Author's Note: So, this started out as a one-shot, but little did I know I was apparently embarking on the never-ending one-shot. Seriously, I got to about five thousand words and I'm like, "Crap, I'm nowhere near done.". It just doesn't end...ever. And so, it kind of became it's own multi-chapter story. I'm seriously having so much fun writing this story (probably because I'm just kind of writing loads of crap at this point, but oh well.). I've been writing this story for over two months (off and on), but it's just too much fun to ever end.

Anyway, this story takes place during "Sonny in the Middle". It's my version of the tale of Chad, Zora and Tawni while Sonny is busy with Nico and Grady. Yes, that's right. This is probably the most Zora I have ever written in one story. I don't know if I got her just right...at certain points I think I gave her a response Sonny would have, but I did my best with her.

So yeah...enough about me, tell me about you?

Disclaimer: I don't own anything Sonny with a Chance related.

***

Sigh, the text on his phone read.

Sigh… and nothing more.

That creepy, sad kid was trying to hint at something, but since today's script didn't specifically state how to deal with a text from a sad kid, he stared blankly at his phone. There really wasn't anything else he could do. He wasn't qualified to come up with plots on his own; that's why they paid those writers good money.

Maybe he should just delete the messages and act as if he had never received such a message, should she ask. But alas, he felt a pang of guilt, thinking back on the large, sad eyes she gave him when she asked if he would disappoint her.

His thoughts moved to Sonny and how busy she was with the whole Rainy and Cloudy mess she had created. She was always busy now keeping them happy and content that she was neglecting the little one, thus making her sad and unloved.

This whole sad kid business was really starting to bug him. He was Chad Dylan Cooper. Why should he care if some Random was unhappy? Especially the little one who tricked him into going to see the dead giraffes. She should be miserable after that…But once more the stupid guilt welled up in him. He should at least reply with a simple, "What, Random? I'm busy. Unlike you.".

He typed the message and sent it, but as he did it dawned on him that he had never given any Randoms -- expect for Sonny, of course -- his number. How in the world did the creepy one get it? She must have been creeping around his dressing room looking at his phone like an obsessed fan. He always knew she secretly loved him. Who didn't?

Chad smirked to himself as he waited impatiently for her response.

Nearly three agonizing minutes of waiting later, his phone vibrated on one of the many tables that littered his lavish dressing room. He opened the message anxiously after having to wait so long and read her reply.

I only wanted to see Monkey Cars 3-D with the greatest actor of our generation.

She had him with the phrase "greatest actor of our generation." He did not want her going with anyone else now. That might imply the wrong message, that someone other than Chad Dylan Cooper is the greatest actor of our generation.

And though, it would hurt his reputation to be seen with a Random; it would kill his reputation to let her go with someone like Zac Efron. Taking Zac would thus be implying that he is the greatest actor of our generation and not the rightful owner of the title, also known as Mister Chad Dylan Cooper.

His reply to her came quicker this time.

Well, in that case. You're about to see Monkey Cars 3-D with T.V.'s Chad Dylan Cooper.

Thirty seconds later, the reply came.

Great! :D The movie starts at 6. I'll meet you at your car in five minutes.

He blinked a few seconds, before comprehending her message. There was something really off and strange about it, but he couldn't quite put his finger on it. All this thinking was far too much work for the heartthrob. He wasn't paid to think, that's why there are writers.

After ten minutes of thinking, he finally realized what was off.

Five minutes? Was she nuts? It was only two in the afternoon; the movie wasn't starting until six. What the heck did she expect them to do for four hours? Color pretty pictures? Since she was like eight-years-old or something, right? Or maybe she was planning to go back to that place of horrors?

Chad stopped his thought process.

No way. There wasn't a thing that creepy little monster could do to drag him back to that – that – that mentally scarring, festering flesh smelling, dead giraffe graveyard. It was horrible enough the first time; he really didn't need to relive the moment.

He typed swiftly on his iPhone his response.

What do you expect me to do with you for four hours? Chad Dylan Cooper doesn't babysit.

With the message sent, he paced about his dressing room, waiting impatiently once more. All this waiting was driving him crazy. Chad Dylan Cooper waited for no one; especially not some crazy, gnome loving, creepy Random girl.

The response came three seconds later.

Hey, I'm at your car. And I brought a friend.

It was official, she was nuts.

Nuts and waiting at his car with one of her crazy friends. His baby was probably trashed at this point. Was there any real reason use in looking out her window at the horror that was his formerly his precious, innocent convertible?

He scrunched his face, cringing already at the sight he was going to see should he look out his window towards his car. He really didn't want to know what had happened to his little baby by now.

He replied with a heavy heart thinking of his poor convertible.

I'll be out in a second.

He took a deep breath and grabbed his keys on the way towards his dressing room door. If his car was destroyed, this would be the second one in the past month that the creepy girl had killed. He shuddered at the memory of his former little girl being filled with elephant manure. Poor, poor little baby. She was so young. She had been practically a newborn at the time of the incident. She was just another innocent life taken too, too soon.

Chad closed his eyes tightly as he walked from the doors of Studio 11 into the parking lot. He didn't want to be shocked by the horror that now was his car as soon as he stepped out of the building, so he kept his eyes shut. He would need to mentally prepare himself for the mess he was going to have to clean up. The poor little thing probably didn't even stand a chance when it came to that monster.

He knew exactly where his car was parked, even with his eyes closed. For the past three years, his parking spot has been exactly the same. Though only recently did he have the solid gold sign with his name on it placed in front of his car. It glittered majestically for the King of Drama, for whom the sign was engraved for.

Chad has his arms stretched out warm him in case he was about to crash into some obstruction. He waved them around wilding as he walked, to make sure all his bases were covered.

It was not long before he did in fact hit something -- or should I say someone.

"Hey," the girl's voice yelled, smacking his arms down. Chad's arms sprung right back into their original positioned and accidently touched the girl again. She apparently wasn't any happier being touched this time than last time.

"Hey!" This time the instead of smacking his arms down, the girl smacked him across the face. "Nobody gets inside Tawni Hart's bubble, besides Tawni Hart -- and on certain occasions, James Conroy. But that's it!"

Chad recoiled from the impact of her hand, opening his eyes to finally see Tawni standing before him. She glared wildly at him, telling him with her eyes that he was far too close to her. Her personal space was precious – almost as precious as his car – and she would never let anyone (Well, besides James on some occasions.) intrude on it.

Chad took a huge step backward away from the crazed beauty queen.

"Well, this is good," Zora's voice lofted over to where Chad and Tawni stood staring at each other. "You're already acquainted with my guest." She motioned to Tawni, who shot another glare at Chad.

"Tawni is your friend?" Chad was appalled. From what Sonny had always told him and from what he knew about her, both he and Tawni had the exact same friends; also known as me, myself and I – No Zora Lancaster at all.

"Well, of course, Zora and I are – " Tawni cringed when she thought the word. "Friends…We're practically family. I'm the beautiful aunt, and Zora is the…ummm…"

"The weird, creepy girl that lives next door," Chad offered, staring at Zora, who grinned wickedly at him. He winced, already imagining what she was planning for this afternoon.

Tawni thought about it a second. "No, no. I was thinking more along the lines of Sonny's creepy, little daughter, which Aunt Tawni takes care of when Sonny is being a very uncaring and neglectful mother. Like now for instance."

"I don't think she's Sonny's creepy daughter," Chad continued the conversation, "I was thinking more of either Rainy or Cloudy's –"

"Will you two please shut it!" Zora finally broke in. "There is no way I'd want to be related to any one of you people! Now, come on, we only have three hours, fourteen minutes, thirty-six seconds, and twenty-two milliseconds before the movie starts!" She shoved them both towards the car.

"Okay, okay." Chad said as he checked his watch. He hopped in the driver's seat, brushing his hair from his eyes. He had to make sure that he looked like a god next to these Randoms; not that it was hard for him to look like a god.

Tawni resisted though, digging her heels in pavement, causing Zora to fall backwards to the ground.

"Tawni! Get in the car!" Zora instructed, lifted herself from the ground. She turned to face Tawni, who folded hers and was tapping her foot loudly upon the pavement of the parking lot.

"No, no. Tawni Hart does not ride "shotgun"", she made air quotes around the word 'shotgun' as she spoke them. "Tawni Hart is an independent woman, who drives herself where she needs to go." She pouted out her lips.

"Chad," Zora turned to him. Though he was too lost in his reflection to realize she was speaking to him. He kissed the air at his reflection in the mirror to pretending that he was kissing his own beautiful image. All the while, he flipped and tossed his hair into a perfect mess.

Zora was becoming increasingly irritated with both Chad and Tawni. If these two hadn't been able to drive and hadn't been so easily manipulated into things, she would have never asked either one to come with her to see possibly the greatest movie of all time. She beginning to realize that they both had the attention span of a fish and the IQ of a toaster.

"Chad!" She yelled in his ear. He jumped, hitting his forehead off of his rear view mirror. He groaned rubbing his forehead.

"What!?" He replied, clearly annoyed with the young Random. "Can't you see I'm sort of in the middle of something?"

"Chad, Tawni won't come with us, unless she drives." Zora pointed toward Tawni pouting.

"Oh no, Chad Dylan Cooper does not ride in a Random's car. Let alone ride in the back of a Random's car." He glared at Tawni, who replied with a glare of her own.

"Who says were taking my car?" Tawni pointed to herself.

"Tawni's got a point," Zora agreed. "With gas prices high, only the greatest actor of our generation can pay to drive anymore. And plus, we're already standing at your car. We should just take it."

Chad's face twisted from confusion to anger in a matter of seconds. "Oh no, no; there is no way I'm letting some Random drive my beautiful little girl. I'll never be able to get rid of Blondie's skink from my steering wheel after she touches it. I'm already going to have to scrub the smell of talentless, nobodies from the fabrics. I don't need any more work."

"Chad," Zora started walking closer to the car. "We both know you're not going to do any work cleaning."

"Your point?" He replied, holding tightly onto the steering wheel in case they tried to pull him forcefully from the driver's seat.

"Chad, get out of the car." Zora opened the driver's side door in an attempt to drag Chad from the car. Unfortunately for her, Chad was well prepared for this sort of event. He tightened his grip around the steering wheel and held on as Zora tugged at his arm.

"Oh come on." Zora let go of his sleeve. "You two are terrible! Whatever possessed me to EVER want to go anywhere with either of you is completely gone! Why are you both so difficult!?"

Zora began sobbing on the spot. Chad and Tawni both turned to each other; each of them asking with their eyes what to do about the crying girl. Neither one of them was trained for moments such as these.

Chad shrugged, pulling out the MacKenzie Falls script. "There are no crying little girls in this week's script. You got anything?"

Tawni shook her head. "We've got a "Gary and Larry" sketch this week. No crying girls." Tawni stopped for a second to think. "Though when I hit Grady with the frying pan after he used it to clip his toenails in, he did cry like a girl. Does that count?"

Chad thought about it for a moment. "So, our solution is to hit her with a frying pan until she stops crying…" He made a face. "Why do I suddenly feel as if that is wrong?" He scrunched his face more.

"Oh," Tawni's face lit up. "I know what that is! It's this awful thing called "caring". It makes you all sweaty, nervous and uneasy. I was suffering from it once, but luckily, I survived." She wiped her forehead with her hand to symbolize the relief she felt.

Chad looked panicked. "We have got to stop this – this – this caring nonsense. Chad Dylan Cooper does not get all sweaty and nervous for any Random!"

Well, he thought, except for one, but the creepy kid isn't her.

"Oh," Tawni's face lit up once more. "I know how to stop it. We have to make her feel better, and then the dreaded caring will stop." She started to breathe faster as she spoke her words. She could feel her heart racing; it pounded hard in her chest.

"Darn it!" Tawni yelled. "This caring stuff is contagious!" She raced over to the car, pulling Chad out of the driver's seat and tossing him to the pavement.

"What are you doing!?" Chad said, as he fought against Tawni, before she succeeded in getting and a hold of his jacket and throwing him on the ground. He rolled a few times on the ground after she threw him from the car.

"Curing this terrible caring!" Tawni turned to Zora with a smile. "Zora, get in the car! Aunt Tawni is taking you to see Monkey Cars 3-D!"

"Great!" Zora's plan had worked. She knew if she got the two of them guilty, they would give into her demands. It was a simple, but highly effective plan. She smiled impishly at Chad sitting on the ground, as she walked to the car.

Chad jumped to his feet and proceeded towards Tawni angrily. She slammed the door in his face. He tugged on the door handle, connected to the now locked door. Chad struggled with the door handle for a few moments longer, before whacking his hand against the side of the door, glaring crazily at Tawni, who grinned.

"Oh no! You two are not—" Chad's voice was lost in the roar of the engine as Tawni turned on the convertible.

"What was that, Chad?" Tawni asked mockingly. "I can't hear from inside your car." Her grin increased in size.

Zora hopped into the backseat and called to Chad. "Get in the passenger's seat! We've only got three hours, six minutes, twenty-nine seconds, and forty-four minutes before the show starts! Do you want to make us late!?"

Chad growled, but obeyed. He couldn't just let them escape to who-knows-where with his little baby. He had to be there to protect her from them.

He crossed his arms and stared angrily at Tawni sitting the driver's seat. She didn't even take notice. Her attention was too consumed in her own reflection as she primped and puffed herself in the rear view mirror. She pulled her handy-dandy Coco Moco Coco lipstick from her purse and applied a healthy layer, before she knew she was ready to go.

"Alright," Tawni smiled, grabbing a tight hold of the steering wheel. "And we're off."

***

Author's Note: So, how was that? Enjoyable. Lovable. Stupid. Smelly. Cute. Funny. Tehoewjwrhfdkhfvod (I just made that word up! It means whatever you want it to mean...(Though I think it means this story was looks like it was written by a bowl of French Onion Soup.)). Okay, well I'm going to go now... Goodbye. Hope it wasn't too terrible... Thank you for reading. :D