I thought this up while playing Summoner 2 with my three favourite characters - the three females, incidentally. It was written before I'd gotten through the Eleh Caverns, so it's very non-canonical thanks to the events later in the game.
I apologize in advance for the OOCness... but it's a comedy, so OOCness is good!...ish.

Disclaimer: Volition and THQ own all of this. Not me. Whatsoever.

"Come on, you two!" Maia dragged a protesting Sangaril by one arm, Iari following some distance behind with hesitant steps.

"I still do not understand the point of this." the android said.

Maia stopped in front of the tavern's doors, holding Sangaril firmly so that the petite Munari couldn't sneak away. "I told you Iari, it's for fun. Don't the Unseen have any concept of fun?"

She folded her arms. "Socializing in a bar is certainly not the Builders' concept of fun." she replied, a hint of annoyance in her artificial voice. "And besides, I believe the point of this excursion for a group of females would be to find an acceptable suitor. However, it is unlikely any Munari males are here, and you are the Queen of Halassar. As for myself, I am in no way interested or able to pursue that sort of relationship."

Maia raised an eyebrow. "How d'you know? Morbazan seems awfully interested in you..."

If looks could kill, Iari's would have. Of course, with her, it was a distinct possibility.

"Oookay, question answered then." She grinned, turning to the Munari beside her. "How about you, Sangaril? Ever thought about settling down?"

"Ever thought about stopping the sun from rising?" Sangaril countered, vainly trying to escape from Maia's iron grip. "It's never going to happen, trust me."

Her captor stroked her chin, pretending to think. "Well..."

"Forget it." Sangaril grumbled, knowing Maia would probably be able to think up some far-fetched idea. "Let's just get this over with."

Maia grinned again, and for the first time in her very short life, Iari felt nervous. And rightly so...

Next morning...

Maia groaned and rolled face down into her pillow as the curtains in her room were opened suddenly. She laid like that for a few minutes, listening as someone with light, certain steps moved about the room. Finally, she rolled back over, opening her eyes blearily. "Sangaril?"

"Oh, so you finally woke up." the Munari's voice came from somewhere out of Maia's view.

She groaned again and tried to sit up. "It feels like there's a couple hundred gladiators battling in my skull..."

Sangaril's head and shoulders appeared from around a corner. She didn't look too happy. "Serves you right."

"Hey!" Maia protested weakly.

The rest of Sangaril's body appeared. "Hey!? Is that all you can say?! Do you even know what I had to go through to get you back here!?" she didn't wait for a reply, but continued on hotly. "First of all, I had to get you out of that bar with you courting twenty-odd men, utterly DRUNK after THIRTEEN GALDYRAN ALES. Then, I had to CARRY you ALL the way back to the palace, which is Laharah knows how far from that tavern. And FINALLY, I had to get you to your room, WITHOUT TAURGIS OR SURDAMA KIR OR ANYONE ELSE NOTICING. AND ALL YOU CAN SAY IS 'HEY'?!"

"Oh." Maia said meekly.

Sangaril threw a pair of pants and a shirt at Maia. "Put these on and grab some gold."

Maia barely caught them, startled and hung-over as she was. "Why?"

"Because we have to go get Iari."

The walk to the tavern was uneventful; no one recognized Maia with her hair down and unkempt, with next to no makeup on, and in other words looking more or less like any other village teen. And if any though it odd that a Munari was so far away from the sea, well, no one said it out loud.

Yes, the walk was uneventful.

But the duo's time at the tavern was not.

The moment the two entered the tavern, a dangerously calm, oddly familiar voice spoke to them. "So you decided to come back, after all."

Maia grinned weakly. "Uh, hi Iari. What, um, brings you here?"

Later, Maia and Sangaril both would thank Laharah that the tavern was empty.

"WHAT BRINGS ME HERE!?" Iari screeched in fury, "YOU SOLD ME TO THE IMBECILE THAT OWNS THIS PLACE WHEN YOU WERE SO DRUNK YOU COULD BARELY LIFT A MUG TO YOUR MOUTH!"

FIN