Backstep

Legal Disclaimer-Alliance Atlantis, Fireworks, Marvel and Tribune Entertainment own these rights. I'm just writing Fanfiction.

Author's Note-Yep. It's another look at Dark, Angsty Jesse. He's been experimented on, and seems to be okay with it. If you don't know what I am talking about, please, take a moment to read the following fic "In a Lifetime". It will explain a whole bunch more. My previous reviewers, I thank you for the time it took to write reviews. This is the more you asked for. I'll try to update when I can, but, after writing the 95 pages that "In A Lifetime" turned out to be, well, I think I might write my own novel. I know now that I can do it. I'll let you know how that process goes, and if I ever wind up publishing it.

Chapter 1

Sunrise. It had become the time of day that Jesse Kilmartin had begun to crave. The light covered the mountain ranges of the Appalachians with the brightest color of pink that he could think of. He had looked at the colors in the hardware store on a trip with Brennan, and wondered if they could ever find that color. As he looked at, he knew it wasn't possible at all. Emma had wanted a pink bathroom that color and he had tried, but finding it wasn't possible.

He took a moment to admire the light from the sunrise then continued with his morning ritual of the kata. The idea was to get the hands, the body and spirit all in harmony to start the day. So far, it was working. He had started doing this weeks ago, Brennan setting up a dojo at Adam's new place, one that they had all dubbed "Haven", since it seemed to be a safer haven from the one they used to know.

He turned and stretched his right arm up as far as he could. The muscles rippled in response, and he felt a cold shiver run down his chest as a morning breeze blew through. He stopped for a moment and pulled on his discarded tank top. The ritual then continued, every muscle working to pull his mind and body together. He worked at it, some days being like old ones where he trusted himself and other days being completely out of it.

Brennan had talked to him about his mindset. He knew that Jesse had been badly shaken by the death of nearly 200 children that he had been linked to by a telepathy that he didn't want. The Creator had saved his life, only to give him telepathy. The jury was still out if it was a blessing or a curse. Some days it was a curse he didn't want. Some days it was a blessing. His friends were learning how to live around him, he also had begun the process of filtering the thoughts of others out of his. Thank God he had Emma. She knew what he was going through and had been the biggest help to him. It had deepened their relationship even further. He knew she would be there for him and once he had more control, he would be there for her.

Pierce was the other thought on his mind. He loved the thought of having a child. When Lexa had told him about her choice to abort Pierce, his heart had been ripped out. She had broken something deep within him, and he knew up to the moment she had admitted it to their circle of friends, it hadn't healed. He could have thought it was healed, he had drunk himself into thinking that it had healed, but, it was slowly healing. That was good. It had made him realize how badly he needed his friends, his surrogate "family" that he had badly missed. He was alone and shielded in his thoughts.

He closed his eyes when he turned, not realizing that he was no longer alone in his solitary pursuit of mind/body unity. Adam Kane had joined him on the outer deck of the Haven. Adam had been silent. He knew that Jesse had been doing this ritual regularly, and had even encouraged it. He watched the pattern that Jesse had followed and mimicked it, knowing the pattern was more for unity than for exercise. Brennan had a stronger body one that he was going to work up to, but he could see this helped Jesse in exorcising his soul.

Adam grunted as he breathed in, his need to release the anxiety that surrounded his days a constant build up. He knew that they would eventually find all of these children, the clones of them would be in good homes and hopefully, none of this lives would be lost like the children were at the Amish farm. He could only imagine what the team of people he worked with had seen, he had feared that the Creator didn't value the children's lives and sadly, he knew now that he didn't.

He lifted his hands skyward. The muscles responded to his daily tai-chi, hoping that the mind would soon find its way back from the wandering it was doing. The mind was soon responding.

Jesse felt stronger every day he did this ritual. Emma had told him her horror stories of when she first wandered into her power, not knowing if she was sane or not, wondering if the emotions that she felt were hers or others, and her fear of large crowds. It had taken everything to get her to a Washington Wizards game, the emotions of basketball fans being something that she didn't really want to experience.

The ritual called for him to go into a lower stance, more catlike. He dropped to the kneeling position, feeling his feet turn without him even thinking it. Brennan had told him this would be a good sign, letting him know the body was working with the mind.

He opened his eyes and saw that Adam had joined him. Adam was lost in his own thoughts and was hard at his own workout. Jesse smiled then continued.

The muscles stretched then popped accordingly, ready for whatever the day had planned. He stood up straight, gave himself one last stretch in an attempt to touch his toes, then leaned back, letting his spine align.

"You done?" Adam asked quietly, "Or you need more time?"

"I'm good, just wanted to go take a shower," Jesse replied, "What's up?"

"Brennan wanted to see you down in the dojo when you were done here," Adam said, "Something about you two working out."

Jesse smiled. This would be fun. Brennan had wanted Jesse's shoulder to heal before they worked out. He felt ready and knew that this would be a great blow off of steam. He walked in and headed toward the area that Brennan had turned into a dojo. He realized as he approached he wouldn't be alone. He saw that Brennan was there in mid-routine with Shalimar. He was in awe of their symmetry in their own Tai-Chi. Shalimar had tried for years to get Jesse into a routine with her, but he was still solo workout guy. He knew that having Shalimar workout with him would be a distraction, not because of her good looks, but because she would make him laugh and lose his concentration.

With Brennan, though, he had a chance to see her through different, more adult eyes. She was a mirror to every complicated move of Brennan's while he could see Brennan having troubles with hers. Shalimar, being feral, had a dexterity that Brennan could only dream of. She turned, flipped backward effortlessly then bowed at Brennan. Brennan finished his part of the kata then bowed back at her. They stood there for a few moments, looking into each others eyes, lost in their own world. Jesse hated to shatter the scene, but he knew if he didn't, Brennan would be lost to a workout.

"So, how can I learn that?" Jesse asked quickly, "You think that Shalimar can teach me?"

Brennan and Shalimar laughed. Shalimar turned and looked at Jesse. He looked so much better since he stood in front of the burning warehouse.

"You couldn't handle me as your teacher Jesse," Shalimar replied, giving him a devilish wink, "I would kick your ass."

"Yes maam," Jesse laughed, "So, I'll let Brennan kick it instead."

Brennan gave him a total devil grin and motioned for him to join him on the floor of the dojo.

"I won't kick it," Brennan said, "I might bruise it though."

Jesse smiled and dropped his shoes at the edge of the mat. Brennan bowed, as Jesse did then stopped.

"Powers okay?" Jesse asked, "Or will you cheat?"

"Me, Cheat?" Brennan laughed, "No cheating, powers are okay."

Jesse dropped into a crouch as they circled each other. He knew that his size, compared to Brennan's was an advantage, but Brennan could easily topple him. They turned against each other, testing each other's reactions, Jesse in attack and Brennan blocking every blow, while Brennan attacked Jesse, he countered every blow. Jesse kept going over and over until Brennan held both hands up in an act of submission. Jesse had placed him in a corner he could not get out of.

"I didn't just do that, did I?" Jesse was a bit shocked. He had never bested Brennan that quickly before.

"Yeah, you did," Brennan was as shocked as Jesse was, "You seemed to know every move before I did it. I know we joked about using powers, but, Jesse, were you using yours?"

"No," Jesse stopped for a moment, "I didn't use them because I was fighting with you. I was too busy concentrating on my punches to not hurt you, as I know you were with me. This is odd."

"No, it's normal," Brennan smiled, shock fading from his face, "You do realize that your power has been growing."

"Yeah, I have, but I have worked on it," Jesse replied, "You're sounding an awful lot like Adam."

"Adam and I talked about it," Brennan began, "I also have read about telepathy when you have been sleeping. You were not just defending yourself, you were using it to defend yourself."

"And you used today to test it?" Jesse asked, slightly annoyed, "Wish you could have told me."

"If I had, you wouldn't have been able to do this," Brennan said, meeting Jesse's angry look, "Jesse, it's growing and you're controlling it. This is good news."

"It doesn't feel so good Brennan," Jesse replied, "Let's go another round. I need to work out, you mind?"

"Go for it," Brennan said, as Jesse lunged toward him, "Just don't kill me bro."

While they worked out and Jesse worked out his issues, Emma sat drinking coffee, trying to wake up. She had worked with Jesse through the night, testing the edges of his powers and helping him to build the filters he needed to get through a regular day. She was exhausted and cranky, but she knew she had to help him.

Lexa padded into the kitchen, stared at Emma for a moment, then grabbed a coffee mug and joined her. It was the lethal brew that she loved Jesse for, coffee that was strong enough to stand a spoon in. Lexa hadn't slept well herself, her evening spent working her contacts to find out any form of information on the Creator's lost children.

"Good morning?" Lexa asked quietly, noting Emma's lack of acknowledgement.

Emma looked at her, her half awake stare meeting Lexa's bright eyes.

"Not much sleep, sorry," Emma muttered, "You?"

"Too much time in front of the computer," Lexa replied, "We've got what, fifteen minutes before Pierce wakes up?"

A blond streak ran into the kitchen to hug Lexa.

"Make that Zip," Lexa smiled, "Morning honey, why don't you go see what Jesse and Brennan are up to?"

Pierce smiled and ran downstairs to the area that Brennan had turned into a dojo.

Emma glanced at Lexa.

"Thank you," Emma replied, "I don't have the energy yet to deal with a 4 year old telepath."

"Neither do I," Lexa poured them both another cup of coffee, "Let Jesse deal with him, he's more awake."

Jesse was busy, getting his butt kicked by his best friend. Ever since the realization that Jesse was using his telepathy in their fight it was as if a block had formed when he fought. He knew that he could predict every punch and blow the Brennan would pull on him, but, he found that he kept getting hit. He was over analyzing everything.

"Stop it Jesse, you are thinking too much," Brennan finally said, "I don't want to hurt you."

Jesse stopped. He let himself fall onto the mat and hit it, frustrated. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. His body asked if he wanted to phase or mass, a question he ignored. It had always been a question in his mind every time he held his breath, it was one that usually was answered by instinct.

"I know how you feel," Brennan said, settling into the mat next to him, "You want to talk about it?"

"Talk about my frustrations, yeah, but thing is, do you have hours on end?" Jesse was bitter, he thought he had been doing better in the past few weeks, "I want to put a handle on this, but every time I think I have it, it gets harder to deal with."

"Maybe you're overthinking it?" Brennan asked, "I know you're working to control it with Emma, she told me about it. She said you're making great progress. And we're all trying to think less around you..."

"Not hard for you," Jesse grinned, trying to break the seriousness of the conversation, "Oh and duck."

"Duck?" Brennan asked as a blond child grabbed him in a bear hug by the back of the neck.

"Morning Pierce," Jesse laughed, taking the blond giggling child from Brennan, "How are you this morning?"

"Wonderful," Pierce said, the child staring at him, "How about you Jesse?"

"I'm working out with Uncle Brennan," Jesse gave Brennan a glance, "You want to workout too?"

The gray eyes that met his were more questioning than the willing child he had gotten to know, something was bothering him.

"You okay, Pierce?" Jesse asked.

"No," Pierce said, "I wanted to ask you if you saw the kids last night?"

Jesse stopped. Pierce had never talked about any other kids, except the ones who were in Amish country. They had spent time explaining to him what had happened after Jesse had come out of his shock. Pierce understood that what the Creator had done was wrong. But, this was the first time that he had mentioned other kids.

"No," Jesse replied, "What happened with them, Pierce. Were they looking for you?"

"Yeah, they were," Pierce replied, "They want to come here and play. Can they Jesse? Or do I have to ask Uncle Adam?"

Jesse stopped and looked at Brennan. Their life had just changed again.