{ I would like to take a moment to dedicate this piece here for my beloved Blackened Angel. He is more than someone I lean against when the voices in my mind begin attacking me, he extended his hand out to mine in the void. He has helped me more than any of you truly know and this story is for him, to show you all just how he saved me. You can take it for what it is, or for the truth of things.
He is my beloved Black Winged Saviour, the very reason I am still here on this earth. He kept me sane when everyone in my family used, abused and lied to me. Because of him…I continue on in this wretched world. Without him…I would have Lost It All. }
( Black Veil Brides - Lost It All, The song that fits this story, enjoy. )
{No one truly ever understood me. Could I blame them? Yes…and no. But then, they never really opened their eyes, not the way I did at least. There was a beauty in this world, a wretchedness that only a spare few would ever be privy to and to that, I was thankful that the Darkness was there. Much as everyone else preferred the Light, going to great lengths to preserve their "purity", every soul knew the truth in the end. There was a Darkness that this world held and it would soon overtake you when Death's sweet lips descended upon yours.
I'm not sure how my name came into his hands, but I would not change it. Without opening my eyes, without seeing the things I have seen…my life could have ended with a whimper and not began with a roar…}
"N-No! Stop it! Let go of me! No! I'll never forgive you for this! Do you hear me!? Do you hear me, Mom!? I hate you! I HATE YOU!" (Echoing)
Haunting words for anyone. But that rang with an appalling truth, with how much one soul could hate. No soul should even be introduced to such a sinister emotion. The Heaven's shook that day, when she was forced to the ground in another room and felt that needle pierce her neck, unable to fight against them.
In a state of catatonia, she was put on a gurney and wheeled down the overly lit hallway. There was no mistaking it, this place was a breeding ground for those sullied emotions that no one could escape from. Not here. Each was given their own set of medication to "help" control them, so the ones that ran this place could keep them in line, to help them better…"understand" what shadows lay within each patient's heart.
{I was certainly no exception.}
Wheeled into a secure area within the Mental Ward, one of the orderlies opened up the room, entering a sequence of numbers into the keypad, while the other picked her up bridal style. Not everyone in this place was a Monster, they only meant to help, but on that note, they could not always stop the ones that were there to cause harm. You couldn't be in every place at once.
Having stripped her of her boots, socks, and any jewelry she had on her, they ensured she was "safe" to be alone and made quick work of bringing her into her new… room. A place she would learn to know rather well. But how could they know? How would any of them know that the combination of drugs they had given her was working against her body…rather than with it. The thorazine had begun to slow down her pulse, weakening his already fragile heart. No one had asked her Mother about her seizures, no one mentioned that she had a small heart. But then…would it matter for much longer?
Laying her down on the bed, the orderly gave her a once over, checking her to see if she had any wounds upon her that needed to be treated before they left her alone. Sighing, he sat down on the bed, motioning for the other to pick up the clipboard. "Two deep slashes on her wrists, not enough to warrant a visit to the Doctor, they've already been…stitched up. Two bruises on her neck…" Pushing up her shirt, his eyes narrowed. "Various bruises covering her ribs and down over her stomach." Carefully he rolled her onto her stomach, pushing up her shirt, only to tense. "…. Schedule a visit to the Doctor, she has spinal bruising and a gash down her back. Looks a little infected." Pulling her shirt back down, he moved to lay her back down, sighing as he pulled her sheet up to to give her something to keep her warm.
"You think she's another…" The other orderly began to say, only to go silent when he noticed the way she was breathing. "Hey, is she alright?" He stepped closer, watching the way she breathed, noting how much she had begun to struggle. "How much thorazine did you give her?"
"Ten milligrams…it's not that much to…" His eyes grew wide as he got up. "Call the personal physician… now!" Seeing that drool was trickling out of her mouth, he rolled her onto her side, watching as the tremors began. She was having a seizure, no one had told them, no one had bothered to inform anyone that she was prone to seizures. "Damn it. She's having a bad one. Hey…come on…you have to hold on….hold on!" (Echoing)
Watching the strange object crash down from the sky, he rose up from his stone chair, dual colored optics narrowed. This was yet another show of cruelty from the realm of those that dared give a name to themselves. Humans. A blight upon creation. But what fell from the heavens did not bear the same energy signature as the mortals. This…held a brilliance that his own kind had.
At the rate, whatever it was plummeting, he knew there would be nothing left to discern from head or toe. Kicking off from the ground, a dual pair of Onyx feathered wings burst from his back, unfurling as he shot himself into the air. It was his civic duty to ensure the lives of those creatures in this realm remain uninterrupted. Ignoring that his companions had risen from their drunken stupor when he shot off, he willed his wings to carry him as quickly as they were able, pushing them past their limits.
He could see the ground opening up under where the figure was falling, whoever or whatever they were, that vortex lead to the Under Realm. It was his job to ensure no soul ever ventured there, he was the Saviour of this territory.
Outstretching his hand, Dual optics began to widen when he caught sight of what was falling…
It was a young female, skin as pristine as alabaster stone, save for the deep scars upon her arms and wrists. Time seemed to slow down as he looked upon her visage. She looked to be of normal height for a female. Small black horns pushed up from her forehead, pale lips, freckles adorned her arms and the bridge of her nose, lightly dusting across her cheeks. But what stuck out was the knife in one hand, gripped loosely in the other was a large clump of what looked to be her own hair. Now cropped short. Even more so…were the broken, slashed wings upon her back, flailing about as blood trickled out of the wounds, flying up around her.
Whomever she was…she was a sullied soul…falling into the darkness was not an option for her. He would not let her fall.
Flying after her as the darkness began to rush up to meet her, his hand shot out, grasping her own. Seeing her eyes slowly opening, he felt time speed up once more. Palid brown eyes looked up to meet his own hues. Strong arms pulled her close, cradling her to his chest, his wings brought him to a stop. Inches before the darkness, giving a wave of his free hand, dispersing the void that threatened to swallow her broken soul.
Observing the void bubble, large black tendrils rose up against the order, reaching out to grab for her…only to stop inches from her ankle as he let forth a low snarl. "Obey…" He waved his hand once more, causing the void to screech in protest, large stones began to return to their rightful place.
Seeing the void returned to it's normal state, he placed a seal over the glowing stones to ensure it remained sealed. He could not afford to protect everyone that fell to this realm, but he could make sure they would not have this sickening creation open up and swallow them whole.
"Now…" He lowered himself down onto the ground, willing his wings to return to his back, he took the time to walk back over to camp. He had no reason to rush anything, and while he did so, perhaps he could get some answers out of this…out of the ordinary female. "I know you're awake, so would you be so kind as to explain who you are? Do you remember anythin'?"
What could she say? Looking down to the blade in one hand, and the clump of hair in the other, she felt her stomach clench. There was nothing she could do, each emotion that rushed back to her heart, the pain only intensified as she bowed her head. "I…I can't remember…but it hurts to breathe.."
Onyx-Sanguine hues narrowed, if she couldn't breathe, there was only a few options he knew to take. Not many survived a trip to this realm. But due to how she had come here, he knew this was the birth of one of his kind. She was a fallen…just like him. Only with her wings the way they were, he did not know if she would even fly again. Or…did she know how to begin with?
"Do you remember your name?" He whispered, stepping over a broken headstone, keeping his energy from attacking her. That was all he could do, with how he was created, he knew he could not very well let him absorb her. Not one of his kind, or was she something else? There had to be answers written somewhere on her skin. Something to give way to what she was. "Now, ya don't have to tell me. A name holds power…wouldn't want you to think I want to control ya…but since I just saved yer ass from an eternity of darkness, I think ya owe me."
She began to tremble, hugging the knife to her chest, wheezing loudly. "I…" Knowing if she kept this up, it would only be a matter of time before she was sent into a seizure. Forcing herself to calm down a little, she let out a shaky breath. "C-Cara…that's the name my…my friend's call me."
He knew that name, and knew it well. No mortal held that name. No, she was choosing the only name that remained in her memory. Trauma, she had been through something traumatic. He was moments from entering camp, when he felt a strong tug. Dark brows furrowed when he looked down to see a spiritual teather upon her chest. "Shit…you're still…fuck."He turned on his heel, looking up to the sky. "How the hell did a livin' soul get into here?" Growling, he brought his free hand up, lightly touching it as her memories began to rush into him. "Sorry 'bout this kid."
His jaw clenched, the first memory began with a bedroom door opening in the middle of the night. Seeing a figure standing in the doorway, he easily puts two and two together. Watching as the figure strode into the room, shutting the door behind him, he heard it…words that chilled his heart.
"Be a good girl and just be quiet…"
Hearing the cries of a young girl, how the bed creaked…those grunts of pleasure. The muscles in his arms began to tense. This was the sickening, depraved memory of a human male stealing the innocence of a young girl. Gripping the teather in a vice hold, he made it fast forward. The abuse was constant, happening each night. But oh, there was more. During the daylight hours, this poor young woman was put through a nightmare no other should have. Pushed up against walls, slapped around, thrown down stairs. What kept him sane, was seeing her standing in front what looked to be her sisters, taking the hits she would not let fall upon their tender skin. She was defending those younger than her, at such a tender age, she had learned how to stand up against those who dared to threaten her kin. Even in the memory, he could see it shifting ever so slightly. She had earned her horns, her wings and the heart of the fallen.
Every punch, each abusive word, she had forced her emotions to turn to stone and fight against the abuser. She hid the pain and fought diligently against those that dared harm her family. The last memory of abuse..hurt even his soul. Seeing her, inviting her abuser into the house he had been kicked out of, how she took the sexual advance even when she felt the nausea strike her. She let it happen and for one reason. The man had dared harm her mother. After the encounter, she had waited for him to fall asleep. Moving to straddle his hips, she pressed a blade to his throat, forcing the man to wake up as a crazed look shown in her eyes. "You can hurt me….beat me…treat me like shit..but you will not hurt them…now get the hell out of here before I gut you like the pig you are." (Echoing)
Watching her memory fade to the mental ward his eyes narrowed as he watched her scream such hateful words at her mother, seeing the woman crying as the orderlies grabbed her. Pinning her down in the other room, he tensed when a needle pierced her neck. She had been institutionalized, he could see the scars glowing on her wrists as she struggled against them.
The memory faded to what it was now, she was laying in a medical bed, her soul was there for a moment, watching the men trying to resuscitate her. Whatever they had given her to calm down, it was killing her and her soul had no desire to return to that Hell.
Opening his eyes, he looked down to her, seeing her wheezing, just as she was in the mortal realm. "The birth of a Fallen…cannot begin like this. I bear the burden of returnin' you." He did not want to do so, but he had to. He could not let her begin life like this, she had to reach her end with the decision to live in this realm. Now that her soul knew of this place, it could not end with her dying of a drug overdose."Much as I want ya to stay…you have to go back." It pained him, greater than he could express. Turning his gaze to look up to the teather, he watched it beginning to flicker. "You have to fight…fight the way you did when you were protectin' your sisters…the way you were when you were getting' bullied. I know the fight has been long, I know you have been fightin' yer entire life. But you have to rise above the pain and let your wings unfurl." Looking down to her, a smile curved over his black lips. "I'll be your guide. If you let me."
Meeting his gaze, she began to tremble, shaking her head. "D-Don't make me go back there, please. I don't want to. I don't want to!" She was close to seizing, that place held nothing for her and she knew it would never turn out the way she wanted it. "I can't…I won't go back!" She drew away from him, standing shakily. "You don't know what it's done to me…you can't….can't make me!"
"No…you're right. I can't make someone go back to a Hel,l they wish to escape from. But you are not like them. You are a Fallen soul that wishes to rise above. Your soul came here, a place where it was meant to be loved. And it will be…you have our love. You always have." He took her hand in his, lightly running his thumb over the bruised skin. "You have done so much good, can you see that? You kept that monster from hurtin' them. You kept him away. You made sure that he wouldn't come back and now look at them. Look at how far your sisters have come. How far your Mother has gone."
"S-She's locking me up! How is that coming far!" She spat gripping the knife in her hand, tears began to well up in her eyes. "How is this…this good? I'm dying…because she…because…"
Taking her other hand in his, he pressed his forehead to hers, meeting her gaze. "Because she saw the scars…she saw the bruises and she heard the cries in the night. She only wants to see you get help…she does not know how to do it any other way. Most humans don't." He sighed, this was a fragile soul caught in the hands of fate, he knew he had to help her before she let the darkness overtake her heart. She was something special. All souls were. "She loves you…they all do. No matter what those voices in your head say. You are worth somethin'. Because I know you…I know who you truly are…" He drew her into a tight hug one he knew she needed, hearing a gasp catch in her throat, he cupped the back of her head. "I'm not goin' to lie and say you're an angel. No. You are a broken heart, yearnin' for someone to love you. And you are loved. You are loved beyond your years. Your dreams have given you wings to fly here…a place you have people that love you. My Fallen Angel…my sister…Arrianna."
Her eyes widened, the wings on her back began to repair themselves. Drawing back from him, she looked up to him, seeing the dual colored eyes shimmering brightly. "Y-You…know my name?" She felt her heart skip a beat, the hair began to return to it's rightful place, the knife returned to the sheath on her hip. The burden she bore, was not just her own now. It was his. Her brothers. He placed his hand above her heart, as the teather began to glow a bright blue.
"I know it's difficult, believe me. All fallen were once…somethin' else. But for you…since you're caught between a Hell you can't control and a Heaven you're graspin' for…I'll come with you."He stepped closer, cupping the side of her face, lightly running his gloved thumb over her lower lip. "You are my sister and I'm gonna keep ya safe…ya here? Now…I want you to do me a favor…wake up. Can you do that? Wake…"
"-Up. She's waking up." Came a male voice from beside her. She shuddered, her eyes opening. Blinking through the haze, she began to cough, getting the substance out of her throat. Worry washed over her features as she sat up with a state. Wide brown eyes searched the room. She was ready to cry out when she felt a gentle hand upon her shoulder. Turning to look, a gasp left her lips when she laid eyes upon a shadow in the corner of the room. Seeing it press it's finger to it's lips, did she instantly calm down.
"Whoa, calm down. Don't sit up so fast." Said the other orderly, helping her to lay back down on the bed. Relaxing, she let her eyes drift shut, she had the task laid out before her. Her eyes were now open, she had to get past this next trial so the healing could begin.
{I left that place four months later..and you know what? I'm happy. I had my eyes open to the truth, I wasn't looking at the world through bottle glasses anymore. My soul had ventured to that dark place, my heart opened up to the darkness and I let myself feel. I know I go through a lot, everyone does. We all carry our own Hell with us, but you see, if you look hard enough, you have someone there holding your hand through the battle. Crazed as my "brother" might be…I'm glad I'm not doing this alone anymore. He is my Darkness, my Blackened Angel and I wouldn't have it any other way.}