Rating: M for Mature. The following tale contains some language, drug and tobacco references, moderate violence, and yaoi references that are not appropriate for youth under 16. Reader discretion is advised.
Disclaimer: I do not own the DC Comics, Teen Titans, or any songs, books, places, names and movies I may reference throughout the tale.
Title: The Red Valley
Universe: Teen Titans, Batman: The Animated Series, Batman: Arkham City.
Themes: Time, dark comedic crime, ironic humour and violence, and non-linear narrative.
Summary: Life at Titans' Tower is a complete train wreck: Robin's behaviour is schizophrenic. Starfire's apprehensive to share her feelings with Robin after hearing rumours of his recreational activities & Raven is actually best friends with Beastboy. Meanwhile, calamity is happening in Arkham City. Can Robin deal with his issues in time to save Batman when a pair of eyes are watching him?
Dedication: This story is for my friend higashisaru, for she won the Cinco de Mayo contest that I had conducted for the Facebook group The Ducklings. I apologise in advanced if this is completely different from what you were expecting and for the delay. To make up for it, I'm righting you a whole story and not just a bloody drabble.
The Red Valley
People say not to meddle with one another's affairs; however, I could not resist the urge. Culture of Earth is quite different from my home planet. My dear friend, Robin, took me by the hand and showed me a world that I could understand—a world of joy and the merry making. I knew that the very moment that I lay eyes upon him that my life would never be the same. The Teen Titans are more than mere friends; they are my family and Robin was my big brother.
Throughout my three years with the Titans, I came to the conclusion that this is the life that I desired, a life with Robin. Those feelings of brotherly love soon turned into infatuation and then the love bug. The tale that I am about to tell you commenced half a decade ago.
June 7th 2008
"Speedy thinks that he can pull a fast one me, eh? I'll show him that I'm Robin, the Boy Wonder!"
"More like the Boy Blunder. Robin, did you really think that you could out do Speedy at his own game? Despite being called Robin, you're not that great at archery," Raven quipped.
"Oh, no, Raven," Robin waved his hand. "I'm going to plan something so maniacal, so sinister that Speedy will know who the real master is," Robin grinned, rubbing his palms together. "Now, who's with me?" Robin lowered his hands to the sound of crickets, seeing that everyone left to the exception of one Titan.
"I would be most honoured to take part in the plotting of your revengeful scheme. What is the plan of the game?"
"I… have no idea," Robin hung his head.
"Surely there is something of which you have thought. Perhaps, his spot of weakness?"
"That's it!" Robin exclaimed, punching his right palm. "Meet me on the roof at midnight and wear something provocative." Robin randomly threw a smoke bomb and disappeared, leaving a blanked faced alien.
"You sure know how to pick them, Star," Raven startlingly levitated passed Starfire.
"You are straight to the damn, Raven. I have chosen the most fit human to be my groom, and aiding him in his revenge scheme will show Robin that I can perform devious acts as well as kind ones." (Note: In the original comics for the Teen Titans in the 80's, it was the other way around. Dick Grayson perused Starfire, but she wasn't into him that much. Raven probably sabotaged the wedding for her. Oh, well. Babs & Dick forever.)
"What are you two hens talking about," Beastboy said strolling from the elevator with his best friend, Cyborg.
"Queefing."
"That—is—disgusting," Beastboy shuttered.
"Very mature. That'll get you a girlfriend," Raven deadpanned.
"Please. Do not let the talk of vaginal flatulence upset you. We were merely discussing my feelings for Robin."
"Then why not tell 'em how you feel? I mean we've all known each other for years now. You can't be actin' all shy, Star," Cyborg announced.
"But I do not wish to end our friendship either. If he does not feel the same way, surely I will com—"
"Star, listen to yourself. If a guy like Robin doesn't appreciate you for who you are, then the hell with him. Lots of brothers would appreciate your fine self. We gots to get you out of the tower, girl. Just put on your Sunday finest and you be set," Cyborg lectured.
"That is of what I am afraid; That I am too fine, that I have too much of the perk. Perhaps, I need to be more of the gloomy like Raven, the chill like Beastboy or the hood like you."
"Nah. Haters gonna hate. Just be the best you can be. You got this," Cyborg reassured.
"Thank you friends so very much for the advice. Now, I must prepare myself for my date—I mean the mission," Starfire giggled and away she flew.
"If he breaks her heart, I'll…" Raven's voice trailed, clenching her fists.
"Rae," Beastboy placed his hand on her shoulder. "And we know that in all things he works for the good of those he loves, who have been called to-"
"I need to be alone," Raven abruptly teleported to her dark corridor, leaving the two to their antics.
"You know what I feel like having?" Cyborg said off handedly on his way to the refrigerator.
"Pie."
"How'd you know?" Cyborg whispered hysterically.
"It's my job to know, bro," Beastboy grinned. And with that, the two friends devoured pie until they could eat no more.(Note: C'mon that was funny. Sometimes, you gotta add in a Teen Titans Go! reference here and there.)
12 am that night…
Starfire opened the door to the roof at precisely twelve o'clock pacific day time. She was clad in a strapless, purple party dress, a silver, cropped leather jacket with matching coloured go-go boots and a purple chocker bejewelled with an emerald in the centre. She fashioned half of her hair in a bun with chopsticks and with the other half flowing down to her waist.
"Hello, Robin," Starfire purred, cat walking towards the freshly turned eighteen year old in order to have a closer look at his appearance. Robin was sporting a black, long-sleeved dress shirt under a burgundy sweater vest and a black pair of skinny jeans with the bottoms tucked underneath a pair of combat boots. Of course, he still donned his mask.
"Starfire, you look amazing."
"Why, thank you, Robin. You are looking quite wonderful yourself."
"Thanks. So, are you ready?"
"Indeed. What are we to do?"
"We're going to the Academy of Science," Robin announced. "We will act as normal civilians unless stated otherwise by my command. Follow my lead." Well, almost normal. Robin flew down with his line-launcher and Starfire followed in pursuit. They took his bike for the ride there. Because the Boy Wonder knew the layout of the city, it would take only twenty minutes to get through downtown. Starfire enjoyed the ride immensely, for she savoured the closeness off his body. He had a scent of freshness to him, yet with a hint of musk but not too strong. He never left the tower with out some Axe. Besides inhaling his scent, she took great pleasure in grasping his petite waist, her fingers brushing against his taunt abs. Lord knows that she has already eye-balled that pert arse as well. "Something enticing about the acrobat's lithe frame," the alien thought. The princess was brought back to reality from her daze when her beloved Robin turned off the engine to his motorised bike.
"All right, Star," Robin started, lifting off his helmet and unsaddled himself from the bike. "Here's what we're going to do: we're going through the back entrance on the side of the alley and you will then fly us up onto the roof."
"Is that all?" Starfire confirmed.
"Ah, one more thing—when you approach the top, turn around and close your eyes," He added.
"Yes, Robin." Starfire did precisely what her leader told her. In anticipation, she waited for the signal to open her eyes when she placed Robin down after reaching the top.
"You can open your eyes now." She did just that as Robin spun her around.
"Robin," Starfire gasped. "It's beautiful!"
"It's nothing really," he rubbed the back of his head, laughing nervously. On the roof top, was a table set with a candle lit spaghetti dinner on a red and white chequered cloth.
"No, Robin. It is perfect. Come, let us enjoy this wondrous meal before it gets the draft."
"Right," Robin signed, leading the way. The chivalrous ward of Bruce Wayne, billionaire, pulled out the chair for his date. He sat around the other side and uncovered the clear lid of the heaping platter of spaghetti. Starfire consumed her portion and possibly Robin's as well as the pitcher's worth of raspberry iced tea. After what felt like fifteen minutes or so of feeling awkward, Robin decided to break the silence by placing his hand on top of hers.
"Starfire, aah, have I ever told you that you have the most beautiful eyes?" Robin looked ill at ease.
"Why, thank you , Robin. And no you have not," the alien smiled.
"Umm, Starfire?"
"Yes, Robin?"
"There's something that I have been meaning to tell you," he started blushing.
"Oh, Robin, you can tell me anything."
"I'm gay."
"EEEHHAAAAAA!" Starfire jolted up with a shrill that echoed throughout the tower from her night terror.
Ten minutes earlier…
Back in her place of solitude, a glum Raven is sitting on the bed Indian style, smoking a joint and listening to the song Solider Side by System of a Down on her ipod and what appears she is writing some form of poetry, possibly a gothic haiku. A knock is heard and she presumes it is Beastboy.
"Enter," she bids as she removes her ear phones.
"Hey, I just wanted to check up on you, see how you're doing," tapping his index fingers together.
"I'm sick to my stomach. I don't think I can take it anymore, Beastboy. Robin is all wrong for her! Why can't she see that?" Raven passes the joint to him as he sits down on her bed and she stands up to cross the room to prepare herself a drink. He takes a puff, managing not to cough. She grinds a slice of orange, a cherry and a cube of sugar together. Next, she pours the ingredients in a cold glass along with two ounces of bourbon. She then tops the glass off with club soda.
"I mean, he's obviously gay. How can she not see this!?"
"Well, I'm bi, so, I can totally see some gayness going on. Like, yesterday, Robin was all like, 'I'm getting my chest waxed.' and then another time, he borrowed my game-pad that vibrates and it smelled all gross when he brought it back," he took another puff.
"Oh, really?" Raven paused to take a sip of her old-fashioned and walked back to take a seat on her bed again. "That's the last time I'm letting him borrow any of my things. I had to throw away a perfectly good electric toothbrush that I now know smells like asshole!"
"He must be scared to buy a vibrator online because Batman has been watching him like a hawk ever since Robin took the batmobile out for a joy-ride in downtown and ended up crashing it," The green dude giggled, passing the joint back to Raven.(Note: videos/search?q=robin+crashes+the+batmobile&FORM=VIRE1#view=detail&mid=A60099587BEC203B44EBA60099587BEC203B44EB)
"Now, that's funny," Raven smirked.
"Want anything from the kitchen? I got the munchies."
"No. I'm fine with my ol-"
"EEEHHAAAAAA!"
"Starfire!" Beastboy and Raven shouted in unison. Raven promptly teleported herself and the beast to Starfire's living quarters.
"Starfire, what happened?" Raven asked patiently, putting her arms around her.
"Please, take me to your place of rest! I cannot stay here!" Starfire shuttered.
In several seconds, they were back in Raven's bleak and muggy room. Starfire paced the room methodically, wiping the tears from her eyes.
"What is it Star?" Beastboy prodded.
"I dreamt thaat Rrrobin iss..hee's.." Starfire stuttered, gasped in air. "Robin's gay!"
Author's note: I'm not hating on Starfire, but I love Barbara and Dick together. Just saying. Also, I am basing Robin's personality on the comics—not the show. He was the complete opposite in the show. The show was loosely based on the comics of the 80's. Dick is very outgoing and friendly and not serious and brooding how portrayed in the show. The closest to Dick's comic based personality is Red X from the show. And, no, I don't believe that Jason Todd is Red X because he's a dark character in the comics because he's Redhood—not light-hearted and flirty. Not so dark like I'm going to cut off your head to bring it to daddy. No, that's Damian. Dick was never suppose to be broody. That's what made Batman and Robin beautiful because of the contrast. Batman is moody and Dick is happy. Same with Dick taking over for Batman during his time as Nightwing while Damian is the 5th Robin. Instead of Robin being happy, he's moody and Batman is happy. So, you may like whatever Robin based off of the different Robin personalties like Stephanie Brown the first female Robin but the 4th Robin that later became the 3rd Batgirl...but I like My Dick happy. In one of the comics, there was footage of Nightwing smiling as he was beating up some thugs. Yep, good 'ol Dick!
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