Well hello, this is my first fan fiction in about 2 years and thanks to my friend I've got the bug again! So this is my first Twilight fanficand I thought of it after re-watching Lost In Austen last week so i decided to cross it with Twilight. The name comes from a song by the Butthole Surfers that i had on repeat when writing this and I felt it was fairly appropriate so that's how it happened!

We meet Roisin Taylor, she's a 17 year old girl living in Houston (see what I did there?) and is a Twilight addict. She's petite, brunette with green eyes and a bit shy and anti-social as you will no doubt learn but it's part of the plot i guess.

Anyway, read, rate, appreciate. Thank you!

*****

I perched anxiously on the edge of my stool, drumming my fingers vigorously against the worn wooden desk. The clock was ticking at a ridiculously slow speed; it was almost painful to watch the second hand inch forward.

3 minutes till the end of the period, 3 agonising minutes.

Time flies when you're having fun. My inner self commented dryly as I adjusted myself on my stool and glanced around the room. The hum of chatter filled my ears once more as I return to reality; I was sitting alone at the middle desk as everyone else diffused into their own little cliques around the edges of the classroom, gossiping and nattering to one another about the weekend, homework, love, sex and all manner of subjects worth including in the teenage banter. I would like to say I was above all that nonsense but I couldn't help but strain to hear the conversations taking place a few feet from myself:

"Did you hear about Kelly's party? I was soooo pished!"

"Mr McKinnon gave me lunchtime detention for not wearing my tie, what a prick!"

"Well Carla heard from Liam and told me that Steven said he wouldn't touch Sophie with a bargepole, apparently she caught crabs from that 5th year Mark Harley, do you know him?"

"No way! The only chance that Hearts have of winning the league this year is if Rangers loose the next 3 matches, they're a good 8 points ahead."

"Eww, look at this text! My mum is such a weirdo, casserole for dinner? I think not!"

I zoned out again, I didn't know half the people they were talking about and I have always been a great fan of casserole so I couldn't understand what they were moaning about. I glanced once more at the clock and a surge of excitement coursed through me – 30 seconds!!!

As the bell rang I bolted out the door, I think knocking a couple of people out of the way judging by the jeers than rang down the corridor behind me as I ran.

It was home time so finding a decent seat on the school bus was essential and being first there I settled myself behind the driver and plonked my rucksack on the seat beside me as to discourage anyone from talking to me. Rummaging around in my bag I found my headphones and stuck them on, selecting one of my mellower artists and turning the volume as high as possible as to drown out the growling engine of the bus.

Bliss.

Now for the pièce de résistance; at the very bottom of my rucksack I grasped the spine and pulled out a very dog-eared copy of Stephanie Meyer's Eclipse.

Finding my page I curled up on the seat in attempt to get comfy, the vibration of the bus trembling up my back. I began to read:

'"Do you really have any idea how important you are to me? Any concept at all of how much I love you?" He pulled me tighter against his hard chest, tucking my head under his chin.

I pressed my lips against his snow-cold neck. "I know how much Ilove you," I answered.

"You compare one small tree to the entire forest."

I rolled my eyes, but he couldn't see. "Impossible."

He kissed the top of my head and sighed.'

A shudder stirred me from my dreamy state, we appeared to be moving. Every seat in the bus was filled withschool kids, all looking rather sleepy and relieved to be outside the confines of school, I would like to say I could understand it but I enjoyed school, the structure, the variety of subjects and the higher you climb the more respect you received from the teachers. The only thing I like more than school is Twilight. I guess you could say I'm an addict; I'veread Twilight 23 times, New Moon 17, Eclipse 17 and Breaking Dawn 19 times. Bit sad maybe but every school girl is obsessed with it at the moment, every girl in my year raved about the film for weeks afterwards, desperately wishing for Robert Pattinson to barge through their history classroom door and wrap them in his arms. I felt a smile playing across my face as I daydreamed, if only, if only, if only!

I wish I could live in Twilight world.

We were coming to my stop so I slung my headphones around my neck and with bag in one hand, book in the other I staggered off the bus amongst the clutter of others heading home. I was a few houses down from the bus stop so it only took a few minutes to reach my front door. I slung my bag over my shoulder and pulled it across me, searching through my mess to find my key. As fate would have it they were at the bottom, wedged in a crumb infested corner. I opened up, flinging my rucksack in the corner and picking up any mail scattered across the floor and flicking through them as I kicked the door shut.

Suddenly my head snapped up, I guess you call it instinct but I could tell something was wrong. It was then I heard a smash and a hushed profanity coming from the kitchen area. I quietly picked up my dads golfing umbrella and inched myself closer to the kitchen.

The sight that hit me was certainly not the one I expected.