Imagine that A.T.O.M. team grown and now lives more or less normal life. Although less likely, because to the ordinary test adventures added tests on the family front. Now the whole team has to deal with everyday problems, for example, take children to kindergarten after a good party. And it would be good, but it's Axel, Shark, King and Hawk!And who decides out of harm's way to help in this matter? Of course, Mr. English version of my russian fic.

One-shot. I know that events take place in the place, but the original story was written in January.

Unlucky Dads Or Instruction To A.T.O.M. For Children's Matinee After The New Year's Celebration.

My dear friends, (namely Axel, Shark, King and Hawk), if after the traditional to your circle fun time your wives made you take your kid to the kindergarten, then:

1) If you took a kid to kindergarten, you MUST definitely pick him/her up!
2) After you picked the kid up, make sure, that he/she is REALLY yours.
3) If the child is a stranger, do NOT make him/her call you 'Dad'.
4) (For Axel) and he/she should NOT be forced to train Jo-Lan.
5) (For King), and to eat your cooking too, DO NOT NEED! Murderers are never loved.
6) (For Hawk), and do NOT ask him/her about your appearance every five minutes, especially!
7) (For Shark) though pick this one up WHOLE!
8) If after you have brought the child home, your wives pounced on you, screaming (Hawk, yours still with the pan), be assured - the child is not RIGHT one.
9) Do not dare to object – DANGEROUS to health!
10) And do not dare to say "what's a difference anyway? Tomorrow morning back to the kindergarten again! "! I doubt you are AT LEAST alive after.
11) Yeah, yeah "AT LEAST"! I'm pretty sure about "whole and well" things!
12) After your wives kicked your asses and sent back for a child, count the wounds or you may be taken by an ambulance while on your way.
13) While bringing the child back, do NOT by chance go to the store, that next to the kindergarten.
14) Remember, the child has definitely not money for "to get drunk" thing.
15) Do NOT send him/her to the store either – they (sellers) will not sell.
16) Because he/she is a minor little brat.
17) It was not me, but the law has established.
18) For short – go to… kindergarten, of course.
19) Or soon you may be sent to…CENSORED.
20) If you went into the hall, and you came the child with a familiar appearance, but the question "Who are you? » said scientific treatise on the dangers of alcohol – you should go to the floor above.
21) Because there matinee younger group.
22) And you ran into my son, Jeddy.
23) Before leaving, do not forget to greet me.
24) Yes, I probably will. Jolly just do not get rid of me.
25) If you still limped up to the right floor, then let go of someone else's child at last!
26) And do not look for yours – he/she will come running to you himself/herself.
27) Because they are smart kids, and most importantly sober.
28) Then ask your child, where his/her bed is - in the next two hours you may need it.
29) Do NOT ask him/her for brine – he/she will not get it.
30) Because sober!
31) Do not put the footboard bouncing bunny - your child may be among them!
32) (To Hawk) Do NOT drum "Snowflakes" up either.
33) Because they will not come - minors.
34) And this is a crime!
35) It has already been: Hawk, read paragraph 17 three-fold.
36) Because you will NOT get it at first!
37) Also remember about your personal punishment, Hawk!
38) No, not heaven, but about the one that with a frying pan.
39) If you decide to accost to Mrs. Claus, remember that at first she is Santa's wife, and only then the only attractive woman across the hall.
40) And Santa can kick your ass!
41) (For Shark) No, Santa will not give you a gift. See paragraph 40!
42) (For King) if the Christmas tree obscures your view - then do not drag it into the other corner!
43) Simply pass by!
44) (For Axel), the phrase "Light On!" does not mean destroying the Christmas tree with the Jo-Lan wave!
45) (For Shark) do not steal these "beautiful glass" from a Christmas tree!
46) Excuse me for saying so, but why THE FUCK you need it?
47) Back to the attractive women theme – do not accost unattractive ones, too!
48) Because they have their husbands.
49) And they may kick your ass as good as Santa Claus!
50) (For Shark) No, reread paragraph 41.
51) If you still accost, then wait for the consequences.
52) Because your wives already know everything.
53) How? This riddle of life. They always know about it.
54) So be prepared for the scandal.
55) But before you go home, take your child!
56) (For Shark and King) are also advised to take the plugs for the ears.
57) Because Rachel and Susie will yell falsetto.
58) (For Axel) you had better bring the child home, but never set foot there.
59) Because your wife is Capoeira master!
60) For short – she will kill you!
61) (To Hawk) to you the same as for Axel, see paragraph 58.
62) In addition to this, run to the Canadian border.
63) Because your wife is a Terminator with PAN!
64) I am glad that the explanations are not needed.
65) If the next morning you woke up - you can rejoice.
66) Yes, already, because it means that after the showdown, you survived!
67) And if in the morning you do not have a call from the kindergarten with a request to take the child away from their schools for all - is doubly good.
68) Because it means that all of this was a dream.
69) And your wife took the kids for Matinee.
70) That means you can continue to celebrate!

Thanks a lot to AllCreator for translation :)