M*A*S*H: What If... Henry Blake had lived?
August, 1952: 4077th M*A*S*H, Korea.
Hawkeye Pierce sat in his tent with his best friend, Trapper John McIntyre. He poured a martini out of the still and passed it to Trapper before making one for himself.
"Do you hear that, Trap?" Hawkeye asked.
"No." Trapper replied.
"Exactly, Frank isn't here! He's in his own tent, he might be commanding officer, but at least we don't have to live with him!" Hawkeye said, smiling. "I'll get to go on R&R in a few days too!"
"You sure live the good life, Hawk." Trapper said.
Suddenly a rapid knock came on the door. Hawkeye stood up and opened it, revealing Corporal Radar O'Reilly holding the mailbag.
"Mail call!" Radar shouted. "Got a few letters for Dr. McIntyre, a nudist magazine for Dr. Pierce and oh!"
"What is it?" Hawkeye and Trapper asked.
"It's a letter addressed to the both of you, and Major Burns, and Major Houlihan, and me!" Radar shouted.
"Who's it from?" Trapper asked.
"Mr. Henry Braymore Blake, of Bloomington, Illinois." Radar said, grinning.
"The former Lieutenant Colonel?" Hawkeye asked.
"The very same!" Radar said.
"Oh boy!" Trapper said. "We haven't heard from him since he got out of this place!"
"Radar, go to get Frank and Hot Lips and have them meet us in the office." Hawkeye said. "I'd open it here but Frank would have a fit for me opening his mail."
Later, the group sat in what used to be Henry's but now was Frank's office. Radar opened the envelope and took the letter out.
"Let me see that, Corporal!" Frank said.
"Hey, it's addressed to me too! I have every right to look at it first!" Radar said.
"Don't get smart with me, Corporal or I'll have you busted back to Civilian!" Frank said.
"Read the letter, Radar!" Hawkeye said.
"Okay." Radar said. "Ahem!"
"Get on with it!" Hot Lips shouted.
"I am, I am!" Radar said. "Dear Doctors and Radar, It's Former Colonel Blake. I got home last week and wanted to write you about how life is back in the states. The plane ride was bumpy, but once I saw my wife and kids waiting for me at the terminal in Bloomington, the past few years slipped away. It was like I never left. I do want to say that I do miss you guys, but I wish we had met under better circumstances. I know I left you guys with what I told you, but I just want to say how wonderful you guys were, and I hope that you continue the 97% casualty survival rate that we got together. Abyssinia, Lt. Colonel Henry Blake."
"Good old, Henry. I really do miss him. But I guess his family probably missed him more." Hawkeye said.
"Can't wait til I get to go home." Trapper said. "See my wife and kids again."
"But if you leave who's going to drive me home from the war?" Hawkeye asked.
"Shut it, Pierce. If the letter's over, you can all get out of my office!" Frank shouted.
As Hawkeye, Trapper and Radar began to leave, Frank grabbed Radar's shoulder.
"Not you, Corporal, you have files to refile." Frank said.
"But I refiled them yesterday, sir." Radar said.
"Well, do it again!" Frank shouted.
"I hope you get sent home next..." Radar muttered.
"What was that, Corporal?" Frank asked.
"Oh, nothing sir..." Radar replied.
The End.