These Things Unsaid
The room was silent. Eerie. Morbid.
There were bandages around her face and down her neck down towards her chest. The heart monitor and quiet wheezing of air through of a breathalyzer tube were the only noise in the area.
His hands were clasped over one of hers as he prayed fruitlessly for her eyes to open.
It's just a matter of time a few days ago…
He wished it was last weekend. Any other time before now. Even that fight they'd had because of her father yesterday would be better than her lying lifeless in this hospital bed.
He wished this hadn't happened. That she hadn't run out and drove off after he yelled at her, saying that maybe her dad was right. That maybe he was a delinquent and an idiot and maybe they should just never speak to each other again.
God he hoped that wasn't the last thing he got to ever say to her.
Well I've been here all night and I'm watching you….
He hadn't slept in over twenty-seven hours, since getting the dreadful call from Neji informing him of the accident. Of her being found miles out of town and a part of a six car pile-up.
He had been here for hours, first in the waiting room while she was in surgery, and then in here. He'd been holding her hand since he got in here.
I hope that you can feel me….
The doctor told him it was okay to go home but he refused and they didn't try to make him.
He wouldn't leave until he got to say he was sorry. That he'd never told her he loved her, that he let her dad's cruelty get to him, that he constantly doubted if they really should be together, that he hadn't bothered to tell her how much he adored her….
How he never showed her just how much she made his life worth living.
You took the time, to speak into my mind and my heart words of life….
He felt tears stinging his eyes again and rubbed his cheek against her hand, trying to keep the tears from falling.
He wanted so badly to tell her just how much she meant to him. Everything he'd realized since she went into her coma. Everything he'd been too scared to admit to for fear of being hurt when it was only hurting her by not saying how he really felt out loud.
"Hinata…." He said shakily, closing his eyes to block out the tears, "I love you so much…."
I wanna tell you that I'm sorry…
That I never told you….
When we were face to face….
He sat there in his grief, wishing to hold her in his arms but knowing he couldn't move her for fear of opening her wounds or worse.
He wished she would wake up an smile at him, melt his heart like she'd done so many times before with just that loving look of acceptance that she reserved just for him.
You taught me not to take for granted….
The time that we have to show that we care….
If she would just wake up and smile at him, he would never waste the time they had together with doubts again.
If you fly away tonight….
He squeezed her hand gently, to remind himself she was still there as he cried.
He looked up at her face for any reaction to the movement. There was none.
Wanna tell you that I love you….
Wanna tell you that I'm sorry….
That I never told you…
"I love you…"
He couldn't say it before but now he couldn't say it enough.
He hoped that it would jolt her awake in her shock that he was saying it.
But no matter how many times he's said it tonight, her eyes remained closed and his eyes remained filled with tears.
He wished he had said it sooner.