N/A: I don´t own Glee.
THIS ENDS NOW
It´s been almost three weeks since Santana invited herself to move in with Hummelberry pair and surprisingly the three of them hadn´t tried to kill each other. Actually, most of the time they got along pretty well, specially, Santana and Kurt, who discovered that they had a lot of things in common, like they were sassy hot bitches and had the same rival, no one other than Sam Evans. Also, both had an obsessive love for clothes and coffee, and a passionate dislike for Brody Weston.
Santana woke up with the sounds of Rachel practicing scales while in the shower. The girl sighed frustrated and put her pillow over her head, but it was useless, as Rachel just got louder and louder. The ex-cheerleader thought of barging into the bathroom and threaten to strangle the diva with the curtain again, but she gave up as she remembered being lectured about how respecting each other privacy was the main foundation of living together in a peaceful environment, also how she couldn´t just skip her morning routine as it would mess her schedule ("that I meticulously planned when I was 3 years old and won my first sing competition"), and how the hot steam from the shower was good to her voice and breathing or something like that. Then, getting yelled at because she hadn´t heard a word Rachel said as she was more interested in checking out the small hot dripping wet body in front of her. So, no, it was too early for such stress, even if she would get an eyeful of Rachel Berry´s perky boobs.
Throwing the blankets and pillow off herself, Santana grabbed a Louisville sweatshirt and an old Cheerio short from the floor and put them on. Normally, she wouldn´t care about leaving her room in only her boyshorts and tank top, but she saw Rachel´s toy boy checking her out once when she had one of her tight dresses on and she just wouldn´t give the creep a free show. Santana then left the room and crossed the living room to the table when she saw Kurt already up and eating his cereal while reading the newspaper.
"Morning Porcelain" the tanned girl got a mug and filled it with coffee, then sat next to her friend. When she took a sip and the black nectar hit her mouth she hummed contently.
"Morning Satan. Couldn´t sleep with all those sounds the resident diva is making?" Kurt looked at Santana, passing the comics and sport section to her, while he kept the entertainment section.
"Yeah, at least it´s better than when we get waken up by her fake moans and Grody´s unattractive pig grunts in the middle of the night. You know, by how horrible in the sack Donkey Face sounds, I thought Rachel would have dumped his sorry as by now. Maybe that´s what get her lady parts tingling, assholes that have no idea how to use their dick properly."
"Oh my God, Santana. Must you be so vulgar?"
"I´m keeping it real, Twink. And…"
Before Santana could finish, the bathroom door open and Brody left wearing nothing but a cocky grin when he noticed his other roommates eating breakfast. He approached them not feeling any shame for flaunting his male parts. Kurt and Santana glared at him with a disgust expression on their face, and the former looked like he was going to cry when Brody, once again, sat naked on the chair.
"How are my two roomies in this fantastic morning?" the NYADA student asked with a smug expression as he was God just because he was showing his abs and his white ass.
"Have you ever heard about pants? They are for the purpose of covering undesirable things that other people would prefer not to look at" the Lima boy said with a annoyed tone while trying hard not to throw his cereal on the other man´s face or even his hot coffee on his naked lap.
"I´m an artist Kurt, I´m just expression myself, my freedom" Brody answered while taking a big bite from his bagel.
"Yeah, so go express it far from us. Not all of us are into abstract art. I can´t really see or understand what the hell you have between your legs" the Latina said with a flatted tone, but Brody didn´t seem fazed. Actually, he smirked even more and looked at her as he knew something.
"Santana, don´t be embarrassed. You don´t need to pretend you don´t like it just because you are Rachel´s friend. I bet she doesn´t mind that you appreciate this" he motioned to his body "So if you want to look, feel free" Brody then winked at her, and Santana felt like throwing up.
'This guy is really delusional' she thought while rolling her eyes "Oh, please. I´m a lesbian, meaning I like the 'v'. If God wanted me to look at dicks, he would have made me straight."
Brody had the decency of looking offended, but before he could say anything else, Rachel got out of the bathroom, dressed in her robe and a towel covering her hair.
"Good Morning!" the diva sang while strolling to the table "How are you this lovely morning?" Rachel kissed Brody and then got a peach from the fruit bowl.
"Disgusting by your toy boy nakedness" Santana responded.
"Brody is just expressing himself, he´s showing that as an artist he has to strip himself of his persona to be able to impersonate someone completely different from him. Also he has to be comfortable in his in skin because some roles are going to demand him to show his more than fine assets."
Her friend just gave her a shocked look, but she ignored them while taking her boyfriend's hand and pulling him into their room. Both friends kept looking at where the couple had disappeared until Kurt was finally able to shake the cloud of stupor from his head.
"We need to burn this chair immediately" the blue-eyed boy said desperately, but when he looked at the raven haired girl, she had a determined look on her face while her eyes glared at Rachel´s curtain.
"Kurt Elizabeth Hummel, this ends now!"