They're not mine, and I'm not making any money… I hope you enjoy!
Great Minds Think Alike?
The lieutenant behind the desk was handing me my body receipt and I was congratulating myself on successfully avoiding Joe while at the station when I heard the sound I was dreading.
"Cupcake," came from behind me, and I could tell he was too close for me to escape.
I'd sort of been avoiding him lately. Once I'd said those three little words, he'd figured we were on the fast track towards marriage, kids and the Burg dream. I'd gone into denial thinking if I was patient, he'd get over it and things would go back to normal. They hadn't.
Joe had realized there was still something in our way and after some thought; he had come to the conclusion that it was because I loved Ranger too. I don't know how he came to that conclusion, but since I couldn't deny it when he confronted me, we had gone to an off-again phase.
I decided to take that off-again phase and figure out my feelings, so I'd had been avoiding both Ranger and Joe. It hadn't been hard since Joe was angry at me and Ranger had been in the wind recovering from the Scrog incident. Now, Ranger was back and it looks like Joe wants to talk. But I still wasn't any closer to figuring out what I was going to do about loving both of them…
"Yeah, Joe?" I asked, turning around. I could see there was no escape.
"I've got a bit of a situation."
"Huh?" I asked. A situation? That sounded like he needed my help. Joe never wanted me anywhere near his cases.
"I could use your help," he admitted, and when I didn't respond, added, "quickly."
"Uh, sure. What do you need?"
"I need you to talk to someone, and maybe diffuse a situation," he said, only making me more confused and more than a little curious.
"Joe, what are you talking about?"
"Come to my office and I'll explain."
Following him to his office, I swung my eyes left and right, peering in doors, looking for any clue as to what he may need me for. This was not something I was used to.
"Okay. Go," I said, once he'd closed the door to his office.
"So, remember when you hit me with your father's Buick?" Joe asked.
"Uh, yeah," I said, wondering where he as going with this.
"Well, Carl and Big Dog were 'patrolling' past a deli around lunch time and saw a hit and run."
"Uh huh." Interesting, but still not answering why my help is needed…
"It was a girl with her dad's Jeep," Joe said, with a bit of a smirk now.
"Let me guess," I said. "She broke some guy's leg."
"His arm actually, and cracked a few ribs."
"Aren't you on homicide?" I asked. I couldn't see why he would be telling me about this other than to once again bring up the Buick incident and by context, the Tasty Pastry incident.
"Yeah, but Eddie heard from Carl and Big Dog and came to rub it in to me. Apparently it was too tempting not to bring up your revenge once again."
"And?"
"Well, you gotta admit it's a bit funny, so I went to see the girl. It's pretty obvious she's no criminal and harmless, unless behind the wheel, so they had her in an interrogation room. When I saw her, she was pacing, holding the phone, building up her nerve to make her phone call."
"Understandable. I would have hated to have to call my parents and explain if I'd been arrested for hitting you," I said. I had to admit, I was getting into the story.
"You should have been," Joe muttered, before going on. "Anyway, while I stood there, she started to dial and over the intercom, I could hear her talking. She didn't call her parents, but was talking to an 'Uncle Carlos,' and that's when I noticed a resemblance."
"Uh oh," I said, thinking I could see where this was going.
"Yeah," Joe agreed. "When she was done, I went in and asked who Uncle Carlos was and it was none other than Carlos Manoso."
"And you need my help because?" I asked, suddenly recollecting that that was how this conversation began. But I had no idea how I could be involved in this situation.
"I was on my way back to my office when Eddie, who is enjoying this way too much, told me you were here."
"Oh."
"Yeah. When I talked to her, she said her parents were going to be furious. So would Uncle Carlos, and even though he's 'cool' she'd still be in trouble. She looked really worried. I thought maybe you could go talk to her and be there when Ranger gets here. He seems to understand the crazy stuff you do so let him know this isn't the first hit and run in Trenton history."
"You want me to talk to Ranger's niece?"
"Yep."
"Will you buy me a pizza?"
"I'll even throw in beer."
"Wait! Why are you being a nice guy about this and getting me to help instead of letting Ranger just deal with it and be angry?"
"Contrary to popular belief, I am a nice guy. And, she's a good kid. Looking back, I understand why it ticked you off and that I deserved it. In fact, I'm going to go to the hospital and have a heart to heart with the 'victim' and make sure he doesn't press charges."
"Thank you," I said, going around the desk and giving him a hug. He really was a good guy, I just wish I could figure out if he was the guy for me. "Why don't you take me to Miss Manoso."
"Sanchez," Joe said absently.
"Huh?"
"Her mom's Ranger's sister. She's not Manoso. Her name's Gabriella Sanchez."
"Oh, well, let's go. I'd like to talk to her before 'Uncle Carlos' gets here," I said.
Leaving Joe's office, we headed further down the hall to an interrogation room I had visited more than once after my escapades. At least Ranger would be in familiar territory.
Giving me a quick kiss on the forehead and a 'thanks,' Joe opened the door and let me in. Sitting at the table, head in hands, was a scared looking nineteen year old girl. I was immediately transported back to what I was going through when I'd committed the same crime and my heart when out to her.
"Hey," I said softly, sitting beside her.
"Hi," she replied, looking up. When I saw her eyes, I immediately saw the resemblance. "Who are you?"
"Stephanie Plum, I'm a friend of Officer Morelli, who you met earlier. And I'm a friend of your uncle."
I saw a look of recognition flash across her face before she spoke. "Mom said she met you when Uncle Carlos was shot."
"I met Celia and Alva, but I don't know who your mom is."
"Alva," she said. And I immediately understood why she had called Ranger. Alva had struck me as a Burg-type mother. I'd face Ranger any day rather than call my mother to pick me up at the police station.
"Good choice calling Ranger," I said, smiling conspiratorially.
"He's still gonna be pissed. He sounded angry when I talked to him and said he'd leave me here to think until the end of his stakeout shift."
"What?" I asked. Ranger thought a stakeout shift was anywhere between four and infinity hours. We could be here awhile.
"He was almost done. It should only be another half hour," she said, looking like she wished it could be longer.
"Oh," I decided a change of topic was in order. "So, why'd you hit the guy?"
"He's a bastard."
"I guessed that much. Go on."
"I didn't think that would do. I slept with him, and then he left for school… in Texas. He's home on break, and I saw him and my foot slipped. Mom didn't know about any of that, and she's gonna be so mad."
"I understand," I said. "Would you believe my foot slipped at Morelli?"
"What?" she asked, looking shocked.
"Did you think you were the first person to attempt revenge with a vehicle? I used a Buick."
"You're not just trying to make me feel better," she asked, with a smile now.
"Well, yeah, but I'm also telling the truth. Morelli slept with me, and then left for the Navy. When he was home, I saw him on my way to the mall and my foot slipped. I broke his leg."
"I hope I broke Maeto's leg," she said speculatively.
"Morelli said you broke his arm and cracked some ribs."
"Did you say you and Morelli were friends? After what he did and you did?"
"Uh, yeah… we sort of have a thing," I said sheepishly. I didn't know if she knew about my 'thing' with her uncle.
"But, Mom said you and Uncle Carlos…" she trailed off, not sure how to go on. Welcome to my life.
"Yeah," I said. "I'm a bit confused. Most days I want to hit them both with a car."
Before she could respond, the door opened and 'Uncle Carlos' himself waked in.
"Babe," Ranger said, with an amused look at me, "don't let Gabriella put ideas in your head. And you, young lady, are going to be in massive trouble. I'll see what I can do, but your mother's still my big sister. What were you thinking?"
"Maeto's a bastard."
"Explain," said the master of the one word sentence.
"Do we have to talk about this?" she said looking pained. With a flash of insight, I could tell that she really didn't want to talk about the guy she slept with, with her uncle.
"Uh Ranger," I said, directing his attention to me. "Have you ever heard about me, Morelli and the Buick?"
"When you left him with nothing but his shirt and gun? Yeah, but what's that got to do with this?"
"Umm, not that me, Morelli and a Buick incident," I said, earning a curious look from Gabriella.
"Then no."
"I hit him with my dad's Buick. When I was nineteen."
"Babe, if you're trying to help Gab…" Ranger trailed off.
"No, Morelli saw me dropping off a skip and sent me in because he saw the similarity of the situation. Let's just say there are some reasons a man deserves to be hit with a car. Morelli agrees. Can we leave it at that?"
"Sure, Babe," Ranger said, giving me a look that I would be explaining myself later.
"Thank you," whispered Gabriella, giving me a relieved look.
"Let's get you out of here Gabs," he said. "Your mom was probably expecting you home awhile ago, huh?"
"Yeah," she admitted, standing and gathering her stuff. The poor girl looked like she was going to face the executioner. "Steph, it was nice meeting you. Thanks for your help."
"You're welcome," I said, and then in a whisper loud enough for Ranger to hear, "if you look sad enough Rang- uh, Carlos might buy you ice cream."
The idea of ice cream seemed to cheer her up and Ranger just gave me the half smile that said they'd be stopping for ice cream and frozen yogurt. I think I like Uncle Carlos.
"Later, Babe. And thanks." With that, he ushered his niece from the interrogation room and he was off to make the world safer for one nineteen year old.
Leaving the room myself, I ran into Eddie who was grinning like a fool.
"Who would have thought that you hitting Morelli all those years ago would be so useful?" he asked.
"Don't know," I said, leaning my head on his shoulder as he wrapped an arm around my shoulders.
"Why don't we go get some Pino's and you can tell me all about the other story with you, Morelli and a Buick. The one where all he had was a shirt and a gun."
It only took a minute's deliberation for Pino's to win out over embarrassment, but just to be sure… "You're buying?"
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A/N: Well, please tell me what you though, I love reviews! This was so much more fun than physics homework, but it looks like I can only put it off for so long…