Author's Note: These aren't my characters, nor is the world they are in mine. However, I'd like to take some credit for this story. Beta'd and coauthored by my best friend and co-conspirator, the-yaoi-squirrel. Look to her profile for Naruto's point of view. In fact, you should go read her side first, as the story alternates between our two favorite boys.

It was very rare for Gaara to hate his duties as Kazekage. Occasionally dislike them, yes. Find them tedious, more often than not. Yet, for his village, it was well worth the monotony and difficult decisions. There were only very few moments when he actually wanted to just stand up and walk out. Or maybe just kill whoever was causing him trouble.

This was one of those moments.

Two days worth of meetings with his fellow Kages and this day's meeting had started at 8:30 in the morning. It was now 2:30 in the afternoon and the Raikage, Mizukage, and Tsuchikage were currently at each others' throats. Gaara wasn't even sure what they were arguing about at this point. He'd stopped paying attention to the argument when it had digressed into personal attacks rather than political negotiations.

Thankfully he'd already agreed with Kankuro that if the meeting didn't break for lunch by 3 o'clock, Kankuro was to rush into the room and rescue Gaara from this fiasco masquerading as a political summit, claiming village business or some other emergency. It was good to have your siblings as your closest advisors.

After deciding that pinning them to their chairs with sand and attempting to force cooperation would be counter-productive and would use far more energy than Gaara thought worthwhile, he'd slipped into his familiar state of conscious meditation in order to appear slightly less bored. He was still aware enough to step in if the Mizukage decided to act on her obvious inclination towards injuring the Tsuchikage and if Naruto went through with the prank that he seemed to be planning in his apparent boredom.

He was also aware enough to recognize the disappointed look on Naruto's face when his sand snatched a projectile from the air, flying directly at his face, at 1:40 pm. Sending a glare in the direction of a now guilty looking Naruto, he unfolded a piece of paper and began to scan the words that were nestled amidst doodles of – was that Gamabunta in a tutu?! And mutant ANBU eating the Mizukage and Raikage?! Taking care to not allow his facial expression to change, he moved his focus to the messy scrawl.

Hey Gaara! Where're you at?

Well, mentally that is. I can see you sitting over there. I'm STILL stuck in the final meeting. You know, the one that was supposed to be over with THREE hours ago? I'm bored and starving. I would be soooo embarrassed by my stomach right now if the Cloud-nin and Lightning-nin weren't too busy arguing. Want to meet at the Ichiraku Ramen Shop in a coupla hours? You haven't really experienced Konoha 'til you've had Ichiraku ramen. Come on, it'll be my treat! You don't get out nearly enough. If this isn't out by the end of the hour, promise me you'll feign some diplomatic emergency that needs my urgent attention to bust me out of this, k? I'm out of paper to doodle on, and they're yelling too loudly to escape into some mental fantasy as you seem to have done, you lucky bastard. I don't think I can take much more.

Naruto

Damn. Naruto obviously knew him too well if he could tell that Gaara hadn't actually been paying attention. He knew him far too well if he'd guessed that Gaara would already have an escape plan. Perhaps Gaara could include his unfortunate friend in his departure… Or not. It was Naruto's fault for seating the Mizukage, Tsuchikage, and Raikage so closely together. That would never end well. In any universe.

Glancing at the clock and seeing that he had 20 minutes to formulate a response and decide on the besieged Hokage's fate, he pulled his Konoha-provided paper towards himself and put pen to paper.

After signing his name, and adding a post script merely for the sake of disturbing his friend's calm, he used his sand to pass the notes back to Naruto underneath the long table.

Hokage-sama,

I cannot express how comforting it is to know that the man who invited us all here for these informative and productive meetings is paying so close attention to the proceedings. You are truly an inspiration to us all. Idiot.

If you're not going to pay attention to the argument, you could spend the time deciding how to convince the council that this room requires new chairs. Perhaps comfort could prevent some of the unfortunate outbursts that have occurred yesterday and today.

As entertaining as it is to see your demeaning drawings of your summons and subordinates, I do not appreciate your attempt at publicly humiliating me by throwing a wad of paper at my face. I'm also offended that you seemed to think that I wouldn't catch it. You, of all people, should be aware of the speed of my sand. Also, if you know me well enough to notice my lack of attention, you should also be aware that payback is a bitch. I'm looking forward to it.

As for my impending escape, I've yet to decide between including you in my plan or allowing you to sit here and suffer in your boredom. Regardless of the outcome, I will take you up on your invitation to Ichiraku Ramen. It sounds like quite the experience.

Sabaku no Gaara

Fifth Kazekage of Suna

P.S. I hope Ichiraku serves salted tongue and gizzard. Yum.