I'm getting a lot of inspiration from fan art lately.
This story was written in exchange for a Taishirou one-shot by SageoWind218. Go read "Paper Cranes!"
Warnings: Shonen-ai.
Disclaimer: Don't own Digimon, people! Sucks, yeah, but such is life.
Of Ferris Wheels and Soccer Games
Taichi's toes curled and flexed as they itched to touch the soles of soccer cleats. He shifted his weight back and forth on each foot as he filled up his water bottle, watching the liquid rise until it overflowed over the plastic rim. He screwed on the cap as he glanced towards the clock for the fifth time in two minutes.
He sighed. Still an hour to go.
"If you fill up your water bottle now, it'll be warm by the time the game starts."
Taichi flicked his gaze over to his younger sister, who was still in her pajamas, standing by the bedroom door. He gave a sheepish, small smile. "I guess I'm just restless."
"I'll say," Hikari replied, raising an eyebrow. "I know it's the championship game, but for the last two years you weren't nearly as excited as this. In fact, you slept in so late you almost missed kickoff! What's so different about this year?"
"Well..." Taichi began, searching for a pretext, "like you said, I've almost missed the beginning of the games for the last two years. This year I want to make a better impression, especially as team captain." To be honest, he really didn't care about making an impression. He knew they wouldn't start the game without him, for he was, without a doubt, the team's star player. Had it been any other game, he would've slept in; however, this particular game had caused his nerves to go wild. His left foot was now twitching in anticipation, and the muscles in that leg tensed up because of it. He couldn't help but softly whimper as he looked back at the clock.
"Onii-chan..." Hikari began, almost in a whisper, "that's not the real reason, is it?"
Taichi sat the water bottle on the kitchen table and wandered over to the windows. Gray clouds were moving in over the sky, and a light mist dusted the top of the Ferris wheel. He stared at it as it spun in its place, going in a stationary circle, around and around, and also noticed that the space where they usually parked their car was unoccupied. His parents must've gone out to run some errands. He sighed. They'd missed his last championship game, too.
"Onii-chan? Please tell me what's wrong."
Taichi turned back to his sister, who was walking towards him with a concerned expression on her pale face. He placed his hand on top of her head, rustling her soft hair a bit. She looked up at him with a small smile.
"It's nothing, Hikari. I promise."
"Do you?" Her eyes were filled with worry, but they also seemed to dare him to lie.
He stared her straight in the eye, and, with all of his willpower, he muttered, "Of course."
I'm sorry, Hikari.
"Okay, onii-chan. But remember, I'm your sister. I'm always here." She gave him a tight hug and headed over to the kitchen, Taichi's apologetic gaze following her. She dove into the cold shelves of food for a moment, and a happy, smiling face peered back out from the refrigerator door. "Well, since we're both up, I think we should make a good breakfast, don't you think? We have the time, and it'll pass it."
"I shouldn't eat too much before a game. You know that, Hikari."
"I know, but I'm hungry, and it'll keep you busy."
Taichi's shoulders slumped as he glanced at the clock once more. Barely any time had gone by.
He smiled as Hikari started setting out eggs, rice, soy sauce, and other assorted vegetables. He felt so terrible, so guilty for keeping such a secret from his sister – one who wouldn't tell a soul. But something inside him was not ready, and he knew that his lips wouldn't be able to form the words even if he did try to tell her. He walked to the kitchen and opened up a cabinet of pots.
"As long as I don't get my uniform dirty."
Just as Taichi was finishing cleaning the dishes and refilling his water bottle (for Hikari had been right), he took a quick look outside, only to see tiny raindrops scattered all over the window. It was only drizzling, but Taichi silently prayed that it would stay that way, or even let up. Just as long as it didn't start to rain hard, the game would go on.
"Oh no, I hope it doesn't rain!" Hikari exclaimed as she noticed the weather. "I'll bring an umbrella just in case, though."
"Yeah, while you're all nice and dry under your umbrella, I'll be soaking wet and muddy," Taichi replied teasingly.
"Oh, I know how much boys love getting dirty. Kaa-san will have a fit, though!" Hikari laughed.
Taichi smiled as he laced up his cleats, although his feet were still begging for a soccer ball.
"We'll leave in five minutes, okay?" Hikari said as she searched a closet for an umbrella.
Taichi leaned against the window and gazed out at the world below, trying to soothe the nervousness that was plaguing him…
"I'll be there," he had said. "I promise, Taichi-san. I wouldn't miss it for the world."
Taichi smiled a little bit, but this thought only made his stomach lurch more. The fog outside seemed to blur his vision, and the only clear image in his mind's eye was that of red hair and dark, ebony eyes.
Koushirou had never come to one of Taichi's soccer games. It wasn't that he didn't care, but he always was so busy between his extensive amounts of homework, the computer, and chores. However, this time, he had especially set aside time to come and watch Taichi's championship game.
"I'm really excited, Taichi-san," Koushirou had told him openly. "I haven't seen you play in so long. Do you remember when we played soccer together before the Digital World? That was the last time." His eyes almost seemed to glimmer at the thought.
Taichi had given him the same look in return but had quickly turned away to avoid blushing.
He held his stomach as it churned. With Koushirou going to be watching him, it was impossible not to be anxious. He wanted so badly to impress him, so badly to have him swooning over his powerful kicks, strategic passes, and graceful speed. He wanted to give a performance that Koushirou would never forget.
Perhaps then, he would look at him differently.
Taichi let a gooey smile spread onto his face at the thought, but the reality of the game was fast-approaching. He sighed again as he clutched his unruly stomach. There must be a Ferris wheel in there, he groaned inwardly, going so fast that it made his insides dizzy…a Ferris wheel with a bunch of little Koushirous as its riders…
"Ready onii-chan?"
Taichi whirled around to his sister, decked in a shiny pink raincoat and carrying a black umbrella. She held out his water bottle with an encouraging smile. "You guys will win for sure!"
Taichi accepted the bottle and nervously replied, "I hope so, Hikari. I really, really hope so."
They had won the championship for the past two years, and the whole team badly wanted a third trophy to display in the case the front of the school. The celebrations had been wonderful, but for Taichi, they had not been complete without Koushirou.
As the two siblings walked towards the stadium, the Ferris wheel inside Taichi began to spin faster. His heart beat like a drum, and blood pounded in his head. Usually, if he ever was a bit nervous for a game, the adrenaline gave him an exhilarating rush. But that day, it almost seemed to paralyze him.
The grass on the field was slightly wet, and his cleats were already covered in grass by the time he reached his coach and team. They welcomed him with several slaps on his back, commenting on how early he was that year and trying to get him riled up, for they noticed his anxiety.
Soon afterwards, they began to run laps around the field, around and around, and they were shortly followed by the opposing team. Its rampant brown trailed behind the red blur of Taichi's team, and soon, the colors speckled the field like the raindrops on the window.
Taichi kept scanning the stadium, and each time, he would see a new Chosen Child meet Hikari, but it was never Koushirou.
He's on his way now, I know he is. He'd never break his promise. That's not Koushirou.
Yet still, the beginning of the game drew nearer, and Taichi was almost ready to run away, search for Koushirou, and drag him to the game. He so wanted to astound him, so wanted to make him see that even though he wasn't a genius, he could still excel in something.
He practiced shots at the goal with his other teammates, but the few times he did score, it was just barely. In fact, the goalkeeper had blocked most of them, and Taichi could tell that the others were beginning to get very nervous.
"Yagami!" Taichi's coach called to him. "Get over there for the coin toss!"
Taichi feet robotically took him to center field, but his focus was still on the people watching. He mechanically shook hands with the captain of the opposing team, muttered, "Tails," and gave a satisfied smile as the coin landed in his team's favor – they would start with the ball. Taichi reported this back to his coach, who grinned widely at the news.
The coach called over the rest of the team for some last encouraging words, but Taichi was too focused on the entrance to the stadium. His heart jumped up to his throat as he spotted red hair, only to sigh in disappointment and frustration as he saw that it was a girl with a significantly short haircut.
"Yagami?"
He looked over, almost dazed from being broken out of his trance. "Y-yeah?"
"Are you alright? Can you play? Please tell me yes." The coach looked excruciatingly worried.
"I'm fine, I'm fine. Don't worry."
"Alright, well, good luck boys."
Taichi was only half-heartedly in the cheer as he looked back for his red-head. Still nothing.
The shrill whistle pierced the air, and the sounds of the coach's directions were fuzzy in Taichi's ears. All he wanted to hear was the encouraging words of Koushirou – nothing else.
"Yagami! What are you doing? Stop daydreaming and get out there!"
Taichi heaved a deep sigh as he forced himself to head onto the field as the center forward. He tried to shift his concentration to the game, but that was impossible. He still couldn't believe that Koushirou wasn't there yet.
The other team's eyes glared at him; they wanted the championship, and they wanted it badly. They knew of Taichi's impeccable soccer talent, and their expressions reflected resent of it.
Focus on the game. Kick those bastards to the ground... Damn, why can't Koushirou be here to see this? ...NO! I have to stop thinking about-
And the whistle blew. The game began.
Taichi was surprised when the ball immediately rolled to his feet, and his slight hesitation helped the other team to run up to him easily. He tried to swerve around the two incoming players, but one swiftly stole it, and Taichi cursed in frustration.
"Yagami! What was that!?"
"Sorry, sorry!" Taichi apologized, rushing to follow the thieves. "Bad start, I'll be fine!"
Luckily, the defense was on their game, and one of them gave a carefully-aimed kick to one of the other forwards. Taichi closed his eyes for a few moments, trying to gain his focus.
It's okay... So what if he isn't here... I still have the game to worry about, and it's more important...
Right?
Still, he couldn't help but glance towards the stands again. No red-head was to been found.
He cursed again under his breath, and his eyes followed the ball which the opposing teams were bandying back and forth on the other side of the field. He ran up past the center circle, hoping that his team would gain control.
One staggeringly tall enemy player emerged with the ball, and Taichi ran up to challenge him.
"Go Taichi, go!"
Usually, he was able to tune out the cheers of his friends so they wouldn't distract him, but this time, he looked.
And his opponent passed right by him.
"Yagami-senpai, are you feeling all right?" one of his teammates asked, looking terribly concerned.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry. They haven't even scored a goal-"
The sound of the whistle and the cheering of the rivals' supporters interrupted him.
"...yet."
His teammate gave him a sharp glare. "You know we're counting on you, right?"
"Yeah, well, maybe I shouldn't be the only one doing all the work!" Taichi didn't even pause to see the boy's reaction as he sprinted back to his starting position. He scowled to himself. He knew how much he loved to control the game, score the majority of the goals, and ride on the shoulders of his cheering teammates at the end of a victory. But then he wished that the pressure wasn't all on him, that for once, he could take a break.
Besides, there was no one to impress anyway.
The ball was kicked-off again, and this time, it wasn't passed to Taichi. He frowned but couldn't help but be a little thankful.
He managed to get control of the ball a few times, and he even got close to scoring a goal, but it was obvious to everyone that his mind was not on the game.
Taichi was relieved when the whistle blew for halftime. He gulped down half of his water bottle and took another glance towards Hikari and the Chosen Children. They were all walking towards him, looking rather confused. He sighed as he anticipated the expected questions.
"Onii-chan!" Hikari called, waving and running over to him. "Oh, onii-chan, I knew that something was wrong this morning!"
"Yeah, Taichi, what's up? I've never seen you play like this," Yamato agreed, trying to ignore the ogling eyes of other teenage girls at the game.
"I...I guess I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed..."
"Really, Yagami?"
Taichi grimaced as he turned around to face a rather frustrated and angry coach.
"What's the matter with you!? You work your ass off during the week and then you decide to slack off during the actual game? Do you want to lose the championship, Yagami? Do you want to let the entire team and your friends down? Do you-"
"Since when is all of the responsibility on me?"
The coach was taken aback. "I...it's...it's just always been that way..."
"Yeah, well, did it ever occur to you that maybe I'm not perfect? That maybe I'd just happen to have a bad day? Maybe you ought to have taken that into consideration!"
The coach looked away, not saying anything.
Taichi took a deep breath and exhaled loudly, trying to calm down. "Look, we're only losing by one point. We still have plenty of time to catch up."
The coached sighed. "You'll be okay?"
"Yeah, whatever." With an apathetic wave of his hand, he walked away. He stared at the scoreboard, blazing with the number "0" and "1."
"Onii-chan?" Hikari meekly and cautiously walked up next to her brother. "Please tell me what's wrong."
"Nothing's wrong! I've said that ten million times today!"
"You promised me, Taichi, and you lied."
"I did not!"
Then softly, she whispered, "Is it because Koushirou-san isn't here?"
"For the last time, Hikari, nothing is wrong!" And he stomped off with tears stinging his eyes.
How did she know? How did she know?
The whistle blew once more for the second half to start.
Taichi rubbed his eyes on the sleeve of his red jersey and ran to the opposite side of the field since the teams switched sides. He furrowed his eyebrows, trying to concentrate. The opposing center forward balanced his cleat on the top of the soccer ball. He had this sick grin on his face as he looked at Taichi, right in the eye.
That guy has it coming to him... Taichi thought to himself.
At the sound of the whistle, Taichi sprung to life, lunging forward, stealing the ball, and springing towards the goal. He dodged the incoming players and approached the goalkeeper, and with a mighty swing of his foot, he kicked the ball with all of his power. It flashed past the goalkeeper before he could even think about blinking.
An eruption of cheers exploded from their supporters.
"That's the way to do it, Yagami! Took you long enough!"
Yeah, yeah, that's right... I own this field, whether Koushirou is here to see me or not!
The other team started with the ball again, and the opposing attacker's glare was even more acidic than before.
That guy is really starting to piss me off! Taichi returned the glare just as sharply.
He tried his best during the rest of the game, but every time the thought of Koushirou entered his mind, the enemy would gain an advantage. By the last five minutes, both teams managed to score two more goals. With the game tied 3 to 3, the adrenaline on the field was quickly rising. Aggression permeated the place, and the people of the crowd in the stands were on the edge of their seats.
The weather had been particularly kind to them. It had gotten no worse than a light drizzle, but even so, Taichi's hair was starting to droop in front of his eyes. He tossed his head to clear his vision and dug his cleats deep into the ground, which had grown to be quite muddy. But suddenly, with a loud boom of thunder, a large downpour threw itself onto the stadium, and the onlookers quickly got out their umbrellas. Taichi watched as Takeru huddled close to Hikari under her black umbrella and gave Taichi a thumbs-up. The fiery brunet nodded and reveled in the rain.
"Just five more minutes to go, we can do this!" The coach's voice echoed onto the field within the blur of cheering, rain, and pattering hearts.
Koushirou...that little...he didn't come...how could he? ...I'll make him sorry he missed me...
That one rival forward was practically burning a hole in Taichi's forehead.
I can't take that guy anymore! If he doesn't watch it...
As Taichi planned to set himself up for a pass, the attacker sauntered past him and muttered in his ear: "Faggot."
Oh that is it!
With a sudden wave of fury, Taichi tore through the grass towards the boy with tremendous force and knocked him to the ground. He began throwing punches this way and that, aiming for his eyes, his nose, and his teeth, shouting, "How dare you call me that! How dare you fucking insult me! I'll make you pay for even thinking that!"
The coach and the other players quickly ran over to the two boys and desperately tried to pull them apart, but their effort was not enough. It took all of six guys to finally throw Taichi off of the boy.
And he landed flat on his back in the mud.
He looked up, the pouring rain stinging his eyes, and the heads of several teammates surrounded him. Their shouts and demanding questions were nothing but a blur of sounds as the reality of what he had done began to hit him right in the face.
"What the hell is your problem!?"
"They could disqualify us for all we know!"
"Team captain my ass!"
"Fuck you, Yagami!"
Through all of the screaming and raving, the coach's head appeared.
"You've been given a red card, Yagami. Get the hell off of my field."
Avoiding everyone's gaze, with his eyes looking down at his feet, he got up, soaked in rain and mud, and began to walk off the field. Two players were helping the boy he had beaten up, who now had two black eyes, a broken tooth, and a nosebleed. He couldn't even look at the sight. He deserved it, he deserved it, he deserved it, he kept saying to himself. But he knew how in the end, it wasn't going to be worth it. Hikari and his friends were all going to be disappointed in him, and while his soccer team's opinion mattered, those opinions mattered more.
Now I'm kind of glad Koushirou didn't show up...
Then he looked up.
Oh god.
Standing at the entrance of the stadium, decked in his school uniform and staring right at Taichi, was the red-haired, ebony-eyed Izumi Koushirou himself.
And Taichi lost it.
Tears began streaming down his cheeks as he ran up the opposite stairs, completely ignoring the calls of "Taichi! Taichi!" from the other Chosen Children. He ran and ran and ran until he couldn't run anymore, and he simply leaned against a brick wall of a building and cried.
"Now what is he going to think of me?" he screamed to the angry sky. "He's just going to think that I'm some rash jerk who can't play soccer worth shit and just beats up anyone in my way! Oh wait, that's right, I am! That's why he doesn't like me! That's why I'll never, ever have him..." He sobbed until no more tears would come out, and he stood there for awhile, letting the rain soak through his skin, feeling humiliated and childish for crying.
"T-Taichi-san?"
He glanced behind his shoulder before instantly resuming looking down at the ground as he saw a drenched, panting Koushirou.
"Taichi-san...I...I'm so sorry..."
"Are you?" Taichi retorted bitterly.
"Taichi-san, I can't even begin to express how terrible I feel! I promised you that I would come, and I broke that promise. I'm sorry, Taichi-san. I'm so, so sorry."
"If you had really wanted to come that much, why didn't you?" Taichi still would not look at the boy. He didn't want to cry again. He already felt demoralized enough as it was.
"There was a major server crash at the school, and it was something that absolutely couldn't wait. I tried to convince them to find someone else because I was busy, but they said that they needed me most. And well...I have an obligation."
Taichi knew Koushirou's reason was valid, but he still refused to accept it, being as stubborn as he was.
"Taichi-san...I..."
"I don't want to hear it, Koushirou. I don't want to hear it ever!" He was trying so hard not to break down again. "All I wanted to do today was impress you, Koushirou! I wanted, no, needed you to see me as someone more than just this stupid hothead, and, well, let's just say that's exactly who you saw! And that's not...that's not what I wanted you to see... You just... It was because you weren't there that I fucked up so badly! I was too busy wondering where you were! I can't even look at you right now... I don't know if I can even speak to you..."
His face was hard, yet the corners of his mouth wobbled as he let the words sink in. Oh dear god, he's never going to want to talk to me again...
Yet suddenly, he felt arms wrap around his waist in an embrace.
A hot flush washing over his cheeks, his body flinched at the touch and his tongue melted into his mouth, unable to speak. Koushirou's thin, yet gentle arms were wrapped around him, his face buried in Taichi's dirtied jersey.
"Taichi-san, please don't do this to me. You have no idea how much this agonizes me! Please, Taichi-san, I...I..."
"You...you what?" Taichi's heart was pounding faster than ever.
"I love you."
There was silence for a moment, save for the rain dropping into the puddles and splashing onto the rooftops. Thunder crashed and lightning flashed, yet Taichi stood in his spot, trying to process exactly what Koushirou had just said.
"Wh-what?"
"I love you, Taichi-san. I-I need you to know that. You must know that if it ever seems as though I don't care about you, you're all wrong. I care for you more than you'll ever, ever know. You don't have to try to impress me, Taichi-san, because you do without trying. Every day. You've been proving it to me for a long, long time."
Koushirou simply stood there, hugging him tightly, and Taichi couldn't help but break into a small smile and look back at him, admiring him.
He turned around and wrapped his arms around Koushirou's neck and softly asked, "Do you have any idea how sexy you are when your hair is wet?"
His dark eyes widening and a bright, rosy blush spreading across his cheeks, Koushirou stammered, "I-I-I...I've never been called...'sexy' before..."
"Well..." Taichi began, taking a deep breath, "you better get used to it."
"Taichi, I don't under-"
"I love you, too, you idiot! I've been trying to show you that for who-knows-how-long!"
Koushirou stared at him in disbelief for a moment, but his astonished expression evolved into a relieved one. And he replied, "Well, then, I suppose that we can be considered, um..."
"To be 'going out?' 'Boyfriends?' 'Significant others?' Koushirou, I don't care what they hell people label us. As long as I have you, that's all that matters."
Koushirou's blush deepened, flattered beyond all comprehension. "Taichi-san..."
Taichi exhaled a deep sigh of relief as the rain suddenly began to let up. They boys looked up at the sky as the clouds began to break, letting in streams of sunlight.
"So...do you know what happened in the last minutes of the game?"
"Well," Koushirou explained, "I tried to find you for a little while, but I ended up going the wrong way, so I winded up back at the stadium, and, well..."
"Please tell me that there was some miraculous effort from my team and we managed to somehow win."
Koushirou gave a half-remorseful, yet half-amused look. "You lost 5 to 3."
"Ouch." The team really was worthless without him. The other team had managed to score two goals in the last five minutes? That was pretty pathetic.
"I'm sorry, Taichi-san. I know how much you wanted to win."
"Not really, actually," Taichi replied, putting his arm around the red-head. "I'd say that the prize I've just won is one that I've wanted to win more than anything in my entire life."