inside my head
I mustn't listen
I'm sure that they want me dead
I have personal demons
Answers answers everywhere but not the ones I seek
Now my sanity is leaking through the cracks in the ceiling
It's just a matter of time until I lose my mind
And start crawling up the walls
Questions, questions everywhere, but not the ones I pose
Now my conscience is lying in a state of disrepose
It's just a matter of days 'till I'm no longer sane
And start crawling up the walls
