"Superheroes" by Sam Carter O'Neill Wagtail JEDI

Pairings: Carter/O'Neill

Spoilers for season 4's "Upgrades" and "Divide and Conquer"

Season 3's "Point of View"

A/N: It's a little confusing,but it'll make sense in the end.only took 27 minutes to scribble this down and I haven't edited it...but, eh. It was begging to be written.

I'd seen it. He'd kissed me. But then, not me.

Kawalsky calledDr. Carterhis "best friend's wife…" And we all know Jack was his best friend. They were married! But that's impossible—just like in Daniel's alternate reality except. Those Samantha Carters weren't in the Air Force. But they had Jack… and he was dead.

But… I'd watched through the mirror as he kissed her. It was so awkward. Especially when he came back:

"Major." He'd said, clearing his throat.

I just looked at the ground and nodded, "Sir." The room was busy and everyone was moving, Daniel was apprising General Hammond onwhat had happened. I looked up to see Jack was still standing before me. And he was staring at me with one of the most serious looks I'd ever seen on his face. He was trying to tell me something without words. And I understood.

That was the beginning. The knowledge that somewhere, somehow we were together was the first brick removed in the wall we didn't even know we'd built.

But as I thought, I remembered that in those places, where Jack and I were…that way, there was mass destruction. It killed me, day by day, as the... feelings between us matured.

And now he's going to give his life for me. We've both been compromised. We're… zatarcs. New Goa'uld technology designed to… no, I can't even think about it.

"Janet," I look up to the doctor who's become my best friend in the past three years.

I can't do this! I can't let him die for me! Especially when it might not even work…

I close my eyes in resignation as the sedative begins to course through my veins. When Janet and Daniel told me today that the colonel was going to have his brain picked apartand I saw him walk by, I called him. He looked back, his eyes telling me why he was doing this.

I remember being in the Goa'uld ship, with the shields up.

"The C-4's gonna go! You have to get out of here! "

"No!"

I was so scared that he wouldn't leave me; that he'd die too. He couldn't die because I—because of my feelings for him… Feelings! That was it!

"The machine is wrong. We lied. We didn't even know we were lying…"

And now I'm standing at the other edge of the Zatarc testing device, the colonel sits in the chair.

"I didn't leave because I care about her. A lot more than I'm supposed to."

My heart stops. I always knew. But this… this is impossible. Unacceptable! As much as I reciprocate, this can never be. For so many reasons. Because it's forbidden… and because… mass destruction. I close my eyes in a pain that tears my soul apart.

We will still communicate without words because that's the way we are; there is a special bond between us that cannot be broken. But…

Those armbands had given us superpowers, and we'd discovered our kryptonite.