AN: Yadda yadda yadda, not mine etc etc etc...Get it? Got it? Good.

Shatter

caxo76

Ch.1

"Jesus Cupcake, not another one. That's your third on this month! I don't know how much more of this I can handle." Joe stated as he stared at yet another burning piece of metal which used to be my car. I was beginning to see why Joe needed Rolaids, my stomach was just rolling at the sight another close call.

I, Stephanie Plum, have no car-ma whatsoever. I blame it on that hunk of Cuban ass, aka Ranger. He has nothing but good car-ma. Secretly, I think he has my share of good car-ma, but I never get close enough to the man to have it rub off. Call it self preservation. I have a fear of self combusting whenever that man is near. MMMMMM....rubbing...

"Stephanie? Are you even listening to what I am saying?" Joe's sharp tone brought me back to reality. Damn, the dream world was so much better.

"Uh, sorry Joe. It's been a rough week, and my brain is on the fritz, you know how it goes." I shrugged my shoulders in an effort to shake off the unnerving feeling that another fight about my job was on its way.

"Unfortunately I do know how it goes, babe."

Wait.

What did he just call me?

"Um, excuse me Joe? What did you just call me?" Oh no he didn't go there. He just sashesn here all high and "I'm Supercop" mighty, forgets to ask if I am okay then knocks Ranger? In all of our years together, or not, he obviously hasn't learned anything. But that thought really didn't sober me from hitting warp 1 in rhino mode.

"You heard me. You get your car blown up from doing a skip for him, he comes to your rescue, you yell at me, you go home with him and the next day he gives you a new car as if nothing happens. What exactly do you do with him that night that gets you a new car for the next day? Huh?"

Whatthefuck? Was he insinuating that I sleep with Ranger just to get a car? Does he even know how many cars I have blown up? Holy hot flash, if only that were the case.

And this is where Stupid Stephanie remained drooling at the idea of sleeping with Ranger for cars, and Smart Stephanie (finally!) took action in the form of a stiff right hand across the face of Morelli.

"What the hell Cupcake?" He said staggering back, holding his cheek.

"You just called me a whore!"

"No I didn't! I just sai--"

"I heard what you said! I don't remember ever saying anything about you working with Terry!"

"That's different!"

"Bullshit! I at least have enough decency not to call you names!"

"You call me pigheaded all the time!"

"That's because you are, and I am not a whore! How could you even say that to me!" I was screaming in his face, and could see out of the corner of my eye that everyone was watching us have this useless argument all over again.

Joe sighed and ran his hand through his hair.

"You're right, I shouldn't have said that. And I'm sorry, but I'm just so frustrated Steph, we're not going anywhere except in circles. Don't you see what this is doing to us?"

"See what?"

"Your job. It's tearing us apart. Does that not matter to you at all?" His words stung, partially because they were true, but we were still at me being the one to have to change. Either way, it was going to screw me over no matter what I answered with.

It was time to be truthful. I took a deep breath.

"Sometimes it does Joe, sometimes when I have bad days, I do wish that I could quit, and be normal, and do all the things that others want me to do to be happy. But then I realize that I am doing it to make them happy and not me."

"I don't think you have tried hard enough."

"What are you talking about? I married the Dick to be domestic and look what happened there? I have no interest in cooking, don't know if I want kids and the idea of getting married again scares the pants off of me! I think moving in with you to suburbia showed you that I was at least willing to try!"

"That's not what I mean." Oh oh, tingle tingle at the back of my neck, and I knew exactly what Joe meant. He wanted me to give up Ranger. I didn't know if I could do that.

"We tried this before he came along and it didn't work!"

"Cupcake, you just need to try, just to change a few thin---"

There was that word again, change. I held my hand up.

"Joe, do you love me?"

He looked at me as if I had grown horns. "Of course I do, why would you ask me that?"

"Because, when you love someone, and want to be with them, you accept them and love them for who they are, despite their faults. You love them regardless of what happens to them and where they have come from. You don't love them to change them, you don't marry someone to change them, you love them because in that moment, they are everything that you want and need them to be. " Sometime during my rant I realized that I was not longer talking about Joe and I, but instead I was talking about Ranger.

I felt the tingle again, and looked up to see him slowly making his way over, as if to give us the time and space to finish whatever had been started.

I held his eyes and continued on.

"You may not like everything about them, but they come to you as a whole package. Not bits and pieces to pick apart. I have been picked apart my whole life, and I need someone there to keep me together."

Joe cleared his throat as he followed my gaze. Realizing I had been caught, I blushed and looked at the ground.

"Cupcake...I..." he sighed " You know I love you, I just never realized that it wasn't the love that you needed. I...I...I'm not here to crush you, I would never mean to do that intentionally. I guess, I never knew you felt that way about him."

"Huh?"

"Come on, Steph, we both know you weren't referring to me."

"But – I just, I -"

His eyes softened.

"I guess this is the end of an era, huh Cupcake?"

I nodded as tears slowly began to fill my eyes.

Another throat cleared, and I felt a warm hand on my back.

"Babe?"

Ah, the infamous word that has two million meanings.

"Well, I guess you couldn't been in better hands Cupcake...I'll see you around."

The comforting hand began to make a circular motion, slowly calming me down.

"You okay?" he asked drawing me to his chest.

His smell alone almost left me bawling again. It hurt to be around him, it hurt to be held by him, and to smell him, and to love him.

My heart was bursting and it had nowhere to go.

"I just want to go home."