Disclaimer: I don't own Blood or any of its characters.
Never Said
Is it wrong to feel this way? I couldn't answer that question even if I wanted to. No one has any control over would they love. Let me rephrase that, people have no control over who they fall in with. You're living your life one day and the next you know someone comes into it and changes your whole world.
That may not be entirely accurate but that's how it was for me. I can just vaguely remember when it was just me, dad, and Riku. We were happy, but the day that dad "adopted" her… I can remember dad introducing us for the first time. She had been so nervous that she could barely look at me and Riku. She was so caught in examining her shoes she couldn't tell that I was just as nervous as she was.
At first we really didn't get along all that well, but that was probably because we really didn't talk. Not sure we ever would have if it had not been for Riku. He was always trying to get use to do stuff together. Whether it be going to the beach, playing catch, or just relaxing at home. Riku always had been the bond that kept us together. Guess it's no surprise that we fell out of touch once we lost him.
Things sure were crazy during those two years. Constantly moving, battles against monsters, and finding out about Saya. The Red Shield, Chiropterans, and the Schiff seemed like something straight out of a movie. When I first read Joel's Diary and discovered the truth about Saya, I was shocked but there was a part of me…Then Riku had to become a Chevalier…I pushed myself away from Saya then but not entirely for the reasons that she and Riku thought. I guess it was around that time that I first started to develop these feelings?
I loved her but…this was a different type of love that I was feeling. I had the constant urge to want to hold her, be near her, to feel her warmth and see her smile. Needless to say it was a little unnerving. I mean her is a girl I had always looked at like a little sister and now I was…I don't want to say lusting but it was something akin to that.
I had to push away so I could get my head together. Saya and I had just gotten things straightened out when the incident on the ship happened and we were separated for a year. I made up my mind during that time that if, no when I saw here again I would tell her how I felt. Yeah, I lost my resolve somewhere along the way.
But when I saw her on that foggy London night, no words can describe how I felt. My heart leapt into my throat. I couldn't believe that she was real. But she had changed when she came back. She was colder, more ruthless, and more willing to kill. She pushed me away just as I had done her before.
I was determined not to lose her again. The harder she tried to push, the harder I tried to make her see that I would always be there for her. When I told her about us going back to Okinawa together I really had planned on telling her then. Things got so out of control after that day. We were either traveling or fighting Chevaliers every day after that.
Sometimes if you wait too long to do or say something you find out that it's too late. That's what happened to me at the end of those two years. My heart broke seven ways to Sunday when I found out that she planned to kill herself after she killed Diva. I panicked and turned to the only person who could help me then. Hagi. If my heart was broken before then it turned to dust when she kissed Hagi.
Hagi died in the bombing on the opera house that same night. She was distraught over it but Saya's a strong girl. She put on a happy face not long after we returned to Okinawa. Things returned to, dare I say it, normal. I opened Dad's shop and Saya returned to school. For a few months anyway. Her long sleep was coming and each day brought with it the fear that she would sleep without me ever having told her how I felt.
Then came the night of the party. Everyone was having a good time joking, laughing, and enjoying good food. Soon though I noticed that Saya had disappeared. I found her outside just as she was falling to the ground. I caught her before she fell all the way but when she said, "Take me back to where I began"; there came that familiar pain in my heart. I tried to think of what to say to her the whole way there but the words just wouldn't come to me. As I carried her up the steps I still didn't know what to say but Saya had saved me there.
"Kai," she had said sleepy "What do you think the world will be like when I wake up?"
"I don't know." I had responded. "Maybe Okinawa will be even more beautiful than it is now."
We had continued on in silence after that until I thought that she might have already fallen asleep on my back when she asked another question. "Will I be alone?"
"No Saya. I'll be there waiting for you as soon as you wake up." I had said trying to reassure her. Truthfully I wasn't sure. Thirty years is a long time and a lot could happen.
"Kai," she said even more tiredly than before, "Will you stay with me?"
Her words were so slow and weak that I had to run them through my head a few times to understand what she said. Even then I still didn't understand what she saying. "What do you mean Saya?"
"Will…you…stay…with me?"
The realization of what she meant finally dawned on me. Did she really mean…Could I…Was I ready to give up everything around me for the chance to be with her. I did it two years ago without hesitation what's the difference now. "Of course." I answered her.
I stood in front of the tomb now with her on my back wondering what to do next when she ever so slightly shifted on my back. "Kai." She called weakly.
I turned my head to her and I saw that she had bitten her lip…hard enough to draw blood. I hesitated only a moment before I pressed my lips to hers. It was not a kiss more so the only way I could drink the blood that would allow me to be with her. Maybe I did keep my lips pressed against her lips longer than needed I don't know anymore. I pulled away as I felt the thick fluid sliding down my throat.
Saya looked at me through half-lidded eyes before mumbling what I thought was a thank you. Her eyes then closed and her body went limp against me and I knew that that would be the last time I would hear her voice for years. I laid her down as I opened the tomb where she would rest. I saw for the first time the cocoon that she had came out of as I laid her gently back into the silken strands. The thought crossed my mind as to what effect Saya's blood will have on me being that I'm still alive and only have Riku's experience to go on. I got my answer as a terrible pain racked my entire body and then my world went black.
How long I was out, I couldn't say but on awakening I felt different. I knew then that her blood had run its course. I looked to where she lay only to see that the cocoon had already completely sealed up. I shed the last of my tears in silence as I closed the tomb and made my way back to the road.
That was twenty years ago. I sit on the beach soaking up the sun as I watch my two nieces playing together. It startling how much they look like their mom and aunt. I'm thinking now to what I'll say ten years from now when she wakes up. It's ironic that I chewed on Hagi for not ever telling his feelings until the very last moment but here I am doing the same. I wonder if years from now I'll be able to tell Saya how I feel. If I'll be able to get out the three words I never said.
A/N: Never really been into the whole brother/sister complex thing but after watching Blood I really wanted these two together. So here you have it.(technically they're not together but you get the point) Sorry to the Hagi lovers but he had to die in this one. R&R
