It was a nice, sunny day in the Lylat System. Fox skipped around space in his Arwing singing the song "I'm in a hiiiiiiighway to Venom~!"

Inexplicably, his ship is attacked bya red laser and a voice announces: "Can't let you do that, Star Fucks!" It is... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... WOLF'S FACE!1sdfa1!/1! :O

Fox: "Yeah, yeah, can't let me do that. I know... What do you want?"

Wolf: "Prepare yourself, Fox. You won't be leaving here alive! Mwahahahahaha~"

After an intense dogfight that I won't write here for shit...

Wolf is on the ground after breaking through the glass of his ship. His face deformed horribly, his arms broken and his legs ripped off.

Fox: "You know what, Wolf? I'm getting sick and tired of having to shoot your ass down for you to leave me alone. I guess I should've killed you long ago and you know what? I'm gonna do it now..." *points blaster to Wolf's face*

Wolf: *starts crying emotionally* "Please, Fox... before you kill me... listen to what I have to say..."

Fox: *sigh* "OK, OK, do it quick, I don't have the whole day."

Wolf: "I... I love you... Fox McCloud!"

Fox: "You WHAT?! Since when?!11 #!$!"

Wolf: "I've always loved you, Fox... ever since I first saw you!"

Fox: "But... YOU TRIED TO KILL ME!"

Wolf: "I'm a mercenary, I'm forced to do things I don't want to!"

Fox: "No, Wolf. You picked the job because you're evil and you WANTED to kill me."

Wolf: "Says who?"

Fox: "This!" *pulls out the Player's Guide and throws it in Wolf's face and makes him even more deformed than before*

Fox: "Besides, you wanted to kill my father waaaaaaayyyyy before you turned into a mercenary!"

Wolf: "Please, Fox. Recognize my love! We were meant for each other! We are rivals!"

Fox: "Look, Wolf. I know I have Multiple Personality Disorder since I was born and all that, but none of them include you. Actually, I don't even think you're allowed to call this a rivalry *laughs* because you never won against me. Plus, I have a girlfriend and an actual rivalry with one of my teammates!"

Wolf: "But Fox-"

Fox: "Wait... My 64 personality is emerging... YOU KILLED MY FATHER YOU SON OF A BITCH ADKFGADKFGYAKDFYKADUYFK"

Fox: *pulls out blaster and shoots Wolf point-blank in the head as his dead body falls to the floor*

Fox: *shifts into Command's personality* "Woah, that was trippy. Oh, hey Wolf! You know where I can find Krystal? :D"

I SWEAR I DON'T HATE SHIPPING, BUT EVERY FANFIC IN THIS WEBSITE INVOLVING FOX AND WOLF ARE JUST... I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE I CAN START, THERE'S SO MANY PROBLEMS ON THEM. STARTING WITH, WOLF AND FOX WERE NEVER CANONICALLY IN LOVE, SO IT IRKS ME WHEN THEY PUT "I'VE ALWAYS LOVED YOU" AS AN EXCUSE TO SHIP THE TWO. AND WHEN THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO GET IN LOVE, THEY NEVER ADDRESS AND RESOLVE THEIR HISTORY OF TRYING TO KILL EACH OTHER, THEY JUST FALL IN LOVE LIKE THE MANY YEARS OF GOING AT EACH OTHER'S THROATS NEVER HAPPENED TO BEGIN WITH. AND MANY WRITERS STILL DON'T REMEMBER THAT FOX HAS A GIRLFRIEND, HE HAS TWO IF YOU COUNT FARA. SERIOUSLY GUYS.