"You did what?" Prussia looked over at Canada as he leaned over the counter, looking at the Canadian incredulously.

"He's lonely. Every year my brother invites everyone except him over for Christmas and every year he's alone hoarded up in his big old house-"

"Full of evilness!" Gilbert leaned over the counter more, anxiously trying to talk reason into him. "Come on! Give Russia a home in California, put up cameras, and you would have paranormal activity three! It would probably be fatal to just WATCH the tape!"

"You are not watching any more of my brother's horror movies… besides, he already made a paranormal activity three movie."

Austria, trying to cook around the Prussian, whacked him with a spoon, making the man yelp as he rubbed his nose.

"What the hell, Austria?"

"If you want to whine, do it on the ground."

"Come on, Asstria!" Austria twitched at the name, "you have to admit that guy shouldn't be entering the house! I don't think we have enough house heaters to warm the place back up afterwards."

"Austria agrees with me."

Austria sighed aggravated, "I agree with Prussia, although his methods are as usual as uncouth as ever."

"As long as they work."

"Prussia…" Austria shook his head before turning to Canada, "it's a terrible idea to have someone over for a holiday that he does not want to celebrate. He's a Christian, yes, but that in no manner means that he will be open for the seasonal day."

"Therefore," Prussia continued, pushing up nonexistent glasses and pretend to comb his hair, "it is only fitting that we attend a seasonal fete that will be appropriate, with people of whom we call family."

"Exactly," Austria agreed, not seeing Prussia's gestures.

Canada shook his head and opened the oven, putting the cookies in and setting the timer. "I already invited him over so he's coming."

"Poor fool, never heard of the cold war apparently."

"We're getting Kol for Christmas." Prussia sniffled, "I think I want to cry… or ship Gilbird to Spain's pad to protect him."

"Wouldn't Romano throw a fit again over Gilbird staring at him?"

"Oh yeah… Not my fault. Gilbird likes watching that kind of stuff."

"…What kind of stuff?"

"Nothing! Nothing!"

Frowning, the Austrian looked over at him. "Why do I have the feeling I should invite Hungary over?"

"You're crazy."

"Tell that to my Japanese twin!"

"Prussia, you have no twin."

"As far as you know."

"Oh maple," Canada looked between them and shook his head, "why don't we take this into another room."

"Oooh~!" Prussia winked, "Canada's gone French."

"…I'll be in the foyer, calling my boss to ensure that I get the holidays off… Don't make a mess."

"Mess? A mess?" Prussia wrapped his arms around Austria as he stalked after the man, "I do believe someone made the biggest-"

"SHUT it! No one wants to hear your perverted thoughts."

"That's not what you said last night."

"…"

~.~ Christmas Day ~.~

"Merry Christmas Russia!" Canada opened the door and the room dropped several degrees as the man of winter walked in.

"Thank you, Amerika."

"I'm Canada."

Russia smirked a bit, "oh yes, of course."

"…yeah… let's get some food and watch some Christmas specials."

Up from the top of the stairs, two sets of eyes watched the pair walk into the other room.

"Crazy. He's completely crazy."

"Yes. It would appear so."

"What do we do? Russia is going to kill him! He's going to drag him into the attic and possess Canada's soul and then Canada will kill us! His whereabouts will be unknown until we find out that he leaves and goes to kidnap Alfred's firstborn son!"

"…more horror movies."

"No, those movies just make me laugh every time."

"…"

"My information broker friend on tumblr sent me the movies."

"…I'm not even going to argue about whether or not this person exists…"'

"We must call the ghostbusters!"

Austria shook his head, "or Alfred. We'll be just in time for Alfred's dinner."

"…that works too I guess…"

Within minutes of whispered conversing, silence downstairs, and the sound of screeching tires outside, the upstairs duo both smirked a bit as they heard the front door slam open, "I HAVE COME TO PROTECT MY FIFTY FIRST STATE OF CANADA!"

"FOR THE LAST TIME ALFRED! I AM NOT ONE OF YOUR STATES!"

"BEWARE OF MY HEROIC WAYS OF THE FORCE, COMMUNIST!"