Just Because They Die

Author:  Robin Nance

Rating:  PG-13, drama, Jack/Chloe (non-sexual, non-romance…really, I'm not that twisted!)

Author's Notes: This story came about as a rebellion against the general let-down of "Reunion.". When I re-watched the Jack/Chloe "therapy sessions" it struck me that, taken out of Kronishized canon context, these were two characters who had a lot to say to one another. In that vein, this fic picks up where Chloe's first meeting with "Dr. Greene" leaves off….

Spoilers:  Through season 4 and "Reunion"

Disclaimer: Not my toys to play with, or else Jack and Chloe would've had this chat awhile ago.

Feedback:  Wanted, needed, and appreciated here or at digital_doc_01@yahoo.com – not having been an eleven-year-old girl for some time, I'd love to know if I've convinced my Chloe to realistically speak like one!



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Just because they die, she said, doesn't mean they go away. --- "Permanence," Brian Andreas

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Monday 3:00 PM

Session One


"There's nothing wrong with me."

Chloe Waters shifted uncomfortably in the vinyl chair, weaving her fingers together and refusing to meet the gaze of the man seated across from her. He was silent, which she decided was his sign of disapproval after he stayed that way for a full minute.

"I mean, I know it was my mom's idea for me to talk to you. She thinks I'm all messed up and angry about stuff. And so what if I am? Angry, I mean. Because I'm not messed up, I'm fine."

She wound down awkwardly, mentally kicking herself over the magnitude of her lameness. Now he'd think she was a nut case for sure. She raised her eyes to his, expecting to meet the same somber analytical expression that her mother always seemed to be wearing lately, and was surprised to see a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

"And are you?" he asked. His voice had an unusual timbre, a growly unevenness coursing just below the smooth tones. "Angry, I mean. I don't think you're messed up either."

Chloe opened her mouth, then clamped it shut again. "Why should I tell you?" she responded after another minute of focusing on her fingers. "I know that anything I say to you will go right back to my mother."

The psychologist leaned toward her, resting his elbows on his knees; he had removed his glasses and was playing with the wire frames in much the same way she'd been fidgeting with her hands all afternoon.

"Let's get one thing straight, Chloe," he said in a strangely steely manner that made her glance up at him in surprise. Undiluted by the glasses, the intensity of his brown eyes was startling. "Whatever goes on in these sessions is just between you and me. Why, do you know that it's even against the law for me to tell anyone anything you say, unless you give me permission?" The eyes and voice softened as he settled back in his chair. "That means that here and now, you're entirely safe. You can just be Chloe Waters, and you can say and do and feel anything you want." He flicked his glance away and absently twisted a heavy gold ring on his left hand. "You can be angry with anyone in here -- even your mother."

She flinched before she could stop herself. "How did you -- why do you think I'm angry at her?"

He answered her with another smile. "Oh, it takes years and years of school and studying to get as good as I am," he remarked mildly. "And besides, every time I mention your mother your face and voice totally change. So I'm guessing that you're not too happy with her right now."

She flushed and squirmed miserably in the chair. "I guess not," she mumbled. Just saying the words made the guilt bubble up from deep inside and form a hard lump in her stomach. This was Mom, after all...and she'd already said such horrible things....

The doctor walked over to her chair, where he perched lightly on the arm, close beside her but not touching her. He must be a smoker, she thought; she caught a faint whiff of tobacco from his jacket, along with some light floral scent she couldn't identify. He waited patiently until she looked up at him.

"Chloe, there's nothing wrong with feeling angry," he said gently. "Anger doesn't make you a bad person. Feelings don't do anything, they just are. It doesn't mean you want bad things to happen to your mother – all it means is you're pissed off." He caught her grin. "Did I just say something funny?"

"I've never heard any of my mom's friends say things like 'pissed off' around me, that's all. They all probably think I'd, like, die of shock or something to hear the evil words."

He laughed at that. "Hey, anyone can spout psychology using big serious phrases. When things are really desperate they send for me and my Evil Words."

She decided that he had a nice laugh and she finally relaxed enough to smile back at him.

"You have a nice smile, Chloe Waters," Dr. Greene observed, and she actually felt herself blushing. "I don't think you've been able to show that smile very much lately, and I think we need to work together to make sure you keep it. Can we do that? Will you let me help you?" He knelt down in front of her and fixed her with his dark eyes again.

Chloe stared at him, unsettled by the frankness in his gaze. It was the first time in ages that someone had focused his full attention on her; it felt foreign, a vaguely guilty pleasure. Her eyes shifted over his shoulders and past his spiky blonde hair to the wall clock.

"Yeah, I guess. But it's four o'clock. It's time for me to go."

"Do you want to go?" He looked genuinely interested in her answer, almost like he was holding his breath until she said something.

"I don't mean it like that. I sort of didn't mind talking to you. I just figured that, you know, you probably have another appointment or something...." She trailed off, the mocking little voice inside her head supplying its opinion that of course he'd have something better to do, everyone always did when it came to her.

"No, I don't. I really am here for you, Chloe. We can take all the time you want."

She stared at him for a long minute, absorbing the words with a strange mixture of surprise and sadness. "Thanks, but I really should go anyway. Angel said she'd pick me up at four and I don't want her to worry."

"That's probably a good idea. OK, Chloe, see you tomorrow at three?"

"OK. Thanks, Dr. Greene."

"Eww, 'Dr. Greene.'" She looked back to find him wearing an exaggerated expression of distaste, and she couldn't help laughing out loud. "God, Chloe, you're making me sound all old and stuffy. Even I don't want to spend time with 'Dr. Greene.'"

"Well, what do you want me to do about it?" she giggled.

"You're going to be stuck with me for awhile, so you might as well drop the formalities."

Chloe shook her head; she couldn't believe that her mother actually associated with somebody so...normal and likable. Her eyes slid to the brass nameplate on his door. "Do you want me to call you Bruce?" she asked shyly, feeling somehow disrespectful.

He hesitated. "Y'know, I never did like that name. My friends call me Jay. Tomorrow, then?"

"OK, tomorrow. Bye, Jay."

"Bye, Chloe," Jack whispered to the closing door as a different, colder smile spread across his face.

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